|
|
Saturday, March 22nd, 2003
| |
9:41 am
|
|
| Sunday, March 16th, 2003
| |
9:51 pm
|
I am going to start this off by saying that my fucking turtle ran away. I came home from the rodeo to find his bowl empty and poured out the water, so I could search frantically under the rocks. I plucked everything off my floor and threw it on my bed, searched everywhere. And do you know where he was? Behind my dresser! That little punk, and I swear, he was laughing at me. BASTARD. But damn, he’s so cute. :D
My body my temple,
I like the way I feel.
It feels so right.
Should I thank you now,
Little prayer boy?
current mood:  excited
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| |
2:52 pm
|
My thoughts to Legion's Friday, February 28th, 2003 question...
I would expel the AIDS DR because he's going to die a long, slow painful death anyway, isn't he? Sure he has the knowledge of a DR, but more than likely in this situation the only attention one would need is basic first aid. He isn't trained to look over the whole body like a Veterinarian is, he's more than likely specialized in one particular area such as the heart, intestines, sex organs, or brain. Doctors may get all basic training, but he's is more than likely localized and in this situation it wouldn't do any good. Plus, we don't need him to contaminate the others with his sickening disease. The 50-yr. female laboratory scientist justs because of the fact of her age. Two decades, more than likely she won't make it. She'll die anyway, why let her take up the food? Too bad we can't take the knowledge of her brain and suck it into the thoughts of everyone else. It would be a shame to loose her because of her knowledge, but come on, what plants would be left? Or what plants would be new? undicovered? Something unknown to her knowledge, so what she knows is useless and pointless. She's old, let her die. The girl who is 16 and might be with a child will also have to go. The only reason why is because she might be with a child. If she is and the child grows up, the nine becomes a ten and you are shit out of luck, unless you get rid of five and not four, which isn't really fair. So because she was so smart and got knocked up, let's kick her out. We can only feed ten, not nine. (Stupid pregnant teenager). Let's get rid of the 50-yr. plant lady's husband. More than likely he is the same age and he might be a pain in the ass just because we got rid of his wife. Besides, he was into coke and he might cause a LOT of problems because he's recovering, (forced to recover from his coke) and that would be too much to deal with.
So all in all...
The AIDS
The OLD LADY
and HER OLD MAN
and THE KNOCCKED UP TEEN
as for the cop with the gun, he’s got to sleep sometime and if he gets out of hand, we can tie him up and use him as a sex slave.
What do you think about that, Matt?
Wait? How many girls were there to begin with? Damn, I hope it wasn't only two... if it was, then keep the girl and kill off the black guy - the poet.
current mood:  thoughtful
|
|
(2 comments | comment on this)
|
| |
12:42 pm
|
Just an update, yes I'm still sitting here, but let's ignore that fact. He had one paw, foot, whatever you want to call it sticking out at an angle so that it's underside showed. I touched it in a ticklish manner and he quickly moved it back under his shell! He's ticklish... :D
current mood:  geeky
|
|
(7 comments | comment on this)
|
| |
12:33 pm
|
We are going to set Freeway free, it's not fair to keep him. What a shame because he really is so cute. I adore him. He's so tiny. He fits in the palm of my hand and just stares at me. I made the mistake of letting him lounge on my desk on a washcloth and when I returned after getting a cup of coffee he had decided to embark on a serious exploration that resulted to a frantic search on my part. Luckily I found this little Columbus tucked between the far recesses of my desk, far from China but discovering the hateful realms of dust. Poor guy. He's sitting on my lap.
The way I'm sitting, wrapped only in a fluffy pink robe, is that I'm balanced on my toes so my legs are shaking some, from the caffeine, yes perhaps, but more or less from excitement. My body does that sometimes.
He just started to crawl around. He has one foot out and his head is peeking. I think my shaking leg is making him nervous because he kind of put his head back in his shell so that his nose peeks out. Head in though, he managed to maneuver his body, (so he could look at me?) I don't know. I adore him.
I want to keep him, but 13 pets is too much and besides, he'll be happier outside spreading his seeds and making children that perhaps one day I could see and relish the beauty of in the wild. My leg is shaking more violently now, it's weird.
I have the cord of my robe wrapped too tightly around me, every time I breath I am aware of it. It's a pressure that is almost a comfort. I have to sit with my knees together, also, or the robe will fall open. It's pretty big, and quite long, I had to roll up the sleeves.
