Sunday, March 3rd, 2002
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10:47 pm
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Westlife ~ When You're Looking Like That
She's a 5 foot 10 in catsuit
and bambi eyes,
Everybody who's staring wouldn't
believe that this girl was mine
I should have known I was wrong
When I left her for a life in pity but
they say you never miss
the water until it's gone (yeah)
Guess I failed to love you
And you're taking it out tonight
How am I supposed to leave you now
When you're looking like that
I can't believe what I just gave away
Now I can't take it back
I don't wanna get lost
I don't wanna live my life without you
Am I supposed to leave you now
When you're looking like that
She's all dressed up for glamour and
rock and roll
Wanna squeeze her real tight
Get out of this place
If only I could take control
But she's out of my reach forever
And just a week ago she lied
next to me
It's so ironic how I had to lose
Just to see
That I failed 2 love you
And you're taking it out tonight
(Chorus)
I don't wanna forget you
I don't even wanna try
How am I supposed to walk on by
When you're looking like that
How am I supposed to leave you
I can't believe what I just gave away
'Cause I can't take it back, I'm lost
I don't wanna live my life without you
Am I supposed to leave you now
When you're looking like that
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9:06 pm
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i want to post...but i am so far from understanding myself,
there is no way to share...
wow crazy...
i am gonna watch lord of the rings...think about things...
and then...who knows
current mood:  awake
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Friday, March 1st, 2002
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11:11 pm
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my violet color contacts make my eyes look grey...
it's pretty cool if you ask me...
i miss my blue eyes though :P
i feel bad...someone i know is upset
and there is nothing i can do to help her...
she's too far away to hug...
and my " :P " isn't working the way it normally does :(
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8:00 am
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Pink ~ Don't Let Me Get Me
Never win first place
I don't support the team
I can't take direction
And my socks are never clean
Teachers dated me
My parents hated me
I was always in a fight
cause I can't do nothin' right
Everyday I fight a war against the mirror
I can't take the person staring back at me
I'm a hazard to myself
Don't let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself,
so irritating
Don't want to be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
I wanna be somebody else
LA told me
you'll be a pop star
All you have to change
is everything you are
Tired of being compared
to damn Britney Spears
She's so pretty
That just ain't me
So doctor, doctor -- won't you please prescribe me something?
A day in the life of someone else
Cause I'm a hazard to myself
Don't let me get me (No)
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself,
so irritating
(Don't want) Don't want to be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
Yeahhhh
Don't let me get me (Don't let me)
I'm my own worst enemy (No)
Its bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
So doctor, doctor -- won't you please prescribe me something?
A day in the life of someone else
Don't let me get me
Ohhh, I'm a hazard to myself, yeah
Don't let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
Its bad when you annoy yourself
Yourselllffff
So irritating
(So irritating)
Don't wanna be my friend no more
Dont Dont
Wanna be somebody else
Don't let me get me (Don't let) (Don't let)
I'm my own worst enemy (Don't let me get me)
Its bad when you annoy yourself (Its bad so bad)
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more (How)
I wanna be somebody else
(Don't let me get me) (Don't let me get me)
I'm my own worst enemy
current mood:  chipper
current music: Pink - Don't Let Me Get Me
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12:27 am
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so yes...
it's been a few days or something like that, i am sorry :P
so what has happend in the life of D'arcy you ask???
well let me tell you :P
i went out with neil a few days back...sunday night...
things went well, or at least i thought they did...
but i am guessing they didn't, cause i haven't heard from him since he left my house...crazy crazy...
either that or he's trying to play it cool or something...who cares...i don't have time for that shit...
so yeah whatever.
i have been working all week...today was my first day off...
let me tell you how much working sick SUCKS
they won't ever let me go home...
and now that greg has quit, and that today was mike's last day **sob**
we are REALLY under staffed...
so yea...i get worked like a CRAZY madd women!
so yes...
my life is a huge mess right now
but it's all good :)
i spent my day updating my site...
and i got TOTALLY side tracked from it...
sort of like how i am writing in this journal...
i will start with one thing...and end up somewhere else...
hehehehe :P
just like now :)
so anyways...there is a site update on the way...julia is just faster then me...lol
good for her :P
hehehe
you know i love you hun!
um...yes what else?
hhmmm...so much to write...
i got a fish tank...
yeppers that i did!
it's a small tank but still!!!
it's a 5.5 gal tank
i am happy with it
i have 4 frogs...who i am still naming
and i had 6 fish...i am down to 3 already!
