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Not too Manic Monday [22 Nov 2004|02:27pm] [ mood | artistic ] [ music | Everlast~Babylon Feeling ] Dave is so amazing. This piece is so detailed and it's jammed packed full of symbolism...just genius...once again! ;) The piece is called 'Vestiges' Dave used a modle for this one. It's our lovely friend shyfayrie who is also an awesome artist. It's such an honor to be in one of David's paintings. Being immortalized by such a master is an exquisit feeling. Dave will be putting this one up for auction tonight if anyone is interested. Last night I worked my little fingers raw...heh...I know, I'm a drama queen. >;) I added a bunch of new prints to Dave's eBay store. So go buy buy buy! I'm sure a lot of you are already Christmas shopping! Perfect gifts! http://stores.ebay.com/davidgoughart Speaking of that I'm gonna go put some Christmas music on and make some Christmas Crafts. I like making people gifts! It's fun and cheap! *l* ;D But before I go I want to wish my dear friend Kayti fragirl a very very HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAYTI!!! Love you sweet fraqueen! xoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxxo 3 comments|post comment

Within Temptation [16 Nov 2004|02:02pm] [ mood | artistic ] [ music | Within Temptation~Dark Wings ] Dave's little girl Emma introduced me to a band that I've become addicted to. They're called Within Temptation. I bought their album called Mother Earth over a week ago and it's still in my CD player. The album also came with a DVD which had videos, concert performances and behind the scenes stuff. The video to the song Mother Earth is kick ass! Ice Queen is one of my favorite songs along with Mother Earth, Dark Wings and In Perfect Harmony. It's a heavy metal band with a woman lead singer. But they're not the heavy metal I usually think of. They're quite a few different things mixed together. Classical, celtic folk, ambient techno. Think V.A.S.T. with Kate Bush as their lead singer, mixed in with a bit of Metalica, Tori Amos, and a hint of Alanis Morrisette's vocals. I love every single song on it and I can't wait to buy their next album called Stand my Ground. Just wanted to recomend this group to all my friends. They're really only big in Europe right now but I hope they start to make it in the States too...as long as it doesn't ruin their sound. Sometimes that happens when groups make it accross The Pond. I know a lot of you will love the sound of this group....and hey! The lead singer, Sharon, is hot! >;) Liked this quote I found "Within Temptation tries to take their listeners on a journey to a fantasy world, where magic still exists" Go check out their website. I think you can view one of their videos if you have the right program. http://www.within-temptation.com/ 11 comments|post comment

Skyflower...the greatest gift of love [15 Nov 2004|05:12pm] [ mood | giddy ] [ music | Clanad~Strange Land ] Another masterpiece from my David. This one is extra special. He's painted me as his flower/moon goddess. He makes me feel like this painting looks everyday. Not really sure how to put how I feel about this one into words. All I can say is...I've dreamt of this man and his artwork ever since I was a child. As everyday...still in in disbelief. Skyflower The auction begins tonight from 9:30PST from $20 with a $350 bin. http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item;=3762277196 14 comments|post comment

Here we come...right back where we started from! [08 Nov 2004|05:16pm] [ mood | ecstatic ] [ music | Bubba Sparxx ] We got our interview date! Yay! Yay! Yay! :D I barely have fingernails left after waiting so long! But we're on our way! I know we don't have the visa in our hands yet but I don't forsee any problems *knock on wood* so we'll be in SD before next summer! Heh, Dave wants to tell his boss NOW! I don't blame him. I don't want him to have to spend another day in that hell-hole. :-/ But it's a necessary evil. And seeing him today gave me so much hope. Every Monday is so hard for him. The grey gloom usually clouds his eyes when I see him at lunch. But today all that changed. He was, forgive the punn, bright of eye and busshied of tail. *LOL* We laughed and giggled about things...we tried to tear each other's clothes off at the most inappropriate moments. >;) There is so much freakin' hope it's spilling over the brim and even Mondays can't overcome us anymore! Ha! We laugh in your face Monday! So we're on our way down to London on December the 2nd. That visa is going to be the best Christmas present EVER! *sings* Californiaaaaaaaaah! Californiaaaaaaaaah! Here we coooooooooooome! :D Memory of the Day: Sending off our i-129 forms back on February! FEBRUARY!!! It's been a wait but a well worth wait. Thanks to everyone who has supported us...especially you Bren! Freakin' love you, girl! xoxoxoxoxox 15 comments|post comment

