i saw a pedestrian get hit by a car this afternoon.




and i felt nothing.

Feeling: empty

cue mopey goth mode.

Feeling: depressed

I've fallen...

no nets this time. just a long climb back.

don't expect too much of me in coming weeks, i've given enough of myself lately to last a lifetime.

did we just say goodnight and mean goodbye?

Feeling: crushed

l33t h4xx0r th34tr3!!!!! -> l33t pirates of the carribean

this is about as much as i can offer right now.

Feeling: drained

Someone in my office has just bought a new Nokia 6670 and wants the classic telephone sound on there. The manual that's come with the phone mentions nothing about ringtones pretty much, and when I use the software that comes with it and connected the phone via USB to my machine, I can only transfer midi files. And the way it converted the midi file makes it sound ultra shitty.

Help!

Phone my office (07)3847 9903 if you can help me, or just comment here!

(Alternatively, provide me with lots of telephone ringing sounds in midi format and i'll try them all!

no discernable talent.

not good enough at anything in particular. limited knowledge in many areas. nothing one could make a career of.

where am i going with my life?


what i thought re: takeover of the impromafia site, has come to fruition. toes have been stepped on a bit too much lately in many areas on my life and i just dont know how much more i can take of being second best for everything.

Feeling: crappy

( Lyrics... )

Feeling: meh

as expected, the safety nets i have built for myself are crumbling... and the rope i'm trying to walk is about to snap...

i'm going to fall...

Feeling: sad

Receiving a resume this morning from someone with this domain made me think of turner23.

Muwahahahah!

Feeling: amused

No matter what anyone says, Techno covers of Guns N Roses Songs are just WRONG.

Feeling: appalled

So now I have to do direct mail every fucking week, so I spend a great deal of my time spitting out spam effectively, on behalf of other people.

Lame.

It was ok when it was only every month or two, but every week! argh!

Full of scorn *shakes fist*

So I'm procrastinating here at work, find me on msn, you lava eet.

Will probably be at the pub tonight. I'm gunna need it. *sigh*

Where is my little book of calm?!

Havent spoken to T yet today, which is unusual.

Feeling: annoyed

Ask me anything, and I will endeavor to answer to the best of my ability...

Feeling: bouncy

Best Amazon guide ever.

Feeling: awake

I've been out with two cute bois over two nights. Ahh the joys of being single.

So I found this on ebay for any interested small women what go to raves. *chuckle*

Going to try to stay home tonight. Yes.

so as previously mentioned, the faint were fucking amazing last night! I finally understand what electra_femme has been going on about for all this time ;)

nightstick were supporting, and they rocked the crowd. they were pretty damn good.

i downed a couple of vodka and redbulls, got prepped and went to the front for the faint.. front row, yay!

and i must say, the energy and stage craft was dazzling :D worth more than the $40 i paid to go...

afterwards i hung back, to see if i could grab a setlist, only to find they dont use them and keep it all in their heads. I guess if you're playing the same show over so many cities all over the world, it gets a bit predictable.

went over to the merch counter where i had made a deal with the guy behind the counter so he'd hold onto the wet from birth LP for me, grabbed one, had a chat with the guy from Nightstick/Not from there..

Then Todd (singer from the faint) came out and I did the fan-girl thing for a bit, got my LP signed. Huzzah!

Went for $4 breakfast at fatrics but it wasnt on. Had a really bad pizza, then went to new york slice to compensate.

Ross and I went back home, whereby I chatted away on msn, with death to smoochy on the tv next to me.

Finally crashed out around 3, had some good sleep.. thinking about plans made for tonight.

*smile*

i <3 the faint.

back to work tomorrow, *sigh*.

it's been a fucking amazing holiday, and I'd like to thank everyone who helped make it so good... so thanks to Amaya, Tim, Simon, Pol, Jim, Kieran, Nat, Greg, Jess, Rod, Toby, Bridie and anyone else I've missed, thank you!

Feeling: thankful

the faint were fucking amazing live... more details to come :D

1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
I resigned from a job.

2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I can't remember making any, but if i did it was to regain full time employment, which i did.
Have made more for next year, mostly envolving health/exercise, with deadlines.

3. Did someone close to you give birth?
Alexia.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
I dont think so...

5. What countries did you visit?
Australia.

6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
sex, money, patience, travel, weight loss, fun

7. What dates from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
I'm not good with dates.. but some major events were:
-when i was put on anti-depressants
-when i got my current job despite still being employed at woolworths
-when i broke up with Jim
-when i met Tim
-timetunnel

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Overcoming mental health issues to get myself a decent job.

9. What was your biggest failure?
i dont know..

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
not really, minor injury to some muscle tissue around my knee but thats about it i think

11. What was the best thing you bought?
A new set of bedding, which inspired me to transform my room.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Jim, Tim.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled?
Ben, Claudette, Paul...

14. Where did most of your money go?
bills, rent, food and hairdye

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
things that arent going to happen

16. What song will always remind you of 2004?
Seether ft. Amy Lee - Broken

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or hardened? happier
ii. thinner or fatter? fatter
iii. richer or poorer? Richer...

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
had steamy sex, relaxed, sorted out my head

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
moping around the house

22. Did you fall in love in 2004?
no.

23. Any one-night stands?
no.

24. What was your favourite TV program?
queer as folk, queer eye for the straight guy

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
no.

26. What was the best book you read?
I'm really not sure.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
The Faint, Le Tigre, MC Chris

29. What did you want and not get?
Orgasms.

30. Favorite film of this year?
Harold & Kumar go to Whitecastle

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
on my birthday i went to work and they bought me a cake. I was 22.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
having lost all the weight i put on.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
chuck it on, add a jacket, its all good.

34. What kept you sane?
friends, family.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Gwen Stefani..

37. Who do you miss?
Toby, Jess, mum

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Tim, Ben, Gary...

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004:

you shouldnt need other people to have fun, holding on to your emotions instead of expressing them is detrimental to your health, dont worry so much about what other people think

Feeling: nostalgic

i'm back from my trip down south, which facilitated catching up with old friends and some serious relaxation.

still, i dont go back to work until the 11th of January, so more relaxation is in order.

the faint gig is on the 9th of January at the zoo, and in the mean time, catching up with various people (tm) is in order. I have (small) gifts for a couple of you.

in other news, im still utterly confused about certain situations. Even more so now. I'm in too deep and I need to find a way out before things get utterly painful and disasterous. *sigh*

Feeling: discontent

happy new year everyone!

I'm so excited and its amazing and delightful and I cant wait to kick start everything!

*bounce*

love to you all :D

A.

Feeling: bouncy