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Monday, April 2nd, 2001
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11:51 pm - I might as well be dead...
cause I ain't nothin to nobody,
I might as well be dead,
with a bullet in my head,
I might as well be dead,
6 feet under, pushing up daisies,
I might as well be dead,
I'm drivin myself crazy,
I might as well be dead,
and kickin the bucket,
I might as well be dead,
ah, just fuck it,
I might as well be dead,
why did everyone leave me?,
I might as well be dead,
I'm going to go watch some t.v.
current mood:  apathetic
current music: the noise of silence (10 comments | comment on this)
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Friday, March 30th, 2001
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5:33 am - Watch out!!!...
Watch out for the blinding speed of my 28.8 kbps Internet connection! Yeah, I know. Gawd it sucks. When I move I'm getting my own phone line and cable Internet. Hell yeah! Broadband! Going to bed now, seriously.
current mood:  tired
current music: George Thorogood - One Bourbon One Scotch One Beer (2 comments | comment on this)
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1:42 am - Whoa!!!...
Let me off this emotional roller coaster, mutha fucka.
I've gone and done it people...I'm going back to Taco Bell to work again. Oh well, it's money in my pocket. Sounds good to me since I'm broke. The good thing is Tom and Dustin work there again and Ryan is now the general manager. A fast food job couldn't get much sweeter than that really. I'm wanting to be a manager there so if Ryan doesn't let me be one I'll just have to kick his ass a bit. I'll be working full time at night. I'll finally be able to pay my mom back and pay off some of my other debts I've accumulated. I'll also be buying my sweetypie g/f Danielle a bunch of stuff...I already have some ideas in mind. When I have some extra cash I'm going to get Fallout Tactics and Giants. Those 2 games are bad as hell. Alice is a really kick-ass game but some parts are just really aggravating and there are some annoying things as well.
Moving update: I'm not moving to Indianapolis like I had planned. I'm moving to Anderson (something I had planned earlier in the year). I'm just about to move too. I think it's going to be pretty cool. At least I hope so anyway. Hopefully when I start back to college in the fall (Ball State University) I will apply myself. Hopefully I'll get me a new set of wheels so I can actually make it to school.
I got brakes pads today! Now I'm not scraping metal and fearing that I'll lose control of my car and crash and die and my head go through the windshield and my brains fly into the back seat and stuff. lol.
Oh gawd, this Effexor isn't working. My days lately have been extreme ups and downs. Not so much up as much as down unfortunately.
My near future plans consist of getting a tribal tattoo down my left arm all the way down to my wrist, get several piercing, and buy some cool and fun stuff for my new place (like a huge fountain to put in the middle of the bedroom floor. lol.
Lately I've been too down to work on my web site. I just kind of stopped one day, but I have been thinking of a lot of new ideas and designs for it. I'm going to be putting my review of the A Perfect Circle concert on there soon. Right now the review I wrote is on their web site but you'll have to search through all the other people's to find it. My name I put there is Cody (duh). I think I'll make it look so damn awesome that everyone will be like "damn, he's good."
...shyah, and monkeys might fly out my butt.
current mood:  nostalgic
current music: Yngwie J. Malmsteen - Facing the Animal (10 comments | comment on this)
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Friday, March 23rd, 2001
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1:29 am - itchy, burning labia, Batman!...
CRACKLING CROTCH ROT!!!!!!!!!
...mmmm...crunchy crotch crickets.
again, don't ask.
current mood: fucked in the head
current music: George Gershwin - Rhapsody in Blue (11 comments | comment on this)
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12:57 am - I'M SO SURE!!!...cough cough cough...yum yum yum...
Free piggy-back rides for everyone!*
After Danielle left today, my day turned to shit. I was in a bad mood and ripped apart my closet, throwing almost everything away. I overflowed the garbage can. Oh well. Earlier today a woman called me about an apartment in Broad Ripple that will be available in about 2 weeks. If my credit check goes through I may be living there soon. I may be going to Tennessee soon to visit some family which most of them I've never met before. That'll be fun. I wish I had some money to take with me. I'm forcing myself to write right now. I feel like crawling up into a tight ball and wasting away. I found some lyrics I wrote a good while back. They're very interesting to say the least. Some of the lyrics in one of the songs I wrote 2 years ago I like a lot. I titled the song "Love You to Death". I didn't know Type O Negative had a song titled that until a long time after I had written it. I'm not changing the title.
Happiness, stop by for a length of time,
Stop by so you can be all mine,
You can get rid of all mistakes,
Just take the time to stop by.
