It's my birthday today.

Yes- I'm now 46 years old. And I don't care who knows it. Coyness does not become me.

No- I don't want any cake today. Thank you.

Yes- I just spend 10 minutes reading my Facebook birthday wishes and counting how many there are so far (25). This is possibly pathetic, but I'm not sure. While I feel that 25 is a perfectly respectable number, I have a suspicion that it's not cool to count- or at least to admit that you did so....

No- I'm not having a party. Back in the day, I used to always have a party with a good friend from jr high/high school. It was always very fun and crazy and no parties since have ever compared.

Yes- I have been invited out to dinner and will be going to a nearby restaurant that I've wanted to check out for ages. It looks so chic and charming- I hope it lives up to its reputation...

and finally:

No- I'm not going to trot out that tired old bit of nonsense "I'm not getting older, only getting better".
In fact, I am getting both older AND better.
So there.

Valentine turned 18 on the 6th of July. Not that it made me feel old, or anything....

OK- maybe a little.
But that's ok. That was more than outweighed by the joy of seeing her becoming an adult- so beautiful, capable, kindhearted, clever, talented and full of happiness....

The party we had for her was great. Tya had about 11 friends over and had a barbecue. Then they played Wii rock Band outside, followed by a "sitting around the campfire late in the evening" kind of thing, which was all really fun...


(And here's Al, looking cute.)

One of the reasons I had to come back to Nebraska this summer was a party.
It was actually a pretty big party, but we didn't end up getting a good group shot of everyone.
I just have this:

We needed to celebrate the birthday of my Grandad!

It was a great time and a wonderful opportunity to catch up with family that I haven't seen for ages.
Good times!

I didn't post yesterday because I had to shop for party supplies, teach a couple of English courses, clean house and then make this:

It's a kind of psychedelic fairy cat. You can see that, right?

At any rate, it's what the twins wanted and they were thrilled. Plus, their pals were gratifyingly impressed.

I had to bake it at a friend's house (Thanks, Esther!) yesterday, as my oven is still broken. (As it would cost about 150 euros to fix it, I know we had better just go buy a new one. But I can't seem to make myself spend the money...)

Anyway, the kids were busy this morning getting everything ready. Even Severin lent a hand, but quickly fled the scene when the nine 11 and 12 year old girls showed up and started with the squealing and chattering.

A good time, as they say, was had by all.

Birthday Girls!

Last Sunday, the twins turned 12 years old. As a friend recently pointed out, this is probably the last "kid" birthday for them. At 12, they still ask for Barbies and Playmobil as gifts.

At 13? Not so much.

Actually, Mallory asked for books. As is often the case, Alexa didn't have any idea of what to ask for. It's funny that Mal has such definite ideas about...everything, while Alexa is much more laid back and vague about things.

And it's been that way since they were born. When she was small, Mallory would grumble and howl to get things just how she liked them- while Alexa laid ( and then sat) around looking serene and generally ok with the world as it was.

So, the zen girl got a video game involving music (she likes music) and a tiny digital photo frame

Then we had our outing. The buffet at the Chinese restaurant was a big success. The food was good and the decor was satisyingly oriental, in that crazy-tacky Chinese restaurant way that is so entertaining.

Afterwards, we went to Geneva:
The Museum of Art and History is rather small, but has some great pieces. Severin enjoyed the swords and armour, while the girls preferred the paintings.

Here's Alexa in front of some gorgeous peonies by Renoir.

And here's Mallory's favorite- a painting depicting a happy family of farmers apparently enjoying a picnic with all of their livestock. That's what I call cruelty-free farming!

That evening, for about 20 minutes, Mallory was 12 years old and Alexa was still only 11. Mal enjoyed it while it lasted, but Al was very happy when the clock finally hit 8:50pm. She could finally say she was really a whole year older!

A list of stuff ( just because I like lists)

1. Project Runway- I adore Tim Gunn. (Not that I'd ever want to meet him, mind you. I dress so badly that it would probably give him physical pain to look at me.) In case you are some unfortunate creature living under a rock and don't know of him, he's the co-host of a fabulous and "fierce" reality show that pits young clothing designers against each other in various challenging situations, ex: must make an evening gown in just 8 hours, using only materials purchased at a corner grocery store.
Let me add that I usually HATE reality TV. The kind of thing where a bunch of people live in a camera-filled house together and gossip about each other is just...so tacky and dull. But shows where people show a real talent, such as singing or sewing? They're a win, IMHO.