Training wheels and icing [28 Oct 2004|11:20am] [ mood | happy ] [ music | Madonna~The Power of Goodbye ] I don't really have anything huge to talk about today. No life changing events...no crisis...just a good feeling. But I thought even that deserves to be recorded. I walked down our street this morning and there was such a positive feeling in the air. That might seem so trivial to some but when you live here in a place like this you learn to cherish those moments when you don't feel surrounded by bad spirits. It's all connected to our sixth sense which isn't something that's very open in me. I wish I was a bit more psychic...think it would be kinda neat...but I do have a good instinct and I know when there are positive and negative forces working around us. Well today just seems very relaxed and open. The sun is shining (I'll enjoy it for as long as it lasts today which might be short lived *l*), the leaves on the trees are beautiful colors, the animals in the park seemed so happy, I could see my breath on the cool air for the first time this season, the streets were cleaner than usual...even the girl in the shop who is usually a miserable cow smiled at me. I'm going to work today but first I get to go have lunch with my prince. You know there are so many days when those negative forces are strong but even on those days he makes me feel like I'm in heaven. So on days like these he's the buttery, smooth, creamy, belgian chocolate icing on the cake. :P Sometims that little gremlin in my head tells me I'm going to jinx whatever good luck is bestowed on us but today he's packing his bags. I'm done with that. It's in my nature to always be optomistic about the future and that's how I want to stay. Positive EVERDAY no matter what! Memory of the Day: The day my Dad took the training wheels off my bike. I called it 'flower' because it was pink, purple and had flowers on the seat (my friends and I always named our bikes). We had a long drive way so he had me riding in a circle on it while he held on making sure I could keep it upright. It only took me a few tries before I was off down the street. I couldn't believe how quickly I was able to balance it. I guess he believed in me more than I did and his confidence in me pushed me. It's a special memory...one of those that shape the person you will always be. Thanks Dad. 12 comments|post comment

Heaven [22 Oct 2004|05:14pm] [ mood | loved ] [ music | Madonna~Substitute for Love ] I feel so full today. Full of love, full of hope, full of dreams...dreams about the past and the future. It's five years since I met David online and it's flown over in an instant...but what an instant it's been. Saying it's been an adventure would be a vast understatement. How can all this joy and good fortune be bestowed to someone like me? I haven't had the kind of struggle and strife so many have had and here I am living a dream I couldn't have imagined years ago. I never thought I'd find the bliss that comes along with being in love. I fell so hard for David so early. Even at a stage where I probably shouldn't have. >:) I guess my soul just knew and didn't see the point in 'taking things slow'. Alot of it is fuzzy and muddled and I know why. I was so determined to get over here so I could be with David I really wasn't concerned much with anything else. It might sound romantic to some or harsh to others. But just like survival, you just push through whatever you have to in order to reach your goal. And here I am. I still can't believe I'm here sometimes. I still can't believe that a man like David...a man who is beautiful, intelegent, loving, tender, honest, exciting, mysterious, honorable and handsome loves me as much and as purely as he does. I don't know the words. They fail me when it comes to what we have. So I'll use everything my soul has to give to show him everyday how much I cherish him...the time we've had and the all the time we have left. David, you've swept me up in a whrilwind of an adventure. You've given me everything of yourself...you've kept nothing back. I can't ever thank you enough. But I'll try...everyday. Everday with you...is heaven 16 comments|post comment

Halloween Jack [18 Oct 2004|11:19am] [ mood | thankful ] [ music | Afro Clet Sound System ] Another 'Proud Girlfriend' moment. I had to share this one with you all. He's just too beautiful not to show him off. >;) "Each year in Ireland, on All Hallows Eve,a tale that has been whispered through generations, is told of a man named Jack. Banished from both heaven and hell, his plight is to wander as an immortal for all eternity. Here, Jack stoops on a graveyard tomb, beneath a withering oak, shedding bitter tears like fallen leaves,for the parody his existence has become, and for loves lost through the centuries." It's called 'The Gods forgot they made me' and I'm so in love with this painting. I suggested to Dave that he do an oval or circle canvas...and he did! :D He has that manly, rugged, tough, sexy air about him just like my lover. Here's the eBay link if you're interested! http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item;=3755841476 14 comments|post comment

FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLYYYYYYYY!!!! :) [08 Oct 2004|10:19pm] [ mood | ecstatic ] [ music | The Green Wing on TV ] Such awesome news today! David signed a contract with a licensing company and his tiles are now available from the following link courtesy of Pagan Wholesale: David Gough art ceramic tiles The ceramic tiles are approx. 4"x4" (they're actually 4.25"x4.25"). They're meant for decoration more than for actual use-you can't burn incense or candles on them or you'll damage the image. There are also accessories that go with the tiles- solid wood boxes (in maple, mahogany, cherry or several neon colors) that have indentations in them so that they hold a single tile, and they have wood frames for them (also in maple, mahogany and cherry), as well as tiny easels that can be attached to the back of tiles so that the tiles stand up by themselves. Any queries about the products should be posted to kevin@quicksilverdragon.com I have it on good authority that t-shirts, tote bags and greetings cards will also be made available later today, so keep checking the link above. Kevin has already added some t-shirts and the rest will be coming soon! Sooner than we thought! :D With Christmas just around the corner, I couldn't think of a better gift you could give someone:) And you not only would be giving a gift to your loved one, you'd be helping to make our dreams come true! All the money Dave makes from his artwork is going towards our move accross The Pond. I just want to thank everyone who has believed in David and encouraged him. All the hard work is finally paying off! *screaming with delight inside* :D 9 comments|post comment

Alright universe! Go pick on someone your own size! [05 Oct 2004|02:50pm] [ mood | pissed off ] [ music | Afro Celt ] Everythings gotta even out doesn't it? When you have a few days that are great...you're in a good mood, things are going your way, you feel the universe is finally on your side...then you get to the bottom of the contract and in fine print it says something about repaying said good luck and happiness with an equal (sometimes greater) portion of pain and hardship. Last night we realised Dave's site has disappeared. We tried calling Yahoo in California...not a cheap call for us to make...and they had closed shop just about ten minutes before. Then this morning, surprise surprise! Dave isn't getting any emails through his Yahoo account! So all orders he might be getting, all his contacts (and he's got quite a few really really important ones right now)...nothing is getting through to us and it so frustrating and nerve-wracking. Who knows how much money we've lost already because of all this. So I'm sitting here waiting for four o'clock to roll around so we can get a service that we're already paying for to work properly! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! >:-/ I'm just trying to force myself to think happy thoughts so I don't start ripping the furniture to shreds and/or pulling my hair out. It's days like these that make the good ones all that much sweeter...right? 20 comments|post comment

