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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
form over function's LiveJournal:
| Saturday, November 29th, 2003 | |
| 6:23 pm | so i just got the mail and there was a letter from Sears. Surprisingly, they've offered me a retail management internship for next summer. $12 fucking dollars an hour! I thought the interview went decent, but there were definitely some things i noticed that i wanted to work on, so i'm really surprised. You work at a regular Sears location, so I could either end up in Gainesville or at home with my parents (which would super blow). It sounds great and all, but the problem is that they're first come, first serve, so i have to make my decision in the next few days. With New York's job market being so tight, the best way to get a job after school is to intern with the company. I no more want to work for Sears than shit, so I would be missing out on the opportunity to intern with a company i'd really like to work for (like a designer) and making it harder to get a job offer from them when i graduate. The plus is that an internship in retail management may look good to a designer, as obviously that's the business they're involved in. Another consideration, however, is graduate school. You have to get in with a powerhouse company right off the bat if you want them to pay for your grad school (otherwise i'm stuck with an $80,000 bill), and most of the students getting into ivy league mba programs (which is where i want to be) are coming out of said powerhouses. After talking meeting with my dad's friend the other day (the wall street guy), its becoming increasingly apparent that i'm gonna have to make a decision between doing what i really want to do and being exceedingly wealthy. I suppose one consideration is that no matter what job i get, its never gonna be as enjoyable as my free time. Its always gonna have an element of suck to it, so maybe i should just take the money and retire early...reaaaaaly early. its times like this i wish i had a trust fund so i wouldn't have to worry about this shit... Current Mood:  confusedCurrent Music: uf vs fsu |
| Sunday, November 16th, 2003 | |
| 12:43 pm | my week in one lj entry or less yeah, so i'm back in gainesville already. i wish i could have gotten back sooner. my week, though you don't care, went like this: Monday. Test review for stats. I only need a 70, but i haven't done anything since i finished the last test since i went. Its at a hotel. The hotel has a bar. Apparently its socially acceptable to drink whilst attending a test review. I learned the basics of multiple regression, and that Newcastle makes test reviews a lot better. Teusday. Get up, wash car because if i bring home another dirty car, i feel i may be disowned. Drive home, hang with the rents...blah. Wednesday. Go thrifting. Got more stuff for other people than i did for myself. Took my mom to Wal-Mart to pic out fabric for my closet curtain--white with block dots. Total mod, total hotness. Everyone else gets home. i go over to brendan's, there's all these high school kids there. I don't know when they started following us around. Everyone says, "let's go to Denny's," as that's the place where we hang out. I say, lets play pool first. I didn't really want to play pool, they just have a bar there. Brandon had 5 rum and cokes before i even got there. We sat and drank (and smoked, as you can't do either 'round the rents" as everyone else went and got ice cream--tee hee. Then it was out to Denny's. Our favorite waitress quit. I don't want to talk about it... Thursday. thanksgiving dinner with the rents, then the bar again. $12 buckets of corona and pool bitch. Down to brandon's, more beer, then a marathon session at denny's. Sharing samplers, the whole nine. Friday. Got a meeting with that wall street guy who's helping me with internships. My dad rode the harley to work, i picked him and the dude up in the honda and we went over to city place. the guy's a fucking multi-multi millionaire and he has the same damn exact x5 as my dad. my dad says millionaires are cheap. this guy definitely is. he's sitting there telling me stories about his friend that was secretary of the treasurey under clinton, and how he discussed Dubya's "economic policy" (that's in quotes to be fecetios...get it?) with Dubya's daddy and Barb. They say its all about who you know. I'm glad i know this guy... drop them off and head back to city place. I can't afford anything, but i go anyway to fucking tempt myself for some dumb reason. This one place has Von Dutch now. My pants suddenly tightened for some reason...I keep saying to myself "don't spend any money, don't spend any money." But then, printed on a modest sign in the door of Mr. Cole's establishment, i see the words "Kenneth Cole Shoe Sale,"--four of the greatest words in our little language. I broke down and bought some pretty blue reactions. They've got