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LiveJournal for Yesterday's Confetti.
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Thursday, November 4th, 2004 |
[10 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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From this day forward.![]() Comment. Whatever. You know what to do. |
Tuesday, November 2nd, 2004 |
[20 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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Currently I am sitting here with a frozen bag of cranberries slapped to my face, The mother said this would be better because they are softer than blocks of ice. I am the pinnacle of jokes with the family. Mother: Why don't you open the door and scare all the little children wanting candy... Broken Erin: OK! and then I'll tell them it's from my mother beating me. Halloween day was pretty much a bust, Due to broken face, And a low confidence in the human race as a whole. Swelling has decreased momentously. But the smiling still hurts :( When the hell's the last time you saw a GIRL with a black eye? NEVER! I look amazing. Actually, this purple my face is turning would make quiet the nice eye shadow pigment. To avoid a mountain of stares and whispers at the school house, I pasted on about one tablespoon of liquid foundation on the beaut. The purple mixed with it and turned it kinda green, So I decided to balance it out I would wear green eyeshadow. My face looked like someone sneezed on me, And I didn't bother to whip their boogers off me. AMAZING. The best was sitting beside a kid who also had a black eye in my Deviance class. Guess it was a bad weekend not only for me... Due to popular request... ( The face that launched 1000 shits ) |
Sunday, October 31st, 2004 |
[15 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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In between the time change. In between the Halloween costumes. In between the bars being open an extra hour. In between the drained bottles. The cigarette buts. The new acquaintances. The wine glasses. The dancing. The laughing. The loving.... Someone wasn’t loving us that much. Someone decided to give me a fucking black eye. ( I LOVE WHITE TRASH! OH YES I DO! ) |
Thursday, October 28th, 2004 |
[17 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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![]() Got some new ink. Due to most amazing mail surprise on Tuesday afternoon. THANKS EMILY. You are my favourite. There was this kid on the bus the otherday... You could tell that this kid was one of those brats, That has total control of the mother, & would probably be one of those lil hooligans that tear up the toy aisle of my store, With the parents no where to be found. Probably in an entirely different store. Anyhow, this kid is driving me crazy, & her restless body is starting to make ME even feel anxious. Until he starts reciting the words "Happy Halloween!" to everyone who passes on the bus. Suddenly, I found myself loving this kid. Maybe she wasn't such a brat afterall... If I had a choice to have sex with any book, Lullaby by Chuck Palahniuk would most definatly be it. It's one of those books you actually feel depressed after because it was just that damn good, And you don't want it to be done. I can not wait to read Fight Club. I've never been this excited over reading before. OH THE THRILL. I saw this X rated hypnotist at Carleton yesterday. Clothes flying everywhere. So much bare skin. So much genetal grabbing. This is what passes for entertainment these days. I realised that it couldn't be that difficult to hypnotize someone. Really, the hypnotic state you are in is the same state you are in when you sleep walk. Not awake. But not completely asleep. It is this same lucid state. But in this case there is a puppet master; Telling you that the chair you are sitting on is your dog. And you should hump it. Change position. Hump. Who needs mescaline when you have this alternative? ( A tray full of ice cubes is melting beside me. With every passing minute. ) |
Monday, October 25th, 2004 |
[23 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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My dreams last night consisted of me having sex wit at least 3 different people, That I can remember. WHAT THE HELL. Sunday bloody Sunday I woke up to a shinny new glass on my bedside table from le bar. When I move out I will have the most diverse set of cutlery/plates/cups/salt & pepper shakers, All taken from drunken nights at various establishments. I have a midterm in about 4 hours and am still continuing to avoid studying, Because I do it oh so well. I keep saying "Later. Later. Later." Winging exams, and getting back decent grades make you feel like superman/Stephen Hawking/Ken Jennings. Sadly, I don't think it will be the case this time. It's a silly time to learn to swim when you start to drown. |
Saturday, October 23rd, 2004 |
[12 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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What is with Halloween sized chocolate bars/chips getting increasingly smaller year by year. I counted a whole 7 chips in my chip bag, And 6 Glossettes in the package today. I remember back in the day when Halloween knew what was up & the chip bags were the size of our present day vending machine size, Which have been getting smaller by the minute as well. The days after Halloween are supposed to be filled with 3000+ calories, And stuffing as much sugar in your mouth until you feel sick, Waiting 5 minutes, Then having a second wind. Frankly, I think the kids of today are getting jipped. I think if I was living on my own and my computer broke, I would probably just buy a whole new one together, Rather than getting it fixed. Just like that time I lost my Tv remote in my room, & didn't even bother looking for it, But went out of my way to go to WalMart to get a whole new one. I am the last person in the world who has not seen Napoleon Dynamite. I keep putting off midterms and assignments, In the favour of vodka, wine and cigarettes. ...Might as well just sell my soul to the devil. |