Birthday is here...and the surfs up! [14 Sep 2004|11:20am] [ mood | loved ] [ music | Big Country~In a Big Country ] 24 today. Wow...where is the time going? Does it have a secret hiding place it runs to at the speed of light or what! Don't really feel older but I do feel different. I guess that would be feeling older but it isn't a feeling of regret or dread...I'm starting to feel comfortable in my own skin again. Like I've said to Dave before I think adolesence isn't the last time we go through a stage of 'awkwardness'. But I've made it through and I'm feeling confident again...in control and...happy with the woman I'm becoming. So I suppose this will be a birthday that will go into the history books as a positive and happy transition. Heaven knows I should be scared, unsure and terrified at the changes that will soon happen in my life but it's all starting to flow again. I had a mental picture yesterday of life as almost a wave that runs parallel with the ground. Sometimes we're surfing the wave with little struggle or effort and sometimes we get thrown to the ground where we have to run, stumble over, lose strenght, scrape our toes on the gravel...but I know that struggle makes times like these so much sweeter. So...I know where I am...I'm pretty sure I know who I am...I know who I want to be...I know who I want to spend the rest of my life with...and I'm excited about today and tomorrow. Yay for being happy and stable!!! I can't say as much for my physical state, though. :-/ I've been sick for a few days now. Seems to always catch me right around my birthday because in England the climate decides to plumett all at once during this week. My San Diegan weekling body goes into sock and re-pays me by getting sick. Oh well...it hasn't been the worst cold I've ever had. :) And I'm feeling much better today. Dave has been my knight, prince and doctor with the nicest bedside manner. >;) He's made endless trips out to the shops to get me what I needed. He's made me special concoctions to releive the pain and strain. He's been patient with my constant weezing and hacking while he's trying to sleep. When the frustration and pain started to overwhelm me he's cradled me in his arms and told me it's going to alright. I can't ever really tell or show him how much I love and appreciate him but I'm going to spend the rest of my life trying to do just that. And if that wasn't enough to make anyone melt. I woke up to a mountianous stack of pressies for my birthday and a delivery of roses. They're my favorite color rose and there's like fourty of 'em! I almost asked the dude who delivered them to help me drag them upstairs it's so big! Are there any roses left in the world? *lol* :D I keep telling him that he's already spoilt me rotten but he just won't have it! I don't deserve you, my love. I am luckier than I ever thought I'd be. I only hope I show you everday how much I love you. I've lived a privledged life and so I never thought that even after the happy childhood my parents gave me I would find my sould mate. Even after I admited to myself that I really didn't believe you existed the fates decided to put you in my life. A thousand thank yous wouldn't suffice. But...thank you, my love. We have forever...it's going to be so beautiful! Memory of the Day: I know it only happened a few hours ago but it was so wonderful. Shawna called me at 6:30am this morning to wish me happy birhtday. Hearing her voice transports me home. She's my sister and I miss her everyday. I'm so lucky to have her in my life and to STILL have her in my life even though I'm so far away. She's so selfless and kind. I hope I'm at least an ounce like her. We talked about our lives, our families. We gossiped like two little old ladies with nothing better to do. And you know we'll be doing that even when we're old and gray. *lol* The day I get to look into her eyes again will be a day of true happiness. I'm so glad that this will be the last birthday that we'll be apart. I can't wait to spoil her next year on her birthday. :) 25 comments|post comment

The past haunts so lovely [06 Aug 2004|04:56pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | Everlast~Babylon ] It's been a good day. And it's only 4:26 so there's plenty more to come. :) The beautiful warm sun has made the day so much easier. The last couple weeks have been torture. If you live in a place where the sky is almost always white you'll understand what I mean. Not blue bits with grey clouds...just white. It's so uninviting and harsh. You know when you go the a grocery store at night. You walk in from the darkness into this bright florecent light and it takes a minute to get used to...well multiply the discomfort by 10 and you got it. Not only has the light been annoying but it's been so humid and sticky! I'm sick of this humidity! I'll take a Santa Ana wind any day over this sticky weather. But today has been a huge improvement. We finally got blue skies! I think the couple thunder storms we've had this week has helped. They were cool. We get proper thunder storms here...the kind they have in the movies. >:) It wasn't too hard to get up and get ready this morning...well not as hard as it usually is. Work wasn't too bad. Had a lovely lunch with my man (and I'd just like to re-iterate to a few of you...MY NAKIE BOY! *lol* just kidding). We got some errands done and I got some house chores done when I got home. I should have done my dance workout but I got too involved with LJ. Damn you Live Journal! I have far too many interesting friends here! ;) So I'm a naughty girl but at least I'm not neglecting my journal! I got an awesome message today too! I opened my inbox and there was an email from Classmates.com. I usually delete these messages because I started to feel being a member was pointless. You can see the list of all your fellow classmates but you can't email them unless you pay for the service. So I opened the email up and scrolled down to the bottom for intructions on how to unsubscribe. The link took me to a sign in page. I signed in and selected the Unsubscribe button and a message came up...something like "Lani are you sure you want to unsubscribe because you have a message waiting for you.." I clicked cancel, curious as to who could have sent me a message. I assumed it would probably be a form letter from Classmates.com just as a way to distract me from ending my membership. When I finally found my message box I looked down and there it was...you have a message from Linda Petersen...jaw dropped to the floor...rubbed my eyes to make sure I wasn't seeing things...yup...I almost closed down my Classmates account the very day after Linda sent me a message. What are the chances of that...anyway. I've sent her message with my email address and my LJ URL and I'm just hoping Classmates.com don't read it and delete that info. If they do then one of us would have to fork over some cash just to get each other's email address...greedy bastards...I guess I shouldn't be bitter. It is cool they let her send me a message at all. At least I know she's alive, well and wants to get in touch with me! I'm all shades of stoked! :D So hopefully she'll email me soon and we can update each other on our lives. I know I have plenty of news to tell her about and I'm sure she will too. It probably won't be long before we can see each other again. It's been far too long. I really regret not getting in touch with her the few times I've been back to SD. Oh well. Finding old friends is so awesome! Especially ones that you should have never lost touch with. Memory of the day: Seeing Linda for the first time. She was in the Band Room putting her clarinet away. She was wearing a blue and orange hawaiian shirt. She was talking to a guy named Jeremy. I remember being a bit jealous but also curious. Jeremy was my buddy and I wanted to know who this red head was that was talking to MY friend. *lol* No! I was never egotistical! >:D Oh if I'd only known...being in her presence...how humbled I would become. >;) Just a quick side-note....baby....YOUR'S....forever! ;) xoxoxoxox 6 comments|post comment