kind of a baseball cleat thing going on on the bottom, but they're hot shit and on sale. Its very obvious that i had absolutely no choice but to buy them, we can all see that right? Then over to armanai exchange. I wanted everything, but i just got a black leather cuff on sale. Buy now, pay later! After that, party at Brandon's. High school kids galore. Sadness, majorly. They were daring people to do dumb shit--I'm it might be illegal for me to see a 17 year-old girl in just her bra and underwear. I hung outside most of the time because it was gay, but he's my boy so i had to show up. Brandon got dared to kiss some guy and he did it...he's officially gay now. After that, stopped at the beach at 1am and headed home. I changed into my boardshorts to be more comfy...mistake! A cold front came through and i was huddled in a corner freezing my ass off at every rest stop. I was so psyched to be home though. This morning woke up and made a quick $100 parking cars--all Noles...What i learned is this: if you wait till an hour before the game, everyone just goes straight there. IF you do it 3 and a half before, everyone sits in your driveway tailgating and asking to use your bathroom every 5 minutes. this is all punctuated by the constant "woooooo!!!"s. football fever. catch it... Current Music: stephen malkmus-"pink indiea" |
| 12:43 pm | THUG LIFE BITCH, I AIN'T GOIN OUT LIKE THAT Saturday night Cecilia and I went to see the Tupac movie. Cecilia's cousin at mtv worked on it (third name in the credits), and I've been a Pac fan since Digital Underground, so we decided to hit that shit up. Before the movie even started, some rap video extra was blabbing on her cell phone and someone told her to shut the fuck up. A full 5 minutes later, some 50 cent wannabe 30 feet away decided that even though no one was talking to him, he was gonna prove his manhood and started yelling, in his best lil' wayne accent, "yo, who told me to shut up? I'll fuck yo ass up nigga, best believe." Most were just impressed at how enormous his balls must be, as one must undoubtedly be exceptionally gifted in the pants to make vague threats to a nameless, faceless offender in a pitch dark movie theater, particularly when they weren't even talking to you. I however, remembered why I had wanted to wait until it came out on video, as I had left my "gat" in my other jeans and they didn't teach us very much about fighting back in prep school. Once the movie startd though, everyone quieted down and it was pretty good. Its kind of creepy because the entire thing is Pac telling you his life story in his own words. By the end, you almost forget he's gone. I enjoyed it. There were some missing details relating to puff, big, and suge concerning the shootings, but I woulnd't want to piss off Suge and Puff either, so i can understand. Yesterday, i spent a good 6 hours in library west searching through 1000 page books full of nothing but numbers and statistics. If you ever want to know how many children of unwed latina mothers qualify for free lunch in collier county, check out the U.S. Census Statistical Abstract of Florida--its the most thrilling read since Where the Red Fern Grows... Current Music: captain beefheart and his magic band - trout mask replica lp |
| Friday, November 14th, 2003 | |
| 9:44 am | every night with my star friends... Woke up this morning feeling great. On time, without my alarm even, and cuddled up in the cozy quilt my mom made me. I realized it was cold as ass outside, and even better, it finally occurred to me that today is only friday. then i remembered the economist journal-quality paper i have due in six days--the one i haven't even finished preliminary research for. Looks like I'll be up in Library west all day. Yesterday was the first day of presentations for the paper and some bitch stole my topic. Now i have to at least one-up her if i want a decent grade. I guess the bright side is that at least i get to use library west for this one. I am amazed that its actually possible to close a fucking college library for 2 to 3 years, let alone one that serves over 47,000 students. In six months I'll start work on my thesis, possibly two, and i won't be able to browse a fucking shelf. Instead, i'll just have to determine from the ten word description in the on-line catalogue if the book is what i'm looking for and wait 24 hours to have the book shipped. I read an article yesterday where a graduate student estimated she found 75% of the sources she used for her papers by browsing the shelves. Yeah, fuck you very much UF... Current Music: tracy and the plastics-"city" |
| Saturday, November 8th, 2003 | |