Thursday, October 21st, 2004 |
[12 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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I had this dream the fam went to Europe and they had this Bulk Barn there were they sold salt water taffy candies with weed laced in them. Me and the mother were flipping out trying to figure out a way to get passed customs with these beauts. Then I fell down a hole. Then the mother prepared me dinner, Which consisted of a block of seasoned butter. So exam dates got announced. SOCI 2003D DECEMBER 20 14:00. For those un-geniouses out there, that would be the day preceding my date of birth. BIGGEST LOAD OF BS EVER. I've noticed an inverse relationship taking place in my life; The more I drink on school nights, the less class I end up attending. I'm a brick and I'm drowning slowly... In an ocean of vodka. Beef: Since when the hell did Toonie Tuesdays become Toonie and 75 cent Tuesdays? Moneen show was ridic great, Except for jerky violent children. Ears are shot to hell today but whatevs. Today I had the best bus flirting session ever. Sideways glaces. Casual smiles. Butterflies galore! HALLOWEEN IN 10 DAYS. HOLY SHIT. ![]() |
Tuesday, October 19th, 2004 |
[11 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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The fam is finally investing in a new computer, & joining the masses of 21st century living by purchasing a system that has more than 16 megabytes of ram. It is going to be quiet the excitement when I can be able to go on MSN again, & write school reports on something other than fucking Notepad. It has been a good 11 year run with you, ol' slowy; I remember back in the days of DOS where I would play pixlated games on you with their monochrome colors and annoying beeps for music; I watched you grow up from one MB to two, to four and then the big puberty jump to 16; I remember the excitement when you got plastic surgery and came home with the new wave CD drive; And how can I forget that time your monitor started to make funny loud noises and called it quits smack dab in the middle of writing an essay. BYE BYE! The household is out of sugar. And consequentially has put a stoping halt to the mass production of Halloween cookies. Worst Tuesday ever. The moon will be red on the 27th, apparently. Other than learning about murderers and crazies, This is what important information is given in Sociology lectures. So I was sitting in Psychology Research Methods class today, Much like I do every Tuesday and Thursday morning, When the professor announces that there will be no class on Thursday morning. Without even thinking, my instinct was to loudly whisper-yell "WHATTT?" Causing the whole class, including the professor, to turn in my direction; Upon where I burst into a fit of embarrassed, uncontrollable laughter. The best part is how this is a class that is aired on the television. The prior story somewhat reminded me of the time in SOCI 1000 when Emily said something so ridiculously funny that I instantly burst out into a loud cackle, Making 300 people turn in my direction to see what the hell was going on. To do: Learn how to keep excitement down. |
Friday, October 15th, 2004 |
[13 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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I just realised that this Halloween is going to be even sweeter because it is going to be 25 hours long. Thanks daylight savings. You picked one fine day to celebrate switching up the time on. Okay, so in the past 2 months I have has this slew of people approaching me on the bus/at the Shawarma Deluxe/at the bar etc; Knowing my name and claiming they have met me before at God knows where. I usually reply with the freaked out answer of, "WHAT! WHO THE HELL ARE YOU? I DON'T THINK WE'VE MET REALLY?" Then they give some details and then I usually say, "Hm. Well that does sure sound like something I would do/say/wear." But alas, the memory is still not refreshed as I am standing there still with a big question mark over my head. Memory skills are lacking like no other as of late. And quite frankly it is starting to scare me. So I have this exam tonight 7:30-9, (Who the hell does that! but whatever. Beside the point) And we are allowed to bring in one sheet with anything on it to help us, And basically I fit all my notes on that one sheet. Not to mention this class is the most ridiculous thing in the world, As the hardest possible question would be somewhere along the lines of "What is a hypothesis?" It seriously feels like I am in the dumb class. Or am back in grade 12 religion where the teacher segregated me, Andrea and Phoebe to this table in the corner we coined "the resource table." It's fall days like these that make me want to sing: All the leaves are brown, and the sky is gray... HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARIE-EVE! ( Bitch, please. ) |
Wednesday, October 13th, 2004 |
[7 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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So this dude sits it front of me on the bus, With these typical over sized black pants, And this typical over sized basketball jersey on. But then I notice this not so typical giant tag hanging out of the back of his jersey displaying some company name and $607.00 underneath it. Then I notice him touch the back of his jersey searching for said tag TO MAKE SURE IT WAS SHOWING. What the hell is the point of this? To show you are absolutely ridiculous on two accounts by: a) buying a jersey that is half the price of a Dominican vacation that probably took and a mere $10 and 30 minutes of slave labour to make b) not cutting the tag off to show how amazing you really are. My accomplishment of the day was finally working a photocopier BY MYSELF. All anxiety was told to take a hike and I rocked that fucker so bad. Where's my nobel prize? These women are my heroes: ![]() Pi on a fucking Pie. If today was yesterday: HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOND! |