for my beloved... [30 Jul 2004|05:18pm] [ mood | hot ] [ music | BT Feat. Rose McGowan - Superfabulous ] He's there always...my mind full Would that I could show him Show him the pull I'm drawn in ways only the darkness can tell Are you reall real? Perhaps a clever spell... Because you're mine...I'm your's the same Know in your heart, my love My passion...not one can tame You'll be here forever...so will I When the world ends and ashes Our spirits still fly That's not the beginning of the end That's our gift of eternity Take me...keep me...I'm your's 9 comments|post comment

Motivation...knockin' on my door [19 Jul 2004|10:53am] [ mood | thankful ] [ music | Madonna~Substitute for Love ] I can't believe how fast this month is going by. It's like my life has turned into a NASCAR race and the years are the super-fast race cars speeding past me while I watch in dismay. Where are you going! Come back! Next month is August and the one after that is September. So I'm almost 24...it feels like my 23rd birthday was yesterday! Hell! I can remember being 17 like it was two seconds ago. I think I'm just feeling frustrated with myself right now. Why does it take so much to motivate myself to be creative. I have all these ideas in my head and I haven't done anything with them in so long. I think I'm letting myself get overwhelmed by all the ideas I have and all the other "things" I want to take care of. I need to start taking one day at a time. Where do I get this shit from?! I think it's just my brain malfunctioning. It's going to get a tune up today. Maybe if I smack it against the wall hard enough....j/k....I actually feel quite good today. I feel a new sense of motivation I haven't had in a while. Well...I'm writing in my journal! I must be motivated! :D I got up, got dressed, put my face on, did the dishes, straightened up the livingroom, wrote some emails...and I've written in my journal! A very good start to the day, Lani...keep it up all day and you just might get a gold star! Woah...bit too much cheese there. ;) I've been listening to Madonna's Ray of Light album a lot lately. We got a Winamp installed on our computer and we got loads of great music from our friends including Ray of Light. I have it on in the morning and it helps to get me started for the day. Some music just speaks to you in a deep and meaningful way. I'm very draw to music by women. As a woman myself I think it's encouraging hearing music by strong women. In a society where women are expected to be so much more than they ever have been it's so important to know we're not alone. We can do everything we want and more. Dave and I took a walk along the river yesterday. It was gorgeous day. Even the water looked and smelt nice for once! Usually the river Mersey looks and smells like the gods use it for a toilet. >:-p Ick! But it looked clear and clean and smelt of the salty sea. It made me miss home so much. Sometimes I just like to forget about all the preperations and just think about being there, relaxing on the beach...the sun on my face with my man out on his surf board catching some waves, or out shopping with my Shawnie-pop, or spending time with my family. I know it's coming soon and it's what gets us out of bed every morning. We saw Spiderman 2 and it was awesome! The story as well as the character choices were so great. Thoroughly entertaining. Dave and I were practically jumping out of our seats at some points. :) If you haven't already...go see it!!! Memory of the day: My dad and I went to see Jurasic Park in the theatre and we had to sit in the front row! It was the first time we'd seen it so not only was it new and terrifying...it was up-close-and-personal! It was exhilirating but having a sore neck afterwards wasn't very fun! *lol* 5 comments|post comment

