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Thread: Bossy pants made me do it

  1. 04-01-2014, 01:00 AM #1
    Andrea345
    Andrea345 is offline cranky person
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    Bossy pants made me do it

    Thanks to so many generous readers

    Heads up - so far all of my material is explicit, so if you're not into erotic poetry, or under the age of 47, don't bother reading here. Your eyes will pop out.
    Last edited by Andrea345; 01-26-2015 at 06:22 PM.
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  2. 04-01-2014, 01:22 AM #2
    GreaterMandalaofUselessness
    GreaterMandalaofUselessness is offline gurning in the widening gyre
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    Well maybe we can all gang up and make Melanie join in too? Have a fab Napo

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  3. 04-01-2014, 01:29 AM #3
    Andrea345
    Andrea345 is offline cranky person
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    She has. Donner's pulled her into this HELL we know and we're going to KEEP HER HERE WITH US!!!

    Donner is the Ultimate Don!
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  4. 04-01-2014, 05:47 AM #4
    JustMiko
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  5. 04-01-2014, 06:08 AM #5
    Donner
    Donner is offline Destroyer of Lawnmowers
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    I can haz power.
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    Let the poem do the talking. Then hide behind it.

    Get your copy of Try to Have Your Writing Make Sense - The Quintessential PFFA Anthology!
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  6. 04-01-2014, 12:08 PM #6
    new leaf
    new leaf is offline still green
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    Can't fight that!



    　
    Have a great NaPo, Andrea.
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  7. 04-01-2014, 01:34 PM #7
    cookala
    cookala is offline certified napo whacko
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    have a great napo!
    I like to paint images around empty spaces.
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    Cheesecloth Moon (art, poetry,photography, some ranting, etc
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  8. 04-01-2014, 02:47 PM #8
    merelynn
    merelynn is offline Fun and felicitous PFFA patron
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    Happy NaPoMo!
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  9. 04-01-2014, 03:04 PM #9
    Andrea345
    Andrea345 is offline cranky person
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    moved off
    Last edited by Andrea345; 01-26-2015 at 05:21 PM.
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  10. 04-01-2014, 03:16 PM #10
    Alexandrite
    Alexandrite is offline A Squarely, Squirrely Moderator
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    Whoa........just Whoa........this stopped me in my tracks
    in a VERY good way. Excellent!! (but then I knew it would be )
    ...our words... come from obsessions we must submit to....~~~~~Richard Hugo
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  11. 04-01-2014, 03:24 PM #11
    prooftheory
    prooftheory is offline fun and felicitous, really?
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    I'm not sure how I feel about the meter breaking at line 7. I'm also not sure that I wouldn't use a semi-colon in line 7 rather than a stop because otherwise it is just a dependent clause. The poem is very powerful. I like that you don't quite get to see how the speaker resolves it emotionally.
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  12. 04-02-2014, 03:15 PM #12
    Andrea345
    Andrea345 is offline cranky person
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    Thanks Alexandrite and prooftheory for dropping by and letting me know your thoughts.
    Last edited by Andrea345; 01-26-2015 at 05:25 PM.
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  13. 04-02-2014, 03:20 PM #13
    Jee Leong
    Jee Leong is offline Seven Studies
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    Good to be reading you again, Andrea! "Adam" is brutal in its action and language. Love the bit about rising from the mud. Nothing so sissy as dust.
    SNOW AT 5 PM: TRANSLATIONS OF AN INSIGNIFICANT JAPANESE POET
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  14. 04-02-2014, 03:32 PM #14
    cookala
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    phew..... 2 very powerful poems back to back. good stuffs. potent.
    I like to paint images around empty spaces.
    My Flickr Photos
    Cheesecloth Moon (art, poetry,photography, some ranting, etc
    egrobeck (my ArtFire shop)
    Cookalas Pretty Things (my shop blog)
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  15. 04-03-2014, 02:35 PM #15
    Andrea345
    Andrea345 is offline cranky person
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    Yeah, Jee, now that I'm old I believe in moisturizer. ha!
    cookala - glad they werked fer ya!
    Last edited by Andrea345; 01-26-2015 at 05:25 PM.
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