Dear California...

California Coastline at Laguna Beach by kancp26

As my husband and I prepare to leave Southern California in just 2 days, only 1 day past the 6 month mark of becoming residents here, so much is going through my mind. 

SoCal has always been a part of our lives.  We vacationed here for years and eventually bought a second home in Palm Springs, CA.  Then we moved here, knowing it would be a stop along the way to somewhere else- but not realizing the stop was only going to be short one.

So as we move on, I will bid California farewell with this:

Dear California,
You are beautiful.  It is true.  Your beauty is varied and seemingly endless. 
You are warm and bright.  Your skies are bluer than I could have ever imagined.  
There is just so much to do here.  I now understand why Mark Twain said he wondered how anyone in California could ever die because everyone is so healthy here.
Your attitude is laid back and your people are more excited to greet the weekend or a holiday than anyone else I have ever met.  I am still so surprised to be told  'Happy Weekend' starting on a Thursday!

However, my dear California, I have also learned some truths about you.  You are crowded beyond belief.  Your traffic and costs are out of this world.  Its not fun to try to get to do all the wonderful stuff you have to offer when it's nearly impossible to get to those activities.  It feels like there ought to be another form of currency here so normal people can do such exotic things as buy a house or retire.  And California, your limits on freedom are certainly not for me.  It seems that your people are fine and good with tiny loud places to live and paychecks spread ultra thin while more and more rules drop into their lives via the government.
Oh California, how I wish I could keep your warm sun and live at the beach one day.  How I know that this experience of 6 short months will forever change how I look at life.  I will remember and relish the feeling of knowing that I can make it in a new home.   I will appreciate the fact that there is no perfect place and that everyone must find what works for them.  California, you didn't work for us.  We will visit you and we won't wonder 'what if'.  We are moving on.

Trained

As hard as I try and no matter how nice I've made the cute little patio area at the townhouse we're staying in, with lots of plants and highly desirable 'dog type' attractions, I just can't convince my two little dogs to use that spot to do their business.  I have tried 'waiting them out', standing out on the patio with them for over an hour- treats in hand to give out as soon as the desired behavior is achieved.  Heck, I've even left them out there and closed the curtain on their sad little faces at the window. 

Nothing.

They would much rather get all leashed up to take a walk.  And that's a bit time consuming and frustrating, as it needs to be done several times a day.  And it's also a bit confusing, as these guys have had no trouble using whatever spot I have designated in many different places we have stayed in the past.

Maybe it has something to do with THIS, being 100 yards from our front door:

A small patio holds nothing in comparison to a walk around the lake.  I think I'm OK with the dogs having trained me to do this several times a day!

Still A Balancing Act

Do you have any friends that always seem to come out on top, no matter what? 
Are you that person that doesn't worry or fret about much of anything and it all just works out for you?

I am a person who doesn't envy much... at all, really.
But oh how I would love to be one of those carefree, footloose souls.

I am working on trusting the universe and knowing deeply that things will work out as they should for all of us.  I feel pretty confident that living whole-heartedly and trusting go hand in hand.  And if you've been reading for a while you know that is a big change for me.  For so many reasons, trusting doesn't come naturally for me and living as if there really isn't anyone or anything out to get you is pretty new to me too.

But sometimes I still get it wrong.  Cuz' living life in a genuine way doesn't guarantee anything.  But then again, living with fear doesn't either.  So I guess I'm learning that it's best to live as if life itself is not out to get you.  And then if something crummy happens in a moment of misjudging, I'll just be human after all.  And that's way better than a fearful emotional mess of a human, anyway.

This insight was brought on by a moment in which I thought I was silly to think the worst possible outcome and then very nearly experiencing just that.  I should have trusted my instinct and not brushed away my doubts as being just negativity creeping in.  $1072.00, an endoscope and the thought that I might have actually permanently harmed my sweet little guy will hopefully teach me to recognize the difference.
No animals were actually harmed beyond minor discomfort- thank goodness!