lol
i had the heater on too high and the water wasn't ready...oh well, it's cool
i am learning :)
things are crazy at work right now...cause everyone is watching me and darryl 24/7 when we work together, it's sort of funny...or at least i think it is :)
hhmmm where can i jump to now?
oh yes...
i tried to make plans with julia today...
for paddy's day...
yeah i failed...she just doesn't love me anymore :(
lol
it's been TOO long since i have seen her, i totally miss her
and she sends me the nicest things!!
seth and i spent all night working on my computer...
i am now running windows XP...still in serious need of more ram though...
shittie shit shit
cam is still not working...
i am up to a black image with purple lines running through it though...
lol
Friends totally made me cry tonight...
i love that stupid ass show
i was crying...yep whatelse i new though right?
but i loved it, that had to be my fav episode...that and the one where rachel and ross broke up and everyone was there...
*crying thinking about it*
and the new survivor...
i liked it, it was cool
though i hate that one chick sarah already
stupid bitch
she should have gotten voted off
whatelse whatelse whatelse??
i miss darryl...
we don't talk that much anymore...
that makes me sad....very sad
i haven't seen him in forever...
i miss you buddy
ok, i know i am missing a hundred things...
but i am now sleepy
so i am gonna go to bed...
cause i have to work in the morning...such fun i tell you!!
GGGRRRR
lol
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Thursday, February 28th, 2002
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11:44 pm
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Tuesday, February 26th, 2002
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9:33 pm
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Sunday, February 24th, 2002
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10:51 pm
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i am very bored...
bored out of my mind to tell you the truth
suppose to be going out with neil...sort of feeling like i am going to be stood up :(
i wouldn't blame him all that much if he did....
he told me to call him at 10, so i did, no answer on his phone...i left a message...
he's wasn't sure if he would be working till 10 or 11....so i am hoping that's why he hasn't called....though i am worried
**darcy looks around the room with a worried look of being alone**
mikey was kind enough to sit here on the computer with me tonight talking about what i should wear on this date....nothing special...there were no official plans on what we were going to do or something...so i thought jeans and a baby tee would be fitting...i would take a pic, but my cam is still FUCKED
i have had a very interesting weekend....
club 717 on friday night with stephen...scary chick sticking her chest in my face....scary!!
party last night at kristin's turned out to be rather interesting...someone is gonna take the fall for that whole thing...and for once it *might* not be me...wow...
kristin is great....she really is, i love her to pieces...
i am so glad we are friends...i would be totally lost without her right now.
thanks girlie.
i went to my sister's today to watch the game...
good shit!
it was a GREAT game.
yeah baby, GO CANADA GO!!!!
i was so very happy about that!
i dyed my hair black again today...
mother might kick my ass, i don't really care...
though i am getting tired of this whole black phase i am going though, oh well.
lol
time to go shopping again it seems...where's my julia when i need her? hehehe
i gotta work stupid crazy hours again this week....it's really not going to be fun...i just worked a 50 hour week...i lost a 3 hour shift, i wasn't complaining.
work week (41 hours)
sunday off
monday 9 - 5
tuesday 9 - 9
wednesday 9 - 6
thursday off
friday 9 - 6
saturday 9 - 6
i am gonna cry soon i think
really i am.
mike is quitting...i am not happy about this...not that i blame him...
i figure i will be the next to go...
i think i will go looking on thursday...my only day off, i know, but hey...i am tired of what i do.
alright i am tired of typing...though it wasted 15 mins of my time, and took my mind off of worrying...i have called him twice...i want to wait to see if he calls me, but i am sure i will give in and call at like 11:15 if he hasn't called :( god i suck.
current mood:  worried
current music: Mandy Moore - Only Hope
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Friday, February 22nd, 2002
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1:46 pm
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do you ever wonder at what point things goes wrong?
i mean, life itself is crazy.
we have this "master plan" all layed out for us before we are even born...
we chose our life, and what is to happen before we are born...
or so i have been told
with every life we live we become smarter...we gain knowledge
but why do we put ourselves through all this pain?
why do we fall in love with people, if we know in the long run that that's not the person...
like if we have this "plan" why can't we see that the person we are with is not the person we are suppose to be with?
and who's to say just because you break up...means that it's over??
there are two people who i have been in relationships with...two people who i know i was truely in love with...one being paul...who lives in ireland, the second being mike.
i don't know...
what's the point here?
in bringing this up...
i know all this in my head...
i know what i think and how i feel...
typing it all does what?
other then making me sad........
