Sunday, October 13th, 2002
|
|
2:02 am - Yeah yeah here I go AGAIN!!!.........
|
|
|
Tuesday, October 8th, 2002
|
|
1:59 pm - Just a song..........
|
****Listen To It Here****
Blue On Black
Kenny Wayne Shepherd
night
falls and i'am alone
skin
yeah chilled me to the bone
you
turned and you ran
oh yea
oh slipped
right from my hand
Blue on black
tears on a river
push on a shove
it don't mean much
Joker on jack
match on a fire
cold on ice
as a dead man's touch
Whisper on a scream
doesn't mean a thing
won't bring you back
blue on black
blind
oh now i see
truth
lies and in between
wrong
can't be undone
slipped
from the tip of your tongue
Blue on black
tears on a river
push on a shove
it don't mean much
Joker on jack
match on a fire
cold on ice
as a dead man's touch
Whisper on a scream
doesn't mean a thing
won't bring you back
blue on black
current mood:  depressed
|
|
I've had 1 Shattered Dream Because You Lie To Me
|
|
Sunday, October 6th, 2002
|
|
8:46 pm - A Thought
|
No one understands me.....
And no one ever will!!
I GIVE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
|
I've had 2 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
Saturday, October 5th, 2002
|
|
10:53 pm - DID IT!!
|
Did the Heart Walk today!
It was so nice.....just the feeling of doing it, there were over 4000 people there.the trail was really nice
It was aslo very sad in a way, I shouldn't have even been doing it for the reason I was, but I would rally love to go to other states and walk.........
I did reach my goal, which was nice
Here are a few pics of the shirts I made for everyone, we did 16 of them.......They don't look really clear but when I get my film back I'll have better pics..
Now if Geocities allows you to do this...grrr guess I'll find out......
|
|
I've had 7 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
Wednesday, October 2nd, 2002
|
|
1:13 am
|
As the day slips by
And the sun slowly fades
My mind drifts to events,
Images of much better days
I sit gazing at the stars above
With a slight breeze blowing
A quiet calm settles over my soul
For I finally realize
That I am not beaten, maybe broken in two
But if I keep reaching, grasping for more
I will find what I have spent
An entire life searching for............
©MGauden 10/02
|
|
I've had 4 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
Monday, September 30th, 2002
|
|
8:47 pm - Its that time AGAIN..........
|
|
|
|
5:52 pm - Thought these were cute
|
Life without danger is a waste of oxygen.
Life in a vacuum sucks
You'll get what's coming to you ... Unless mailed
Two wrongs are only the beginning.
"Suicide Hotline...please hold."
All work and no play, will make you a manager.
As I said before, I never repeat myself. (lol)
A diplomat thinks twice before saying nothing..
Computer Lie #1: You'll never use all that disk space.
Don't confuse me with facts, my mind's already made up.
Don't talk unless you can improve the silence.
I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I'm perfect.
Just what part of "NO" didn't you understand...?
hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY?
Sign on baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS.
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. (loved this)
Conserve energy... fart in a jar
Girl laid in tomb may soon become mummy..
I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either. (so true!!)
There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't. (LMAO)
There are 3 kinds of people in this world...those you want things to happen, those that make things happen, and those who just wonder what the hell happened!
|
|
I've had 2 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
|
5:06 pm - UNBELEIVABLE!!!!
|
I dont know if im pissed or hurt.........
I was sleeping pretty much most of the day today and I had like 50 messages on my machine when I woke up,
One was from my neighbor, shes 91 i think, anyway it said to call.........I was busy getting a shower and then getting ready to pick the kids up so I didnt call back, I get in for getting the kids and the phone rings.It was her.....
She says Mary.I called........I said I know I got the message, I was a little busy........She said welll are you screaning my calls so you don't have to talk to me?? ( im like OMG!) I said no.........
So she askes me to come outside, she always has cookies for the kids, I go out and she says whats wrong with you, I said nothing.......she said well you never get out anymore
( thank you for paying soooooooo much attention to what I do!)
I said I do, just mostly at night, during the day Im busy here.......and she said well you need to get a job or somethig
(ok im getting pissed)
I didnt even get into the fact that I work from here
And then she says........Look, I lost my son, I got over it, there isnt anything worse........NOW I WAS MAD!!
You can't compare that kind of pain, I dont care WHO you lose, your pain is just as stong untill you go through losing someone closer, I could never do that I dont think thats even something you compare.Pain is pain, if someone lost thier best friend and not a parent , they would be feeling the same way i am.......thats how it works.........
THEN...Grrrrrr Then she says, well he was ONLY your stepdad anyway right??
I said No he wasnt!! and I turned and walked in the house
That was sooooooo rude! Some people really need to think before they open thier mouths! but the thing is thats the way she feels......
On a better note........Im ordering pizza!! lol
current mood:  angry
|
|
I've had 2 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
Sunday, September 29th, 2002
|
|
11:46 pm - Why?
|
Never will I understand that the people that you are FINALLY able to put your trust in............share your soul with.......Are the ones that end up hurting you the most...
Is it a game of life........where your suposed to be able to feel?? If so, I have felt more in the past 6 months then I ever wanted/want to...Yet who do you talk to?? who REALLY cares? And do I even want to share?? I no longer feel I can trust, or loved, or even be loved for that matter.........
Or is it more a game that people play??.........Let's see how far they will let me in......what are they willing to tell me.Then turn and walk away leaving you so damn confused and breaking that emotion to trust all over again?? If so screw that.Games are for kids and I grew up along time ago
Someday you will understand.... when you feel pain.....REAL pain, not pain over losing your puppy or telling /being told it's over, but a pain that eats away at you and rips you apart inside......
