sometimes when I read what I've written for schoolwork I just want to run away

done now but for the referencing, which is always pure fun, then I'm going to print off a rasterized picture of my face and mount it on my wall. hurrah.

well yesterday's presentation went down fine as expected and when I got back I had a good bit of sleep to store up for the next few days, 6-12 then 2-11 so I can work/mess about all of today and then busy busy the 4-day weekend away as I surely shall

about 3/4 of the way through this essay, I think I've pulled it back on track again as usually about a half way through I notice that I'm totally off topic and have ran out of stuff to say, but I think I've pulled it back again, just got to drop another k on PMCs (i.e. copy and paste from previous essays *shush*) and then finish it off with a quick few hundred on a summary, then of course actually clean the thing up so that it makes some kind of tenuous logic throughout.. or just make sure all the paragraphs look nicely laid out on the pages, more likely

rasterised a few pics also, tho I will wait until this is done and printed before I start using 50 pages of ink on huge wall-images etc, also printing locks my computer up insanely

now, got to actually do some writing and not just read the books dammit...

[	mood	|	amused	]
[	music	|	AC/DC - Shoot To Thrill	]

yeah so I'm skipping class now, so what, there were about 40% of the ppl on the course in this morning anyway and at least one of them decided to take the rest of the day off after class 1, at least I'm going back in an hour...

presentation all printed off and in my bag, a bag that also contains a few, um, 'other' items as discussed with a few guys earlier over coffee, though it looks like I'm going somewhat Columbine I'm really not, I mean I'm going to classes all day about this stuff, some of us just like the more practical applications, I mean a guy who steals a heavy machine gun off a tank and straps it to his landrover while working out in the Sudan for the UN is the kind of guy you feel safe around, no?

lunch, being curry leftovers, was predictably nice.. now it's just a matter of sitting around here for another half hour and heading back to the campus for this presentation (successfully printed out) and back here to do some more essay work...

[	mood	|	okay	]
[	music	|	Iron Monkey - 9 Joint Spiritual whip	]

I just can't concentrate, I did too much work last night to do some now aswell, essay half written this early in the week means slacking time ahead for me today I'm afraid, I'll finish it tomorrow/Wednesday, then I'll be about 75% done for this semester, 25% done for the whole degree and should have netted myself about 30%+ of my final mark, hoorah.

sorted out my presentation for tomorrow pretty well though, even though my partner for it is a little bit of a drug casualty (I mean describing a dog as beautiful and illustrating it by putting your hands over your head dog ear style and grinning...) I'm sure she'll pull through ok, just got to print off the slides for it now, I've failed to get a good picture of immigration so unless I can score one now it'll be image-bare

picked up a belt and a hat earlier on the way back from the campus, it's getting chilly outside even if it does make me look like a street-thug, so it's all good really

see who'd going to turn up to dinner tonight, I'm expecting my parents and perhaps my sister, you never know, still, beer and curry are a good way to spend any evening

[	mood	|	content	]
[	music	|	Schiztome - Phrenic	]

well so much for writing without distractions, shortly after my last post I decided to cycle my RPD a few times, it jammed almost right away and I had to talk it half to pieces to unblock the feed mechanism... ah well, back on track after that

almost at the 50% mark on this report now, easy enough, it's crap, obviously, but it's half done and that's what matters

one annoying thing, for the last week I haven't been able to find my scalpel... most annoying, dirt cheap though it was (bulk buying wins again) but still, I resent losing edged tools such as that without any seeming reason.. it has to be within reach, but out of sight...

perhaps another half k to knock off this evening, I'll do a bunch more tomorrow afternoon, see if I can't get it mostly done by Tuesday etc...

anyway, I need a shower and a shave, also some research on the look of sub-artic tundra is needed

[	mood	|	content	]
[	music	|	Eels - Manchild	]

so yeah, I've spanked out about 1/4 of this essay in the last couple of hours, a nice load of half-baked musings and barely researched factoids, just the way I like it.. though it is giving me a little more hope for the last essay as I was supposed to, or at lest could have been approaching it with near-zero knowledge of the subject like I am with this one, and have been supposed to construct a essay out of nothing, the problem I had with that one was I couldn't express all of the stuff I did know into the confines of the thing I was supposed to be writing, this one I've got just the opposite, well, almost, problem...

