This Puppy Is 12 Years Young

9:29 am EST November 22nd, 2011 | News | 3 Comments

12 years ago today, a miniature dachshund named C.K. was born in Southern California. A few weeks after that he came home with me and he’s never looked back. He’s a smidge slower, a lot grayer, but still has tons of love to give. Here’s to my dog, the best dog ever.

Elevating Ignorance Comes Back To Bite The GOP

11:44 am EST November 16th, 2011 | Conservative | 22 Comments

The conservative movement, particularly its modern American element, has celebrated ignorance. From Barry Goldwater’s support for using nuclear weapons in Vietnam to Sarah Palin describing “what newspapers and magazines did you regularly read?” as a “gotcha” question.

The pinnacle of conservative ignorance was, of course, the never-ending support of an obvious moron in the guise of George W. Bush for president. Watching the GOP campaign, they are now realizing they may have gone too far with putting stupid up on a pedestal:

“It is an ‘Animal House.’ It’s a food fight,” said Kenneth Duberstein, a chief of staff to President Ronald Reagan. “Honestly, the Republican debates have become a reality show. People have to be perceived as being capable of governing this country, of being the leader of the free world.”

Even before his “oops” moment in one of the debates last week, Gov. Rick Perry of Texas stumbled his way through an answer about Pakistan and nuclear weapons. Representative Michele Bachmann of Minnesota has offered a series of historical goofs. And after mistakenly saying China does not have nuclear weapons, Herman Cain on Monday painfully gave an answer to a question about Libya in which he all but acknowledged having little grasp of the military actions that took place there.

Too late, geniuses. You’ve ingrained ignorance in the modern GOP and the conservative movement. You deny verifiable science. You deny obvious facts. You attack those who use intelligence over their “gut.” And on and on and on.

This is the world you made, conservatives. Swim in Lake Ignorance.

Republicans Bankrupt On Foreign Policy

2:58 pm EST November 14th, 2011 | Foreign Policy | 85 Comments

Barack Obama has gotten U.S. foreign policy back on track after the disaster of the Bush years. He’s ended the war in Iraq, killed Bin Laden, helped remove middle-eastern strongmen, and on and on. He’s proving that via progressive leadership, America can be strong and respected in the world. The era of going blind into Baghdad has ended.

Republicans, who loved during the Bush years to run on the falsehood that they were strongest on national security, have mostly run away from the issue now. After the Bush failure, America really doesn’t have any interest in invading the wrong countries or pushing lies about nonexistent weapons in order to avenge someone’s sense of inadequacy about their father or whatever. We’ve kicked the cowboy syndrome.

It was no mistake that the GOP debate on foreign policy was scheduled during the TV dead zone of a Saturday night. What little the field did say consisted of the same discredited ideas from the last decade of the right: sullying America’s good name with torture, bellicosity as a substitute for smart foreign policy, an America that leads with its fist instead of its brain. The usual Republican garbage that gets Americans killed and makes us less safe.

Obama’s made mistakes by not being aggressive enough on domestic fiscal policy, but on foreign policy he’s continued the legacy of America being a respected leader — something we have seen from both parties before the fecal smearing of the Bush years.

It may not be — understandably — the top of mind issue this coming election, but it’s worth remembering and hammering away at the notion that the modern Republican/conservative movement has nothing to offer America on foreign policy.

Happy Veteran’s Day

11:00 am EST November 11th, 2011 | News | 12 Comments

They’re Always So Pathetic

9:36 pm EST November 7th, 2011 | Conservative | 83 Comments

It is sort of hilarious to watch the same people who quite literally caused a constitutional crisis over half-baked allegations against Bill Clinton now insist that not only is Herman Cain innocent of the charges against him, but in fact that the very concept of sexual harassment is suspect.

Even better, they get to play the race card they’ve bitched and moaned so much about in the most disingenuous way ever.

Your modern conservative movement, rotten to its very core and then some.