Be patient, be patient, don't be in such a hurry... [06 Jul 2004|04:28pm] [ mood | mellow ] [ music | Men At Work~Land Down Under ] I think waiting is one of the most difficult things. It seems to have become more difficult as I've grown older. Waiting for trains, waiting to pay for your shopping, waiting for the new series of The O.C., waiting to cross the road, waiting for the INS office to approve your visa application so you can the hell outta this country! Heh I think we become more and more impatient...(god I am SICK and TIRED of our flat stinking of cigarettes because of that woman downstairs!!! Yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!!! *runs upstairs to get the nice jasmine smelly air freshner...mmmm, that's better!)...sorry got a bit side-tracked there. >:) I think we become more and more impatient as we grow older because we don't have that sense of immortality. Well, it's more like the complete disregard for mortality. It's not that I used to think "Hmmm, I think I'll take this risk because, hell! I'm immortal!" I just have so much more to lose now and I realize it. I have this desire to live every moment of life to it's fullest and it feels so hard to do that when we have to spend so much of our time working for money. Dave has to do it here and once we're in the States, I'm going to have to go off to work. No wonder there are so many failing relationships in this consumer-ruled society we live in today. There is so much to pay for and to acquire we get tunnel vision and aren't given enough time to focus on all the important, fulfilling, beautiful, exciting, rejuvenating things around us. I only get one hour during the daytime to spend with David at lunchtime. It's always wonderful and we cherish that time but it goes by so quickly. It seems so unfair that we have to be working more than we get to be spending time with our loved ones. I know some people thrive on that but that aint me. I just can't wait until we're in a position where both of us can stay home, most of the time if not full time, together. Relax with each other, laugh with each other, rest with each other, take care of each other, teach each other, love each other. Just more things to be impatient about. We'll work our butts off to reach that goal and until then we'll enjoy all those little moments, ever quick and fleeting as they are...but oh so precious. Thanks for picking up the mailing tubes, babe. I feel bad that I didn't buy them when I saw them. You're my hero. Memory of the day: Waiting in line to get into The Cox arena to see Rob Zombie and Korn. The line was like a mile long. Wow! What a show! Now THAT was worth waiting for! :P 14 comments|post comment

[30 Jun 2004|06:55pm] [ mood | accomplished ] [ music | Afro Celt ] After much nail biting and hair pulling I finally got this quiz together! I hope it works for you all!!! Let me know if there are any problems. And please tell your friends!!! :D Learning to Fly 1: You're an earthy person who loves to enjoy the great outdoors with others. You're always laughing because you see the surreal, funny side of life. You make others laugh often too. Which www.davidgoughart.com Fairy Are You? 4 comments|post comment

Chasing the Clouds Away [16 Jun 2004|08:58pm] [ mood | loved ] [ music | TV ] As I'm growing and maturing through the years my eyes are opening wider and wider. Appreciating the little things in life, not worrying about anything and everything that might happen, leaving things to fate but still holding on to responsibility. It makes the here and now so sweet. Full belly, surrounded by love, lots to look forward to, warmed by the sun...full of joy. Life is good. 11 comments|post comment

Star Light, Star Bright...First Star I See Tonight [15 Jun 2004|11:31am] [ mood | cheerful ] [ music | Deep Forest ] Didn't wake up in the best of spirits this morning. My dreams haven't been of a very positive note lately. No real nightmares or anything important enough to remember but I always know when I've had a good dream. I wake up with sun inside my head instead of fog. But all was put to right after I read my lovies post from this morning. mercury_realm posted about his apprehension towards armidillos. That they might be rats with armour. When I called him as is our regular routine (ritual actually...routine just sounds so bland and nothing about our life is bland) this morning I told him that they aren't like rats because they're like ten times as big...didn't help...made it worse. *lol* He has never failed to make me smile every day. I looked up at the stars last night as I pulled the window down. It's so comforting to me, the thought that we seem so small and insignifigant compared to the great wide universe out there. If the world ever firmly places itself on your shoulders just remember to look to the sky on a clear night and imagine all the things that are going on up there. And if you're lucky enough to be in a place that's far from the lights of the city it's even more magnificent. Looking up there reminded me that my physical body trudging away at the rat race down here is so pale compared to my spirit which is connected to not only this planet but the whole of the universe. I'm not talking about being the center of the universe, just connected with everything else. That is so calming. There are still things to worry about and people to interact with but the course of fate will always take care of things the way they are suppose to happen. It's amazing how something as simple as looking at the stars can change my whole perseption on life for a little while....mmmm but the towels need to be cleaned...I need to start practicing my typing skills...I need to email Shawna...I need to start a new sewing project...I need to go pay the bills...Hmph just kidding! ;D 5 comments|post comment