2. The Birthday of the Twins- The Dynamic Duo turn 12 this Sunday, which is kind of scary for their mom. My babies are nearly teenagers? Gah!
But it's all good, right?
The girls have opted to celebrate with lunch at a chinese restaurant and a vist to the Museum of Art and History in Geneva. (I'm so lucky to have such cool kids!)
Then, when the school holiday is over, they'll hand out invitations and we'll have a little party with their friends here at home.

3. Pumpkin Soup with Cumin and Coriander: This is a family favorite that is appearing on the table fairly often these days:
Sauté one chopped onion and 2tsp of cumin in two tablespoons of olive oil. Steam or boil about four cups of chopped pumpkin until soft. (If you boil it, drain it well afterwards). Purée the cooked onion and pumpkin til smooth, slowly adding three to four cups of chicken or vegetable bouillion. Wash and chop up a small bunch of coriander leaves? garnish each bowl with coriander, a tsp of creme fraiche (or sour cream)and homemade croutons.
Easy, yet kind of fancy, and very tasty...

4. Skeptic's Guide to the Universe: This podcast is my new "escape to reality" these days. It's about an hour and a half of discussion and debunking : urban myths, conspiracy theories, pseudoscience and paranormal crud get taken on. I especially enjoy it when they go after anti-vaccine whackos and homeopathy.

5. Dingue, Dingue, Dingue- Here's some French pop for you. It's the song stuck in my head this week. Sadly, the only lyrics I know are three words to the chorus...and they're all the same word. The kids are possibly a bit tired of me singing the word "dingue" (crazy) over and over and over again...but it's a cute song! (Here's the lyrics in French and in English, if you're interested)

When my baby boy was born, he seemed pretty big. His sister had been a dainty 7.5lbs. He weighed over 9.

Now he's nearly six feet tall and, as of tomorrow, 14 years old.

In honor of the event, we are having a party. Right now, there are seven teenaged boys in the living room, eating pizza and playing Star Wars Monopoly. Soon, they will eat this cake:

It's a nearly exact copy of Sev's bass- as near as one can get using cake, fondant frosting and almond paste, anyway. I'm not sure I'll be able to cut it- I think I bonded with it emotionally during the five hours I spent struggling and cursing to create it.

.I'd never before made a large, shaped cake. And I'd never had to color fondant before. It's harder than you'd think, especially in black. I think my hands are permanently stained.

But it looks prettycool, doesn't it?

Some people claim that Marie Antoinette once said " Let them eat cake".
In fact, what she said was "Let them see cake" The doomed queen hoped that viewing attractively decorated confectionary treats would soothe the violently rebellious spirits of the thousands of unhappy peasants milling around the palace.
It didn't work.
But I'll show you my cakes anyway.

Throughout my stay in Ouagadougou, I honed my cake-making skills. It was often quite challenging, as few good materials were available locally. The powdered sugar, for example, was dry, lumpy stuff from Lebanon that had to be pounded through a sieve before I could use it. Butter was available only sporadically, so I had to stock up, despite limited fridge space and power outages that could spoil everything.

But I persevered.

This next cake is one of the first character cakes I attempted. I probably should have made Pikachu larger, but I was just grateful that he turned out recognisable. Nothing's worse than making a character cake and having it misidentified by your eating public.

A remark like "So... that's...Big Bird?" would have killed me. (Yes, I do invest emotionally in my cakes. Thank you for asking.)

(The colors on the above cake were actually ok, btw. It's just a bad photo.)

Now, here's Santa. He's a bit square, but cute enough...

Here's another character cake from a cartoon. The film "Spirit" was a favorite of Valentine's at the time, so I made this:
This next one is also my own design. By the time I made it, I'd already done quite a few horse cakes. So, when one of the twins asked for a horse, I talked her into a seahorse- which she loved.
(I I love the expression on his little face.)

This is probably the most difficult character cake that I ever made. SpongeBob may be a big yellow rectangle, but he's a complicated big yellow rectangle. I'm pretty proud of him, as these cakes can go very, very wrong.

That's it for today. The kids are on school holiday now and I'm very busy keeping them busy. we're planning a big Hallowen party, so there's plenty to do. I'll try to post some pictures tomorrow so that you can see what we've been up to...

Big news! Taciturn Tuesday is going all cake, all the time!

Ok...maybe not all the time- but at least for the next three Tuesdays, I'll be sharing my past Adventures in Cake Decorating with you.

One day in Burkina Faso, I was seized by a sudden urge to make fancy cakes. My first effort was a 3-D train for Severin's third birthday. Mercifully, there is no surviving picture of it.
With that failure under my belt, I was ready to move on (and up, so I hoped). I borrowed a cake pan from a crafty US expat neighbor and managed to make this for Alexa's birthday:

(I made Mallory a Teletubby cake that year. No good pic, sorry.)

Tya's best friend needed a cake soon after. I felt brave and drew this pony for her- no fancy pan or any instructions. Just me and the icing.
This next one is one from 2001. The kids at the party thought it was a bit alarming. It's definitely one of the scarier cakes ever made in Burkina, I'm thinking. It's not an original design, though- I got the idea out of a cake decorating magazine. It was baked in a teddy-bear cake pan. Looking back, I maybe just should have made a teddy bear...

When Valentine was deep into her Harry Potter phase, I made her this Hedwig cake. It's my own design and I think it turned out pretty spiffy.

After a while, I had enough experience that I felt ready to venture into more complicated projects. I made a character cake, without using a custom pan or accessories. I grabbed the video box, took a long look at Buzz Lightyear and started drawing in icing.

Next Tuesday, stop by to see SpongeBob, Pikachu and many more cartoon characters, entirely made out of sugar. Maybe that doesn't sound too exciting, but it's better than the alternative.

Remember, you can only choose one.

"Cake or death?"

I'm still feeling under the weather and not like writing much.
Luckily, I have plenty of pictures to share.

A couple of weeks ago, I walked home in the rain. It wasn't miserable at all. in fact, I thought it was rather nice and was inspired to take a few photos. Here's a shot that highlights some local characteristics. For example, there's a couple of billboards on the side of the barn -a common way to pick up a few euros. And under the billboards, you can see the wood stacked up for the winter. People are serious about their wood around here.

This is why our little corner of France is called "The Green Valley":

When I pass by this house, I always peek in and say "bonjour" to their "goat". It's really well-done, isn't it? I just might get inspired to make my own trompe l'oeil one of these days...

When I get to this curve in the road, I know I'm almost home. (The front edge of our house is just visible at the center of the photo)
So, as you can see, we really are out in the country. We have a few neighbors, but they're pretty scattered. But despite the sometimes sparse socialization, we keep busy.

I particularly enjoy cooking and am constantly experimenting with new recipes. Here's a raspberry chocolate tiramisu that I recently concocted with some berries from our garden.
Our garden is almost all over and done now. There are about seven cabbages left, a few beets and a single pumpkin that I'm fattening up for Halloween.

Our sole apple tree is also ready to harvest. They're just plain old red apples, but they taste amazing when you get them right off the tree. We're eating the prettiest ones out of hand and making applesauce out of all the rest

Finally- today I woke up and got to work on a special project- a birthday cake for my eldest daughter's best friend. As he's also the drummer in their rock band, I decided that he should have a drum kit cake. I'm pretty sure it's the only drum-themed cake in the Haute Savoie -possibly in all of France...

I was born on September 1st at 8:47am, a certain number of years ago.

I had a sturdy build (8lbs 8oz), a decent amount of hair and lips that looked like I'd been given a dose of pediatric Botox.

My birthdays after that were usually good, though less eventful, of course.

Here's a Kodak Moment from my third birthday-

(Could also be a cute poster for the NRA):

Today I've had a pretty nice birthday, too.

I got some lovely cards, an armful of lillies and this fabulous work of art by Tya:

(It was much too big to scan properly, but you get the idea.)

The Fourth of July/US Independance Day holiday was always kind of a big deal in Ouaga. We were always invited to the US Ambassador's house for a pot-luck picnic.


It doesn't seem to be the same here in France. The US Ambassador in Paris didn't invite me to his party, for some reason.

Despite being left out by the big-shots, we managed to make our own fun.

Severin, being the Man of Da House these days, was in charge of the grill:

A bit later, a few of Valentine's friends arrived for a slightly early birthday celebration. The big day is really on Monday, but Saturday seemed like a better day for a party.

I made her a cake, of course:

The guests are still here, playing a board game...It's 10pm and I'm not exactly sure how long this is going to last...

Eleven years and six months ago, almost to the day, I nearly passed out in the office of the local ob/gyn. It wasn't just expectant mother lightheadedness- I'd just found out that I was going to have twins.
The girls were born nearly six month later on February 28, 1998.

In honor of this big event, we are having a party. Nothing like the huge bashes we used to have back in Ouagadougou, but their friend from school will come and we'll have cake and pizza


The girls and I made the candy tree on the left. It turned out very cute.
The cake, of course, is my own handiwork.
I kind of amazed myself by freehand drawing the tiger with black icing.

The guest arrive in just half an hour. I'd better get out of my frosting-covered clothes!

Tonight my house is filled to the roofline with junior-high schoolers and I'm being deafened by the incessant giggling, the monkey-like howling, and the constant rustle and crunch of bagfulls of potato-chips being emptied and devoured.

There's only six of them, but it's a hoarde, believe me.

Today is Severin's belated 13th birthday party. He didn't have a celebration in December because all his friends were going away on holiday. So, we put it off until today.

They're all nice kids- don't get me wrong. The excitement of the Wii and the sugar from the soft-drinks just has everyone a little over-stimulated. (And yes, the boy to the left of Severin is in his class and is his age. )

As is so often the case, poor JP is missing out on all the fun. I drove him to the airport in Geneva this morning and he's gone off to Burkina.

He won't be back for a month. So, there's no help for me as I try to get dinner for nine on the table tonight.

So, we're in this borrowed house, sharing space with a hoard of giant mutant cockroaches and several crazed kamikaze gekkos. Each morning before the kids get up, I patrol for buggy bodies- some dead and some still wriggling. This AM brought only two - one in the kitchen sink and a pony-sized brute in the bathroom off the room here the kids are sleeping.
In view of all the roaches-whom I loath- I take a pretty friendly attitude towards the gekkos. But try explaining that to them. I ran into a little one in the bathroom at about 6am today and despite my reassurances of good intentions towards him/her and all his/her kind it completely panicked and ran straight up the wall. Sadly, he had apparently not been informed by older and wiser lizards that his super -sticky feet would NOT be enough to hold him to the ceiling.
Luckily I saw what was happening and dodged out of the way as gravity had its way with him.
It's a happy ending: gekkos are amazingly bouncy. He scrambled off with no apparent harm done.
And I hold no grudges, despite the fact that he nearly landed on my head.
May he live long and munch many more roaches!

Yesterday was Tya's 15th birthday. But Severin remarked that it must have been her 5th, as the cake looked like it was made by Dr. Seuss. In my defense, it's VERY hard working in an unfamiliar kitchen. So, if her cake was somewhat lopsided and sported a pretty alarming shade of pink, it was not entirely my fault.
Plus, didn't mom always say that it's the thought that counts?

Instead of blogging yesterday, I made the colourful, possibly blinding, cake at left. Why is it that many things intended for young children are very, very bright? They are not all sight-impaired, just small and incontinent.
Anyway, the confection features “Dora the Explorer”. For those of you that aren’t in touch with the trends in little kid entertainment over the last decade, Dora is a cartoon child that wanders around a cartoon forest promoting bilingual education. Her parents, if they exist, are extremely neglectful. She is alone all day long in the woods, with only a perverted money for company. Boots (the monkey in question) hangs around wearing ONLY a pair of boots. That’s it. Kind of creepy. They need to decide: either he’s a normal money and has no need of any clothes or he’s a completely anthropomorphic primate and should be given a pair of pants. Just boots is kind of kinky, IMHO.

Well, it’s not my call. I just make the cakes.

