Wow, it really sucks to be Paris Hilton's boyfriend this week.

Even though Cy Waits was considered somewhat a hero for his brave gun-wielding confrontation with an intruder who tried to break into Paris' home, things have taken quite the turn for the nightclub promoter.

This past Wednesday, Waits was promoted to head of nightclub operations of Wynn and Encore hotels, but within hours of being arrested for driving under the influence of drugs and alcohol, he was promptly fired from his brand spankin' new high-profile gig.

A Vegas insider said that hotel owner "[Steve] Wynn has a zero-tolerance policy with their club execs when it comes to brushes with the law."

So rough! Sucks to be you, Cy!

PerezHilton.com has learned exclusively that Rihanna's 1st single off of her upcoming album is called Cheers.

The song is said to be way more dancey and upbeat than her last album.

In other words, we think we're gonna love it!

[Image via WENN.]

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Slow your roll, ladies. Let's be honest here. The RHONY ladies don't deserve the big $nooki bucks!!

Well, THEY think they do!

Despite what the rest of the world thinks, the old hags women of Real Housewives of New York City are delusional and believe they should be getting the same $30,000 per episode paycheck that Snooki gets on Jersey Shore.

Ridiculous, right??

Even though the entire cast has been asked to return for a fourth season, the ladies ain't having it until their $4,000 an episode gets a major upgrade.

According to a source, "they have little choice but to pimp themselves out with side gigs to bump up their earnings. It's a full-time job without the full-time pay."

When Jill Zarin was spotted whoring herself out filming for Animal Planet's It's Me or the Dog this past week, she responded to an onlooker asking if she was returning to Season 4 - "I'm not back!"

As for the other ladies, no word yet on whether or not they plan on returning. Except, of course, for nutjob Kelly Bensimon who said, "Let's be honest, being on a show that Bravo produces provides a lot of other opportunities. They gave me a huge career at 42."

That's because she knows no one else is willing to hire her crazy ass!

The bottom line is this: Their ratings may be okay, but if they're not the ratings powerhouse like Jersey Shore, then these wrinkled ol' nags don't deserve to get the same pay!

And the show's execs need to move on!

It seems Nigel Lythgoe is none too happy with the possibility of Steven Tyler and Jennifer Lopez sitting on the American Idol judges table - he's still trying to get Elton John!

Nigel said:

“I must say, I really do love Elton John. He’s a huge favorite of mine." His schedule is "always the problem. It depends on whether [he] wants to give back.”

WTF does that mean?!

Elton's UK publicist has said, “There’s more chance of me fucking you than Elton being on U.S. Idol.”

LOLz.

The man is a legend and Idol can't afford him. GTF over it and PICK PEREZ!!!!!!

[Image via WENN.]

We doubt this is true, but we can dream!

Reports have surfaced that Madonna would like Lady Gaga to be the opening act on her world tour next year!

"Madonna is absolutely obsessed with Gaga," claims a source. "She thinks she is the most cutting-edge star to come out of pop in ages and desperately wants to work with her. Basically Gaga can name her price."

If only…Truly AMAZEBALLS!!!!

Update: Madonna's publicist has denied this!

But it'd be a great idea!

[Image via Getty Images.]

Just a day after getting out of jail for her cocaine arrest, Paris Hilton wasted no time getting back to her important daily duties such as napping, watching TV, and Tweeting, of course!

And what was her first Tweet after getting sprung from the big house??

In bed watching Family Guy. Love this show.! So hilarious! Stewie is my favorite love his accent.

LOL! Oh, Paris!

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Poor thing!

Justin Bieber canceled his show at Syracuse's New York State Fair on Sunday due to an illness.

A statement on the Fair's website reads:

"Due to an illness and under doctor's orders, Justin Bieber has been forced to re-schedule his Sunday, Aug. 29 concert at the New York State Fair to Wednesday, Sept. 1, at 7 pm."

The pop star will perform on Wednesday instead.

"Been super sick lately but u guys are carrying me. thank u for the love," Bieber Tweeted on Saturday.

Get well, bb.

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[Image via WENN.]