When Joe and I returned from St. Kitts, we picked up two bottles of Brinley Gold Coffee Rum. One is already dead. For two occasional drinkers that should tell you that this is the yummiest stuff I have every put to my lips. I was all excited about smuggling some into Utah from New York, where I found a wine store that stocks Brinley Gold, only to discover this bad news link.

"Our Smooth (they ain't lying here) Coffee Rum is sold exclusively in St. Kitts and Nevis. We expect to bring this rum into the US market in the near future."

I guess I will have to settle for their Vanilla Rum until then. For those that are curious their mango version tastes like a mango schnapps.

My baby girl (cat) ended up missing on Friday night. Mona may be a pain in the ass and act like a princess, but I still love her dearly. I cried pretty damn hard when I couldn't find her. On top of this, I had to go to Vegas (another story) on Sunday and come back on Tuesday, so I wouldn't even be around. So I gave Joe my phone and she fielded calls when I was away.

As it turns out... Mona was walking by the dumpster in our parking lot when a hispanic lady that spoke very little english 'found' her. Mona was wearing a collar with my phone number and address, so instead of walking the 20 paces to my door, she decided to take Mona across town to HER home. This would be fine if she called right away, but she waited four days until she had someone else call. But that was only because Mona escaped her captors.

Joe had my phone and took the call. Apparently the lady had tons of kids, and they were all out looking for her. Joe and her brother when to the area where the lady lived and the minute Mona heard Joe she came out from hiding. The Lady even took Mona's collar OFF!!!

So in my mind this bitch tried to steal my baby girl, but thankfully Mona was smart enough to escape and didn't try to cross Salt Lake's infamous four lane streets. I feel bad because I initially thought she had ran away.

As a safety she has (for a while now) an Avid chip (www.avidid.com) so the minute someone tried to take her to a vet or the humane society I would get a call. For those that don't know about the process, they inject via needle a small microchip inbetween the animal's shoulder blades. When wanded with a scanner, this chip gives off a bar-code of sorts that when cross referenced with the Avid database, comes up with my contact information.

i decided to stay home tonight. Sitting in the dark, .NET installing in the background, my cat [mona] sleeping to my right, and my favorite movie playing. From the same person who brought us the 'The Brave Little Toaster' is also the person behind my most beloved flick. 'Playing by Heart' by Willard Carroll never had a good publicist, but it has a fantastic script and a star cast. And oddly enough it requires a larger vocabulary than most films, kind of refreshing actually.

My love of the Vodka Martini began here. Vox and Dirty.

I even ventured to the Mayan in L.A. once when I was in town for a tradeshow.

I always find and lose the soundtrack mp3s.

The notes of the closing song last forever, so pure.

I always mean to read 'Good Night, Moon' -- but never get around to it.

After each viewing, which never get old, I go into a Jazz kick.

I watch it when I feel alone.

For the past few days, my roommate [distant girlfriend] has been vocally disgusted with my 'sickness' or more to the point, my failure to be well. What she speaks of is of course my allergies, which I would gladly give up should the opportunity arise. However I can't and the doctors' advice offers no charity. I know my medications like no other, but they don't appear to know my aliments or me that well. Again the roommate insists that I am doing nothing to remedy my miserable ness, and I just need to 'fix it', she is tired of my condition.

This burns me up for several reasons.

( Read more... )

I am left here pondering if my persistence to help her and make this relationship work has turned to an obstinate, severe beating of a dead horse. This is mental anguish on top of my physical suffering... I just don't know anymore.


Just don't know what to do right now.

I spent my first leg of significant time outside the country in St. Kitts, W.I. Joe and I met my friend John down there and we stayed at Malcom's villa which overlooked half moon bay. It was incredible, we went scuba diving (100 reefs and probably that many wrecks too), drank local rums, enjoyed the ocean breeze -- I forgot where I was and lost all sense of time. We spent 16 days on that island, and then a few in puerto rico.

But now I am back. John called it "re-entry sickness" and I can't think of a better description myself. My regained desert allergies don't help matters much either. I could breathe on the ocean, but in Utah I am back up to my clogged self. I feel as if I should have stayed at the bottom of the ocean.

i am graduating, finally. with honors no less in software engineering. i highly recommend taking a few years off after high school.

what are my plans now?

i am taking a year off to finish a few projects, that will hopefully, in one way or another, fund my way through grad school. i also intend to play hard, as the last few years have been spent working hard. i am currently looking into MBA programs here in the salt lake valley.