I recently sent off an email in which I wrote that someone needed another something “ like she needs a hole in the head”- which just goes to show us yet again the dangers of stooping to writing in clichés. The moment I hit “send”, I started thinking “Well, your mouth is a hole in your head, as are your ears and nostrils. Who decided that a ‘hole in the head’ is the benchmark for the ultimate in the unwanted? That doesn’t actually make sense."Thinking about it further, I determined that the expression must really be: “like another hole in the head”, which makes way more sense. Maybe I have mis-heard the expression all these years. I figured that must be it. But a quick glance at Answers.com yielded the following:

Have neither a need nor a desire for something, as in I needed that extra work like I need a hole in the head. This expression has such ancestors as "As much need of it as he has of the pip [a disease] or of a cough," from John Ray's English Proverbs (1678), and "As much need of it as a toad of a side pocket," from Francis Grose's Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue (1785). [Slang; c. 1940]

So, that's it. It's an expression that is commonly used in English, yet makes no sense. I contemplated switching over to saying "like a toad has need of a side pocket". It's very colourful, but seems to be assuming a lot. Maybe toads would actually enjoy having pockets. They could carry around extra dead flies and such. Could be handy.

But today is a day to celebrate, not to obsess of obscure linguistic problems! It is Severin’s 12^th birthday! He’ll have a party on Saturday with a few friends. But today we’ll celebrate with just the family. I asked him this morning what he’d like for his birthday lunch.
“Rabbit!” he said, with a wicked grin.
Valentine got right into the spirit of the thing: “Mallory’s are just the right size now! Individual servings! Tasty and tender tiny bunnies! Yum!”
Just then, Mallory walked in the door with her favorite baby bunny in her hands. Snow White is one of the litter of six that was born about two weeks ago. Very adorable, with tiny, fuzzy white ears.
“Hey Mal!” I called out. “Why don’t you pick out a few of the bunnies that you aren’t so fond of and put them in a box? Just leave them in the kitchen. Severin wants rabbit for his birthday lunch.”
She just rolled her eyes at me and walked back out.
JP started expounding on the joys of rabbits as a food source rather than pets and lamenting the fact that it is never served in our home. He then waxed nostalgic over his mom’s homemade terrine de lapin (smooshed-up rabbit meat spread, for all you non-francophones)
Just so you know, there will be none of that in my home. Bunnies are for cuddles, not casseroles.

As for Sev, for lunch he’s getting fries and dead cow, in the form of grilled kebabs.

Here's a cake I made on the weekend for the birthday of little Zoe next door. This is just to show you that I keep busy while not blogging.
Also: I have had a few people write and say that the Papiers du Sahel website seems to be down. When you try the link, you get a sanitation project site. Now, I am all for sanitation, but I think it's pretty mean they grabbed our site name. I have written to my helper in Canada and asked "What's up with that?". I will doubtless soon have some info for you all.
More news: I finally managed to sell my demonic Land Cruiser. It is no longer mine and there is a song in my heart! I am now driving a Toyota Corolla station wagon that does not seem to break down on a near-daily basis. Which is nice.

I was hoping that my twins’ birthday party yesterday would provide lots of good material for today’s blog entry. It turned out to be a very typical kids’ party except for two things:

1. There were three sets of twins at the party. They made up 30% of the group. Come on and say it with me: “Oh! How cuuute”

2. As Mallory ripped open one of her gifts, I heard one of her little friends say proudly “See! It’s a vegetable keychain!” Mallory held up an orange object sewn out of plush fabric with a grinning mouth and demented-looking eyes printed on it. It wasn’t precisely carrot-shaped. It was considerably shorter and thicker, with a funny-shaped end at the top.
Mallory’s brow wrinkled as she dangled it. She leaned forward to see the writing embroidered across the bottom of the thing
“Funny Sex” she read in a loud clear voice. (She’s proud she can read in French and English.) “That is not a carrot” she announced authoritatively.
She was right. It wasn’t a vegetable, it was a condom: a fuzzy stuffed toy condom with a face and an attached keychain.
So, here sits Mr. Not-A-Carrot on my desk, right beside my computer. I am really regretting that my digital camera no longer works. A picture would be worth a million words on this one.