I managed to get through one degree using this poor an approach, I'm sure it'll work in this one too... either the standard is very low, which from the others on the course it seems not to be, or I'm just very clever and brimming with natural talent at this sort of thing... I wouldn't like to boast but unless there's a third solution to this all...

I'll see if I can knock off another k or two this afternoon, Sunday's always quiet otherwise so I've got no distractions to keep me away from it (I note that I'm currently distracted/away, but hey) and otherwise see if I can't do most of it in this one day... got a meeting tomorrow for my presentation and dinner with my parents who are back in town again, called last week and they were at the other end of the country... then might do something Tuesday night and that leaves me Wednesday to basically finish this thing off

should be cool, it always is in the end

[	mood	|	amused	]
[	music	|	Massive Attack - Angel	]

You're Ulysses!

by James Joyce

Most people are convinced that you don't make any sense, but compared
to what else you could say, what you're saying now makes tons of sense. What people do
understand about you is your vulgarity, which has convinced people that you are at once
brilliant and repugnant. Meanwhile you are content to wander around aimlessly, taking in
the sights and sounds of the city. What you see is vast, almost limitless, and brings you
additional fame. When no one is looking, you dream of being a Greek folk hero.


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

[	mood	|	weird	]
[	music	|	Sparta - Travel By Bloodline	]

suddenly I'm feeling weird again, I don;t know what it is but every once in a while it comes by and I just start feeling, you know, weird

this is the sort of time I start drinking and making phone calls or e-mails that I, in a better frame of mine, would not.. right now I'm drinking a can of beer left over from the weekend, I found a stack of them in bag downstairs, also in that bag was the sweater I'm wearing now, for some reason I thought it would be a good idea to put it on today

could be that I'm planning on staying off the radar for the next 3 days, bar a visit to the supermarket tomorrow probably, just keeping out of the way, lifting some weights, reading some books, that sort of thing, perhaps it's looking at my degree and seeing that I'm basically 1/5 of the way through it already, I don't know

I;m going to be busy next week, presentation on Tuesday, essay on Thursday morning and work from then until the end of the weekend, I suppose I'm getting some chilling time in while I can...

I'll probably wait until it's dark before shopping tomorrow

[	mood	|	amused	]
[	music	|	Tindersticks - Whisky & Water	]

one of my flatmates had a bit of a jamming session downstairs earlier with some guy, they sounded pretty good even though he's supposed to be ill and off school, but hey, he was on guitar, not singing so I suppose it's ok

talking of school I finally got the mark back for my first bit of work, a full 68% which is 18% more than I need to pass, this is a good thing, it means the thing I handed in last week (which was crap) can drop down to about 40% and I'll still be on track... so that's, well, just over 3% of my final mark back of which I got just over 2%

50 is the pass mark, so just another 48% point to go and I'm there, note that a full 1/3 of the mark goes on the final dissertation, so really I'm looking at getting about 20%ish of the final mark per semester, so far I'm far ahead of the game

it all works out in the end, I just like to measure it at the micro level, the think I handed in last week can get me a max of 8 and 1/3%, I'm guessing it'll be closer to the 5% mark as it was worth 2.5 times the marks of the one I've got back yet I feel it was far poorer, so 4-5% would be about right... and counting the presentation I did last week that was worth slightly more than 2%, this will give me a mark of about 9%, as I'm going for the 50% pass mark I'm looking at double that in real terms, I.e. closing in on 20% of the final mark, already 1/5 of the degree done

easy

maths is my friend, it helps me to rationalise not doing work, I'm 1/5 of the way through my masters, time to kick back and have a congratulationary chill I feel...

yeah, I got through in the end, meeting up at midday tomorrow fora few hours etc, think I'll have myself a quick haircut and shower seeing as I've just scoffed a nice big plate of chilli-pasta and cheese... my clippers are getting screwed up, I suppose they've lasted well, something to add to my Christmas/birthday list at least

kinda crazy that this semester's already about 2/3 over, it does end early I suppose, but still, only a few weeks, 2 essays and 2 presentation to go and I'm done until the end of Jan, well, lots of out of school work and the like to do then, but hey, should be cool

I'd have kinda liked my first report marks back by now, as was the intention, so we can see how we're going wrong and correct it for the rest of the semesters stuff, it's going to end up coming back with the rest of the stuff I can see, so much for plans

anyway, buzz buzz

ok, feeling a little better after a whole bunch of sleep and a wander around town, well, more of a storm around town, moving target etc... now to make a quick phione call to see what i'm up to tomorrow...

