On Sunday afternoon, the Annemasse music conservatory gave their annual Christmas concert. I participated, just as I did the past two years- but this time it was much more fun because Valentine was there singing with me:

(This isn't a great pic, as it's kind of blurry- but it's the only one where you can get the full effect of our concert garb. I think we looked kind of elegant!)

The church was pretty full, but not as jam-packed as previous years, when it was standing room only.

Vivaldi's "Gloria" (RV 589- the famous one) was on the program.

It went really well and a good time was had by all.

This has been an odd summer...one that, for a variety of reasons, I haven't been too inclined to blog about.

But here's a nice topic for a post:

Along with three friends from the Music Conservatory, I performed last weekend at a medieval faire in a charming mountain village.

It was a long, hot day, but lots of fun....

List of Eight Things That Are Making Beth Happy Right Now

8. "Friday" by Rebecca Black.
How on earth could this be making me happy, when it is apparently inducing severe vomitting in everyone else on the face of the planet? It's one of those "so bad that it's good" situations.
Plus, the lyrics are easily changed to suit every day of the week and every possible situation. My kids are particularly good at this and many lulz ensue.
If you want to hear a version of this song that won't make your brain bleed, listen to this.
If you don't value your cerebral integrity, go ahead with the face-palmingly unforgettable original.
But what I really think you should all do is watch this parody (btw- DON'T get in the van with Uncle Dave. I'm just sayin....)

7.Super-short hair
Natalie Portman in "V for Vendetta", Demi Moore in "G I Jane", Persis Khambatta in "Star Trek" , and Beth in "Just Went to the Hair Salon Today and Said What the Heck, Cut it All Off."
Ok- maybe my hair isn't quite a marine-syle buzz-cut, but it's not far off by much.

Yes, I look kind of scary.

And yes, I love it!








6.Chanel Sculpting Eyebrow Pencil ( in brun cendre)
Just because I have no hair doesn't mean I don't want eyebrows, people!
And the best way to make my mangy, sandy-colored eyebrows look all awesome is to use this exactly-right, natural brown pencil that is the Holy Grail of the eyebrow-enhancing world.
And there IS such a world, I swear it upon my Mac Brow Set.

5. No.1 Ladies' Detective Agency Series by A. Mc Call Smith
If you don't know these books, start reading them NOW. They will not only entertain you, they'll make you wish to be a better person.
What happens after that is up to you, of course....

4. June 2011
Just thinking about next month makes my heart sing a bit, for a variety of reasons. One of these is the medieval faire at Andilly. We attended last year and the year before that. But this will be the first year that my kids and I will be WORKING there! Expect to hear MUCH more about this in a future post....

3. Ray William Johnson - Equals Three
One-stop shopping to meet all of your weekly YouTube viral video needs.
What? You say you HAVE NO weekly YouTube viral video needs?
Well the, you'd better watch this now and get over being so classy and highbrow and stuff....

2. Battlestar Galactica
I'm talking about the awesome 2003 miniseries, which was followed by a pretty darn fine bunch of shows from 2004 to 2009. I'm sort of rediscovering this, as when it first aired, I had no access to US tv shows because I was still living in Ouagadougou. (Just loading a short YouTube video there could take half a day. Seriously.)

What I'm NOT talking about is the original 1970's Battlestar Galactica, which, at the time, I loved with a mad passion. I have to admit that much of this mad passion was directed at actor Dirk Benedict, whom I ( and just about every other 12 year old girl I knew) had a crush on. Starbuck!
*Swoon*
Fond memories of my girlish fantasies (some not precisely G-rated, let's just say) featuring Starbuck tempted me to use the magic of YouTube to have a look at the old show.

And now I have proof that 12 year old girls in Nebraska in the late 1970's did not come with factory-installed Gaydar.

"Non-threatening" is the nicest thing you can say about the guy. The feathered hair, the high-pitched voice, the arch delivery of the oh-so-cheesy dialogue... what was I thinking?
My brother's guinea pig had more sex-appeal.

