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Thread: Andrea's Thread - Like this?

  1. #61
    Join Date
    Feb 2000
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    Washington State
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    21,428
    Quote Originally Posted by Melanie
    "that's what we're looking for" -


    I just wanted to see that picture again. HA!

    Day 15 should be a Northwest anthem. Small suggestion:

    my nose hairs curl with flair.

    Easier to say "curl with" than "curls with". But then, again, "nose hairs' isn't. Heh. Don't listen to me.

    The last line is a corker.

    Donner
    Moderator
    Let the poem do the talking. Then hide behind it.

    Get your copy of Try to Have Your Writing Make Sense - The Quintessential PFFA Anthology!

  2. #62
    Join Date
    Mar 2001
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    Geoff,
    Always twisted (it's that witch thing coming out) and am currently sick, but recovering. heh. I found it interesting that the two strains had the same first name, m'self.

    Gene,
    Thank you.

    Man, Donna. Maybe I should just start all my posts with that picture. It'll increase my view hits, if nothing else. heh.



    April 17th


    “Be careful,” she said, "Princess Diana tried to be queen
    and look what happened to her. Only the Queen
    can be the head of The Church of England.” “Oh mother,”
    I say, “I’m not the Princess and could care less
    for the Queen. I have no interest in The Church of England.
    What have you eaten today?”

    “I plucked berries from the baskets of the liars at the church.
    They were green and hard as a cranberry. They popped
    in my mouth when I bit down. I think I broke a tooth. I tried
    to collect dew from the magnolia, but had to hide
    from the police as they patrolled the road. They all want
    me to wear blue, you know. I refuse. It costs too much,
    and besides, it makes me look pale. I wanted to boil oats
    on my stove, but they take so much water. They
    turned it off again and I’ve already paid my bill –
    twice, no less. Never mind. Never mind. I’ve got the bucket
    you used to carry on the beach. Remember that? It’s pink
    and covered with fat yellow ducks. I need the exercise,
    so the walk to the station isn’t bad. I can get water for free.
    The electric company finally got their bookkeeping straight.
    That man came again, but I went out and asked him
    if he was trying to strike me dead like he did Father Fred.
    Did I tell you that? They’d said it was a heart attack,
    but I knew. That man, he scratches himself in public. I think
    it’s because he likes to play with himself in front of me.
    That man, he’d shot a bolt and no one will tell the truth.
    I knew because I know where the electric man goes
    on Tuesday afternoons. He got in his truck and drove away.
    I’ll go to the FBI another day and find an agent to tell
    that crook to track the payments I send him. I keep them all.
    They’re all signed. But even the bank makes mistakes
    these days. I can prove it. I can show you my cancelled
    checks from last March, or April, or May. But it’s November
    now and the bank’s lost my address and I haven’t moved.
    I spoke to the teller the other day and complained
    about their thoughtlessness. I’ll take my cash away,
    I said and I did, so that I could pay for the water again. But Jane
    wouldn’t take the cash, may God have mercy on her soul,
    because she knew I’d paid the same bill ten times. I told her that, too.
    I said, 'May God have mercy on your soul, Jane.' They still
    cut the water off. They probably didn’t listen to her because
    she’s my friend and gives me snicker doodles her daughter makes
    after school, just the way you used to do. Do you remember?
    But I won’t let the electric company do to me what they did
    to Father Fred and Princess Diana, so I ate my oats raw for breakfast.”

  3. #63
    Join Date
    Sep 2000
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    Rewriting seems to be more of your forte than spontaniety is. But from this forced
    "write a poem in a day" spontaniety you are writing stuff that has some really profound and insightful moments. So, I really look forward to your rewrites.

  4. #64
    Join Date
    Mar 2001
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    Why thank you, David. Some of these are gonna be a while in the stewpot, though and I do take a long time to stew.

    4/18/05 Oh well, time for me to go fall asleep on the couch.

    I think I'll liberate my inner Hun
    or Genghis Khan. I'll black my eyes and bare
    my breast. I'll glue curled hair upon
    my chest. I'll blush my cheeks the faintest rose
    and dye my locks so dark they glow.
    The final wrinkle I need to learn
    is how to stand and tinkle.
    Last edited by Andrea345; 04-19-2005 at 06:04 AM.

  5. #65
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    Florida
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    curled nose hairs, curled chest hairs, crabs and snot and farts! what a fun thread!

    I just reread your thread and had such a great time. I love how you alternate between serious and humorous, and you've produced some really great things.

    Very inspiring!
    Blythe

  6. #66
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    Andrea,

    Day 18 cracked me up--there's now coffee all over my keyboard. You really should warn people or something. liberate my inner Hun--and the end did me in. Thank you for such a great start to my morning.

