The Joke About the Suit

I first heard this joke several decades ago as a teenager, recounted by a business associate of my father's who was having dinner with us. It made a vivid impression.

A man who is flush with cash decides to buy himself his first tailored suit and takes himself to a bespoke tailor, where he is carefully measured and picks out a beautiful tweed. A date is set for him to reappear to claim his beautiful new possession, and he presents himself at the assigned date. When he puts the suit on and looks in the mirror, he protests that one arm is too short, one leg seems to be twisted backwards, and the torso is bent to one side. The tailor reassures him, saying "just hunch your shoulder, bend to one side, and drag your leg behind you...it will look like the suit fits perfectly!" The guy does as instructed, and the suit looks pretty good. He pays and leaves. Dragging himself down the street he hears a guy say to his friend "Look at that poor crippled guy." His friend replies, "But doesn't he have a great tailor!"

Fight the suit, is I all I can say.

Courtship

It's hard to be taken seriously when you're made of paper. The amazingly talented Katherine S. is the oblivious object of desire in this photo. Check out her illustrations here.