you drive me crazy
you make me mad
sometimes my heart skips
sometimes i feel sad

each moment we take
is currency no longer kept
each kiss is tender
that we willing spent

i see my life
as it unfolds
i see us together
growing old

i am your hero
your knight
your prince

you are my angel
my baby
my princess


despite the defense
i stand tall
i hold your hand
and try to climb the wall

together we will make it
together we will win
i believe it completely
i feel it within.

that was quick. back to being single.

how many times have i done this dance?

edt: in less than 24 hours, things are back. hopefully for good. *crosses fingers*

i close my eyes
and you are there
each moment spent
with nothing to fear

out of the blue
life shines its rays
a new beginning
the start of many days

my heart beats true
each moment, each day
butterflies fluttering
thoughts of you

together we move
forward we go
breaking new ground
forging something new

each day more
feelings grow
our bond stronger
together, me and you.

in my heart
you will always be
my feelings for you
your feelings for me

i know you are all tired of seeing freeipod and such links... but to help a few of my friends out, here are some links to friends of mine that are working on a free ipod.

1 - JS Free Ipod
2 - EK Free Ipod

So yeah, if you haven't signed up, feel free to help them out.

who wants to hump?

( anybody? )

some of you should get a kick out of that.

btw, this is a one time offer (well, the general offer to hump.. we would of course hump multiple times). any of you poke fun at me, and no humping for you.

sweet smiles
speaking of innocence lost
delicate lines
misplaced hearts

from one glance
i knew something more
your eyes spoke words
and tales of lore

i smiled just once
enough for you to see
no words spoken
not between you and me

i wait for the chance
to call you mine
i wait for our bodies
and our hearts to intertwine

i see the chance
just give it some time
one day i will be yours
and you will be mine

once the moon passed
the darkness slid through the heavy sky
trying to find something to grab hold
tearing through its hands
the burns settle like thorns
burying themselves with deep disdain
holding strong
like a silken thread
i grasp
for the life i want
for the dream that slides effortlessly by

i cry as i am forced to let go
releasing myself from the bindings
my own tether
this dream was not meant to be had
the scars
the burns
they are each their own tomb
holding the live and the dead

i settle in slumber
silently waiting for the sun to rise
to bask with renewed vigor
i see nothing that opens my eyes

in the end
i wake up
only to die

Dating is such a peculiar act. You meet someone, talk to them, figure out if there is chemistry.. similar interests... things like that. You size up your interest, decide what you want to do about it, and then see if they concur. All in all, it is an odd notion.

So, with being in the dating pool again, I have realized a few things. One, I am old-fashioned. I do the opening doors thing. The standing up when they come back or leave the table. The paying for the meal thing... etc etc. Apparently some of the things I do are not normal these days. Guys don't stand up when a girl gets up to use the bathroom, as an example. While I don't do it all the time, I try to make the extra effort. It is an old time respect thing.

I am old-fashioned when it comes to my mindset as well. I don't like dating around. I don't like having random sex. I like there to be feelings attached. I like to know the person. I like to feel like there is a future. Apparently, that is also not common.

I also came quickly to realize that I don't know the "rules" of dating anymore. What is okay, what isn't. When one is supposed to call, when one isn't. Things like that. The weird part, I think that in the end, I don't like rules. I don't propose anarchy for dating, but if I like someone, then I want to be able to call them the next day. If I want to hold hands with that person, and it seems right, then by all means I should be able to hold hands or hug or kiss (assuming they are willing). There are funny rules though. Like, you can't kiss on the first date. You can't have sex on the first date either. Which, hey, I am perfectly fine with... you know, because I would like to know the person. :) However, some of the other rules are silly. Like the 3 day rule. Screw 3 days. :)

I am a guy, and when I watch sappy romantic scenes in movies... I get all sappy as well. That's okay. I can admit it. At the end of the comedy American Pie 3, during the dance of the wedding, I could think nothing other than... "I wish I had someone to dance with like that. I want to make someone that happy." In Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, I couldn't help but have renewed faith in things working out in the end. I couldn't help but wish that someone would take me with all my faults and still love me for who I am. That in the end, together we would work things out and that love would conquer all. Maybe it will.

We have to get over the first hump and find that special someone though. So, I vote that we stage a coup d'etat. No, not on the government.. on the rules of dating. Let's change the policy. Let's give each other a chance to find that sappy movie scene ending. Let's accept each other for our faults, for our differences. Let's treat each other with respect and love and let's not let anyone else tell us how we should do that.

So, guys if you want to, get the doors for ladies. Pull out their chairs. Buy them dinner. Stand up from the table when they get up to go to the bathroom. Listen to what they have to say, and actually be interested and talk back. Give them a hug or a kiss if it feels right, don't try to cop a feel. Tell them you are going to call them tomorrow, and then actually do it. Tell her what you think or how you feel, you don't have to be a manly man with no feelings... playing it "cool". Give her the chance to start fresh with you and feel okay doing so. She may let you stay around.

Ladies, if you can, give us guys a break. Don't punish us for all the past guys you dated. Don't measure us up and compare us to other prospects. Go with the flow, if you like us, let us know... it is okay to say what you think and how you feel. If you like us, re-arrange things and make time to see us again. I know we are all busy, but what in life is ever more important than love (or potential for it)? I know for the ladies you fend off guys' advances all the time. That you have to be picky and screen. Let your guard down though, there are good guys out there that are waiting to make you swoon.

Or, am I alone on this? I am taking the first step, you are welcome to follow.

I am in possession of my new ipod from freeipods.com

despite ups being dumb... hahah.

anyway. yay 20 gigs of music.

quick picture, don't mind the webcam.. it sucks.

( wanna see the ipod? )

if you could do anything you wanted with me, what would you do? be honest.