In the new version, the character of Starbuck is played actress Katee Sackoff, who is hundreds of times sexier and infinitely more masculine than Dirk Benedict. Even a straight woman, forced to choose between the two of them, would opt to date Katee.
I'm just sayin....

1. Bang Girl's Pages of Truth
My daughter Mallory doesn't read books, she inhales them.
So, it's no surprise that her first-ever blog is made up of her reviews of various novels she's reading. If you're interested in seeing it, contact me and I'll send you a link. As she's only 13, we're keeping her blog private for now. ( Creepers gonna creep, and all that)

It has recently come to my attention that my blogging skillz have seriously taken a downward turn over the last six months or so. Posts have been sporadic and major milestones missed.

This sad state of affairs must not continue! Especially considering the fact that a major area of neglect has been the very excellent rock band that Sev and Tya are part of: The Boxmen!

So, for your viewing and listening pleasure, here's the only existing video of their first-ever concert back in December of 2009! They'd only been playing together a few months, but were already pretty darn good!



Since then , they've only gotten better. Sadly, I don't have any other video footage to share. But I do have a few photos from their concert in December 2010.




Their next concert is in June and I PROMISE to get a decent video of it!

Friday afternoon, we celebrated JP's 60th birthday with several firemen and a few gendarmes....

Very festive, as you can see...

It turns out that when you set the woods behind your house on fire, the fire department and cops show up.
JP knows that now.
Just to be clear, he didn't start a forest fire on purpose, he was just trying to burn off some dry grass.
Which, it turns out, is illegal and dangerous.
Live and learn, as they say...

After the excitement died down, I took the twins and one of their little friends on a road trip to Lyon to see:

which was SO completely amazing and fun and cool!!

We had great seats and the girls loved the show- especially Alexa.

At the end, we went down in front of the stage to dance and sing along with the encore.
We finally got home at about 2am.
Good times!!

For some reason, I find this absolutely adorable...

If Nietzsche was right when he wrote "that which does not kill us makes us stronger", then why I am I not positively bulging with lady body-builder bulges?
That's what I'd like to know.

One recent event that I thought might be the death of me (or at least the source of amazing new triceps and quads) was the concert at the music conservatory last night.
Rehearsals have been frequent and crazy...some demanding six hours straight on my feet in VERY high heels.
Ouch!
And my voice teacher changed my solo song just two weeks before the show. I have to agree that the Purcell piece suited me better...but it still gave me very little time to get the bumps smoothed out!

And I was SO stressed at the last dress rehearsal...

But last night's show turned out SO well!!!
The only sad thing is that Tya took tons of pictures and even filmed my solo...but it seems that none of it is on the camera.
A mystery!
But there are a few photos that turned out, so you can at least get an idea of what the show looked like. And you can see my crazy costume! I 'm the one in the red 1950's dress and grey baroque wig!

You know how when you were about 10 years old and your grandma bought you a groovy pink and purple flower-covered diary with an adorable itty-bitty padlock and matching tiny key? And how at first you swore to yourself you'd write in it every single day? And how you did, at first?
But then how you slowly slacked off until you realized that eight months had passed and you hadn't written a word? And how it seemed hopeless to start up again because you'd missed so many vital events and catching the diary up would have been too gargantuan a task to contemplate?
Remember that?
No?
OK.
Never mind.

But I have to say that I find myself in a similar situation here. My beloved (by me, anyway!) blog has sat here unattended as I hosted hoardes (nice hoardes!!) of houseguests, played tour guide, and did some fairly blog-worthy stuff.
And now I have to get it up to date.
Where to begin?

On Friday (June 11th!), as the Auxillary Twins neared the end of their stay with us, three fabulous new guests had to be picked up at the train station. MLW was arriving from NYC, via Paris, with her 18 year old niece and two year old daughter in tow.

(I haven't asked if they want to be pictured on my blog. So all you get today is a back view of Possibly The World's Cutest Toddler.)

