I had a dream last night. I was the captain of a spaceship of some sort at the end of a battle that it appears we were losing. A starship full of bad guys was approaching a planet they meant to destroy, and we realized the only way we could stop them was by ramming the enemy starship, destroying us both.

After our ship was evacutated, only three of us were left on the bridge. We were only slowly approaching the enemy ship, so we had time to contemplate the manner of our coming deaths. Having decided that we weren't interested in dying painfully in the vacuum of space, we tried to find out who had a firearm so we could take our own lives just before the impact.

My first office had a handgun, so we went to her quarters. We found the gun, a .45 automatic, but she had no ammo. I realized I had some .45 shells in my quarters, so I was heading over there to get some shells when I woke up.

I had a dream this morning that I was watching a sitcom starring Jason Alexander, Dave Chapelle and Dennis Miller. Something wacky was going on, but I can't remember what.

Have I really not posted a dream here in over a year? Wow.

Had one last night. I was on some sort of a road trip and towards the end of the evening I stopped at a strip club. After spending some time there, I decided to turn in at an adjacent hotel. I got my room, but when I went into my room, somebody else was already there. This didn't phase me as we had separate beds, but there was a dead body in the room with us. I asked my roommate if he had killed her, and he said no. I believed him and went to sleep.

In the morning I asked him when somebody was going to come and pick up the body and he said he didn't know since he hadn't told anybody about it yet. I decided to go over to the front desk of the motel and report it. They asked me to hang out for a bit and talk to the police so I did. I was explaining everything to the police when my alarm went off.

I'm in a house that I remember from another dream I had a while back, but apparently never posted on here. The house is a two story, but it's laid out so that it is very difficult to get from the upper portion to the lower portion. There is a staircase going to the upstairs from the outside of the house, so as a result, I spend most of my time upstairs and use the downstairs mostly for storage.

I'm downstairs for some reason cleaning, and I notice that I have a nest of spiders living in the house right in front of the front door. I guess there were about ten of them, all very furry and ranging in size from two inches in diameter to a couple large ones fully a foot across with legs about an inch thick.

I look around for something I can use to kill them, but all I can find is a can of something. I coax a couple of the smaller ones out and squash them with the can, but then they all come for me. This starts up a nice long period of the always pleasant trying to scream but not being able to. I'm frozen at this point, but the spiders aren't really biting, just crawling across my bare feet.

The big ones are very furry, and almost feel like dogs when they brush up against me. I wake up eventually.

Went to sleep at around 9:30 listening to TV news. I don't know when I had this dream, but I remembered it vaguely when I woke up at around 5:30.

Apparently I'm some sort of weblog reporting collective reporting from Baghdad. Either we've assassinated Saddam Hussein ourselves, or performed some sort of coup in Iraq. I get the feeling that we're in charge of the country, but that the outside world doesn't know it yet. And we have Saddam's body, freeze dried and vacuum sealed. With all the water removed from his body, it's easy for one person to carry him around.

I think we were on the run for a while, but that is very vague. I was carrying Saddam's body most of the time.

At some point, we found shelter and we decide that we need to let the world know that Saddam is dead. The leader of our group suggests that we call a press conference. I say, "Hey, why don't we just post the story to our weblogs? It'll be like real journalism happenning on a weblog! That'll be cool!" We all spend the next half-hour writing up the story to be posted to our weblogs, but spend so much time obsessively editing and re-writing that nobody had posted the story by the time I woke up.

Weird one... I got to sleep at around 2:00 AM, and I guess this dream started at around 8:00 AM or so.

I was in a hotel of some sort, going to visit a friend. The hotel rooms were around the edge of the building, and there was a large open-air courtyard in the center. I get over to my friend's hotel room, and across the hall from my friend's room I see Regis Philbin on the phone in his hotel room. It sounds like he's taking car rental reservations. I knock on my friend's room's door.

Steve Martin answers the door and asks me to come in. Apparently this is who I've come to see. He tells me that apparently the phone for Regis Philbin's room got crossed with Avis Rent-a-Car's phone, so he's been getting all their car reservation phone calls. Steve tells me that Regis is taking all the reservations and forwarding them to Avis, "because that's just the kind of nice guy he is."