| 5:00 am | "these guys will work for peanuts...literally. i mean, just look how skinny they are." am i the only one who recognizes a band from my cd collection in every other commercial on television? i guess ad agencies finally realized you can buy like nine million indie songs for the same price as one rolling stones' one... I knowingly slept through class on teusday, and then through my professor's office hours this morning. i was awake and all, i just didn't feel like getting up. and when i went to bed, i wasn't even tired, i just didn't feel like being awake anymore. i give me an inch and i take a mile. i'm never gonna learn, and i can't be trusted. no more sleep for me mister... Current Music: sufjan stevens-"all good naysayers, speakup!..." |
| Wednesday, November 5th, 2003 | |
| 7:11 am | That was Jesus on the phone. He hung up because he didn't like your tone... I have nine classes left--all 4 credits apiece--spread over 3 semesters. Three of these are tv replay/internet classes and in addition, these are the only three that the notes companys do notes and/or reviews for. An intelligent person would probably take one of these replay classes per semester until they graduate, spreading their benefits evenly over the remainder of their college career. However, there's a certain synergystic effect from taking them all at once--from never having to watch a single class replay, let alone attend the live section or write a single line of notes for an entire semester. Just buy the notes, study for a few days, and show up to three or four tests. Currently I have to show up to one class twice a week for two hours. Making it there is really kicking my ass, so i'm looking forward to what promises to be the best semester ever...followed by the two worst semesters ever... Current Music: jad fair and dainel johnston-"melody" |
| Sunday, November 2nd, 2003 | |
| 3:54 pm | jeff's house:  complete with a hollister card to cut it...don't worry, its not real--we're not that cool... Most people totally got the jack tripper costume, and there was plenty of pro-Tripper sentiments, so my "ode to ritter" was a success. my dad bought my mom a motorcycle the other day...fuckin' weird. that means that all we have to do is sell my truck and the honda stays mine...except no one has called about the truck. we're putting it on ebay, so if that doesn't work, i'm stuck with the truck again and we sell the car...fuckin balls in a rare instance of modesty, i decided to play the new tony hawk underground on "normal" mode instead of the highest skill level, as i didn't consider myself to be a "master." Three days later, i beat it, so unless this is your first tony hawk, i recommend you not make the same mistake. Unfortunately, this is the worst hawk since the original (and you couldn't even manual in that shit). You have to play as some random wanker kid instead of my man geoff rowley, and most of the levels are pretty small and weak. The only cool thing is that now you can get off your board and walk places or climb shit. You can jump off your board mid-trick and keep your combo going until the little walking timer runs out, which comes in handy when your manual is running out of steam and you need some speed. other than that, 4 was lightyears beyond in every respect. what a disappointment... something that wasn't a disappointment is my new maddens. they came and they fuckin' rule. i went through apple's site for 25 minutes yesterday just trying to find who i email to ask if and when they're releasing an 80 gig iPOD. we learned in marketing that what seperates a "need" from a "want" depends wholly on you. if you convince yourself you can't live without it, then it becomes a need...I NEED AN 80 GIG iPOD... Current Music: lazarus-"untitled" |
| Tuesday, October 28th, 2003 | |
| 1:21 am | she started dancing to that fine fine music, you know her life was saved by rock and roll... Tonight, i went into a bar and purchased my first ever legal drink. It seems like such a small thing, but dammit if it wasn't the best drink i've ever had. And believe me, i've had a lot. I hate birthdays, so don't respond to this all "happy birthday," because its just a day. All it means is that my parents had sex 21 years and 9 months ago. Birthdays are only important to me when my rights as an american citizen are extended, and in that sense, this is the biggest day since those dumb bastards let me have a drivers license... when i got home, mo and jo had a lite brite on my bed with the official "birthday cake" picture on it. That's probably the most perceptive gift i've ever gotten, as I've been scouring thrift shops for years looking for one, and I'd venture to guess that I've nary pronounced my affinity for them more times than i could count on one hand. You wish your roommates were half as cool...or hot... anyway, i swear to god this song fucking changed my life... Current Music: the velvet underground-"rock n' roll" |
| Monday, October 27th, 2003 | |
| 2:55 pm | i'm the operator of my pocket calculator. blip bloop, beeeeeeep.... new shoes are good. new shoes for $15 are even better. The great thing about steve madden is that if you like another designer's shoes, just wait two months and madden will copy them. Wait two more and they'll be 60% off. And if you can hang on for just one last month, they'll be like $20. Hence my six pairs... I learned more in the five hour and 45 minute stats tutor review yesterday than i have in three days of studying. $20 well spent... Current Music: minor threat-"look back and laugh" |
| Saturday, October 25th, 2003 | |
| 1:29 am | hey, i don't come down to your work and knock the dick out of your mouth... at cecilia's bidding, i watched High Fidelity for the first time tonight. I don't know why everyone keeps recommending love stories to me. I watch enough love stories already--they're called pornography. As per the movie, i've decided the song i want played at my funeral is the 38 minute version of "sister ray" from the quine tapes. Not that its my favorite song (though the vu, atdi, and joy division continuously jockey for the prestigious position of "my favorite band"), I just want everyone to have to sit through a song longer than the majority of the records in their mediocre music collections...You say you don't have the time time? Too busy suckin' on a ding dong? Too bad, i'm dead and you're just gonna have to deal... anyway, now that my headache's gone, i'm ready to rock...and by rock, i mean something that has absolutely nothing to do with rock--studying... Current Music: the danielson famile-"like a vacuum" |
| Thursday, October 23rd, 2003 | |
| 12:07 am | this chris's birthday, why not give the gift of bad new wave/guns n' roses vinyl... jeff's right, girls do shamelessly oggle you when you wear a suit to campus. they stare at us in suits the way we stare at them in like, absolutely anything they happen to be wearing... on october 28th, three things will happen: 1. i will turn 21 and be of legal age to purchase alcohol. 2. tony hawk underground will be released and i will purchase it. 3. i will drop or fail out of college due to a combination of numbers 1 and 2. Current Music: throbbing gristle-"dead on arrival" |
| Saturday, October 18th, 2003 | |
| 4:38 pm | so bad, but sooooooooo good... oh my god, i just want to put $50 in an envelope and send it to freezepop for being the best band ever in the world... Current Music: the new books cd |
| Tuesday, October 14th, 2003 | |
| 3:37 am | I have three little rivet shaped bruises on each of my hips. non-stretch jeans blow. Q and Not U refuses to play "a line in the sand" the album way and that really dumps sand in my vagina...in the figurative sense those loveable scamps from black eyes forgot to label their EP. In the spirit of brevity, they made both sides appear to have music on them, so as to confuse the unwitting consumer. look at me, i'm slapping my knee over here... my nirvana cd is skipping, and this is the third copy i've had since it came out. and to think, this medium replaced vinyl... Current Music: nirvana |
| Saturday, October 11th, 2003 | |
| 10:07 am | awww man brendan, this totally sucks for you.... We always knew it'd be eric, but we never thought it'd take till 2014 for you guys to get together, hahahahha... My dad called yesterday. One of his customers is big shit on wall street and is also big into helping kids out. Ever heard of Michael Milken? Check your finance book--he started and popularized the trade of junk bonds back in the day and made a few hundred million bucks off it. This guy was his boss. Anyway, he's working on an internship for me in NYC now. If this work's out, i'm pretty much set for life. I can probably even stay with some relatives in Connecticut, so no need to talk my dad into paying triple my current rent so as to work a job that in no way benefits him. Not only does their son have a job on Wall Street and commutes every day (free ride), but Jordan will be interning in the city as well and living in Jersey so i'll have someone to hang out with. As if that's not good enough, this guy is close friends with the board of governors and selection committee at Penn, arguably the best business school on the planet, and my dream since i was 4. Not only could he almost ensure my acceptance to the MBA program with a phone call, but he regularly gives out $10,000 interest free loans to kids such as myself. But even if this all doesn't work out, my dad's still actively trying to get me an internship in NYC for next summer. He's not too excited about me wanting to move out of state, and even less about me moving to the city, so this is a big step. Not that that would have stopped me, but since he pays the bills, it would have kept me away until graduation at least. I don't know why he even bothers expressing distaste with my decisions, he always just lets me do whatever i want anyway... its not like there was ever a doubt, we all know i was made for that city... Current Music: devo-"mongoloid" |
| Friday, October 10th, 2003 | |
| 6:39 am | "in that hat, you look not as much like george straight, as george gay" 7 hour Queer Eye marathon tonight beginning at 9pm! screw you guys, i've got plans tonight... |