Then on Saturday, the parents of the Auxillary Twins arrived. They'd pushed up their trip by one day so as not to miss the concert that Valentine and Sev's band were to play in that night. I thought it was so lovely that they were interested and made the effort! And SO encouraging for Tya, who was quite, quite nervous by then.

Just as these new guest pulled up, JP was off to pick up Tya's godmother and her husband in Geneva. (They are real city-folk and neither one drives) So, the support crowd of fans for The Boxmen was growing by the minute.

I whipped up a little dinner for 15 people (ha!) and then we headed off to the concert, packed into two cars. We would have made the Shriner Clowns proud- we had seats for 12, but 13 people needed to go, so we just piled in and made the 10km drive up the valley, hoping not to see the police along the way.

The concert was primarily for the younger students of the "School of Rock" of our little mountain valley and was held in a small community hall. When we walked into the crowded, tiny building , we easily found the 13 seats at the front that the band had reserved for us at the very front.
As I sat down, Sev came over to me and informed me that he would be SINGING with another band that night.
"Just one song" he said with a feigned casual air. "They asked if anybody knew "Smells Like Teen Spirit", so I tried it with them and it worked. Gotta go now." And he stuck his iPod earphones back in and wandered off.

Talk about surprises!

First the younger groups played (5th and -6th graders). There were a few of my English students from last year. SO cute!
Then the older groups went on. Most of them were pretty decent, music-wise. The only problem was the singing.
Not good. At all.
One young woman's version of "Knocking on Heaven's Door" sounded more like what they must play just outside the gates of Hell.

A certain amount of smirking and groaning went on in the crowd, which I thought was dreadful. Yes, much of the singing was American Idol crazy reject bad, but these were just nervous kids. I smiled from my front-row seat and tried to send mental waves of encouragement and kindness.

And I hoped someone would do the same if my kids or their friends messed up...

The next band consisted of three adults. They played a couple of songs and then Sev came on stage with them, looking hugely tall and gawky in that way only 14 year old boys growing too fast can manage.
But as for stage presence? Chatting with the crowd? Getting a laugh? Sev was all over that. Then he launched into a parody of the famous Nirvana song!
It was so funny- it's really a shame that most of the people there didn't speak English!
"Now I'm mumbling, and I'm screaming and I don't know what I'm singing!"
I'm not saying that he sang it completely in tune. But then, does melody really count in a Kurt Cobain song?
I was just amazed that he was so at ease. And the crowd seemed to love it, despite the language thing. (Most of the groups were singing in English anyway, so everyone was pretty used to not getting the lyrics....)

After a couple more decent groups, The Boxmen came on. And that's when my normally somewhat shy Valentine showed us all that she was born to front a rock band.
I was completely astounded!They sounded GOOD! Really good! Like about 1000 times better than anyone else there. Their music was great, Tya's singing was impressive and they seemed to have FUN! You could really tell that they all like each other and enjoy being together.

"The crowd went wild", as they say. Everyone really seemed to appreciate them and the compliments afterwards were...vastly gratifying!

The best compliments came from their teacher... he was, obviously, SO, pleased with them. He pointed out to me that The Boxmen members are not the youngest kids in the association and are by far the least experienced. Max and Sev (guitar and bass) had never touched an instrument before September! And the drummer only had one year of experience.

On top of that, all of the other groups had been playing together for at least a year or more. But somehow The Boxmen blew them all out of the water. Their teacher is expecting great things next year!

Yes, I did film it.
No, I cannot show it to you.
The recording seems to be lost.
Can't find it on my camera!!!!!

But here's the thing- their great performance earned them a spot at the village music festival! And that's today! And for the event, I've borrowed a decent camera from a friend. So, maybe I'll be able to show you something soon...

It's lucky they're able to go perform today...On Tuesday, their drummer made a wild leap off a picnic table at school, trying to grab cherries off a tree (a common pastime for bored high school students at their lycée (high school), or so Valentine has informed me). He hit the ground, dislocating and breaking his right shoulder.
Ouch.
He's ok now- has to have his arm in a sling for a month and a half...and may need surgery. But at least he didn't break his neck....Could have been worse, as we like to say back in Nebraska.