Well, I tell Steve that I'll try to catch him after the show, but I'd better get off. (I have the vague feeling that it's Oscar night.) I think I went to see the Oscars, but at halftime the Grateful Dead were playing a concert in the courtyard of the hotel. The whole band is there, Jerry included. Jerry is using some sort of wireless deal on his guitar, so he starts wandering through the crowd while going on with the show. He enters the hotel, gets in an elevator and heads to the eighth floor.

He gets off the elevator and knocks on a random door. An elderly lady answers the door and he asks her if she has any requests for the band. She says that she's sorry, but she doesn't know any of their songs, so she can't really make a request. Jerry yells, "Boot Scootin' Boogie it is!" That's about all I remember.

I was asleep up in the back bedroom of my parent's house outside of Chicago. I knew I should have written this up right after I woke up, because I remember it being cooler right after I first woke up.

It started out with a dream of some sort, then in the dream I heard the ringing in my head that usually precedes a bout of sleep paralysis. I awoke from the dream and found myself laying in the bed in my parents' guest room, but I was able to at least roll around in bed. The ringing was very loud, but the room didn't seem exactly the same as it was. The walls on two sides of the room were gone, and I could see down to the stairs on the other side of the wall opposite the bed. There was a rail in the place of that wall, as if my parents had decided to knock out a couple of walls and turn that room into an open area upstairs. I rolled around for a while trying to get back to sleep, but the buzzing in my head made it difficult.

Usually at this point I panic, but since I was able to move I was somewhat relaxed, other than the uncomfortable buzzing and the fact that I wasn't able to get back to sleep. I tossed and turned for a while and finally I was able to get comfortable laying in bed facing to the right. Just as I was getting back to sleep, the buzzing increased a bit, and I woke up, the room back to normal, and I was facing to the left in bed.

How dumb is that. I had a dream about laying in bed unable to get to sleep.

This is my second Sopranos dream in just a short period of time. I think I need to find something else to occupy my time.

For some reason, I'm hanging out with Christopher Moltisanti and his fiancee Adriana. Chris has a great idea to create some new drug, kind of the "crack" of heroin. He's purchased a large quantity of heroin, and we're back at an apartment cooking the heroin. Christopher has to leave, but Adriana and I are performing the conversion. Basically, we're dissolving the heroin in water, creating a paste, and spreading the paste into thin sheets. Eventually the sheets dry into something about the consistency of very thin peanut brittle.

We break up the sheets and store them in a dresser drawer in an upstairs room in the apartment. Adriana and I have to go somewhere. We get in the car and she is driving. I don't think she's high, but I'm not entirely sure. We make it around the block when she swerves a bit into the left lane and we get in a low speed head-on collision with another car. She gets out of the car and begins talking with the person she got in the accident with. I freak out, sure that this is going to bring police to the apartment, so I start walking across a field back towards the building.

I'm met halfway there by two apartment complex security guards. They ask me where I'm going. I panic and blurt out, "I do not give you permission to search the apartment!" They glance at each other and immediately one says on the radio, "Lock it down!" I bolt for the apartment. I guess they don't follow, because I make it back to the building. I let myself in, and Adriana is already there. I tell her we need to flush the drugs because police are on the way.

We run upstairs and grab the sheets. She starts breaking them up and flushing them, but the sheets don't break into small enough pieces, and they're not dissolving very fast. I get the bright idea to break off chunks and chew them up and spit them out, but it doesn't work very well. It turns pasty and I have trouble getting it back out of my mouth. There's a knock at the door, and I panic. It's either the police, in which case we're busted, or it's Christopher and he's going to be pissed that I'm flushing the drugs and that I panicked and drew the cops to the place. I frantically try to crush up more of the heroin, but that's about when my alarm clock goes off.

It wasn't really scary in a nightmare kind of way, more like the tension you'll feel while watching a good thriller.

I got to sleep about at the normal time for a Sunday night, maybe a bit later because I had been reading.

