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joshua

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(17 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[01 Feb 2005|10:18am]
Money is your means of survival. The verdict you pronounce upon the source of your livelihood is the verdict you pronounce on your life. If the source is corrupt, then you have damned your own existance. Did you get your money by fraud? By pandering to fools, in the hope of getting more then your ability deserves? By lowering your standards? By doing work you despise for purchasers you scorn? If so, your money will not give a moment's or a penny's worth of joy. Then all things you buy will become not a tribute to you, but a reproach.
-ayn rand

(6 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[27 Jan 2005|11:17pm]
"but you dont care do you?" his eyes looked on unapologetically.
"no, it is all true. i continue to ask yet your answer is not welcome. i fell nothing for how or why you are."
"that is it?"
"yes, and you stand there as if to goad me, break me, for what?"
"i do not have a motive."
"you still ask." i sneer.
"and?"
"it insults me that you bring up motive."
"but i am just standing there, my eyes walk about the pastries, i am there to find sweets and you are there to find money."
"but what of signifigance? i devote the best parts of my day attending to your needs, inquiring of you, smiling for you, and as of yet i have not felt satisfied, just wages."

(5 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[12 Jan 2005|07:26pm]
library again. rummaging in thoughts to try to post something. it is 727 and my car wont start so a friend is on his way to get me. i should have sold this car when i had the chance. who knows if it will start again. currently plodding on with spanish and german at once, tho i admit to more spanish then the later. some practice with telemundo with captions, funny television.

read about the idea of foreign combatants and how, if fighting for the iraqis then they are considered outside of the Geneva conventions. so they are swallowed up in a loophole and the CIA decides to tell the NY Times that they[the ones abducted] are not in Guantanamo but will not disclose where.

How is a foreign invading force[i.e. the US Military] not an illegal combatant, why are we allowed saftey under Geneva?

If we hold sanctions against Cuba, how do we have a base there?

Maybe the answers are easy, I surely don't know them. Reading the newspaper is generally a bad idea for me anyhow, riles me up.

My internet time is up, so I am going to read some Neruda.

+

(25 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[21 Dec 2004|12:28am]
in the interest of putting words to page:

5 degrees yesterday as i left work, a full day of snow tho no large piles of snow. russian-esqe hat pulled down tight over sweatshirt-and-jacketed shoulders, thinsulate heavy gloves, overalls. snowflake laden beard and small thoughts while trudging down the hill trying not to slip.
-
reading The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich by Shirer and it is proving to be a great book. finally, i feel like i know something about world war2. spending lots of my nights with friends playing video games or watching movies, cooking tons of potluck food, playing music and dreaming of summer tour and warmth. just getting a few thoughts out to those of you that i know and dont, to keep warm and smiling, i hope to hear from all of you soon.

(20 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[03 Nov 2004|11:48am]
attention all canadian friends. need a life partner? i am sure there are plenty of us running for the hills.

dont snub the shrub.

over and out.

(10 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[30 Oct 2004|10:46am]
it is drizzling grey today. not too cold, they say fifty but i still kept my hands in my pockets with elbows pulled in tight. integrity and exodus, current muse words. everything is hinging on them. im writing to renew a connection with myself, and that with others. even when there isn't much to say, the chance at communication is always available.

i'll just walk some more today, and hope to be called on by friends. that comes off morose, but its really a state of waiting contentment. no problems, no spikes, so sags.

Waiting is.

(5 assasins | shoot the mindset)

tell the captain hi for me [14 Oct 2004|04:49pm]
so, my backpack was stolen which includes everyones phone number and address.

be dears and call my house and leave all of your contact information

603.659.1823

if not, go back a few entries, pick up my address, and write something///


thanks and goodluck

(15 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[08 Oct 2004|12:43pm]
in my dream last night i spoke spanish to a man that was picking on the girl i was with. in spanish he said that she had the nose of a pig. when i woke up i realized i should have told the guy off, about how beautiful she was, but it seemed like something i was saying to impress the girl more then just how i felt.
-
everything has been well at the apartment aside from a lack of visitors, change that. ive had bad gas for what feels like 2 weeks. on orders from a friend I have started, and enjoy, The Fountainhead.

recent reads:
Dandelion Wine
100 Years of Solitude
Fightclub
-
my motivation has been the pits. not writing, not sticking to my exercise ideas, not finishing and mailing letters on some semblance of schedule.
-
but at times, i laugh as hard as ever.

(16 assasins | shoot the mindset)

moving [14 Sep 2004|11:58am]
so right now i am preparing my final move, and will be settled there from tonight until i leave in april.

contact me through snail, email, and telephone:

joshua hale
116 main st apt5
newmarket nh

destroycctv@yahoo.com

603.659.1823

(shoot the mindset)

WS cutup [08 Sep 2004|09:11pm]
with life he never more sprung up.
we had our being and our birth.
thou camest, how tended on: but rest
though willingly i came to denmark,
this present day he is deliver'd?
that tender spray did sweetly spring,
shall warwick cut the sea to france,
himself does fly? he loves us not;
an issue i might propagate,
'tis nourish'd: the fire i' the flint

(shoot the mindset)

! use your head ! [08 Sep 2004|06:50pm]
mishaps of myriad mishaped metals marking monsterous
forces fighting forever forget forgive forgoe
new nanos and neo neurologies nix narcisist
thought trails twinkling towards token trajectories
rise rise release recover rewind replay
bol bloody botched bouts beyond being
sorry shit sacks sinking slow surrender
undertow underfoot underhanded ubiquitous
cat calls circumventing cyclic circutry
destroying decent days diving deep discovering
abandoned analects and analysts anticedent
power packs prefering plutos pitiful
grip grabbing gaseous geographic
worlds wondering why
?why the fuck why?

