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12:11 pm, Thursday 6th January, 2005
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Definition of "a kick in the head".
When a maxtor drive you got directly from maxtor as a replacement for a dead maxtor drive, which you store your vital data on (music collection, video / tv folder. vast collection of ebooks) decides to die. For no reason. Massive MFT curruption and file read errors.
There's still data recovery hope and I have backups in various places of a lot of the content (even if just through giving it to friends),
But fucking hell. Buying a new hard disk today it appears, and RMA'ing this bastard. Lets see if I get a 400gig this time from them...
Music: Tomahawk - 01 - Flashback
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3:47 pm, Wednesday 5th January, 2005
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Woah unexpected.
Jimmy chamberlaines solo project is really good...
Music: Jimmy Chamberlin Project - Streetcrawler
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4:30 pm, Tuesday 4th January, 2005
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I guess it's been a bit too long and really I've been fine.
Christmas and new year have passed pleasently with little event worth of note. I keep doing summaries of summaries of summaries. I'm developing a few ideas at the moment for some of my own projects and lending an eye to a few others. I'm toying with the idea of writing an adventure game. I'm not entirely sure if it's something I'll be able to grasp on my own so I may be thinking about picking up a few people who might be interested in doing lots of work for no rewards...
On a lighter note, I'm feeling quite good about myself at the moment, seperate from the thoughts and rubbish associated with uni I'm feeling reasonably content. I know everyone is in quite a transient time in their lives at the moment but when the floor is apparently so shakey I'm feeling an alarming amount of resolve and confidence. I don't know how the story ends but I'm sure there'll be another. Along with any other number of crass analogies.
A quick sneak peak, I'm not sure if I really should because it's not really my call but I'm moderatly excited about the visual.
There's nothing here yet as such but the base visual
missing all elements that would make it interactive and make sense. But I'll assure you, it'll be more textual than alot of things I've worked on in the past year or so because of it's purpose; promotion of the music. Again, just a concept, a visual, so don't judge anything by it. But I'm hopeful, and I'm also hopeful I'll drag a few new stylistic elements into the finished thing, a few new ideas. I'd like to think I'm progressing but I don't think the visuals represent the progression just yet.
But throw away the past, it doesn't matter anymore. Important projects this year:
Continuation and conclusion of seekwell. Plotting, storyboarding and conceptualising the as yet untitled and unplotted adventure game. Perhaps work on conclusively putting together a little "sketchbook" of noteworthy illustraitions from the past two or three years. Specifically summarising the current "style" I'm playing with so I can maybe move on to something else. "seekwell2" - Something resembling a graphic novel, potentially connected to the storyboards of the adventure game. If the idea works. A few cool programming ideas I have that I'm not going to go into here because nobody wants to read about them. I'm a geek, sue me. Learn the MS-XBOX-SDK and port a few apps as tests. Provide any input I can to others that matter.
My friends continue to be the best I could hope for, both the old and thew new ones and especially over the christmas and new year peroid it has been apparent to me how close I am to these people, it's become apparent to me the people I miss the most in their absence and it's become very apparent to me that people continue to matter more than anything.
Oh and on a side note, if anyone hasn't read the nin.com post, "With teeth" is finished, the band are rehearsing to tour, the albums mixed and "gone gold". I still have faith in music....
take care x
Music: Tool - 12 - Triad
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6:35 pm, Wednesday 29th December, 2004
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Today I bought Anathema - Alternative 4 (reissue with bonus tracks) and Katatonia - Viva Emptiness. The former for the bonus tracks and the latter out of guilt of overlistening to an album I don't own.
Oh and a 5.1 surround system and a new sound card. While I was at it, y'know?
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5:12 pm, Tuesday 28th December, 2004
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Everytime I come to write some vast swooping statement in here or some form of review, it gets lost. I always have to do something else.
Like now.
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Music: dere0n - RETREAT PERSONAL MIX
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12:43 am, Saturday 25th December, 2004
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Happy Christmas.
I still love you all. (Though some of you significantly more than others.)
Hope today's good.
I've just recovered from almost losing 250gigs of data. I feel so safe and warm now. I don't know if I should be blaiming Microsoft or Maxtor. Or both. To be fair, MS Utilities rescued me, so I'll give them the credit and Maxtor the blaim.
And on a total sidenote, Burnout3: Takedown is so good it hurts, I never thought it'd be sold to me, but seriously, most fun racing game ever.
Music: The Wildhearts - Geordie In Wonderland
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2:47 am, Wednesday 15th December, 2004
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Hmm forgot to mention it
There's a house party on friday, so turn up.