current mood:  disappointed
current music: Puddle of Mudd - Blurry
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Wednesday, February 20th, 2002
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11:29 pm
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i finally got what i have been waiting for, maybe that would explain my hyperness!
yep yep, this is true :)
so today has been interesting :)
i had to work in birds this morning cause greg phoned in sick (boo to that)
so i had to work there from 9-5
from 5-9 i was in kennels with mike.
christy and i went on break together, and kristin came in early and went on break with us too, she also brought me beanie babies!!! a whole ton of them too, and they are all SO cute. she's great. i love kristin.
working with mike was cool, at first it was really yuckie...but then things got better, we started to joke around...we even got in a mini water fight, it was great.
yeah i am too hyper to sit here and type
i will write in the morning
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10:15 pm
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She Hates Me ~ Puddle of Mudd
Met a girl
Thought she was grand
Fell in love
Found out first hand
Went well for a week or two
Then it all came unglued
(Bridge)
In a trap
Trap I can't grip
Never thought I'd be the one who'd slip
Then I started to realize
I was living one big lie
(Chorus)
She fuckin' hates me
Trust
She fuckin' hates me
La la la love
I tried too hard
And she tore my feelings like I had none
And ripped them away
She was queen for about an hour
After that, her shit got sour
She took all I ever had
No sign of guilt
No feeling of bad, no
(Bridge)
In a trap
Trap I can't grip
Never thought I'd be the one who'd slip
Then I started to realize
I was living one big lie
(Chorus)
She fuckin' hates me
Trust
She fuckin' hates me
La la la love
I tried too hard
And she tore my feelings like I had none
And ripped them away
That's my story, as you see
learn my lesson, and so did she..
Now it's over and im gald !
"Cuz" im a fool for all that shit,
She fuckin' hates me, Trust
She fuckin' hates me
La la la love
I tried too hard
And she tore my feelings like I had none
And ripped them away
La la la la la la la la la love, Trust
La la la la la la la la la love, Trust (repeat 2 times)
And she tore my feelings like I had none
she fuckin' hates me !
(Ha, she fukin' hates me, I never got any action anyway!)
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12:14 am
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Tuesday, February 19th, 2002
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11:58 pm
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OMG, kristin totally rocks.
i love her, i swear
she is a god
:)
thanks for making me laugh and smile girlie.
things aren't so bad after all
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11:12 pm
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10:33 pm
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"I HATE LAB REPORTS!!!! ESPECIALLY PHYSIOLOGY! WHY SO MUCH WORK.... I'M JUST ONE PERSON! NOT EVEN ICE CREAM COULD HELP ME NOW!"
~ this is an away message that my old best friend posted on her ICQ...it totally made me smile...i miss her
in other news...i sit here crying...over you...for no reason, there is no point in even crying anymore....this is so pointless
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7:46 am
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have you ever just been waiting for something?
waiting and waiting and waiting?
shit, this is driving me CRAZY!
i am going to sit at work today....all day thinking about it
hoping that i get it today...
i am going to drive myself CRAZY!!!
12 hours at work with this...
* think * think * think *
man!
it's what
7:42am...and i will have to wait till after 10pm
i think i am gonna cry.
and then if i don't get what i am waiting for today...
i am gonna have to do the whole 7am till 10pm wait again tomorrow...
stupid work shit having to work 2 12 hour shifts in a row!
because of work, i won't be able to see jeff before he goes away...
that's always great...
well it's not like we are getting along that well right now anyways....
but still, it would have been nice to see him...
but i won't get started....
i don't want to get all bitter and pissed off....
why you say?
cause i am happy about something right now...
super happy!!!!
therefor i am just going to sit here and think about the happy thing, and now about anything else...not even work.
that's how happy i am...not even work can bring me down!
current mood: chipper
current music: Mandy Moore - Cry
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Monday, February 18th, 2002
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11:21 pm
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if someone knows how to fix my webcam...i would love them forever!!
i am sleepy
i don't want to give up...
nope nope
hmmm...i wonder if i will talk to jeff anytime soon
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Sunday, February 17th, 2002
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10:24 pm
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i haven't really talked to jeff this weekend...
he went home...surprise.
yeah when he goes home he's in a different world...
one where i don't belong
i am fine with that...funny as it sounds.
whatever.
i've got my own life too...
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6:38 pm
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12:03 am
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rule #1
never try to take your contacts out in the dark...you will take out your whole eye!!
wow...i need to be able to change my eye color to the color my contacts make them...i am loving the whole blue eye thing!
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