Notation
The pregnant drummer,
dumbstruck, wondered: How? She used
the rhythm method!
>sorry<
and No.
| PFFA home | Everypoet home | Classic poems | Absurdities | Contribute or subscribe | Support Béla's ego the PFFA: Iceberg (a CD) | Cure your insomnia with CBT-I
|
||
WARNING! We're mean. We're nasty. We're merciless. We're cruel. We're vile. We're heartless. We'll slash your soul to ribbons. We're an evil clique conspiring to annihilate your self-esteem. Ready? New to the PFFA? Read the Hot & Sexy Posting Guidelines and burrow through the Blurbs of Wisdom |
Fun and felicitous PFFA patron
Notation
The pregnant drummer,
dumbstruck, wondered: How? She used
the rhythm method!
>sorry<
and No.
still green
Sorry, it's not an easy year somehow, so it's fun to see some more of your sun-licking contentment and witty observations slipping in at the last minute to cheer us up. Claim to Flame, indeed. Heh. And Notation is a good chuckle with fun sonics.
Fun and felicitous PFFA patron
Specs
He likes obedience,
high fences, old shames
he can make new again.
He hates leaving me
alone, seeing me open
my own doors, floor boards
squeaking beneath his feet.
I’m just a puzzle piece
that doesn’t fit the scene
but he keeps hammering
Last edited by Sorry; 04-28-2012 at 08:21 PM.
Fun and felicitous PFFA patron
No Trespassing
Do you come, as I do,
for no particular reason
other than to appreciate
beauty, see green leaves
reflecting on the sun struck
surface of the calm stream?
I see your tracks filling
like a cup and wonder if
you sit somewhere, still
watching me, wishing
I would leave you to
your solitary musings.
Is this not my wilderness
too? Are we not equally
at home in these woods?
If common ground exists be-
tween us other than here, pray
tell me, wild one, tell me, where?
Last edited by Sorry; 04-28-2012 at 08:49 PM.
Destroyer of Lawnmowers
Hi, Sorry,
Ok, you should be, but Notation made me laugh outloud. HA!
But seriously, I think It Doesn't Matter is rich with possibilities. It has that yearning, "I need to" feeling that makes a good love poem, plus some very nice attention to sonics. Give it a careful editing pass or two, being careful not to clean it up too much, and I think you'll have a memorable piece.
Specs is nice, too. You might think about replacing "puzzle piece" with some other woodworking reference for continuity, but I like it quite a lot.
Donner
Moderator
Let the poem do the talking. Then hide behind it.
Get your copy of Try to Have Your Writing Make Sense - The Quintessential PFFA Anthology!
Fun and felicitous PFFA patron
The last three lines are for my memory. I do not think there is a better way to say what you did.
Thank you,
Jo
Fun and felicitous PFFA patron
Sorry,
An odd but wonderful Napo for you drawing to a close... in style!
Much taken with this:
Is this not my wilderness
too? Are we not equally
at home in these woods?
As with the amazing portrait in Specs!
haPpY nApO SoRrY
Cheers,
Sorella (plenty of food and drink still in the bar, you know!)
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote