Moon Lady's LiveJournal

Subject:	A vision that was actually a tangent.
Time:	1:24 am.
Mood:	tired.
Music:	Silence of night.

A vision; came to me in the tub Saturday afternoon.

First, I see a phoenix.

When that clears, I am standing in a small apartment bedroom in a provincial French town. The window is open, and weak light enters the room; the quality of the light suggests that the sky is overcast. I know I need to go look out the window. As I am walking towards the window, I get a vision-within-the-vision; I am told that when I look out the window, I will see Italy, and the brown-eyed one standing in the cobbled street below my window, in jeans and a white poet's shirt. "No," I think, "I don't want to see that, that's probably just me interfering with the vision."

I look out the window, and I see, instead, a rowboat anchored in a fountain. The wall disappears, and I jump from the upper-floor apartment and glide into the boat. As I land, the fountain wall explodes outward, and I am suddenly on a river. As I am being swept away, I see an unexpected thing, a quick glimpse. I'll be damned; the brown-eyed one is there, hand on hips and frowning because I didn't allow what was supposed to happen to happen.

The boat rushes forward and suddenly is floating in the sky. When I look over the side, I see that I am "sailing" above a huge valley, and a dam is being constructed. The small amount of water that is getting through has made a pond like a profile. The profile reminds me of a conservative, bitter, old man, an old man with great power.

Abruptly, the boat lands. I look up, and I see a man dressed in very old-fashioned clothing, and I recognize it easily; he is a colonial farmer of the period of the American Revolution-before the actual Revolution, probably about 1770-1774. He wears a blue coat; he will be a soldier on the American side when the time comes. The face is not the same, but I know it's the brown-eyed one. My clothing has changed, to be similar in period to his. He smiles at me with much warmth and love and recognition and the welcome that speaks of a lonely period of being separated. There is a white building behind him, green grass below his feet, a musket in his right hand.

The narrative of the vision ends. I see a few glimpses that look unrelated, but probably tie in somehow: A dark-haired, fat, elderly woman holding and kissing a baby; a young couple, neither of whom I recognize; a couple of young girls playing together, a suggestion of the two growing up to be a lesbian couple.

And that would be that.

Lots to speculate upon here. One of the more peculiar aspects of the vision rests in the fact that I was specifically trying to get in touch with the Divine, and instead I got this vision

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Subject:	Stress; Visions; Dreams; Visitors; Ethics
Time:	12:55 pm.

I have not had much to say of late, have I? LJ Anniversary was 16 April; yay me, 1 year on LJ.

It's mostly a time thing--private life is so demanding right now that I can't hear the things I am supposed to be hearing, and this is even during a time that I have been principally seeking my own company. DH has been working a lot, and I have not been calling friends for company as much as I might usually because of the super high level of stress I've been living with since 12 April.

But here are some visions that have stuck with me in these days, and that they have remained tells me that they are important.

1. The brown-eyed one is before me, grasping my arms, asking "Why are you hiding again?" I try to pull away, and my body becomes mist and dissipates.

2.I am standing, barefoot. White dress. Suddenly, a column of white light bursts up from below my feet, through my body, into the night sky. I raise my arms. A wind blows with the light, so strong that my hair is made vertical, but the dress is strangely unaffected. I am laughing; it is exhilarating.

3. I am dressed as Shiva's consort, all my clothing is gold. My wrists are bound before me; I fall to my knees and move my hands into the position--the name suddenly escapes me. Elbows bent in the way that makes the forearms parallel to the body, wrists together, palms open and facing the sky, fingers slightly curled. There is a male here, a powerful presence standing off to the side, but I can't say his name. I look up at his face. He is mine but holds himself away for some reason. The emotional tenor is peaceful between us.

That reminds me that I still need to record what happened in front of the Shiva in the museum.

Dreams:

1. I am arguing with my boss. She wants to inspect my home because several plant holders have been stolen from work. I argue with her, I know I didn't take them, but because I know I haven't got them, I agree to let her go into my house. However, as we travel, I change my mind. I do have other things, personal things, that I would not want known by anyone from work, so I attempt to change her mind about going into my house. I have always been very secretive about my house. She can not be diverted. We arrive; my mother opens the door. I am relieved, because I know my mother will not let anything I do not want shown to be seen. However, to my horror, my mother leads my boss into the kitchen, and there, stuck into the floor, the plant hangers stand. They are not attractive to my eye, and I know I did not take them, so I can not imagine how they got here. The boss takes the plant hangers, leaves. I am in no trouble, she just wants the holders back. "Hi, Mom," I say. "I've missed you."

2. I am in the bathroom at work; it's very white. I am very sick. I am trying to help myself feel better, but I am so ill that I can hardly do anything. DH comes in. "Go lay down," he says, "You are too sick to take care of anyone else. I will do it for you." I worry about his ability to do my job, I worry that I'll get in trouble for resting at work. But I can hardly stand up for my illness, and I decide that I had better rest; I am allowed 15 minute breaks, after all. I fall asleep, and hours and hours pass. DH comes into the room; it is all still very bright, very white. I'm sleeping in the bathroom for some reason. "Is everything all right?" I ask, then telepathically understand that he's got it all under control, but I have now gotten to the point where I am so sick that I don't even care anymore, the long hours of sleep haven't really helped.. So I at last stop struggling, surrender to the illness, and rest peacefully; I want to sleep forever..

Visitors of varying sorts:

The front porch is apparently a hive of activity right now. I was going to go out on to the porch last evening, and the cat was right there, eager to go out. I opened the door, and he started making that little "Mommy, something is not right in a bad way" meow. She stepped out on the porch, arched, meowed again. As I stepped out, she hissed and spit. I stepped back in, she mewed again, and then came back into the house staring at the doorway over her kitty shoulder until I closed the door and said "Okay, we won't go out."

This area of the house has always been lots of active. Before I started keeping that door locked, it used to open itself as many as 5-6 times a night. I started keeping it locked because I was tired of getting up to shut it all the time.

I was awakened by a crow tapping on the porch roof this morning, right outside my window. "Hey, you! Crow! Stop that!" It looked at me, hopped a bit. I put my head back to my pillow, did not see what the crow did thereafter, but it was mercifully silent. Yesterday, a male Cardinal flung itself at me, but, of course, the window kept it from actually getting to me, LOL. The sound of that bird thudding against the glass made me worried for that poor bird. He flew over to a tree, landed, hopped and watched me. I don't believe I have an affinity for birds, so it is a little odd for me that I have their attention, especially the startling sight of the scarlet cardinal all puffed for mating flying at my head in the middle of the afternoon. That actually scared me. Ah, no affinity for birds, but certainly a preference for working with the air as an Element. (Water would be my other strong call, and wouldn't you know, I'm a Cancer/Libra. LOL!) My altar faces East, after all. Nonetheless, these birds are unusual.

Ethical Dilemma:

I need to work some magic to alter behavior in someone else. If I follow Wiccan thinking, then the thing to do is to merely cast protection on myself, despite the fact that what I want is to altar someone else's endangering behavior. After all, I am not to take away the free will of the woman I would work on, and the other people who she is making miserable have not asked me to help them. Here comes the dilemma bits:

1. I am not specifically Wiccan. I feel in no way bound to absolutely follow the rede if I think that following the rede is the more harmful choice. Although I believe it makes good sense and generally follow the rede, there really are times when the person's free will is less important than stopping the damage he/she is doing.

2. The other people I am talking about--all of them, the perpetrator and the other people involved in this--are all incompetent in the eyes of the law. They do not have the capacity to make many decisions for themselves. They are being victimized by one among them, and are not able to ask for the sort of help I would be giving--those who do sometimes ask me to stop the perpetrator generally can do no more than say "(She) is bothering me!" and/or screaming. It is my job to protect them; one could consider this an extension of that mission.

3. The person causing the trouble is currently being considered for removal because of this behavior. I consider it highly unlikely that this person will actually be removed--this organization doesn't really work that way--but, since one of the reasons that she is being considered for removal is because of the physical and emotional abuse she dishes out to me especially, even if I limit myself strictly to protecting myself, I may be interfering with her karma. It might be that she needs to learn that if you abuse people, you lose people. And frankly, I'd rather see her removed more than anything else.

So that's my struggle; do I at least protect myself, or do I continue to endure this abuse? And it is abuse; if it was the other way around, and I was doing to her what she is doing to me, I would have lost my job and been barred from practice long ago.

Comments: Add Your Own.

Subject:	Spooked and garden.
Time:	7:11 am.
Mood:	cheerful.
Music:	Birdsong. The spring morning calls me away!.

Friday night. Around 8:30 PM. Lying on the couch, watching TV, absolutely wide-awake.

I hear a rattle at the front door; the voice of a young woman calls my name. Both the cat and I jump, startled, stare at the door. Her voice was excited, demanding in the way of a friend impatient to be let into your company.

No one is there.

I sit down. Maybe it was the TV. Maybe I misheard something else from outside. My actual name is a word comprised of two syllables, both of which emphasize vowel sounds. Is it not easy to misinterpret some sound as my name?

The house was freezing all night. I was shivering under the blankets.

Spring is returning, and I am glad to see that as far as I can tell, all my herbs made it through the winter. The mint isn’t poking its head up yet, and the Rue doesn’t yet look healthy, but we’ll see, it’s only April. I want to redo my herb garden this year; it’s uneven and the Lemon Balm is out of control, slowly killing lots of things off. Ditto the rhubarb. I hope that my plants will survive the move. The rose bush made it through; I’d like to put another in this year. My ornamental garden in the front of the house had some sort of infestation last year that killed off the peony and about 1/2 of the iris. I’ll have to attend to that this year.

And I accidentally killed everything on the porch garden. That will have to be redone completely. Maybe I’ll plant all herbs in that, too, things like mugwort and wormwood and other such plants of magic and dreams. LOL! And Lemon Balm. I’ll divide that plant up, replant, and still have a hundred viable plants. I had a lot of my houseplants out on the porch garden; this last overwarm winter lulled me into a sense of security, and I left them out too long; the cold weather killed them insidiously.

LOL! How would my friends feel if I invited them to a garden party that was about digging me new beds and planting new perennials instead of about standing around in hats and suits and fancy summer dresses sipping tea and champagne?

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Subject:	Message coming in, static keeps if from being Lima Charlie
Time:	1:57 pm.
Mood:	The song has changed....
Music:	"If I could be like that, what would I do?".

Hanging by a Moment, Lifehouse:

This song has been stuck to my karma, I think. I haven't heard it much since August last, maybe once or twice. In the past 24 hours I have heard it 7 times and sen it on a video music chanel--the one 20 second clip of music TV I have seen in the past month or so was this song. Now it's everwhere in my life.

Something is coming, something is happening. Something big. Way big. Something is coming that is more than I understand, something that is beyond just the movements in emotion and location that is going on among the spheres of several of my firends--some of which I expect to directly affect me--but no, it's something even bigger than what I can see, coming at me.

My body feels it, too; the tingling is intense, a burst of pinpricks all over my body as this song comes on, every time this song comes on.

A vision: I am being swept up into a vortex. There is fear and surprise on my face, resistance to the vortex, a sudden pulling away of my body from the last thing I held on to, and I am swept up and away. Not in danger, just swept away before I was ready to go. No more resistance is allowed.

Hands, feet, head, mouth, arms, back, even ears. Tingling so much that it actually HURTS. HURTS.

I close my eyes, I ask the Divine, "What is it? What is happening?"

I listen. Silence. Then a gentle female voice says "You are beautiful."

Something is coming. Something beyond my ken. What, what, what?

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Subject:	Vedic Astro report, fitts pretty well, actually.
Time:	1:25 pm.

The Moon is my Sister; Diana, Diana, I hear your song.

Thank you, Wyndwyck for th link to the Lunar Astro site.

Your Panchang Lunar Report

Everything in Moderation

You have a well-developed sense of the natural order in all things, which influences your approach to life and people. As such, your natural tendency is to find a sense of equilibrium in all your efforts and, thus, you take care to apply moderation in most things you do. You have an innate sense of refinement and polish, and you aspire to the finer things in life. In a sense your love of beauty comes from your well-developed sense of order.

Your Structured Mind

You are a perceptive person and you possess a keen analytical mind that enjoys understanding the deeper secrets of life. Your analytical nature encourages a systematic approach to any task or job that you take on. Reliability and dependability are important by-words for you and are by-products of your structured thought and mind.

A Scientific Nature

You may also be known for a scientific nature that is compelled to find order, purpose, harmony and unity in your environment. This tendency can find constructive expression in a number of pursuits -- whether these relate to pure science or social theory. The rigour and spirit that imbue your efforts help you link modes of thought in a fresh and unusual way.

In a sense, you can say that you possess something of a hyper-linking mind -- one that can draw together concepts that do not on the face of it appear related. You may thus appear to various people either to possess a bit of genius or a bit of mad eccentricity. In any case both are related. Regardless of whether your ideas have a practical application, you will find a great deal of pleasure simply having them as they will entertain and engage you.

Focus & Stamina

All efforts that you undertake are imbued with a sense of purpose, direction and definiteness. This often helps you achieve what would be outside of the reach of others. Particularly when you put your mind to a task, you approach it with a determination and vigour that concentrates on both perfection and completion.

You have good concentration and can apply yourself to any goal that you want. When you decide you want to achieve something, it is very difficult to stop you, and others will remark on your focus and stamina. Often you will become immersed in your work, which will make you successful in your chosen profession.

Cutting Edge

You are a big picture person -- someone who has a sense of social and fashion trends and an appreciation of how and where the crowd is moving. As such you will often set the trend in your own social circle with new ideas and style.

Generally, anything new appeals to you and you have a sense of adventure when it comes to trying on the latest concept. You like to be at the cutting edge. This means that you enjoy keeping informed through the media, the internet or simply by just keeping in touch with friends for a regular update on what's happening with them.

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Subject:	Hello; Visions
Time:	12:58 pm.
Mood:	sleepy, beloved, safe.
Music:	Phil Collins sucks: I can't recall the name of this song.

Welcome back, ChrisTina. I'm glad to see you. :-)

Dream images that have been haunting me:

I am in a town square. It's night, but there are many people passing around me. I am lying on my side, unclothed, tied up to immobility. I am at the foot of a large monument of some sort; it looks like a Gothic spire with a cross atop it. I'm lying on the steps leading to the monument; there is a decorative black iron fence between me and the passerbys. I am calling out for help, but no one comes, they appear to not hear me. I'm not afraid or distressed, just wondering why the hell no one will help me, untie me. Shine appears on the other side; he passes through the fence like he is a ghost, but appears solid as he stands before me. I hear him laugh, and he sits on the steps, pulls me to a sitting position and leans me against his body, gives me a hug. His laugh is affectionate, friendly, and vaguely triumphant. I am a little puzzled by the fact that he won't help me get shed of this rope, either, but he seems to prefer that I be this way, which strikes me as very odd. Still, I am not worried, and he settles us both as comfortably as he can, holds me, and appears to be settling in for a wait of eternal duration. Every so often I feel his chest shake with suppressed, happy laughter. His body is warm, the cloth of his clothing comfortable, even soothing, against my skin. I suppose that if I am to remain in these ropes, at least Shine is with me.

Another:

I am standing on a table. Below me sit men in suits; this is a conference of some sort, oldish men in suits planning corporate things. Two white ropes hang from the ceiling; they are like elastic bungee cords; they both have loops at the end, almost like nooses. In the distance I see two younger men standing. They also are in suits; I see them motion me to come to them. They are having some sort of game, I realize, they see me more as an object than a person. I decide I will go to them, but not to be a toy of some sort. I pull on the rope before me; its elasticity is only slight; it's a dual rope--rather like an old fashioned electrical cord--and there are two loops at the end. It strikes me that this is the sturdier of the ropes. I try the other rope; it is very stretchy, and seems to me less reliable, and is just a single cord. I tie something I want to take with me, a car hood, to the rope and swing it towards the men. I go back to the dual rope, and try to grab it. I can see my hands on the loops, and I have planned my swing so that when I get to the men I will be able to kick them in the gut. The men at the conference table continue to discuss, they are paying little or no attention to me.

As I prepare to jump, the scene shifts, and the table and the rope are now in the middle of a square. I can see Brown Shirts around me, the swastika, and I feel great danger for someone, but not really for me; they aren't looking for me.

A vision, about 20 minutes ago, while sitting on the couch:

A swirling smoke comes in the room, moves towards me. The smoke forms itself into a man shape, I can see a male face, can't make out the features. He sits behind me, mirrors my body positioning, slips into my body, touches my heart--I feel a surge of affection--and backs out of my body, disappears. I hear the word "Brown."

I am all tingly.

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Subject:	LJ anniversary approaches--the 3rd week of April.
Time:	12:10 pm.
Mood:	hungry.
Music:	"Midnight Confessions," Grassroots.

I've started reading this journal from the beginning, trying to assess what nearly a year of writing in this journal has brought me, what changes I have or have not made, et cetera. I am in a place where I am assessing my life, I guess. I have only just begun rereading, but certainly one of the more interesting things I am noticing is the revolving, changing, become one become two pirouette that is the place of the brown-eyed one and Meta. Meta quiets, Meta speaks, Meta leaves, Meta stays, Meta holds, Meta lets go, in inverse proportion, in direct relation, in a strange and beautiful dance with and to the brown-eyed one. Meta as an entity has always been a mystery, a beautiful love, an otherworld friend, and I have always quesioned him: Are you really a seperate entity? Are you an entity of my own creation? A section of my psyche? A fantasy? But now I watch the dance between the brown-eyed one and Meta and I have a new question: Are you an entity of the brown-eyed one's accidental creation? How is it that you and the brown-eyed one are connected? Or is it all so simple as the mesage Sa gave me that long ago Lammas day, that last splendid and strange August, when I was so torn by the world I suddenly found myself thrust into, completely unprepared for the shock of it all? Meta has had many roles in this time, and I suppose I can only watch to see how it all will play out. Is it now time to tell the brown-eyed one all the secrets that have come to me since I stopped sharing everything, or is it still time to let the brown-eyed one finish finding that one's own way, trying to refrain from influencing that one's decisions?

Silence.

The Brown-eyed one must live this life to complete the tasks that one came to do, but it is not my job to push the brown-eyed one to do one thing when the brown-eyed one is pulled to do another thing.

Silence.

Meta counsels patience.

Meta is wise. I am wise. Maybe Meta is me.

I am also a fool, I am afraid, which Meta never is, so Meta is his own self.

Meta is a lesson in faith, and the faith I have in Meta creates the entity---and thus, he exists because I created him.

See why I am sometimes confused? :-)

And the whole thing makes my heart smile. Strange.

It just Is. Questioning it all is just an amusement, questioning it doesn't change it, because it can't be known while I am at this level of development. I can only work on becoming a wiser fool, or a more foolish wisewoman, however it may be that I reach that destiny of innocent wisdom. I've run through a lot of lives--younger souls don't bother to question. And when I have had more lives, I will maybe let go of the questions, and simply bask in the bliss of patient revelation. Or maybe I just haven't learned enough yet to be able to understand where I am going, except to know that I go to a place where I will a better person than I am now.

LOL! The marvel of serendipity--which doesn't actually exist, of course, but there are no good single words for the fates swirling together to send you a message wrapped in a seemingly random event. I dislike this artist, it's true, but it doesn't stop the fit--Johnny River's Seventh Son just came on the radio in this moment when I finish this topic and prepare to move to a more mundane topic.