Dream Orphans: part I [21 May 2004|05:04pm] [ mood | thankful ] [ music | Dirty Dancing~The Time of My Life ] Yea, yea...I know this is my third post. But I haven't posted in a LONG time! So DEAL! I want to show the world David's (mercury_realm) new painting and since you all are included in this category I'm going to post it here! I'm so proud of him. His auction is doing well. But if you or you know of anyone who would like to buy a masterpiece you can find the auction HERE. This is the first in a new series he's doing called "Dream Orphans" David's website 4 comments|post comment

San Diego Sunsets in my Roses [28 Apr 2004|11:18am] [ mood | loved ] [ music | Kate Bush~The Red Shoes ] Shawna sent me some pictures of her playing softball. I really enjoyed looking at them. But I emailed her and told her that they almost made me cry. Seeing her beautiful smile means so much to me. I know her so well I could almost smell her. She has this sweet smell kind of like what a new car or new clothes smell like. I hope I didn't make her worry. I'm not down I'm just frustrated. And I know there are many other reasons for moving to San Diego but she is a huge one. We might be seperated again, who knows. She might decide to go to graduate school in San Fransisco or another state but being in the same country is a lot better than this. :) I don't want her to be just good memories from high school. I want her to be part of my life again. We talked on the phone the other night and we laghed. We were actually laughing about laughing! I was telling her that I thought I'd lost her laugh. I have the habit of taking on other people's laughs. I used to laugh like Shawna all the time and I know when we're together again I'll start laughing like her again. Her laugh is music and her face in pure light. She has been there for me so much over the years. She's part of my life's foundation. I know exactly what a kindred spirit is now. I couldn't ever re-pay her for everything she's done for Dave and I but I'm sure as hell going to try! god I miss her. I'm not empty, though. How could I be with such a wonderful man in my life? Wonderful doesn't even begin to describe him. I'm sitting her looking at the jar full of roses on the TV. Last Friday Dave had another meltdown. The weight of the world once again, placed itself firmly on his shoulders. I tried to cheer him the best I could. And when it was time for him to come home I planned to hold him and lift his spirits in any way I could. I wasn't expecting to have MY spirits lifted above the very clouds! Instead of buying himself a bottle of his favorite wine as a treat, he bought me a boquet of sunset roses. My favorite roses are the orange ones that fade into red at the tips of the petals. I call them sunset roses. He brought them to the door and I almost broke down in tears. After such an awful day all he could think about was bringing me flowers to make me smile. I just wish more of my friends could find their true love like I have. I can't imagine not having David in my life. If I could be with him every second of every day I would. I know that might sound a bit over the top or unbelievable to some people. Most couples have to have their seperate activities so they don't get sick of each other. It's not that way with us. I call Dave twice every day. Once at 11am (in fact I just got off the phone with him) and once at 3pm. I go to see him at lunch ever day. If we didn't have that we wouldn't be able to get through the day. I love him so intensely and I feel so lucky to have his unconditional and undying love. I don't know if any of this will help anyone else or if it will just annoy them. I just needed to say it. I want these words to be here so we can always look back on them. I LOVE MY DAVID AND I WANT THE WORLD TO KNOW IT!!! :D I've got to go get beautiful for him because it's almost lunchtime! :P P.S. Don't any of you give up hope. They're out there somewhere looking for you and I know each and every one of you deserve to find him/her. And for those of you who have found them...hold on and don't ever let go...it's a fast ride. Because...well...time flies when you're in love! 11 comments|post comment

HAPPY BIRFDAY TO MY BABY! [24 Mar 2004|08:38pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | Best of Bowie ] He doesn't look a day older (though he'll tell you different). He's even more gorgeous than when we first met and I love him more everyday! I wish I could have spoiled him more but there wouldn't be enough money in the world to satisfy that urge for me. ;) I love you so much, my birfday boy. I am so very excited about our lives together. Everyday is an adventure with you. I'm a very lucky girl. I hope I can spoil you more this weekend cause you deserve it! xoxoxoxoxoxoxox 13 comments|post comment

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