My hair is messy, bed hair I guess you could say. I like it this short. I don't have to worry too much about brushing it, unless of course, I want to make an impression. I plan on cutting it again, two inches shorter so that it's just at the tops of my shoulder and I am planning on dying it a reddish color. That should look excellent with my eyes.
I'll feel more Irish.
He's just sitting there, looking. And the cats, lounging on the floor. I have my red lights on, my room is now known as the red light district. Between the two red bulbs above, the lava lamp, and the red wolf sigh, it's no surprise. And the engery of my writing I think, also plays into that feel.
The glow of my computer screen doesn't do much to tarnish the red glow. It's better at night.
I have the silky taste of coffee playing in my mouth. It's quite comforting and delicious. I bought some knee high socks and pretended to be a little school girl, the thought encouraged of course, a delicious little story idea of which I can't possibly share. Well, perhaps once I finish writing it.
If I ever found someone to steal my writing ideas... I'd hate to think that thought, because the person who did it would be so below them. I'd probably really, really dislike them and I don't want to think about that.
I have my toes curled into the carpet, so my leg isn't shaking anymore. I think he'll like that, sitting of my lap as he is. He's so perfect and tiny. I wish I could take a pictures of him there. It would be beautiful with the pink robe, hints of flesh, and the red glow.
I need to get dressed now anyway; I need to fully wake up.
current mood: dorky
|
|
(8 comments | comment on this)
|
| |
1:48 am
|
Sometimes I’d wish myself the sexual brevity that seems to expunge ones mind – mine consumed with, of course, naught other then thoughts of sedate sensuality and unholy incarnate bliss that only an old soul can concur and comprehend. I’ll never know my equal.
Also, such depravity is not the only thing on my mind.
I have a new pet. :D He’s a water turtle that mom and I saved today. I’ve lovingly named him Freeway. We are talking about setting him free, but so far he’s the only guy that hasn’t let me down. That's lame.
It sucks when you think you are lusting, not only for the carnal, but also for the rare mentality that can accept the faucets of mine that drip not only water, but wine and blood and come and gold.
|
|
(6 comments | comment on this)
|
| Saturday, March 15th, 2003
| |
1:07 am
|
a vibrancy snuffed tonight,
again. tarnished in soft pink lipstick,
a minute existence spreads
a slow lingering decay, whispering
a memory as it blew out
a flame, so stark in it's apprehension, that
an unknown retaliation was opening opulent
against the unknown.
and thigh high stockings, silk
against pale thighs part,
a slow awakening,
awakened to him.
a sigh vibrated from
a silky throat, like
a purr deep.
a responsive unfolding of slender limbs,
a cohesive cling
as a reaction unfolded to the caressing touch.
a reaction unheard
as her lips pressed against,
against the place at the corner of his mouth.
again he smiled, possessive flare to his touch,
against her skin he placed his sensuality
as he tarnished the pale into a rose flush.
and his fingers explored,
and her reaction was definite -
a wanton-ish appeal that damned their existence.
current mood: pealed.
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| Friday, March 14th, 2003
| |
12:09 am
|
..
I have this need to touch something with my eyes closed - to explore it's contours with my finger tips and trail them slowly over the texture, like a sexual caress that conforms to my memory each intimate detail. I want to have the comfort of having something wrapped around me and I want to breath in a manly scent, a scent of something that smells of outside and danger. Does that make sense? I just want a mate, I guess you could say.
It's moments like this, when I'm sitting in a dark room, that I think that I want this companion, but I don't need one. I'm strong and independent. I don't need anything and I'm working on acquiring no attachments.
..
|
|
(11 comments | comment on this)
|
| Thursday, March 13th, 2003
| |
11:36 pm
|
I feel sick and utterly disgusted.
I am happy I don't have that filth
in my life any more.
Nasty.
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Sunday, March 9th, 2003
| |
8:57 pm
|
The Split Verdict on Harry Potter
By MINDY SINK
OLORADO SPRINGS — While Harry Potter books remain banned in some places, there is a growing acceptance of the stories of the boy wizard, with a blessing of sorts from the Vatican recently and even new efforts to preach Christianity itself through them.
One such effort is under way here at the Vanguard Church, housed in an old movie theater. The church, whose congregation is Southern Baptist, is presenting a series of workshops, "The Potter Project," intended to teach children about Christianity by play-acting aspects of the Harry Potter stories.