The Boxmen have recruited their teacher to play the drums, just for this last gig.
And hopefully their drummer will be fully recovered by September...

The Book: The Ice Master: The Doomed 1913 Voyage of the Karluk- I’m not generally a big fan of non-fiction, but I make an exception for books about early polar exploration. I don’t know why , exactly. When my interest began, back in Burkina, I thought maybe it was because reading about people freezing to death made me feel less miserably hot. But that theory doesn’t seem to hold any (ice) water because I now live somewhere with very long, cold winters and I still love me some polar adventure. And this is a good one. Based on a mountain of diaries, newspaper accounts and some interviews, this account of a Canadian scientific voyage gone very, very wrong could have been very, very dry. But Jennifer Niven keeps the story engaging. It’s an amazing book!

The TV series: Dollhouse.
Joss Whedon-how do I love thee?
Let me count the ways…
( Buffy, Angel, Firefly, Serenity, Dr. Horrible and now, Dollhouse)
OK. Six.
I love thee six ways, baby.
(Apologies to E. Barrett Browning- but I figure she can take the damage)
Like everything Whedon has done, it's thought-provoking, creative, touching and funny. And, like the amazing and beloved Firefly, was cancelled by the networks after only a short run.

The Music Video: TikTok is THE song of the moment, I'm sorry to say. But, much as I'm not a fan, I’ve listened to it several times lately. I wanted to watch the cute video my cousin’s daughter made with a friend.
OK.
I’m not sure how appropriate it is. The cans of Mountain Dew labeled as Jack Daniels were kind of disturbing.
And the lyrics "Boys trying to touch my junk"? Well, maybe it refers to people rummaging through her box of old Barbies at a garage sale...
But it’s all in good fun. And she wants lots of people to watch it. And her mom is very sick right now with cancer.
So, cheer up Mikayla and watch her video. 'Favorite' it and star it up, even. She's a sweetie.


The Podcast: AV Talk - This is my go-to movie review place

The Home Improvement Project: That would be the new room being added to our house. And right now, as I write this, there are workers in it nailing on the interior wood paneling! Progress is being made!!

Most of the criticism I’ve heard about « Avatar » boils down to this: we’ve seen it all before.
Not the special effects- most people seem to agree that the film looks great, especially in 3D. What they are referring to is the story - how every scene seems to echo something from « Dances with Wolves« , « Pocahontas« , « The Last of the Mohicans » and a score of other films that deal with colonists vs. natives.

In short, the film is not « original ».

And original is good, right? I love to hear a new story just as well as the next person.
But here’s the thing: people all over the world (and throughout all of human history, probably) also love hearing the same stories over and over and over again. But not just any stories- special ones, with particular themes and character types that we never seem to grow tired of. These stories/myths/legends deal with archetypal events (birth, initiation, etc) and archetypal figures (hero, trickster, mother, etc).

You could, as I heard one recent reviewer on NPR do, call « Avatar » a montage of tired old tropes . (In fact, she used the word « trope » so many times in her five minute review that it made me suspect that she’d gotten a word-a-day calendar for Christmas). But if you know the work of , say, Carl Jung, Joseph Campbell or James Frazer, you might instead call the film an archetypal narrative.

I have a master’s degree in anthropology and that background heavily influences me when I see a film like « Star Wars » or « Avatar » . Calling myths and fairy tales « unoriginal » isn’t very interesting or useful to me. What’s really fascinating is finding the common cross-cultural themes. What are the stories/themes that get repeated for generations? What’s in them that’s true and holds lessons for every new generation?


« Avatar » features a hero that must go through initiation and rebirth, two of the most basic ancient archetypal events. He’s the outsider that transforms himself by passing through trials and becomes an insider.