I hear a knock at the door and go downstairs to answer it. It's a fairly large man with a goatee. He says hi and explains that he's here to follow up on the visit he made last week when he was pitching a political candidate to me. I remember him coming around then, and remember that he was looking around in the house through the door at that time. I suddenly realize that it is very late, the election was earlier this week, and this man has no business being here. A very evil grin comes over the guy's face and he takes a step towards me. I try to scream but am unable to, then immediately bolt awake.

I couldn't have been out for longer than fifteen minutes... My radio was still on and it still wasn't in overnight programming yet. I decided to read a while longer before I went back to sleep...

The earliest I remember in this dream is being in a pool hall that is apparently in the basement of a hotel. The pool hall is filled with prostitutes. I'm broke and can't afford a room in the hotel or the prostitute, but manage to scrape up the $50 I need for the room, and haggle the woman I've chose down to $46. We then head up towards my room, but I lose her. I think that she's ditched me and stolen my money, but I realize that I still have it. That's about when my alarm clock goes off.

I'm not involved in this dream at all. It looks a lot like watching a TV show. It's The Sopranos. Apparently Tony has been killed. For some reason, Anthony Jr. takes over and is determined to find out who killed his dad.

In order to find out, AJ turns into a bit of a forensic accountant. At this point, I just hear the theme song being played. Shots of nervous looking other characters from the show alternate with shots rotating around the kitchen table where AJ is furiously crunching numbers at an adding machine. Finally, he looks up and leaves the room.

He has realized that his mom and Tony's wife Carmella has been embezzling from Tony and killed him when he found out. AJ has Paulie kill her.

I then dreamed several more episodes, but they're all much more fuzzy. I know one of them completely revolved around Paulie and I think it actually had a title saying "The Paulie Show".

In the first dream, I'm swimming in the ocean off the Kansas City coast. I decide to see how far out I can swim. I swim out quite some way, and try to swim back to the coast. I lose my orientation and am unable to find the coast. I notice the St. Louis arch behind me. Another swimmer is in the water near me. He says "Wow, you almost made it to St. Louis."

(what?)

I got home after a fairly late night out. I taken a nap before going out and drank a cup of coffee at a 24 hour diner before getting home, so I had a bit of trouble getting to sleep. Eventually I did.

I remember the dream starting as I'm some sort of coast, waiting to board a gondola which goes miles out over the ocean, presumably towards an island of some sort. We all board the gondola and it heads out. We're riding on the gondola when it starts to get somewhat windy, and the gondola is blown around on its wire. I'm looking out the front when I see a sign saying "No Anti-Sway Bar next fifteen stations". As we pass the sign, the gondola begins swaying so violently that I'm having a hard time standing up.

I immediately realize that there are no sides or bottom to the gondola, just a mesh of pipes that I'm precariously balanced on. I also notice that we are very high up above the water. I'm deathly afraid of heights, so I drop to the bars I'm standing on and hold on with my arms. I'm absolutely terrified, but I hang on and count the stations we pass. Finally we pass fifteen, and pull into a landing, where I assume we are supposed to transfer to a different gondola that will take us to our final destination.

As we get off our gondola, I notice that the transfer station is very crowded, and hear a female voice saying "Just open the god-damned safe!" I quickly figure out that the transfer station is being robbed. I'm not particularly scared, but we all get off the gondola and attempt to stay out of the way.

I end up heading to the stairs going down to the second gondola. The transfer station is very crowded, I assume because it has two gondolas full of traffic in it when the first group should be gone. I'm waiting on the stairs looking for a chance to attempt to grab the gun from one of the women, in the hope that the other people at the station will then jump the other and we can disarm the robbers. The two women robbing the station are upstairs and need to go down. The stairs are fairly small, but I smash myself into the corner to allow them to go by.

The first woman is very thin and walks by me with no problem and head downstairs. The second woman is covering me as the first passes, so I don't make any attempt at her gun. The second woman is more full-figured, and has trouble getting by me on her way down the stairs. Visibly annoyed, after she has passed me, she quickly turns towards me and fires, hitting me in the pelvic bone on the left side. The pain is intense, and I wake up almost immediately. After waking up, I can still feel the wound for a few seconds.