Joellyn, my girlfriend, is graduating with honors in head shrinking. She has already been offered a part time job with full benefits at a retirement home, while she finished her graduate degree in social work.

forgiveness: acknowledging that something or someone has been done wrong, while ignoring the way in which it was in error and releasing no negative consequences for the person or thing that is in error.

"it's ok" [ now proceed as if nothing ever happened ]

I was can't say I was really a fan, but I truly like Johnny Cash's Hurt Video

i can't help myself, i love to chew on little balls! I am sure rare would be proud. seriously, they must have crack in them damn smoothies. so good.

http://www.lollicup.com/

livejournal, at least to me, is a place where i go when i don't feel like i have anyone else to turn to. entries inspired by loneliness, and the false notion that i am not alone.

joe, my girlfriend, is the reason that i haven't posted for a long time. she took the place of this dumping ground for emotional scrawlings. but now i don't seem to have a place like that.

she wants to buy a house, a decison that is less than a month old and a point of contention between us. i make only enough to get buy, ensuring time for my school work, so i don't lose my full ride. she has a part time job. so she (or we) can't afford a house on our own until those things change. but now her parents are willing to co-sign something that the credit reports have accurately stated we can't afford on our own. worst yet, the house she has her heart set on would require 2-3 roommates to just make the mortgage payments.

so do i move into this house, which has no place for the messy material things that i love, tools, bicycles, etc. there is a finished basement, no garage, and every room is carpeted. her response to this of course is that i can just keep things in a (crummy & insecure) shed, to rust and rot away in the off chance it isn't stolen.

this house is nice, not much work needed, and in an up and coming neighborhood (a tad sketchy now, but a good investment).

so i am left with this decision, do i stay with joe?

i can't afford the damn place, and while she says that that is her problem, and that i only need to pay what i pay now, i know better. i actually want to share that burden, just not at this point in my life. but i want to stay with her.

...further contact info? or did i somehow miss the point?

"NEW YORK (Reuters) - A lawyer was arrested late Monday and charged with trespassing at a public mall in the state of New York after refusing to take off a T-shirt advocating peace that he had just purchased at the mall.

According to the criminal complaint filed on Monday, Stephen Downs was wearing a T-shirt bearing the words "Give Peace A Chance" that he had just purchased from a vendor inside the Crossgates Mall in Guilderland, New York, near Albany. "I was in the food court with my son when I was confronted by two security guards and ordered to either take off the T-shirt or leave the mall," said Downs.

When Downs refused the security officers' orders, police from the town of Guilderland were called and he was arrested and taken away in handcuffs, charged with trespassing "in that he knowingly enter(ed) or remain(ed) unlawfully upon premises," the complaint read.

Downs said police tried to convince him he was wrong in his actions by refusing to remove the T-shirt because the mall "was like a private house and that I was acting poorly. "I told them the analogy was not good and I was then hauled off to night court where I was arraigned after pleading not guilty and released on my own recognizance," Downs told Reuters in a telephone interview.

Downs is the director of the Albany Office of the state Commission on Judicial Conduct, which investigates complaints of misconduct against judges and can admonish, censure or remove judges found to have engaged in misconduct.

Calls to the Guilderland police and district attorney, Anthony Cardona and to officials at the mall were not returned for comment.

Downs is due back in court for a hearing on March 17.
He could face up to a year in prison if convicted."

here is a shot of me and my motorcycle for the airheads newsletter.

i like her

sometimes i don't need a jacket.
even when the temperature outside can crystallize falling tears.
i still don't feel the need for one.

cold is the absence of heat and everything is relative.
i still don't need one.
on the inside i have grown colder than the frigid air.
if i had a jacket i would offer it to those around me.
in fear they feel the coldness coming from me.

jackets keep the cold out, but what if it is already in?

toad

As a youth I thought I was clever thinking of "Clowns wear makeup so people will laugh at them, why do women?" But I think I like the "self-esteem in a bottle" bit more.

i hate doctors with cookie cutter answers.

finally someone is protesting the big bully.

probably