Nearly 200 children twitched with excitement at the church the other day as they watched the Sorting Hat of the Harry Potter books come to life onstage for the first day of the series. But when the hat announced that all the children, mostly second through fifth graders, had been assigned to the Slytherin House, the home of young Harry's archenemy, Draco Malfoy, one of them shouted from the middle of the theater, "I don't want to be evil!"
Adults dressed up as Harry's professors had to stifle laughs.
The idea for the series "came about because Harry Potter is a phenomenon in the world of children," said Tosha Williams, a co-founder of the church.
"We're using Harry Potter as a springboard to teach spiritual truths," Mrs. Williams said, "and using one story to teach them what we believe is the greatest story. We are using the Harry Potter phenomenon almost like a bridge."
The bridge begins as the children line up to enter through Gate 9 3/8 into Diagon Alley and then participate in the Warthogs Extension School — Harry attends Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry — which includes a glow-in-the-dark imitation Quidditch game and the Chamber of Choices. Dressed as characters from the books, adults walk the children through lessons about truth and loving Jesus.
A church volunteer, Chad MacEnulty, plays a "visiting professor" who, dressed in a floor-length red and gold robe, tells the children that everyone has evil traits, like deceitfulness and prejudice, and that this is why they have been consigned to the dark house of Slytherin.
He then refers to the Bible as the way out of Slytherin.
"The mysterious book gives us the key," the professor nearly shouts. "It tells us of Jesus, of the greatest house, the Father's house, where there is peace, happiness and joy."
The children, some dressed in wizard hats and dark robes, applaud.
While the Vanguard Church has fully embraced Harry Potter, Christians elsewhere remain vehemently divided as to whether he fosters occultism or, to the contrary, is an instance of popular culture that can be used to promote their religion.
The American Library Association ranks the Harry Potter books, by the British author J. K. Rowling, as among the most challenged in the country. People in New Mexico publicly burned the books because they believed that the Potter stories taught witchcraft, occultism and Satanism. Others protested outside movie theaters when the books came to the screen.
One critic of the Harry Potter stories is Doug Groothuis, professor of philosophy at the interdenominational, graduate-level Denver Seminary.
"The roots of the Harry Potter books are definitely not Christian," Dr. Groothuis said. "They are not even neutral in the ancient tradition of the occult. Children's imaginations should be treated very carefully and wisely."
Richard Abanes, who has written two books that highlight what he sees as the wrongs of the Harry Potter stories, said: "I suppose you could take anything and make it Christian. Some people want to portray Harry as a Christlike figure and bring up several things he does that they say are noble, courageous and loyal to his friends. They ignore many moments where he is very un-Christian and is blatantly immoral, lying, cheating, deceiving."
The Vatican, however, appears to disagree. Last month the Rev. Don Peter Fleetwood, who had helped draft a Vatican document on New Age phenomena, said the books "aren't serving as a banner for an anti-Christian ideology."
Father Fleetwood, responding to a reporter's question at a news conference on the document, added, "I don't think there's anyone in this room who grew up without fairies, magic and angels in their imaginary world."
Connie Neal has created a cottage industry out of finding the Christian aspects of Harry Potter, having written two books on the subject and produced two related audiotapes and a video.
"You can't escape Harry Potter, because kids love it," Mrs. Neal said. "It takes a lot more energy to forbid them everything permeating the culture. It's so much easier to turn it around and use in a positive way."
Mrs. Neal agrees with critics like Mr. Abanes that people can see what they want in the books.
"People tend to find in books whatever they want to find," she said. "My premise is reductionism. I'm sure if Freud were looking for it, he could find something sexual in it."
Both Mrs. Neal and Mrs. Williams, co-founder of the Vanguard Church, compare the love of Harry's mother to Jesus' love, because she sacrificed her own life as an evil wizard tried to kill the infant Harry.
"Jesus died for me so that I could live," Mrs. Williams said, pointing to "a huge spiritual truth" for the children: "that somebody loves them so much they gave so much."
Certainly parents and children alike are voicing enthusiasm for the Vanguard Church's project.