    Annie

  7. #67
    Dunc is offline but say it is my humour
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    Andrea

    Metaphysical and acoustic analysis of #18 leads us to -

    I think I'll liberate my inner Hun
    or Genghis Khan.
    I'll black my eyes and bare
    my breast.
    I'll glue curled hair
    upon my chest.
    I'll blush my cheeks the faintest rose
    and dye my locks so dark they glow.
    The final wrinkle
    I need to learn is how to stand and tinkle.


    and also to the Ultimate Question - what'll happen with your inner Hun when it learns to stand and tinkle?

    Lots of fun. Thanks / Dunc

  8. #68
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    Mar 2000
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    Maryland, USA
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    Quote Originally Posted by Andrea345
    I think I'll liberate my inner Hun
    [Dick van Dyke]I'm in love, I'm in love
    With Attila the Hun
    Attila the Hun
    Attila the Hun
    Though he'll pillage a village
    And kill everyone
    Still I love that Attila the Hun![/DvD]


    Your thread is a joy forever--like John Wayne playing Genghis.

    Julie

  9. #69
    Andrea,

    I have travelled many moons through word-forests and shards of danger.

    My dogs are weary and in need of provision.

    I have brought fine pelts to trade for 4/18.


    sefton (offering ceremonial deer jerky)

  10. #70
    Robtm is offline Master of creative writhing
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    Hi Andrea

    Excuse me a minute I just have to say to sefton: "You should be on stage man".

    Thanks, I just had to say that, the guy is hilarious.

    Actually so are you in the hunny poem. The opening line is comic genius run amok. Dunc made an interesting observation. And after Paula's example in the London Marathon you shouldn't have a problem with the latter.

    I really really will read back over each of your poems in, let's see, 12 days time - humm, make that 14, I will need one day to get drunk and another to recover.

    Bye for now.

    Rob

  11. #71
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    Andrea that was great! Really enjoyed your inner Hun. Your thread is so good it glows.
    Poetry is ordinary language to the Nth power - Paul Engle

  12. #72
    Join Date
    Mar 2001
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    2,374
    Blythe,
    I'm glad you've enjoyed the thread. Kinda weird to be thinking that now there's all these pomes out there that we've written over a period of time, ain't it? I haven't really gone to review my work at all, so that was an observation I hadn't considered. Funny how it is that we can never get a real good look at what we do over time. I don't think there's a one here I would have posted without the deadline. Frankly, I can't wait until the month is over to spend more time perusing all the threads.

    Annie,
    Honestly, I felt bad about posting it, but what do I know. It felt soooo good to hear it made you snort coffee out of your nose. Thanks!

    oh Dunc,
    When my inner Hun learns to stand & tinkle. HA! I won't be letting you know about those results. Guaranteed. What can I say, I couldn't keep a beat that day if you paid me, so I just wrote. It was one of those "couldn't keep a beat if my life depended upon it" kind of days. Thanks so much for the suggestion.
    -a

    Julie,
    oooo! Dick - I love my Dick!
    oh where o where has my little Dick gone?
    oh where o where can he be?
    oh no. This is really bad and that's not the song you had in mind. <This is your brain. This is your brain on Dick Van Dyke.> My brain is now polluted with permutations. Thanks.

    sefton,
    Rob is right. You gotta go on stage. That was good. Glad you enjoyed.

    Rob,
    call it a two day drunk: One to drink & and one to read. Oh, no, make that three: one to drink, one to read & the third to post your comments. Ets aml n hoe u komuncate.

    Kevin,
    Am I radioactive? No, really, I'm glad you've enjoyed my thread. I can't say that I have. I've always felt like hurling before I post. It's nice to know that I don't have the same effect on my readers.

    -a


    4/19 The obligatory pome about writing a pome.

    There was a poem in my head before I went
    to bed, but now it's gone. It was lovely,
    I assure you. It had to do with gardening
    and death, or was it about love and chocolate pudding?
    I can't remember. There was a poem
    in my head as I laid it on the pillow.

  13. #73
    Melanie is offline brew me and drink me with lemon
    Join Date
    May 2000
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    1,988
    I'm watching you.

    Gotta love this -

    I'll liberate my inner Hun
    or Genghis Khan.


    and the rest of it, but especially this.

    I know today's piece like the back of my head.


    *just waiting for you to become a Roseanne Roseannadanna story*

  14. #74
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    BC, Canada
    Posts
    1,315
    Wow Andrea.

    Way to show me up. I wrote a pome, too, and it was so much worse than this! Ah well. I actually enjoyed it, because it described pomes very, very close to my pome today (mine was about cookies and pizza).

    Thanks for the read. It was fun.

    Little Skittle
    Just a beginner...

  15. #75
    amy73 is offline talks to inanimate objects
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    somewhere in the Midwest
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    Andrea,

    enjoyed "Inner Hun"....

    I also plan to post the obligatory poem about writing a poem, but not until my store of crappy ideas is depleted

    Cheers,
    Amy

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