Yes. The answer is EVERY ISSUE.
The idea that political discourse, particularly in an election year, was EVER civil is the most delusional nostalgia.
That is all.
Kids:
A few hours ago, I landed in Los Angeles, turned on my phone, and confirmed what you already know. Sony Pictures Television is replacing me as showrunner on Community, with two seasoned fellows that I’m sure are quite nice - actually, I have it on good authority they’re quite nice, because…
Outtake from the PAUL F TOMPKINS FULLY POSABLE FASHION-IN-ACTION DOLL photo shoot for Sears Wishbook 2012.
Well, this is pretty cute.
Mini Prince on a moped!
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DO YOU REALLY THINK I AM THE ONLY IMPECCABLE ONLINE SOURCE TALKING ABOUT DAVID REES AND PENCIL SHARPENING? Oh, sorry. I guess you never heard of THE NEW YORKER? I will see you TONIGHT. That is all. |
Here is THE REMINDER:
I will be introducing ARTISANAL PENCIL SHARPENER MR. DAVID REES this very night at Public Assembly at 7PM.
ALSO JOINING: Jonathan Coulton, the incomparable.
IF YOU ARE 70 years old and used to go to the Little Gray Book Lectures, you should know that Public Assembly is located in what USED to be GALAPAGOS, and even more previously was a MAYONNAISE FACTORY, and this is the first time Coulton and I (and Rees) will have been assembled under this roof in SEVEN YEARS, due to our oldness.
WHAT A REUNION AND FUN TIME IT SHALL BE, and I frankly ORDER all former Little Gray Book Lecture Series attendees to ATTEND.
And also everyone else should go as well.
TICKETS ARE HERE. They include an amazing, hilarious, and surprisingly surprising book on PENCIL SHARPENING by a man I accurately call A GENIUS, and I look forward to seeing you there.
That is all.
IMAGE COURTESY: Katie Sokoler and the Gothamist.
“The Chinese Giant Salamander”
There are no lyrics to this song.
If there were, the only lyrics you need to know are:
“The Chinese giant salamander/
Reaches up to 6 feet in length”
(!)
Michael Hearst, master of all strange instruments, brings you SONGS FOR UNUSUAL CREATURES
Courtesy the critical blog entitled “If Charlie Parker Was a Gunslinger, There’d Be a Whole Lot of Dead Copycats.”
That is all.
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So, ONLY pornography, then? TOPICAL HUMOR EVERYONE! I LITERALLY JUST GOT THIS EMAIL! |
HERE IS EVIDENCE from Judge John Hodgman Verdict No. 59.
“Gail brings this case against her sister Aimee. Gail believes she and her nephew Ray are similarly sensitive kindred spirits. As a loving aunt, she thinks she should be able to comfort Ray when he’s upset, even over rule-breaking, and help him handle his feelings. Her sister Aimee believes Gail is unnecessarily coddling Ray and encouraging him to become an overly emotional child. Who is right? Only Judge John Hodgman can decide!”
Listen, download, or subscribe to it HERE.
This was a really difficult one. In many ways this was another Rashomom: so much about parenting (and aunting) relies on delicate context that—surprisingly—is hard to capture on a 30 minute half-comedy podcast.
It’s also the only time when I knowingly overstepped my bounds. Offering instruction to a mom and aunt about how to raise a child is monstrously beyond my mandate. And yet, as I felt compelled to speak, the only thing I could think of to make it better was to say then—and now—this:
All opinions are my own, offered for you to use if useful, and discard as the trash that they are if not. At end of day they carry no more weight than the podcast ether that carries them.
In any case, I am very grateful to both Aimee and Gail for bringing this delicate dispute to the court of a stranger on the internet. They are both brave and of good humor!
AND LOOK AT THAT CUTE BABY!
That is all.
A new Judge John Hodgman Verdict—“Spare the Hodg, Spoil The Child”—in which I unforgivably tell a mother how to raise her own child.
That is all.