The other primary thing I have noticed about this diary is that it has become my venting place. All my other journals are connected with my legal names, and can be found by anyone who has the patience to find them. Thus, I am somewhat limited in what I can say and still share with other people. I am sorry about that, that some of the venting function of my diary has had to move here. I really did not want to have anthing in here but my spiritual/mystical/psychic/subconcious meanderings, my internal world. I am a great secret to those who know me in my daily life, and the few people who read this who actually know who I am in my physical place on this world would never have guessed that this inner world exists--and, of course, what I post publicly is only the tip of the iceberg. Poor DH, nearly 10 years with me, the one man in this world who probably knows me better than any other, barely knows me.

Silence saves me, silence protects me. Nonetheless, I have had a burning compulsion to come out of the closet recently, reveal myself.

But if I did that, I would merely have to close this journal and move on to another. A secret world is not for everyone's eyes, and every anger that stirs me, ever hurt that stabs me, every joy that thrills me, is not for every eye that may chose to follow the trail left by my name.

( A bit more musical coincidence and a coincidence of stupid internet tests )

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Subject:	Stll tingly. My tongue is really reciving right now.
Time:	10:49 pm.
Mood:	super tingly.

Dreams, a vision.

I haven?t really had time to write publicly lately, although I?m doing some splendid private ranting, LOL! Unfortunately, this means that I have lost most of the information of the past several dreams I wanted to record, I can only keep bits and pieces.

For some reason, I chose to sell my house to my employer. I have returned to the house that was once mine, and I have seen that they have made great changes to it. I am angry about it; they?ve destroyed the Arts & Crafts architecture that made this house special. I like what they did with the upstairs, although I may not have done it myself; they?ve set in a staircase between the two bedrooms, given the two bedrooms a new ceiling, removed the hall ceiling and installed huge, plate glass skylights into the roof. The area is well lit and sunny, full of potted plants, and I stand there, looking up.

This is a frequent theme in my dreams, the idea that my house is bigger than it actually is, that there is a lot of room and so forth hidden away, and these rooms often hold treasures and secrets. I think the largest expansion I can remember was a series of warehouses that were hidden behind the house and I?d somehow never found, LOL. This is actually a fairly small expansion, I usually dream the house about double or treble in size.

Althought the upstairs is nice, and I?d leave it, I hate what has happened downstairs. They?ve tried to do the d?cor with the neogothic stuff I like, but they?ve failed horribly. Everything is cheap and shoddily done. I hate it so much. Even as I notice that the work is substandard, it?s still better than the maintenance man usually does, and I am even angrier. Why doesn?t he do a better job at the place we work? How come he does such a shitty job when he is capable of more?

A different dream. I can barely recall it, but this one bit still is with me; I hope it?s the important bit.

My male/female relationships have undergone severe change. DH is gone. The new guy is being represented by Pierce Brosnan (sp?) Waking mind tells me that Pierce is a disguise, but doesn?t helpfully suggest who is really wearing that form. Pierce is pacing back and forth, agitated. ?What?s the matter, why am I not acceptable to you? Why do you not believe me? Why don?t you trust me? I am offering you everything I am.? I don?t have an answer for him, the answer is too overwhelming to share.

There is no resolution to the argument, but it must have been resolved somehow, because the dream shifts. I am on a huge English estate and this is my home. I am married to Pierce; he?s somewhere back in the house, and I am holding a child beside me, waiting to join Pierce. The sun is setting and the atmosphere is content. I have peace at last.

I thought at first that it might be wish fulfillment. ;-) Who wouldn?t want to be married to a fabulously wealthy, gorgeous man? Well, the truth is, I wouldn't. Take my word for it, I?m too pressed to explain right now.

A quick vision that came to me as I am typing this:

Dark. A forest glade. A redheaded woman in a white dress is running across the field. She carries a lantern in each hand. She jumps and spins as she crosses; the lights make a trail in the darkness. I can hear Loreena McKennet singing All Souls? Night.