Music: Alice In Chains - Again (Tattoo Of Pain Mix)
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4:57 am, Tuesday 14th December, 2004
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You know what I love?
Doing Christmas shopping on the internet.
I love it more than you'd imagine.
Music: Devin Townsend - Jupiter
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12:44 pm, Friday 10th December, 2004
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Oh my god I'm tired. But I have no more work to do.
The last few minutes of this track have the potential to be absolutely epic with the right combination of deep toned bass and some vocal work.. with any luck you'll all see one day :o)
(oh and jillys last night with a load of username tags like el, liam, frances, matt (of the wieteska), lydia, briony, al and all the other familiar faces was fun, but sweaty, very very hot and tiring after such a long day)
Music: dere0n - v3fullish very rough saitanai 08 12 04 1516-01
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11:06 pm, Monday 6th December, 2004
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Passenger
"Chrome buttons, buckles, and leather surfaces... these and other lucky witnesses..."
I seem to have forgotten both how the deftones actually really rule, and how much this song just reminds me of pure, unadulterated sex.
But you know, no issue, no issue.
I have a presentation to two people tomorrow where they get to spend ten minutes carefully disecting my third year project, which by it's very nature is excessively difficult to impliment. And I get to see just how many flaws my conceptual design has.
Then I get to pick myself up for Wednesdays deadline, then I get to pick myself up for Thursdays deadline. Because misery really really REALLY loves company.
I've spent almost a week away from my own bed and I think for once, tonight I'm thankful for it, to think I almost didn't notice. But come Thursday I anticipaite an overdose of alcohol and metal, followed by going to see Fear Factory on Friday night. So lets keep on chasing those lights at the end of tunnels eh?
"let the whole world look in, who cares who sees what tonight, roll these mistey windows down to catch my breath and then go and go and go..."
Music: Deftones - Passenger
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2:48 am, Monday 29th November, 2004
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"And what you promised me, I hope will set you free"
I'm still around, I keep having things to see that are judged unimportant after a few days. I've been in bed with a cold, I've written an iterim project report on a project that I can... conceptualise well.
I'm going to bed.
Music: 2000 - 06 - Blue Skies Bring Tears
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12:36 am, Wednesday 24th November, 2004
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Dell in pure evil shocker
I didn't mention it, but the laptop arrived a few weeks ago and it's fantastic.
I got a free printer without even asking, which I don't really need or really want, but it's here. So anyway, I've just got round to installing it, and after recalling something I've definatly come to the "Dell are pure evil when it comes to printers" conclusion.
I have a "Dell" 720 (otherwise known as a Lexmark something or another), however the crafty folk at dell have keyed the ink cartridges differently, meaning that standard lexmark "buy this ink anywhere" doesn't FIT this printer, and I have to order ink directly from dell (or indeed, wait for other companys to start producing ink for these bastardised lexmarks).
I guess I could use refills. Or just buy some damn ink for my perfectly fine Epson printer that's served me well for years without being a servant of pure evil.....
Music: Katatonia - Nightmares by the sea
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11:26 am, Tuesday 16th November, 2004
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Oh my, looks like Half Life 2 just won all the game of the year awards again.
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1:16 am, Tuesday 16th November, 2004
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Halo 2:
Single player and coop is fantastic, multiplayer VERY lacking compared to the first, the map design just isn't as good.
Half Life 2:
Fully preloaded but I just went to buy it and realised the bastards only take USA cards, ie, visa, mastercard, so unless anyone wants to buy my copy I'm going to have to get up very early tomorrow to go to the shops and buy it.
God damnit.
[edit]
And James just saved my half life related woes, because he rules :o)
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3:17 am, Wednesday 10th November, 2004
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Because you never know...
... I'm looking to get a PDA as an eBook reader *and nothing else*.
I couldn't care less about ANY other functionality. Looking for 16mb flash onboard, preferably a colour screen (larger size screen the better) and the capability to open PDFs and generic text documents.
Basically a nice old Palm would do the trick, just something I can use to hit "page down" on.
Trying to keep it as cheap as possible, seriously, looking for something second hand around the £30-40 mark. Anyone have any suggestions?
I know that palmOS has readers for everything under the sun so that kinda makes sense. Again bare in mind I'll be using this thing for nothing other than reading text and perhaps the odd picture document....
Music: A Perfect Circle - Magdalena
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12:59 am, Wednesday 10th November, 2004
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For the sake of documentation.
