The Dirty Days of April

[kristalynn]

The last line of Grief is pretty great. All that leads up to it is very strong too!

[senia]

ANDREA not Julie. sheesh - What's to say about Grief? It resonates with its honesty and acceptance? of the hopelessness felt.

Best, Annie

[Andrea345]

Cold Pie

Was my blackbird born only for a king's
appetite? I loved him, but the dictates
of fashion and a single man's hunger
left me brown and my trebles unanswered.

I moved from hawthorn to holly, ignoring the calls
"To nest. To nest." having once been adored.
I'm sure the crust was tender, the sauce savory.
I'm sure the king dined well as he sucked my blackbird's bones.

**********************************

Annie, no problem. It's quite the compliment to be mistaken for Julie. Thanks for dropping by.

kristalynn - I'm glad that last line worked for you.

Tanks all!

[Scrow]

Hello,

I enjoyed 'April Fools' very much, with its multi-syllabic words that cleverly added to the sense of it, until the final line, which rounded up the meaning. Grief was visceral, pictorial. It reminded me of victorian illustrations of autopsies, until - again- the end, where there was movement and a sense of N's sorrow.

Cold Pie - I love this. The fairytale becomes 'real', and the movement between the M and F blackbird's feathers plus the ending is very interesting indeed.

Sarah

[Donner]

Yes, Andrea,

Oh, goodie - a thread where I won't get my knuckles rapped with a ruler for mizpeling something.

These lines -

My failure slips
to the floor, and I crash to my knees in impossible prayer.
Hope is no more, and will does not stop my next breath.

should not be allowed to fade away.

Donner

Please don't forget to smile a poem or two, either, or I'll remind you of wagons and Burien.

[Melanie]

booger pickin' chicken

**There goes that secret identity.

[Angela]

Andrea,

April Fools is a clever title. I like the thought of Spring as young woman with her grotesque displays. I want it to snow again! Ha!

Grief is really well done. The descriptions are right on. You really do feel like your insides are being cut out.

Cold Pie has me seeing a fat King Henry VIII ruling over his table. The last two lines make me cringe as Henry slurped the marrow. Good images here.

Great start to April!

Angela~

[Arlene]

Last to first, love the nursery rhyme picked apart and remade, the second, short and sad, even almost looks like it's being pushed onto its knees, but then the lines lengthen, drawing out the grief, and the first, Persephone in hell, I suppose, poor thing.

[Sorella]

Andrea,
Grief in imagery to make the reader feel the physical pain of it, then the heartbreaking description of the effort to hold it back. You make it seem simple as a poet, and unbearably hard for N. Thank you for that poem, it will stay with me.

Sorella

[Andrea345]

Love and Other Anxieties is the name I'm toying with for this year's NaPop theme.

This song is a moment, this joy but a breath,
and you standing there before
my eyes are their fulfillment. Your breath
becomes my breath as I take your mouth
with mine. I am no longer one body.

****************************

Melanie -
I feel like Gomer Pyle when I say, "Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!" good to see you, you booger pickin' chicken. Thanks for the prompt yesterday, I needed it. There'd better be more where that came from.

Donner -
You just had to pull out the big guns and remind me of I JUST finished finalizing and The World's Most Boring Pome. Okay... Okay... You win. Today's might not be finished, but at least there's joy.

Angela and Arlene - Thanks for reading through them. I'm glad your eyes weren't spewing fountains of blood. I appreciate y'all letting me know how each one worked for you.

Sorella - Thank you for reading and letting me know it struck you.

-a

[shadygrove]

Dirty April indeed! Enjoying all the viscera in here -- especially in that weird, savory love gravy at the end.

[5th column]

This -

a single man's hungerleft me brown and my trebles unanswered.

is very nice. I'll be honest, I was expecting a pornucopia from the thread title a la Andrea at her finest however the surprises here are a nice change up.

Trot on!

[Julie]

Andrea, howdy! I saw upthread you were mistaken for me. I'm flattered. Love April Fools in particular. Probably because I am one!

[Julie]

Andrea, howdy! I saw upthread you were mistaken for me. I'm flattered. Love April Fools in particular. Probably because I am one!

[GreaterMandalaofUselessness]

Hey Andrea,

April Fools Really enjoyed this one. The long lines speed it up to a rant. You make a great case for Spring as a grey, leaky, muddy and miserable season with it's "eternally weeping skies of slumberous grey". I'm so convinced that I've decided not to enjoy it this year. Plus I learned "edematous".

Grief You might consider losing "open wound" which is a little cliché and just go with "Your death cut through skin and fat", but the rest of rings hard and true. "will does not stop my next breath" and "spills pinkgrey" stood out for me here.

Cold Pie. I like the nursery rhyme reference (four and twenty blackbirds). I don't completely follow it, but I don't feel like I need to. I can appreciate the bitterness, the edge to the voice. If I had to guess I'd say it had to do with not marrying/settling down "To nest. To nest", having been adored and the single man, but I could easily be wrong. I particularly liked: "the dictates / of fashion and a single man's hunger / left me brown" and the trebles/troubles word-play.

Love and other anxieties. That's some kiss!

A great start to the month.

best,

-Matt