Each and every day ......it's a struggle to get up out of bed each morning and face what life is going to toss my way, and no Im not feeling sorry for myself, If that were the case Id be here everyday bitching or letting the world know what is going on in my life, Its more consumed with sadness.......
current mood:  numb
|
|
I've had 5 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
Saturday, September 28th, 2002
|
|
2:01 am
|
Everything I touch melts
Dreams simply fade away
Feelings inside no longer matter
Sit and watch me fall to pieces
Not so strong that my heart won't shatter
People that I thought I knew
Are living in anothers shadow
Living a life, no longer thiers
Making pretend your thier dearest friend
False stories and bigger lies
Haunt me each and every night
Bringing terror to my dreams
Finding it hard to close my eyes
Plunge your blade in a little deeper
Make sure you twist it nice and tight
Watch my blood spill upon the floor
I can no longer hurt you, nothing left to fight for
I ask only one thing
As you walk out the door
Look back once......
I'm not there anymore
©MGauden 9/29
|
|
I've had 10 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
Thursday, September 26th, 2002
|
|
10:27 am - Sounds good 2 me
|
Horoscope:
When the day is spent, you'll look back on it as a most unusual one, dear Virgo. Wild ideas sprouted in your head like mushrooms on a fertile marsh. You may have imagined leaving immediately for a trip around the world, or drawn up preliminary plans for an innovative housekeeping invention, or visualized an entirely new career in the virtual-reality business. Don't dismiss these ideas as totally unrealistic. They are not...
|
|
I've had 7 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
Wednesday, September 25th, 2002
|
|
4:34 pm - All that I need
|
Never have I asked for much
Possessions never mattered
All that I want And all that I need..........
A strong shoulder to cry upon
A hand to help me along
A companion on those lonely nights
And a friend to share my dreams
I don't want broken promises
Nor false ideals
All that I want and all that I need.....
Is to feel safe in your arms as you hold me close
Pour your strength into me....
A hand to caress my face, fingers through my hair
A warm body lying close to mine
Feeling the heat within
Someone to share my laughter with
Help to dry a tear........
Whispered secrets in the dark
Jokes that are all our own
All that I want and all that I need
Have seemed to pass me by.........
©MGauden 9/25
current mood: gloomy
|
|
Lie To Me
|
|
|
10:20 am
|
There will be no cake or candels
No cards made from the kids
No special dinner out tonight
As your Birthday treat.........
Instead of joy and happiness
And seeing that smile that shines so bright
There are only tears of sorrow
That you are not with us to celebrate
Our angel had to take flight
But listen to the wind
And hear us softly sing
Sending all our wishes to you
Embrace them with your wings.........
Dedicated to Pappy on his 57th Birthday!!
current mood: sad
|
|
I've had 5 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
|
2:13 am
|
|
|
Tuesday, September 24th, 2002
|
|
3:36 pm - Quiz Time...........
|
|
|
|
10:46 am - FINALLY!!
|
Getting my dryer fixed today!
Well maybe, Im not sure whats wrong I think its the belt and heating element( NO i didnt go to school for this :P) but Hey i paid lots of attention Girl things were boring.......
So as long as it doent cost a fortune it will be fixed when the washer went they told me just go get a new one! UGH!
Shane will be excited his CCS magazine came today, he's been waiting forever for it.......Its a skateboarding mag.
Ok I can understand the shoes, he wants the shoes but does it REALLY make a difference what you wear while skatboarding??
Hummmmmmmmm I think I need all new clothes for when I drive, and more for when I cook, and oh more for when im cleaning........
I started walking last night and today Im gonna start working out again, I keep saying that, but this time I AM!!
Ok im off to...........hum do something, dont feel like doing the graphics that need done right now........
I have another question.......
Why do dogs hate it when you blow in thier face, but have to have thier entire head hanging out the car window when your driving??!!!!!!!
current mood:  relaxed
|
|
I've had 7 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
Monday, September 23rd, 2002
|
|
7:55 pm - **Yawn**
|
I really need a nap!
Today wasnt really a great day, I did something I so much regret.......
My dryer is still broken, and I cant deal with hanging all these damn clothes!! Shane must change 3 freakin times a day, but what am I suposed to say?? No shane you cant change, that sounds so petty!
Anyway I started crying , then I called my mom which I know I shouldnt have, but if Joe were here my dryer would have been fixed 2 months ago, and I said as much to her....... and yes thats true but I shouldnt have said it.It cant be changed..........Nothing can, things will never be the same.........
Sometimes I need to think before I pick up the phone......
|
|
I've had 6 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
|
1:55 pm - Hummmmmmmmm
|
Someone told me that the jeans I had on over there
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Just are not me!!
Hummmmmm..........*Thinks*
|
|
I've had 7 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
|
4:36 am - Over The Edge............
|
Your breath I feel upon my hot flesh
Your soft kisses sending chills along my body
Making me come alive, craving you more
Your hands wonder, tongue explores
My body dances under your touch
Arching back, moving to the rhythm you have set
Hands tight upon my hips
Pulling me deeper, flesh on flesh
Tongue sliding over my lips
Moist and hot, as I feel my body clench
White hot lights explode before my eyes
Still unsatisfied, begging for more......
Push me over the edge one more time
Body yearning, hear it's cries...........
©MGauden 9/23/02
|
|
I've had 11 Shattered Dreams Because You Lie To Me
|
|
|
2:09 am - Hum not so bad!!
|
|
|