Monday, October 11th, 2004 |
[13 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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So October is most defiantly the month for drunkios to go out and hurt themselves. Add me too the list. The ol' wrist got an ol' spraining, & the knees a got a ol' scrapping, & the pants got an ol' ripping, FALLING OUT OF A BUS. I'm fucking amazing. The clincher is we hadn't even reached the ol' watering hole yet. You know you've found a winner of a bar when you leave with things like this: ![]() "The Hickster" - armature pro wrestler. The people me and Red continue to meet just keep getting better and better. And by better I mean white trashier. The morning after conversation included piecing together the night, & the realization that I fall entirely too much under the sweet influence. "What the hell you gonna tell the work place?" "I'll just tell them I fell rollerblading or some junk..." "Did you know it's illegal to rollerblade drunk?" "Well makes sense. You're like a hazard on wheels." "Well Red, you're a fucking hazard just walking." Working a cash register/balloon machine/pricing gun was quite the fiasco with only one working hand. I am in love with the people who frequent my store: [01] So it's 11am and time to open the ol' dollar store for a brand new day. (As I am opening the doors) Man: Are you closing or opening? Erin: !!! Umm...we're opening right now. NO ACTUALLY this is an after hours bar and we close up shop at 11 in the fucking morning. [02] Ring a ding ding. Erin: Good after noon, A BUCK OR TWO. Man: um...yeah...is this like the dollar store? Erin: Yep. Man: Oh...So is everything there...like...a dollar? Erin: A BUCK OR TWOOOO. jerk. Unrelated: This god damn world is full of such fucking beautiful people and fucking beautiful things. Sometimes I just wanna make out with everything in existence at the same time. |
Wednesday, October 6th, 2004 |
[13 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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I got back the first (and most defiantly last) test with a perfect score on it today. SHUT UP at the fact that it was a test to see if we could memorize 10 places on the map of Africa. Second test of the year went straight down the gutter. Man this school stuff is kinda hard. I was way better at summer. HI. I'D LIKE TO CHANGE MY MAJOR TO SUMMER ACTIVITIES PLEASE. Speaking of which... THIS IS MY FAREWELL TO SUMMER: ![]() You probably don't get it. Because you probably aren't as fucking awesome as the people who do. I wish someone would just fucking find that God damn hot 89.9 fugitive already. It's probably Jesus. Or Bin Ladden. Or the marshmallow man. Or quite possibly no one at all! Mr. spider decided to pass away on top of my door way. I really wonder why he picked such a spot. Perhaps he was planning on scaring me Miss. Muffet style as I swung open the door one day? Perhaps he was trying to join in on the Halloween decorations that clutter my room? Perhaps he was heading to my bar? I will find out one day; When we are reunited in heaven. I wish we still lived in an age of milkmen. So I can run away with him. And take baths of milk. And milk him for all he's worth. FUCKING ZING. |
Sunday, October 3rd, 2004 |
[17 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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So like it's October. & things are shaping up nicely. Every so often their comes these annual periods of 2 weeks long that just so happen to contain about 25 of my friend's birthdays. We have now entered one of these periods. I guess 9 months ago in the blistering cold of January, there is nothing to do except shovel the driveway and make babies. So here she goes... HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHEENA ! HAPPY BIRTHDAY EVAN ! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TRACEE ! HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAROLYNE ! HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEANA ! HAPPY BIRTHDAY IAIN ! & more to come soon. Yesterday included celebrations for Sheena, Then giant celebrations for Tracee, Carolyne and Leana. Gifts included too many cookies, a Halloween ash tray, an alligator wind chime and a chef wine bottle holder. I think just about everyone there got a) entire drinks spilled on them b) a bloody something c) a bruised something d) bitten. The red cross purse (somewhat) got put to use when tending to bleeding boy due to Leana's flamboyant drunken acts. And by put to use I mean it got to sit next to me as someone (Kassie?) mentioned, "Hey Erin. You finally get to be the nurse to match the purse." Sadly, the only supplies it carries are certainly not medical and strictly Erin tailored. (ie. Dinosaur hole punch, Belmont milds, random stolen things from the bar etc etc etc.) I think I have just joined all of you on the being sick front. THIS RULES! (Ok, not so much) |
Monday, September 27th, 2004 |
[10 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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![]() The Reds love the karaoke, & the karaoke love The Reds. I think we found a replacement for our favourite Eddy Pub: Amigos. Best coke/dinge/white trash bar we have seen in a while. FEELS JUST LIKE HOME. "I think next time we should tone down our jumping around a lil." "Yeah. I think we were a touch too ridiculous. But that's just what happens when we find shit bars...we resort back to our Hullish instincts. Eddy Pub trained us well." Life has been pretty much stagnant. I actually had to crack open a school book this weekend. I don't think I like this practice very much. At least in 3 more years I will have the satisfaction of being able to hang my degree on the bathroom wall; And being able to stare at it every morning before I venture off to work at the dollar store. |