*does so*

well ok, it's engaged and has been for the last 10 mins, screw her, i'm off to get some food

[	mood	|	sick	]
[	music	|	UNKLE - Safe In Mind (Please Get This Gun From Out My Face)	]

"morning"

"morning"

"see you later"

"yep"

"you ok?"

"nope"

got up about 2 hours late just now, i.e. missed lecture no1, I'll get in easily in time for no2 I'm planning so I can do this little presentation then consider skipping no3 and just coming back to bed, I mean it'd be a rather poor show if I missed this presentation as well

I'll give it a few days and if I don't feel better I'll buy some pills or something, during that time sleep and water will do

oh, and I'll supposed to be doing another presentation next week, see if I can find the person I'm doing that with as she wasn't in last week, perhaps she's dropped down too..

[	mood	|	groggy	]
[	music	|	Hope Of The States - 66 Sleepers till Summer	]

yeah, so much for no distractions, I awake this morning to see off my last 2 guests and find that my presentation partner has gone down with glandular fever, aka the kissing disease, so now she's out of the picture I've got to do the whole thing by my self, easy... oh, and perhaps see about getting checked out for glandular fever, ahem...

presentations are easy, especially as I now have 2 times the work to fit in so I don't have to go into too much depth anywhere, also I've added lots of pics of book burnings to keep people watching, and I'll get a sympathy vote to go with it and prehaps a public health warning about dirty contagious students

I've left her name on the first slide, but now with lines striking through it, just so everyone knows what's going down

I don't feel too bad, headachy, sore throat, mild body pains, tiredness etc, could be glandular fever or it could just be post-weekend downtime still.. though seeing as I've been like this even before the weekend started... oh well, it'll all be good, some little malaise won't stop me

[	mood	|	restless	]
[	music	|	American Head Charge - Just So You Know	]

so I've just got out of the shower, 3 days and nights of filth washed of, a week of stubble down the drain and a few hundred quid lighter for it

all in all a strange one really, people leaving as fast as they arrived doesn't do much for closure, it encapsulates months of activities and contact into, what, just 3 days? what comes out can take a few days to decompress, I'll see if I can start that now

it feels good to be out of my clothes again, 3 days I've been wearing those, tho I did swap t-shirts once, the whole sleeping on the floor, fully clothed and under my coat for 2 nights did kind of counteract that I feel, also starting to get straight from all the alcohol in my system is somewhat refreshing, start drinking on Thursday night and finished about 20 hours ago, mostly foul horrible drinks with the odd nice one here and there, all manner of food, both takeaway, restaurant and street consumed, and at times, returned faster than intended... also I've got to get a better control on some of my more violent sociopathic impulses, but I guess it comes with practice, something I'm not too willing to put time into

while the general thought was that she had kicked her boyfriend to the kerb, it seems that she hasn't, or at least that's her side of the story in so much as noone challenged her directly and she took little move to tell us the truth, her answers seemed somewhat forced, I've been there and I kind of recognise it

she looked so beautiful, under a head of dirty blonde hair shaking out in the smoke and lights, a blur of her movement and mine, we could have danced for minutes but it felt like forever and my arm's still bruised from one of her punches from the first night's walk back to the hotel... she went home early this morning, after the street sex we watched together while eating chips last night before I helped her get her shoe unstuck from a grid a little further down the road was the last time I saw her, we said we'd meet for breakfast but after saying our goodnights we ended up leaving separately in the end, I dreamed about her all night

time to kick things up a gear this week, I've got a lot of school work to do, probably won't be seeing anyone until Christmas, if even then... got some time off in a month so I should really work up until then, I'll get back into things tomorrow and distractions will be out for a while, the last 3 days will last me a while, being around some people you find that no time is too much or two little

say most of About A Boy, pretty crap really, don't

essay is printing off as I type, mostly done earlier so when the call "Ollie! Curry!" came, I had to answer in the affirmative, even though I'll probably be having one tomorrow when ppl arrive