I somehow got a list of birth certificates listed by father. It turns out that my dad fathered a child in 1963, and I decided to track this child down. I managed to find them, and when I walked on to my half-brother's farm, I realized that I wasn't actually walking onto the farm, but was actually watching a documentary, and the list of birth certificates I had was actually a TV program listing.

The guy who I thought was my half brother was being interviewed about his dildo farm. He thought that sexual prosthetics should be more accepted, and he was doing his part to try to bring this about by using them for all kinds of things around the house. He had hanging planters made out of dildoes, his fence was made out of them, shelves, etc...

The program then changed to another program called "Light Circles". It started with a shot of a truck pulling out of a dock at just about sundown. Then time started to speed up, and you saw the first street light come on. As each street light came on, the shot zoomed back until you could see the entire city, then the region, and finally that cool shot of the earth at night. I think the TV show was British.

Just a quick note of explanation... I'm fairly certain that the dildo house thing got stuck in my head from last Saturday when my roommate managed to convince everybody (including me) that when he was an Industrial Engineering student he had an internship doing quality control at a dildo factory. He had me going, and I think the rest of the folks who were over still think he did...

Food: Taco Bell, eaten at around 8:00 PM
Alcohol Intake: None
Smoking: Probably 3/4 of a pack
Went to sleep: 9:30PM, with aid of a Tylenol Simply Sleep. Still didn't get to sleep until probably close to 11:00
Sleeping Position: On back.
Recent sleep patterns: All messed up for the last couple of days. Up late on Friday night, and all night Saturday. Napped off and on most of the day on Sunday.

Silly dream, and I only remember one fragment. I was standing in front of my kitchen sink, which was clogged. There is a knock on the door, and it is a plumber. He takes a look at the clogged sink and pulls out a bottle of Liquid Plumber. He then pours it down the drain. Nothing happens. "Don't worry, I've got an ace up my sleeve," he says. He then pulls out a bottle of Professional Strength Liquid Plumber and pours it down the drain. "You've got to be careful with this stuff on plastic pipes," he says. Nothing happens to the drain clog. He presents me with a bill for $900.

Food: Chinese, eaten early
Alcohol Intake: None
Smoking: Fairly heavy. Probably over a pack that day.
Went to sleep: 1:45AM, later than normal.
Sleeping position: On back.
Recent sleep patterns: Over the weekend I had been camping, and not sleeping much.

I had trouble getting to sleep, and was listening quietly to the BBC World Service. I kept starting to fall asleep, and then forcing myself to wake up a bit and listen to the radio. I'd guess I fell asleep at around 2:00AM. I think I had the beginnings of a dream, but it quickly transitioned to a bout of sleep paralysis. It had probably been a year and a half since my last occurence of SP, and I had since done some research into the condition. Hoping to transition to an OBE/lucid dream state, I tried to relax past the fear that the paralysis induced.

I did manage to calm down a bit when I became aware of a buzzing low in the back of my head. I became aware of a presence just outside my field of vision. It seemed to me that it was a ghost, definitely a malevolent presence. I imagined that it was a stereotypical Halloween ghost consisting of a white sheet, and I was able to see the very tips of the fluttering sheet on the edges of my field of vision, kind of above, behind and slightly to the right of me. I also noticed the ceiling fan above my bed swinging wildly back and forth, almost as if one of the blades had come off and it was badly unbalanced. It looked like it would come crashing down any second.

Fear started to rise, first about the impending crash of the ceiling fan, which would no doubt injure me badly. I was aware that I did not believe in ghosts, and had nothing to fear from the presence, but at the same time terrified of it. I started trying to move by rolling to my left, but felt like I could roll no further than up onto my left shoulder (though I remained immobile). I started trying to shout, and after the third attempted shout again was able to move.

I sat up, fully conscious, fully mobile. The ringing continued in the back of my head, and the ceiling fan still seemed to be moving more than it should be. I got up and got a drink of water, turned the radio up a bit and was able to get back to normal sleep in about thirty minutes.