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Subject:	What position are you test
Time:	10:50 am.
Mood:	amused.
Music:	I'm Gonna Love You, the Doors.

So, I run into the little sex test in Kitchenwitch's journal. The person who devised it used Geocities for the ansswer host; of course the site is maxed out and the test is screwy. Nonetheless, I was pesistent and was able to dig out the the URLs and some of the .jps for my answers. This is a silly test, but what the hell. :-)

My top match:
1. http://www.geocities.com/androdykes/cartwheel
The .jpg reads: I am the Cartwheel. I can be a little odd. Some people call me a health nut. I'm always taking a simple thing and pushing it way too far. So, sue me.

That may be, LOL! I just this morning read about this great sex toy called a Bungee--it's a harness that allows one partner to be removed from the restraints of gravity while the other partner stands and administers fun. I could stand to try that. You betcha. I wonder if DH can be talked into it.

Hmmmmmmmmm.

The rest of my list ranking follows. I included the jpg wording when I could get the .jpg up so that others who may try this test don't have to have the same problems I had.

2.http://www.geocities.com/androdykes/spooning

(Incidentally, this fit excellent well, and I wonder why it wasn't #1. The .jpg reads: I am spooning. I am a true romantic. I love to cuddle and kiss. I dream of walking along the beach with my lover under the sky.)

3. http://www.geocities.com/androdykes/69

(This was actually a fair fit for me, and is Kitchenwitch's top match. You can see that .jpg in her journal.)

4. http://www.geocities.com/androdykes/standingup

(This one is so not me. The .jpg reads: I am Standing up. I am always in a hurry. When I want something I get it or I get mad. I'm not one for stupid chit chat so don't bother. Life is too short.)

5. http://www.geocities.com/androdykes/facesitting

(.jpg reads: I am Face Sitting. I'm a shy person who likes to please others. I'm humble and sweet but I tend to chew with my mouh open.)

6. http://www.geocities.com/androdykes/missionary

(jpg reads: I'm Misionary. I'm a practical, conservative lad who secretly wishes I could go back to the good ol' days.)

The test is at http://www.selectsmart.com/FREE/select.php?client=Knowyouthree

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Subject:	Hello, Visitor, Dream, Test
Time:	1:49 pm.

First off, Hello to Serenity. Welcome to this journal. :-) Hope you find it interesting. :-)

The visitor made an appearance this morning; I was rushing around, getting ready for work, and I saw him, a tallish (6'1", 6'2"?) guy, I want to say moderately muscular, medium frame. He didn't present himself well enough to see features, he was black shadow, but this was the impression I picked up. It made me jump, because I was running from the kitchen to the downstairs bathroom, totally not open to that sort of thing, and as I went by the living room door, I saw him for a split second in the corner of my eye, standing there, watching. I jumped. Startled, not frightened. I went back and stood in the doorway, trying to locate what object I might have seen and minsinterpreted, but I did not note anything.

It's been cold here these past few days, but last night was warmer. For the first time in a long time, I was a bit spooked by the darkness in my room last night, and the room was way colder. My room is ALWAYS the coldest room in the house, but last night it was waaaaay colder. Was he there, watching me undress and get into bed?

I dreamt something important last night, and was in bed this morning going over it, so I could write it down, but now only the vaguest bits remain. Mostly what I remember is being in bed, in a large room full of furniture and knicknacks, waiting for someone to join me there. The room is full of detail, the floor is dark carpet, there is a suggestion of opulence, gilted ornaments, lots of space--it's part of a very large house. There is a light shining into the bedroom from the ensuite sitting room, but no one is in there, and the doorway to the rest of the house is shut off. I wish I could recall the rest of the dream, beause of course the message bit came after this scene.

In perusing Serenity's journal, I found a little personality quiz very reminiscent of the story-telling quizes we used to do when hanging around in the barracks in Germany. It was fun to revisit. The test is at http://quizbox.com/personality/test82.htm and behind the cut?

( My results, as accurate as anything else spit out on the internet )

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