*excludes everyone being of 150 lbs or more in weight and/or is ugly as sin.
current mood:  pessimistic
current music: Tool - Hush (3 comments | comment on this)
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Saturday, March 17th, 2001
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4:49 pm - I...have...found...some kind of temporary sanity in this...
Getting ready for the A Perfect Circle concert tonight:
I'm ready to go. Gabe [ skinflint ] is in the shower. Danielle [ ninjachicken ] is either finishing getting ready or talking to Sara [ torturedangel56 ] to see if she's ready yet or not. Ross, well, Ross has to be ready to go when Danielle does...he doesn't really have a choice in that matter. I can't wait for the show tonight, it's going to be great. I just heard on the radio that X103 is going to be broadcasting live from the concert, right on. If A Perfect Circle plays Tool covers I'm going to shit. That would be so damn cool. After the show I'm wanting to go eat with a bunch of LJ people including the ones that are going with me and princessofdoom and glamkittie. This should be awesome.
On another note:
I've been out so much lately that when I get back home I'm so tired I don't feel like working on my web site...blah. I really need to because I have so much planned for it. I need to start looking hard for an apartment in Broad Ripple because I'm running out of time before I'm forced to move from here. I don't want to have to start paying rent here, I don't like it here. I hope I get the job I applied for at Net Heads, that place looks like it would so fun to work at. If anyone has read to this point you deserve a hug. *hug*
Please, bare with me for I know not what lay ahead.
current mood:  excited
current music: Tool - Prison Sex (6 comments | comment on this)
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Sunday, March 11th, 2001
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3:38 am - The end of the beginning of my morning...
Well, it was like 2 AM when I got home from going to the Festivilla w/ my g/f [ Danielle aka ninjachicken ], Sara [ torturedangel56 ], Kyle [ statikcat ], and Danielle's brother [ Ross ]. Guess what I forgot when I got home...I was completely out of contact solution. So, I got on my computer for a minute just to say hi to it and kiss the monitor ( j/k lol ) and then I got in my car and drove to Meijer to pick up some solution. I slept the way home from the Festivilla, I was tired as hell. I've had very little sleep for the past 3 days...maybe 5 to 6 hours total. I went in Meijer and bought the new "No Rub" solution that is out...you don't have to scrub the contacts anymore!!! Yay!!! It's not like I cleaned them anyway. lol. Along with the solution I bought 2 bags of Sour Punch Bites. Those things rule. I gulped the strawberry bag down within about 15 minutes. I got to the green apple flavored ones, opened them, and nearly gagged. I was like "hmm, I didn't know these were supposed to smell like a dead animal carcass." I quickly shrugged it off, plugged my nose, and tried one...lol. To my dismay, they didn't taste so great either. Yuck! A whole dollar wasted *slap on forehead*.
current mood:  nauseated
current music: Zao - Resistance (4 comments | comment on this)
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Friday, March 9th, 2001
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11:00 am - I would say that I'm sorry for your ass, but frankly, I'm not...
Well well well...Let's see, where am I? Ah yes, in Never Ever Land. Not to be confused with Never Never Land. Never Ever Land is where computer OEMs like Dell manufacture computers and install hidden drive images to the end of the Windows partition and expect everything to be fine and dandy. Never Ever Land is where that hidden image fucks everything up and the computer NEVER EVER WORKS RIGHT! I have to wait up to a minute for some programs to come up while others zip right up. They're normal programs I might add, such as Internet Explorer and Microsoft Outlook. Wait, there's my problem...Microsoft!!!
Corporations are out to get us and are teamed up with the man! Don't even get me started with government log rolling. That's an entire can of worms right there!
You may be wandering why I'm so irritable this morning. The reason is that I can't sleep and I have tons to do today. I have to mail my credit card payment (no big deal), get my blood test done, go take some bullshit form to my car insurance company, and I'm going over to pick up Kyle and take him with me (along with our computers) over to my friend Dustin's house for a LAN party. This monitor of mine is so damn heavy. I just HAD to have a 21" Trinitron. I think the UPS guy that delivered it said it was like 70 lbs. That's not that heavy but since it's so big it's very awkward to carry. I'm supposed to stay up really late tonight to play games with the fellas and get back up bright and early to start again. We'll just have to see about that.
Ugh, I have to get a job soon or I'll die. I need some mulah. I'm just about to resort back to working at Taco Bell soon. Anyone have any better ideas? Serious ideas that is.