Placebo were *very* good on friday night. 10 year show at Wembly. They re-worked a bunch of songs on stage very well, had Robert Smith join them for 2 songs (including a cover of Boys Don't Cry, which was fun, even if it's a lesser cure song by a great degree.) and played Nancy Boy for the first time in years.
The Tate Britain had some fantastic art in it. The Turner Prize on the other hand, was complete BILE. I don't know when every man who could write a documentry was told he was an artist, but if I ever meet the person who did that telling I'll kick them in the face. Uninspired crap with no meaning that stood for any more than stateing the obvious and no clear artistic merit or visual skill. A waste of four pounds and a lost hour and a half of my time I'll never get back. The comments room serverd as the best document. "I couldn't get past the first level of that Osama Bin Laden house game, please help" summed the exhibition up perfectly.
The landscapes by some very renowned artists on the other hand, WERE fantastic. And some of William Blakes pieces in connection to Heaven and Hell were great. Some were less so, he was a better writer in the end, but some of it was fantastic. The place was huge and some of the modern art was the very summary of things I hate about modern art, whilst some of the more classical work was utterly beautiful.
Camden was Camden, but and bustling and very difficult to find the specific things you're looking for in. But that'll never change and it's for the better it doesn't.
Hospitality was fantastic and the extremely metal pub on Saturday night was quite great, if a bit surreal being in a place with an obvious metal "scene" and not knowing a single forign face.
Good times.
Laptop is hopfully incoming tomorrow after a series of annoying errors on Dells part, but you know, it's not the end of the world really is it.
Music: Isis - Wills Dissolve
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12:14 am, Thursday 4th November, 2004
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What to say...
I've been feeling ill for a few days now, headaches that won't go and keep me awake til 5am wanting to just fall unconscious, but every time for a moment I leave my mind at a blank, being aware of a throbbing. I feel as bad as I look and I'm feeling a little isolated again. I feel like I look too pale.
The weekend and back end of the week was good, and it was good for no reason, simply because when I'm with my friends I feel comforted.
I never feel like I need to write in here anymore, it's not supportive it's just here as a stage to stand on every so often when my mind wanders when it used to be about venting. I guess that's a good thing in reality, I prefer it this way. There's something about real life that's unparralelled even by a thousand e-people who you e-respect giving you e-hugs and e-kisses. I'm not happy but I'm not miserable and there's nothing wrong with my life.
I'm missing a few people at the moment, people who have a noteworthy impact on my life who've been absent for one reason or another, obviously on a case to case basis, and I think it's starting to have it's effect on me. When I say missing it could be from a few hours to a few days to a few minutes, but in each case a few minutes longer than I'd like and definatly for a few of them a little longer than I'd wish to be comfortable with.
Late last week I went out to a place that could only be described as a cattle market, just to keep a worthy friend company, and I swear, after sitting in that room for what was probably an hour, I don't know how some people do it. And then it dawned on me that really, I honest to my god, your god or their god, have no idea. And I refuse to trivialise my life in the same way.
I'm sick of uni, still. My first wasted year out of three years of a wasted degree. It's the people y'see. I have a few, but out of the people that really matter only a few really remain at the moment, only a handful of months until the escape into unemployment or finding a job that probably won't pacify nor satisfy my creative side, because it's dawning on me that increasingly little does these days, I have so many ideas and I'm quietly working on them, but I feel like I'm running with projects of my own that I won't finish until I 'm 30. But you know, in that case, 30'll be a really good year.
The people in my life continue to amaze, support, entertain and love me. Now go and do something more interesting than read my journal for the love of god.
I'm enjoying my life a lot, I just need more of a focus that I can be 100% motivated by
Music: Oceansize - One Day All This Could Be Yours
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6:12 pm, Wednesday 3rd November, 2004
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Token Political Post
Davids list of "People who didn't deserve to win the USA Election".
George Bush John Kerry
Sucks to be America right?
I'd love to say you get what you either pay or vote for. But you don't. It doesn't matter how it ends up, you were always going to end up fucked.
Music: Everclear - Summerland
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6:43 pm, Monday 1st November, 2004
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*sigh* still no laptop, getting increasingly pissed off and really starting to think I should've just ordered the fucking thing from Dell, I couldn't care less about the random free printer and case I'm getting. I have a printer and case.
From the end of last week it's not "by the end of the week".
When of course, I won't even be here, because I'm going to London on Friday.
I'm not angry as such, just really feeling dissapointed and a bit miffed.
Music: Nine Inch Nails - 12 - Reptile
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5:38 pm, Wednesday 27th October, 2004
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Does the "sent back a broken 120gig hdd and got a 250gig in return dance".
That brightened up my day :oP
*formats*
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