Really Screwed Up

1:07 am EST November 3rd, 2011 | News | 39 Comments

30 MAJOR CORPORATIONS PAID NO TAXES FROM 2008-2010

A new bombshell report reveals that 30 major US corporations effectively paid no taxes between 2008 and 2010 as they raked in giant profits.

Quadrennial: Chapter 1 (A NaNoWrimo Novel)

12:43 am EST November 2nd, 2011 | Humor | 2 Comments

Chapter 1

“It’s great to see you all here,” Mitch Ronlade lied. Mitch looked back and forth across the room, surveying the faces in front of him. He hated these crowds, and they weren’t wild about him either. Iowa, in December, with the snow up to his knees was not Mitch’s idea of a fun way to spend his time.

Even worse, these people would not be voting for him for President. The question wasn’t whether he would lose the Iowa caucuses or not, but by how much. Mitch was a Republican, just not their type of Republican.

His father had told him, when he was alive and Governor, that “these people might be Republican, but they had no business making any decisions within the party.” They were “mouth-breathers, troglodytes, and nincompoops” in the words of Geoff Ronlade, about as harsh language as Mitch had ever heard his teetotaling father ever use.

The Ronlades were old-money Rockefeller Republicans, wealthy elites groomed from birth to run the world. They never expected for the “mouth breathers” to ever have influence, let alone the outsized sway they held over the party.

Yet here was Geogg Ronlade’s eldest son, with his Ivy League business school degree explaining to a man in a faded Iowa Hawkeyes trucker hat just how many miles of fence he would erect to keep “them Mexicans” out of America. It was all Mitch could do to not roll his eyes.

Times like this, Mitch went to his happy place. Mentally he went back to his year as a missionary. He was nineteen and life was simpler. He had few cares in the world. He wasn’t forced to compromise himself. He said what he believed.

“I heard some of ‘em got Sharia,” the man said, breaking Mitch’s concentration.

“Excuse me?”

“Some of them illegals. They got the Sharia law. Like Al Qaeda.”

“Well I haven’t heard that, but we’ll build the darn fence.”

Mitch flashed his disingenous smile, displaying all of his perfectly sculpted teeth. He gripped the podium as a bit more of his integrity circled down the drain. He couldn’t wait for this farce to be over so he could get to New Hampshire and be around somewhat more reasonable people.

He visualized the Oval Office, as his therapist had recommended. This was all going to be worth it, he told himself as he looked for another moron in the audience to call on.

* * *

The basketball arced perfectly in the air, giving a satisfying “swish” as it sailed through the net. The President smiled. He still had it. He stretched for the ball as it bounced against the exquistely polished parquet floor of the executive basketball court. The climate controlled room was perfect sixty-eight degrees, just like The President liked it.

Just on the periphery of the court was Dennis Hammerroot, his chief political adviser. Hammerroot was perpetually rumpled, even with a suit straight from the dry cleaners. The President often joked that Hammerroot was the fashion yin to his yang, perpetually behind the times while The President created trends.

The President bounced the ball from hand to hand, never actually turning in Hammeroot’s direction as he spoke.

“Am I gonna have to talk about ethanol subsidies?”

“It could come up.”

“Christ. Iowa.”

“You have to go, boss. At the very least so we can get the base a little revved up for the general.”

“Yeah, I know.”

Swish. In went the ball again. The President thought to himself, “still got it.” He had long given up his thoughts of playing in the NBA, but was sure his skill was enough to get him on the starting five somewhere.

“Iowa. We had a good time there last time, didn’t we?”

“You bet boss.”

* * *

Tonight was Frank O’Shane’s night. He had dreamed about this, ever since Randy Ainge, the president of Max News Channel, had first approached him for a job. He’d had to pay his dues for a few years, acting as the conservative half of the duo O’Shane and Cong, having to sit there as Cong went on about some socialist thing or another as the years crept on. Sure, O’Shane got top billing and he bullied Cong around the office for offenses real and perceived, but he longed to have his own show at the top of the Max News primetime lineup. He’d even lobbied Maximillian, the billionaire New Zealander who owned the network, for the spot. Ainge had resented him going over his head, and had forced O’Shane to co-host with Cong for most of the first three years of The President’s term.

But now O’Shane was free. Cong was gone, a firing marked by a tart “we wish him well” memo from Max News’ infamously prickly PR shop. O’Shane had divested himself of Cong, and The O’Shane Cause would take the lead on the network’s campaign coverage every night.

O’Shane hated Mitch Rondale. Hated the blue bloods and what they stood for. O’Shane’s people were the working class, the people who found their God under attack by the east coast liberal establishment, who saw their government silent on the spread of Sharia law, and who wanted to open the borders to just anyone huddled together with unwashed relatives in order to rape and pillage the country.

But O’Shane was a good Republican, and the polls the party chairman had showed him during their last teleconference were clear: the only candidate with a snowball’s chance against The President was Rondale.

So for the first night of The O’Shane Cause, he’d talk to Rondale via satellite from Iowa.

O’Shane pulled open his office door and yelled out into the hallway, “Where the fuck is my apple pie? Where the fuck is it?”

As he settled back in at his computer, he heard the familiar sound of people scrambling out in the hallway. It gave him a power trip, something he rarely had at home. Moments later he heard a faint knocking on the door.

“Come in.”

In walked Frida, one of the new batch of Fall interns. She had on her custom made O’Shane Cause t-shirt, which she had proudly shown off to her friends at the Georgetown Universty College Republican’s most recent meeting.

“Apple pie, sir.”

He grunted in response as she put the plate of pie on his desk and walked out of the room.

He didn’t know for sure, but O’Shane was positive that the pies had been smaller when he had to share airtime with Cong.

Prime time was his, and The President was going to feel the pain. O’Shane couldn’t wait to hear back from the private investigator he’d sent to Hawaii.

TO BE CONTINUED

America’s Real Fifth Column

1:00 pm EST October 29th, 2011 | Economy | 137 Comments

NY Times columnist Joe Nocera has revealed pictures from last year’s Halloween party for the Steven J. Baum law firm, a law firm that has been a key ally of the big banks in foreclosing on homes and evicting people. They represent Citigroup, JPMorgan Chase, Bank of America and Wells Fargo. Nocera explains the costumes:

Let me describe a few of the photos. In one, two Baum employees are dressed like homeless people. One is holding a bottle of liquor. The other has a sign around her neck that reads: “3rd party squatter. I lost my home and I was never served.” My source said that “I was never served” is meant to mock “the typical excuse” of the homeowner trying to evade a foreclosure proceeding.

Here are some of the pictures:

When people attack the Occupy protesters or President Obama or Democrats or Liberals for “waging class warfare” that’s because we’ve only just now joined the war. We’ve been under attack, from the inside, for a long time. We’ve only begun now to fight back.

I Think You Know The Answer

2:54 pm EST October 27th, 2011 | Media | 24 Comments

Fox Hyped Steve Jobs’ Critique Of Obama, Will They Cover His Slam Of Fox News?

Numerous Fox News hosts have highlighted negative comments about President Obama from Walter Isaacson’s new biography of recently deceased Apple co-founder Steve Jobs. Despite his comments about Obama, the book also notes that Jobs offered to help create advertising for the president’s re-election campaign.

What Fox has failed to report or comment on so far are Steve Jobs’ thoughts about Fox News, which he described as “an incredibly destructive force in our society,”

Condi Rice Throws Bush Under The Bus

3:03 pm EST October 24th, 2011 | Foreign Policy | 9 Comments

In the hopes of cleaning up history’s view of her and I guess selling more books.

Former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice said that the Bush administration was dismissive toward her concerns over security in a post-war Iraq, according to excerpts from her autobiography that Rice tweeted about Sunday.

“When I finally arranged a briefing on the issue before the President in early February 2002, he started the meeting in a way that completely destroyed any chance of getting an answer,” Rice wrote in an excerpt that appears in Newsweek.

Rice was Bush’s national security adviser, then later Secretary of State. She (like Colin Powell) wasn’t a sidelined party in these affairs, she was an active conspirator in the formulation and execution of these policies.

There are no takebacks.

Topic: Iraq