I feel somewhat accomplished today. Last night I gave a holler in Manda's direction. That was cool actually getting to hear her voice rather than see the words. That was a great time. *smiles*. Really early this morning I added a little to my web site and then I worked on the Flash intro for at least 2 hours. Later on I felt somewhat spunky and decided to get my credit card company's phone number off the net and bitch at them. I found a charge for $69.95 that I wasn't familiar with so I called them up on the phone and I grabbed him by his big, fat head and was like "Look man, I'm not going to jail for you or anybody!" *Whoa, calm down, Garth.* They told me to call the number that was next to that company to bitch at them so I did. They were like someone from your credit card company called you and said you wanted to buy this and that....I was like...umm, no. So after arguing for a few minutes they decided to refund the whole amount...I'm a happy camper about that. Then I called my credit card company back and told them that the $69.95 pushed me over my limit and told them that since I'm getting credited back that money that I should also be credited back that $25 fee that they charged me for going over my limit. They were like sure, no problem. So that saves me almost $100, that made my morning. If only I could get some sleep I would have the rest of my day made.
current mood:  cranky
current music: Genitorturers - I Touch Myself (2 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, March 6th, 2001
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1:16 pm - We'll leave the lights on for ya...
I've busted my balls for around 9 hours this morning on my web site. I've been teaching myself how to design and program Flash and it's language ActionScript. I've been working hard core the entire time this morning. Everyone should go check and see what I've done. [warnerves.com] I'm very proud of myself. I'm very tired and achy too. Flash 5 rules.
It's been confirmed, I'm supposed to be moved into my little bachelor pad by the end of this month. I'm excited, I can't wait. I'm going to fix that place up so damn cool. ...of course with a little help from my friends as well.
I've been getting really good at pool lately. I beat my g/f's dad by like 3 or 4 balls. The thing is...he's really good at pool and I beat him so what's that say about my crazy, mad skills fool? I want to get on her dad's good side so he'll like me. I think he's cool as hell. I just hope that he has respect for me instead of disgust towards me for beating the snot out of him in pool. :oD
Well, I'm going to go to sleep for a while now. My friend Dustin wants me to go to his LAN party tonight. I hope I feel up to dragging this monster computer over to his house though. Mmmm, rest now I will. Decide later I will, mmm. The force is strong with my computer.
current mood:  nerdy
current music: Ozzy Osbourne - No More Tears (4 comments | comment on this)
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Friday, March 2nd, 2001
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7:06 am - A big day!...
Today is Danielle and I's one month anniversary! It seems like we've known each other for a lot longer than we really have. I love what's happened and I eagerly await what's to come.
I love you, babe.
current mood:  grateful
current music: Naked Eyes - Always Something There To Remind Me (1 comment | comment on this)
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Wednesday, February 28th, 2001
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4:08 am - I'M ALIVE!!!...well, sort of...
My throat is killing me. My throat feels like it's splitting inside my neck. I think I can even taste blood in my mouth. I hate the irony taste of blood, yuck. I hate this, it's taking forever for the sickness to reach it's climax. I wish it could just kick my ass and get it all over with.
I'm supposed to be up in less than 2 hours to go to breakfast with my mom...she has conferences in Anderson this week so she's going to actually be home till Friday.
Insomniac Music Theater....have to love that.
brb, I'm going to go splash cold water on my face and grab my Tool DVD.
ok, I'm back now. Mmm...hot oatmeal feels really good on my throat.
I love Tool so much. Ozzy, Tool, and Pantera can never be touched by any other band. A few have come close though. Tool's videos are, by far, the best ever made.
I'm having troubles with the design of my web site. I can't get it to look a certain way. I have a feeling that I'm going to have to start getting in gear and do the things I've really been needing to do. Such as reformat my hard drive and get rid of some little problems I've been having, install Macromedia Flash and teach myself how to make cool media, install a newer version of Macromedia Dreamweaver that I have, burn my collection of mp3s to discs, work on more graphics for my site, learn Perl and JavaScript really well, and a lot more shit. I really need to stop dicking around and find a job. I have to stop relying on others so much. It's really rude for me to do that. I need to be strong and ambitious so I can buy things that can own me (Fight Club prop).
Danielle, it's difficult for me to tell you this but I have to sooner or later. So here it goes...your dad's Laz-E-Boy is having my baby. Maybe if it didn't have a telephone,and a refrigerator and it couldn't heat up and vibrate things could have been different...lol
"I don't want it, I just need it to breathe, to feel, to know I'm alive." - Tool
As I finish this journal entry I still feel empty for some reason, usually I feel warm and complete and happy that I've written something. This time, however...
I'm out.
current mood: nihilistic
current music: Tool - Stinkfist (4 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, February 20th, 2001
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4:07 am - Mid-morning madness...