| 2:26 am | a sign of the apocalypse i just saw a cradle of filth video on fucking mtv...that's a kitschy american black metal band for those of you who aren't into the whole death/black/doom/sludge metal scene...seriously, mtv's done some fucked up shit, but i think they've finally run out of ideas... Current Mood:  drunkCurrent Music: slayer on fucking mtv... |
| Thursday, October 9th, 2003 | |
| 3:52 am | mutherfuck the ring mommy kiss the chain Jen lowered my earses tonight. Truthfully, I didn't even need a haircut yet, but i went anyway...appointment, you know? They should have some kind of referral discount or something in there, because i've gotten her like 80 new clients and i'm an impovershed lad who could use a free cut. We went a little shorter this time, so now I've reached my goal of looking like the guy in the giant picture at the front of abercrombie. I realized me and Nick Leche have the same haircut. Let's hope it doesn't attract me some trailer park skank like his did... I'm in one of those, "so this is all my life has to offer right now?" moods. I'm not about sitting around with my thumb up my asswaiting 'til i graduate and move north to have some fun. Plus i have all these neat outfits and nowhere to wear them...I need some new friends, and with my 21st comin' up soon, drinking buddies. Unboring ones, 'cause i'm tired of watching trading spaces on friday and saturday night because everyone stayed in to play fucking taboo. I'll get on all that once i have every cd ever in the world that's good, 'cause i'm not sure how much longer they're gonna continue to give those things out for free ya know? i'm in a sporting mood too. you're probably laughing, but don't get it twisted--jv football, starting varsity hockey what. I think we're going to southwest tomorrow--hit the treadmill, do the rock wall, maybe play some raquetball or basketball. I'd like to play some soccer too, or some punk rock kickball, 'cause i'm the shit at kickball. We should get some games going, 'cause nothing's funnier than pasty white scene kids out of their element. As soon as i get some damn money, i'm gonna start going rock climing with the girls too. As soon as i get a ton of damn money, i'm gonna start playing paintball again. My dad sent me $180 towards my credit card balance today so that could be sooner than i thought. Current Music: cass mccombs-"aids in africa" |
| Tuesday, October 7th, 2003 | |
| 2:52 am | so he was all, "why's it spelled speakerboXXX? Is big boi claimin' edge now?" a world divided. sisters and brothers; mothers and fathers; nuns and gay amputee porn stars--all taking opposite sides in the most epic and important argument in human history...denim. Some don matching jackets and jeans, presenting a clean and consistent field of identical denim washes to the world--broken only by peaking shirt tales and collars. Others prefer contrasting denim shades, wearing unfaded dark jackets with whiskered light jeans, distressed dark jackets with hole-filled light jeans, or any other combination of the two...The issue was addressed on a recent episode of the wildly popular queer eye for the straight guy, when fashion guru carson recommended never matching one's denim, purporting that doing so would suggest the appearrance of a particularly color-coordinated farmer. others spout the mantra "always match your denim" as if it was as deeply ingrained in the "fashion commandments" as "brown belt, brown shoes" or "never button the top button." So who Wins? Who's right? Who reigns fashion supreme? The world may never know... Current Music: the soft machine-lullaby letter |
| Saturday, October 4th, 2003 | |
| 12:48 pm | so i guess one cool thing about my house is that when a repetitive car horn awakens me from a drunken stupor at 11:30 on a saturday morning, I can look outside and say "oh, we have a game today--free money." I had $5 in my wallet when i went to bed yesterday, now i have $20, so um, go gators...wait, that is what we're called right? Current Music: 1 mile north |
| 2:10 am | this is the last time you'll hear from a bad guy like me... i finally found the patch to get back on soulseek. mysteriously, it finally works correctly with my computer for the first time in a year and a half...i've been downloading like a bitch but all i really care about is that i finally scored the a.r.e. weapons full-length, a.k.a. the hottest fucking shit on earth. fuck the new books, the new quasi, the new new belle and sebastian--they haven't even hit my cd player yet 'cause this shit hot throwaway electroclash cd is owning my ass. i've never wanted to fuck and fight at the same time... scarface was fucking badass. now i see where every single rap song ever made stole their lyrics from...when i'm on top, i'm getting one of those "the world is yours" statues in my house... Current Mood: drunkCurrent Music: a.r.e. weapons-"bad news" |