(2 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[04 Sep 2004|11:37pm]
sin dios tattoo
bridge jumping
bicycles
jamaican food
warrior king
lee perry

we are not inherently sinful of nature.
without god we will do good for the sake of good.

saw some great kids get married and ccant help but feel that is a step in the opposite direction i am heading. too real life, make any sense?

love those around you

green//brown//red

(37 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[10 Aug 2004|07:42am]
'calcutta, childhood sticks' available from MC Press. it is a 24 page quarter-size zine by matthew[lj:farmerpoverty] and myself. it is musings on childhood. he is really pumping these out so if you would like one drop me a comment or email to destroycctv@yahoo.com

-started a series of envelopes based on butterflies and banners. it is going well.
-ideas abound of entering school for biology. i swear i have a new idea every day, every hour.
-i have created the terrible habit of waking up and turning off the alarm and know its exactly because i try to cut my sleep to close to the time i want to get up. all in all, i need to just start getting more sleep?
-pick up the new Neurosis album, The Eye of Every Storm, if you haven't yet.

(shoot the mindset)

[04 Aug 2004|06:08pm]
I feel great.

But the pick axe has seen better days. Between me and my boss working at this large area, and consequently, spending about 2 hours straight wailing on stone, the handle split, and finally broke all the way through. It is tiring. The axe gets heavy. Rocks are hard to shovel. I wish I was doing this everyday. Quarry worker, who wants that? Do they even use picks anymore? Completely doubtful. In talking during the rock splitting:
"Imagine the old farmers, doing this for acres."

Simple things put life and the past into perspective.

(11 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[04 Aug 2004|07:57am]
i have 108 friends on here. certain people will find that funny.
-
At work I spent part of the day digging up old sod with a pick axe. There is a lot of ledge under the grass, about 3 inches in. At first I found this to be a pain the neck, every other swing blam! and the hands ringing from steel on rock. Then it became a blessing. In trying to lift a rock out with my accidently hits dead on leaving gunpowder blasts and smoke tendrils I found that with enough swing you could split the rocks. This was hard, and enjoyable. It was what I wanted from summer's work. Hard, sweat laden and honest.
-
As I work the greenhouse toiling in bright unobscured sun my farmers tan gets worse[or better, you decide] by the moment. A friend said I look like a little kid because of it. My hair every summer spent in the sun will lighten, and then darken back up in the fall. My arm hairs are a bleached golden color, and this amuses me.
-
I have not been writing much, but I am content with that.
-
Much the only time I can draw is envelopes, so send your address either as a comment or if you prefer it to be more private, to destroycctv@yahoo.com

(24 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[31 Jul 2004|08:19pm]
potatoes with gravy, pinto beans with sugar and butter. glass of ice water cold sweat dripping down the cups surface. fan on my back because maybe summer sails the temps, oh the rose today. singing neutral milk hotel to myself, too broke to leave the house for two weeks, so people should feel free to come by. sent 3 zine/letter requests today, some of the last extra cash i have. biking more. the heat wilted my serissa and is attacking my white pine, alas! but ho here is the water and they come back to life in hours. last night my brother came home with tons of friends and i was sleeping in the living room, well, trying to fall asleep in the middle of the floor listening to the bugs outside and heard him coming so i hop hop to my feet and bolt for the bedroom lay down lights out "see im sleeping" i think and fake it. lazy lonely never-late nights.

calcutta, plain print available from matthew[lj:farmerpoverty, which is a split between us, lots of little writings. coming soon, calcutta, childhood sticks. beware! just drop him a comment and if possible a couple stamps. watch out, his block prints may floor you!

when i try to read i fall asleep, any ideas to prevent that? and to all my "friends[those listed as such on this contraption]" tell me a few things about yourself, ok? deal.

(2 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[08 Jul 2004|08:43am]
Duluoz of Tathagata

A lay-about in home made
pajama pants -- a sheet cut up rewsewn
in the style of those saintly monks
of faraway Thailand forest tradtion --
fog on the land still early here,
when eyes first shoot open at 530am
or somewhere in there.
now lapse to 3 hours later and the gray
still hasn't passed completely
and some tree tops still accept a fine mist covering.
their dark greens a misty silver shadow above the rest.
all like miniatures out this window
cluttered desks feel more full of life
the cars crashing on through what is thought of as peaceful;
birds chirp and cars rebuttle,
all is still in the world, evermoving.
deep scratch of fingernails in the beard
new noise to add to the cacaphonic silence of summer mornings
held down but the nights dew not yet passed.

(18 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[05 Jul 2004|06:23pm]
by the mercy and graciousness of matthew my small book of haiku, Discussing Summer in a Room will be done rather soon. Comment if you would like a copy, and if possible enclose some stamps to:

Joshua Hale
P.O. Box 1947
Dover, NH 03820

other pieces of work by ModernCommunes Press are just a message away, be sure to ask!

(4 assasins | shoot the mindset)

[28 Jun 2004|01:05am]
Michael Moore is a useless fat white commodity in a useless fat white run world. [There, I said it.(THere, I beat an old joke into the ground{the one about his blatant racist comments in his last work})]

(shoot the mindset)

[26 Jun 2004|08:01pm]
the clouds are thin the wind is light the sun is nearly overhead
past the flowers through the willows down along the stream
people don't see the joy in my heart
the think i'm wasting time or acting like a child
ch'eng hao

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