My pet gargoyle thought it would be funny to glue my balls to my recliner when I fell asleep at my computer. That was real damn funny, let me tell you. What did I do? I glued his wings to his ears. Fly around now, motherfucker.
*sits and watches "Body by Jake" infommercial because nuts are glued to chair and I'm going nowhere.*
ROTFL!!!
Don't ask.
current mood: chipper
current music: Deftones - Pink Maggit (6 comments | comment on this)
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3:20 am
I finally got one of my best buds to join...Dustin (sylint_deth). He's almost as big as a stud as I am...close but no cigar.
I redesigned and error-checked my site's guest book about 4 times today because I goofed up last night on it. It works and looks great now, great so I think. People, I urge you to sign it...but please think before you put something you and I will both regret. I want to make my web site public worthy. I promise I'll get that multi-user forum up soon. I'll try to do some brainstorming and testing to make it a little spicier looking.
I love the freedom of speech! I'm going to go to Indy tomorrow and look for a new issue of 2600 magazine. That magazine is freedom at it's finest.
I need to go now and polish my resume so I can get a decent job.
-You can pick your friends...you can pick your nose...but don't pick your friend's nose.-
current mood:  indifferent
current music: Zombie Nation - OhOhOh (1 comment | comment on this)
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Monday, February 19th, 2001
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4:52 am - crank up the damn music...
Just letting everyone know I'm still alive.
Today was an odd day...I was cranky as hell for no reason. That's ok, that's how most of my weeks are unless I'm with my hotty Danielle (ninjachicken). I finally got her to sign up and write to LiveJournal. Damn, that was like pulling teeth...lol. Anyway... I went to Broad Ripple earlier and ate with my mom and her friend. After eating I flipped the TV to Mtv to watch Jackass. My mom bitched until the show started because she hates Mtv. It turns out that she laughed her ass off after watching both episodes of Jackass that were on. Now that is a feat.
Web site update: I worked on my site a little bit tonight. I added a guest book and changed the color scheme of the site slightly. It's coming along nicely, but slowly.
warnerves.com
Well I'm tired and I have to get up in the morning and call a client about doing his company's web site and I want to get some rest so I can spend some quality time with my baby doll. Hopefully I'll be in a much better mood tomorrow.
current mood: tired
current music: Rage Against the Machine - Killing in the Name (4 comments | comment on this)
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Saturday, February 10th, 2001
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7:48 am - Saturday morning mind-numbing randomness...
Last night, Danielle and I went to see Hannibal in the Applewood 9 theater. The place was pretty full so we had to practically sit on top of the screen. Hannibal was awesome. The leading lady's acting was a tad on the shady side though. Ray Liotta was spectacular in it, but of course, it was Ray Liotta we're talking about here...more notable from his role as the mobster in Goodfellas. I give the movie an 8. Very good, I'm pleased. My company was great as well.
Random tale hack: As the mouse attempted to dislodge the thorn from the lion's paw I quickly step in the cage, grabbed the mouse by the tail, and ate it. The lion just stared in horror. I kicked the lion in the paw where the thorn was, only to force the thorn further into the paw. Full of pain and shock, the lion ralphed onto the ground. Where did he spew you ask? Well folks, he warfed right on my Nikes. I can't get that stain out.
The preceding was brought to you by the letter "S". "S" standing for sick. Plus I'm extremely tired, don't ask about what I write, it just comes off the top of my head. Don't hate me because I'm beautiful, hate me because I ran over your dog and laughed about it.
Don't worry children, I'll be ok once I take my medicine. *Searches blindly feeling with hands for the little, orange bottle half-way filled with brain-numbing pills to make me "better".*
current mood:  weird
current music: Tokyo Ghetto Pussy - I Kiss Your Lips (6 comments | comment on this)
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Thursday, February 8th, 2001
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2:06 pm - Losing friends by the minute...
So often have I thought of ending things quickly with a gun and such. It becomes more serious now. Pain drives me to search for something readily available. How many pills does it take to get to the cold, dark center of the body? I don't know, let's find out. 1...2...3...
Don't listen to me. It's not like I'd actually do that. I have too much to live for...Danielle, WarNerves.com, my future even. Merely thoughts they are, just that and nothing more.
Today's sick of: I'm sick and fucking tired of people saying one thing and doing another. I'm also sick of people putting their noses where they don't belong. If something is none of your business then keep it that way, you weren't meant to have anything to do with it in the beginning anyway. I'm speaking of some more than others...I appreciate those who care but when it goes further than that then it becomes gratuitous ignorance.
And now for something completely different (Monty Python plug):
I update my site bit by bit almost everyday. For the past couple of days I've been creating and designing skeleton programs so it'll be easier to add pages and and programs when I need to add them. Sometimes I'll work on it offline just to tweak some of the design and schemes. Soon I'll install a message board (forum) so people can just spout off about different things. That may even give me further ideas on what to do next on the web site.
Today I wrote a little JavaScript function and threw on the main page of my site...so when anyone clicks on the gargoyle a small alert box will come up and tell the person the current progress of the web site. If anyone has any suggestions, comments, or any corrections to tell me about feel free to use the e-mail address at the bottom of the web site's current main page.
Lately, a few people have been urging me to download MSN Messenger Service so I did. If anyone wants to add me to their buddy list on there my handle is warnerves@hotmail.com. Feel free to drop me a line anytime when I'm online.
Well, I think I'm done shooting the shit for now. I think I'll work on my web site some more so I can eventually put it up this freaking decade.
current mood: numb
current music: Black Label Society - Phoney Smiles And Fake Hellos (3 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, February 6th, 2001
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12:21 am - Jesus was a blood donor...
It started out with me waking up at my mom's friend's house in Indy on the comfy couch at a little past 5am. They left for work and I ate some Cheerios and look through yesterday's paper. I really didn't see anything I liked in the jobs section. I then got my shoes and coat on and left to go home. I got home and chatted and dicked around with my site for a bit...the gargoyle picture on my web site is one that I took and edited...I'm pretty proud of that one...that pic was taken with my bad-ass web cam...I'm loving that. At around 3:45pm my girlfriend (Danielle; g/f since February 2nd) came over and we sat and talked about a few things then we left. We went to Karma, Barnes and Noble, and to the Castleton Square mall. I had such a great time with her, I had so much fun. I got a teddy bear wearing bondage from Spencers in the mall...it's hilarious. I got the Tool box set today!!! It's about damn time. I had it ordered for about a month...I knew it had to take forever to find one. The Tool box set with the DVD is out of print already and was only made for a couple weeks I think. I now have a couple dollars left to my credit card now...the limit is $600...you do the math. Danielle and I eventually came back here for a little while and just chilled. Just sitting around with her is great. I love her.
current mood: excited
current music: Iggy Pop - Real Wild Child (Wild One) (9 comments | comment on this)
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Friday, February 2nd, 2001
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11:59 am - Ta da!!!...
Well kiddies, it's up! ~WarNerves.com~ I haven't really had time to work on it so just stay tuned for lots of stuff to come.
For those of you who know me on Yahoo Messenger as "goodnookie", I've switched to my other handle "WarNerves" for good.
For those of you who know me on AOL Instant Messenger, I've registered the handle "WarNerves007" but I may or may not switch to that one for a while. I'm waiting for the person that has "WarNerves" so I can try to persuade them into giving it to me. They haven't been on at all since I have so this person may not even exist anymore.
For those of you who know me on ICQ...don't hold your breathe for me to come on there anytime soon, it may be a cold day in Hell before you see me on there.
current mood:  loved
current music: Marilyn Manson - Disposable Teens (comment on this)
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Thursday, February 1st, 2001
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4:44 am - Dude! Sweet!...
No one told me that I got my friend Travis (mellow23) to sign up to LJ. That's awesome. I feel sooo...accomplished and....well utterly retarded for buying so much shit I don't need with all the money that I don't have. Yeah, you all know what I'm talking about, the credit card. Nothing else so diabolical and devious exists. So how did you like that transition between my friend and the credit card situation? Nice, huh?
Want to know something I just realized? I just realized that some people hold on to things for waaaay too long. *ahem, ahem* Almost to the point of breakdown. Just take a deep breathe and let it all out. Realize that the sun will come out tomorrow no matter what happens. Nothing is as valuable as one's happiness and nothing should ever stand in the way of a person's dreams.
I'm ready for my close-up, Mr. Deville.
current mood: awake
current music: George Gershwin - Rhapsody in Blue (6 comments | comment on this)
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Wednesday, January 31st, 2001
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11:19 am - Squeeze me? Bacon powder?...
Well I've done it! I picked my domain name and I registered it. I also rented space on server. So in a couple of days when the domain name is configured with the web server I'll be up and running at warnerves.com. BornByAccident.com may be soon to follow. Stay tuned here and I'll let you all know when the site is up...it won't have much on it but it will be operational.
I have to tell everyone else of friends that I've had start an LJ account. So far I've made Amanda (sunshineprncss), Sara (torturedangel56), and Gabe (skinflint) sign up. There will be more to come. Oh yes...many more. Muahahaha...
current mood: accomplished
current music: Genitorturers - I Touch Myself (2 comments | comment on this)
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