"I think it's a good way to integrate our beliefs into what the kids are interested in today," said Gina Cottrill, mother of a 6-year-old who has seen the Harry Potter movies. "I like the idea that there is another world you belong to. Like when Harry is living with the Dursleys and he gets to go to this magical place — it's kind of a way to see going to heaven."
|
|
(2 comments | comment on this)
|
| Sunday, March 2nd, 2003
| |
9:35 pm
|
Hi Azeron!
Well, it's interesting the
way that my life is... I
can't wait to see what
tomorrow will bring. :D
I'm really fortunate.
Hey Matt, great to see you again.
Mage is always a wonderful read.
Always, great poems. Told him so
once, I believe. :D
And I adore my cunt girls. :D
It's not that I dislike those of
my past, it's beyond that, it's
deeper... it's just.. i don't care.
Isn't that worse then not liking
someone?
Well, I care for Heather.. but I don't
want to touch those emotions yet,
still too raw.
I miss Jerry. Towards May I'll have
a new addition to my life, I would have
loved to share it with him. :D But hey,
I can share it with Fiind, Trent, and Tal..
Oh! And Scoott.. Maybe Copper... and MITCH.
Yes, mitch. That's the best part. :D
Well, my numbing rants tonight have been
nothing at all... I can't yet express my
thoughts, I will once I move this, which
I am determined to do. :D
|
|
(3 comments | comment on this)
|
| Monday, February 10th, 2003
| |
10:32 pm
|
I love older men.
Men. Not boys.
Men.
But I don't think I'm ready for them yet.
I'll be ready for the right one, though.
...
well, I've met someone that can handle and understand my ways. And he doesn't ... well, I won't be tacky.
See, that's what I mean. I can't say what I really think... that's why I'll have a new location soon.
|
|
(6 comments | comment on this)
|
| |
10:14 pm
|
This goes for all of you DeBakey students, for those that this doesn't apply to, have a great night and nothing personal. :D
keak2003: hey tiffany, i have a question for you
keak2003: pertaining to english
My Blood Burns: Um, sure.
keak2003: so what exactly do we have to turn in for mrs. espree?
My Blood Burns: I wasn't there Friday. Want Eric's sn? I'm sure he could tell you everything you need to know.
My Blood Burns: And then, when ever you have school questions, you could ask him and not me.
keak2003: i'm sorry, i should have remembered you weren't there on friday
My Blood Burns: That's ok.
My Blood Burns: Do you want his sn, or not?
keak2003: i'm one of the ppl that told mrs. epsree you weren't there
keak2003: sure
My Blood Burns: My Blood Burns: Is it ok if I give Kerrick your sn? he needs some help.
BlacklightHaloed: sure
My Blood Burns: That's him.
keak2003: thanks
My Blood Burns: Enjoy. Next time you want to message me, try not to follow your pattern of indulging only into school work. Have a suave night, gent.
keak2003: sorry
My Blood Burns: Don't be Kerrick, just be aware that I don't think it's fair only to continuously message me for homework and nothing else. We've talked about this before.
keak2003: all right
My Blood Burns: So is that all?
keak2003: yes
My Blood Burns: Thought so.
I'm not the selfish one.
I'm not the bitch.
I'm not going to explain myself.
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| |
9:34 pm
|
The only truth that is true is what I know and understand, what I seek to discover and what doesn't blind me. The only truth to me might be hard to face, but there is so much that is undiscovered and there is so much that hasn't been explained, nor will it ever because I simply don't have the energy. I can't write anymore, sometimes it's really hard but mostly it really doesn't seem to mean anything anymore.
Truth: specific memories, untarnished and unblemished by a constant force that now is diminished; a lost scar that has made such a difference in my life, who still is here, who watches over me and watches over him; betrayal - A fault both my own and the others, but you know what? I don't need that energy. I don't need anything.
Here, I can no longer express myself.
I will make some changes,
save some stuff and then it
will be deleted and reborn;
burned and returned.
Oh, and I have a fiance. :D
current mood:  giddy
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| |
9:11 pm
|
I think that I am being
tested in a lot of ways and
it is only a matter of how
I handle it. Learning is
an important task in life
and right now I am discovering
who I am and what it is I
want to do with this
knowledge. There is so much
I want to explore,
touch, taste, know. I want
information and I want
experience -- all in moderation.
I want control and I want precision.
Tomorrow I get to spend two
wonderfully long and
painful hours on a fucking bus.
current mood:  annoyed
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| Sunday, February 9th, 2003
| |
11:09 pm
|
I need to divide my time:
Logically, romantically, realistically.
on a side note:
My Blood Burns: http://www.livejournal.com/talkread.bml?journal=eroticvisions&itemid;=395501#cutid1
Reverend Meta: whee makeup
Reverend Meta: aiee shes not wearing pants
My Blood Burns: :D
I've found a new way of description!
and I dislike girls, they suck.
Reverend Meta: i like how on the livejournals with pictures people that comment seem to always be so positive and supportive
My Blood Burns: Yah, it's great.
Reverend Meta: boy, those boots do look cool with the skirt
My Blood Burns: Yes sir, she's a nice looker.
Reverend Meta: and women look like some sort of animal when you see them from the back without pants
Reverend Meta: like in the first 2 pictures here
Reverend Meta: some sort of animal, ha, what a weird thing to say
Reverend Meta: anyway, i'm going to hit the sack. have a great night, and i will see your pretty face tomorrow you vixen
My Blood Burns: Sweet dreams. :D
current mood: jfgjsldfg
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| |
10:50 pm
|
This weekend was beautifully cathartic and symbolically important towards estranging myself from a shell and cocoon I’ve blissfully indulged. Stress seems almost impatient in her ways of trying to seep into the crack's I've allowed in my molding. She seeks, I believe, to consume me and in the past I’ve fallen victim to her lure. Thursday resulted into a melt down that I've refused to evaluate. I have a deepening sickened feeling sinking like a stone in my stomach. I am nervous and anxious and I want the ability of rebirth. A new start with memory.
Well, I don't know if that's true, in fact I know it's not. I've learned and I'm learning. I need to take baby steps in cleaning out my closet.
Mindless, self spoiled ramble:
Thick red,
on top in coats.
Upon it piles,
consuming
constant.
A blossoming touch
deviates into a much
needed exploration as
a timeless sensation
intensifies into a priceless
gasp, cut short by the sharp
bite on subordinate lip.
Stilled tones subdue the
impatient flush as a
welcoming explanation of
love's deflowering blossom
create a memory that
triggers a response subject
much to a vibrating purr,
deep and throaty.
Head bent, lips full
and wet, hair fallen and
lashes lowered, flushed
cheeks, quivering responses,
pleading leaning intos and
responsive inquisitions.
I want a cool demeanor, a cool response, a knowing brow, and a secretive smile. I want distance, respect, admiration, and I want the ability to have the control of not explaining myself.
I hate being called selfish, spoiled, bratty, bitchy.
Words -- but there is depth, anger, and pain.
I plan on moving this.
"I like climbing trees and throwing water balloons."
I am shifting the degrees concerning the fidelities of aquatints. I find myself condemned to seek out the company of a solitaire sort, a sort of copper peer as of yet, to making me smile, yes. Smile and laugh. Such beautiful feelings and emotions.
She said I fear abandonment,
could it be because
it's an obvious pattern in
my life, what? with me
pushing, pulling, tugging,
putting down... i don't
doubt it.
I like copper.
Copper? Run. I think you are great.
Let’s not rush, but I like
flirting with you. It’s a pleasure
that’s refreshing and intoxicating.
Give me some handcuffs.
vermilion brilliance creams the
subtle marble, smearing
on thick, jagged. It's unbalanced
in it's allure, demanding
as it resides and plops -- plump
like a deceitful starlet tear.
Pathetic in it’s drizzle; it’s
pathetic drawl, it slinks slow
and definite with intent. Staining
and reminding it’s slow to wash away,
lick away, fuck away.
Enough for now, I feel raw.
And you feel tender and so
damn addictive..
current mood:  okay
|
|
(2 comments | comment on this)
|
| Monday, November 25th, 2002
| |
6:31 pm
|
sometimes when i can't see anything
but my own shadow in the midst of
everything and yet nothing i still feel
this lingering undeaniability. sometimes
i feel a little vulnerable and lost and
sometimes i feel hurt.
but then other times, i feel an immense
happiness as is the feeling of now. i was
inspired today by new characters, new stories,
and it's beautiful.
i've found a character i like playing.
i've found someone to play her with.
it's beautiful.
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| Tuesday, November 5th, 2002
| |
11:16 pm
|
|
| Sunday, October 27th, 2002
| |
10:33 pm
|
|
|
|
|
|
distressed