rum do this weekend, not only do I have to get up early tomorrow (so my weekend starts Thursday, screw you) to hand this in and attend a somewhat pointless meeting, if only for the other attendee to enjoy my company, but it's the start of what could be a weird one, seems someone might have cryptically shed her boyfriend, it took long enough, but we'll see

curry for 2 days isn't the best idea, you know when they show pictures of some crappy place in Iraq where the sewers have taken a direct hit and the streets are filling with sewage, well, going out the back of the house today to fight with the washing line brought me face to face with, really, a sea of shite... seems one of the sewage pipes have backed up and is venting into our back yard... needless to say I hung my washing (bed sheets) up on the radiators inside after coming up against that slick...

now everytime we flush the toilet it spills straight into our yard, then into the back ally... and the bins haven't been taken away for weeks so that's stacking up in the streets, I mean ghetto ghetto

I'm painfully full after that curry, as per usual, I'm going to give the room a post-essay clean in a sec with Winnebago Deal driving me on, I think I like the second album more than the first, it's so much heavier, that much noise form just two people, it's driving music to be sure

lots to do tomorrow, crazy Chinese to deal with, driving and meetings and all sorts, oh yes, and I was going to have a shower tonight... if I remember

spelt the sleep of the dammed for the last 6 hours, got in after school and just grabbed some hot food, checked the internet and slept... plan was that I'd do so then do some essay work so as to be able to finish it tomorrow afternoon, that has yet to happen, but I have only just got up

interesting dreams anyway, mostly school related in weird ways, past present and future, lots of war, Texas and talking

only had 2 lessons today, barely more than 3 hours worth, the rest was just hanging around with ppl, was supposed to go to a focus groups with a guy of my old sociology course which turned out to be, well, just me there so we abandoned it and went off for a drink and just chatted about films and music for an hour or so, then I met back up with ppl off my course and we chatted about... films and conspiracy theories, then an hour or so of lectures and I managed to catch the guy to see it I could do some neo-medievalism for the essay in 2 weeks and he said probably, so I ended the day quite well

despite currently hating this one essay I am still very much enjoying the degree overall, especially when I get to miss a boring lecture as I did today... there were over 25 ppl at the start of the thing, today there were 15... less in the afternoon... if that's just ppl missing a few days here and there or if they've just disappeared I'm unsure, 'wastage' etc

huh, guess I should do some work in a bit I suppose...

[	mood	|	hungry	]
[	music	|	Ikara Colt - Pop Group	]

2/3 through this thing now, re-written the start so it's not so crap and finished the middle (minus re-write) now just to put on the end and clean it up... feeling a bit better about it now if only for the fact that it can in no way be good, so I'm just making it as least-bad as I can

parents are in town after a few weeks working out in the far east so I'm heading over to their flat in a sec to go out for a curry wit them, I'll drink a lot and sleep all night followed by classes all day tomorrow, apart from the one I'm going to skip to go attend a 2 hour focus group, then I'll say here tomorrow night to write some more of this up, with any luck finishing it early Wednesday so I've got some time to do my presentation that I'll be exciting next Tuesday, then one the next week followed 2 days later by an essay and another essay 2 more weeks later...

suddenly all this stuff jumps out on you

ah well, I can take it,50%'s all I need, easy.

getting more of an idea for my dissertation tho, neo-medievalism, google it.

[	mood	|	annoyed	]
[	music	|	Khanate - Dead	]

I just do not want to write this essay, it's fighting every word of the way, I'm over 40% through it and it's just tedious, every word I write I hate and it's just terrible, I'm going to have to cut it down after I've finished anyway, it'll be 3500 words of nothing by the time I'm done with it

how can you write anything 3500 words, I know all I need is a 50%, that is to say literally hit and miss with the quality of it, but I just hate to under-do these thing but I have to

while I'm fully prepared to jump through a few hoops this one feels more like I'm trying to squeeze through it, and it's on the floor, and it's made of damp paper... kind of a big what's the point?

I might just throw down some more notes now rather than try to write the thing properly then do it up tomorrow some more, start from the start and try to fix the thing somehow...

until then I'm going to lie down and read some more, I've just noticed that it's almost 1am, I thought it was closer to 11...

blah blah, click this and read: Believe it or not, it wasn't just rednecks who voted for Bush