Thursday, September 23rd, 2004 |
[14 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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Dear government, a) I do not appreciate random bills you are sending me for your taxing purposes; As I find I am already getting taxed way too much off the minimum wage salary I am currently making. b) Please learn how to get my name right. ENN is NOT my name, thanx. I've tried to rectify this problem twice now, But apparently you enjoy sending random bills to the 14th letter of the alphabet? For kicks? Not so kickin' for me, k? ( After.taste ) |
Tuesday, September 21st, 2004 |
[37 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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I have a shady book buying appointment with random girl from the internet today. No idea what this broad looks like; So I think I just might make a sign with her name on it and hold it up at our meeting spot. Like how they work things in airports. I am amazing. Due to the fact that I have this awesome habit of setting alarm clocks on p.m. instead of the intended a.m. & I was going to try so hard not to miss any classes this year. Well, at least for the first month. It's all down hill from here. My Social deviance class makes me think that everyone is a serial killer. The best part about semi-giant classes is how everyone glances around the room and stares at all the people across from them. And then occasionally, you'll have awkward eye-to-eye contact with the person who is doing the same thing as you. And then you both quickly glance away, hoping the other person didn't notice. Oh, but we always notice. You ain't fooling anybody. Then there is this predisposition to always look back at that person to see if they are glancing at you again. Oh, and it always happens again. I like this game. I want to see Igby Goes Down again, 'Tis been far too long. Oh Igby. Cleaning out computers are similar to cleaning out your room; You find junk that you semi-forgot about. ( Like theories of extinction ) |
Friday, September 17th, 2004 |
[7 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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I am working forever tomorrow. BUT! I will finally have my long awaited chance to reconstruct and EXTEND the Halloween aisle. I don't know if I'm going to be able to sleep tonight; Excitement is bubbling like a brew. Once done, everyone should take at least one field trip to the aisle. It'll be an artisan outing, Like visiting the Mona Lisa. While random late night park hang out, Friend thought of the most wonderful idea: A Cole's Notes version of the classes offered on the TV. It would sell like hotcakes. All the basics you need to now for the exam in 1/4 of the time. Need to get this ball rolling. Oh yes. Rogers Wireless thought that it would be ridiculously funny to play and early April Fools prank on myself. Heart attack came after the envelope was opened and the bill expected to be $31.65 turned out to be $104.78. Thanks for not taking off my last payment even though I paid it way before due date, And thanks for my free text messaging deal. After talking to lady on the telephone for one half of one hour, Bill was down to decent amount. All this schooling and all this working and all these bad habbits leave very little time for the love of my life: baking. I missss you spatula baby. Frowns all around. |
Tuesday, September 14th, 2004 |
[19 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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School is essentially the same as last year. But this time I'm not getting lost. As much. ( Halloween is in only 47 days ) ![]() ( & Introducing the wig... ) |
Thursday, September 9th, 2004 |
[4 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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Dear God, I am sorry for killing all those spiders about a month ago with Karolina in that paddle boat. You see we were real scared of them, And didn't know of any better way to handle the situation. I never fathomed it would result in Ottawa breaking it's rainfall record, For the most precipitation aquired in one day EVER. I think having to bear with the torrential monsoon with only a flimsy rain jacket on for 50 minutes was a decent enough punishment. Note to self: No killing spiders anymore. Thanks Jesus, Erin Since when was LJ a confessional? The mother is the bestest: "Erin, there's a chicken finger in the fridge for you. I left you the one that looks like a dinosaur." So schoolio went downio today. My favourite part was the flooded tunnels, And the standing in the rain. And then I go to the workplace, & find the ENTIRE Halloween aisle is now up, And I had NOTHING to do with it. xox. |
Wednesday, September 8th, 2004 |
[13 Miles/Hour | Down the drain]
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Today I sat outside with good friends Mr. Belmont and Mr. Folgers and Mr. Sunset, And reminisced about the good times that come and past in the past 4 months. Was like a Blur song, But replace TV with cigarettes, With added bonus of sunset. Or not like a Blur song at all actually. Bye summer, T'was a goodie. See you at C U. Dyed the ol' hair today. The color and newly acquired hair cut do not go so hot together. Seriously looks like I am wearing a giant fake hot red wig. I've never wanted my hair to actually fade before like this. Someone fix my USB cable connection. I will repay with cookies, and sex. Of course. This song has been in the head for 2 weeks straight. Can't get enough. ( (name) drop it like it's hot ) |
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LiveJournal for Yesterday's Confetti.
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