And then there’s the Tree of Souls. You ever read a big old book called « The Bible »? No? Then please find one and just read the first few pages. Done? Good. Did you notice that there’s kind of an important tree in it? That’s one good clue that the « sacred tree » is an archetypal concept. And if even ONE more person says or writes « There’s a ‘tree of life’ in Pocahontas and a ‘tree of souls’ in « Avatar »! COPYCATS! GAH! » I may just have to whomp him/her on the head with a large, heavy sacred tree branch.
(For extra credit, look in the second half of the Bible. It features a character that sacrifices his earthly body to save an entire race…)

I’m not saying the film is explicitly Christian. What I’m saying is that both this film and the Bible tap into much older archetypes- ancient templates that help humans understand the world. And at some deep level, most of us understand this, because most of us seem willing to listen to/read/watch these primal narratives over and over again. « Original » and « new and improved » as desirable attributes are relatively modern inventions. When someone sits down to hear about how her culture says the world began, she doesn’t want to hear something different every time. That desire children have to hear the same story repeated every night is deeply ingrained and there's a reason for it.

Is « Avatar » unoriginal?
Well…yeah, it is. But that's not what we need to be asking.
How about let's ask: Did it tell a story you want to hear? Do you want to hear it again? Did you find it satisfying at some deep level? Did you find it emotionally involving?

I’d have to say « yes » to all those questions. Even though I «knew» the story, I found it very touching and the 161 minutes of running time seemed to fly by. Even better, I liked the discussion it provoked among my children. It provided a framework for talking about greed, ecology, colonialism and racism (sometimes I was uncomfortable with how it portrayed the « noble savages ». And also: Why does the future have no black people, Mr. Cameron ?)

I liked "Avatar" very much, just as I liked "Star Wars" and "LOTR", two other symbolically rich, archetype-laden films. And instead of ignorantly picking at it, I wish the critics would go read something first- something like Campbell's "The Hero With a Thousand Faces", a very fine old book on comparative mythology and archetypes. Then we'll talk.

Also: I think Michelle Rodriguez is a very fine actress. Why does she always have to play the tough-Latina-with-a-heart-of-gold-who-gets-killed-off-before-the -film-is-even-over ?
Just asking.

Plus, someone should tell Leona Lewis that « Titanic » called and it wants it’s theme-song back.

The weekend was both very busy and very quiet. Saturday was the crazy bit- I took the twins up for some skiing , had a couple of English lessons to teach and just generally kept going all day.
Then on Sunday, I was up early (5:30am!) and took JP to the Geneva airport. (He's now in Ouagadougou- he'll attend a conference and then get some fieldwork in. He'll be back in a month).

After that, the day quieted right down. My Big Plan was to go see 'Avatar'. We'd tried to go last week, but had arrived only to find it was completely sold out, even though it was playing on two big screens at the multiplex! I ended up watching "Arthur and the Revenge of Maltazard" with the twins and their friend we'd brought along. The movie was not All That, as you can guess just from the title. And I'm thinking of sending the following letter to the director:

Dear Luc Besson,

Contrary to what you may believe, that was not a 'cliffhanger'. It was just half a mediocre film.

As a result, I'd like a refund of 50% of my ticket.

On second thought, I'd like a full refund. Hearing "Poker Face" interpreted by the Minimoys Band gave me a bad, bad headache.

Sincerely,

Beth

I thought we'd have better luck this week, as I cleverly went online Sunday morning to buy our tickets for "Avatar" (in 3-D and in English! ) online. But all of the English language showings were sold out. Every one of them all day long. We ended up cleaning the house a bit, which was NOT a satisfactory substitute. I'm afraid it ended up being a rather dull day...

So, that was the weekend. Now it's Monday and I've been doing laundry and ...cleaning the house some more. It's the day I usually change all the sheets and clean the bathrooms. And today I did so while singing "Walk This Way" the whole time.

I don't even like that song.

In fact, I think I've cordially hated it since it was played 24/7 on the radio when it came out in 1976 . That's how it seemed to my 10 year old ears, anyway. I think they may have also occasionally played "Afternoon Delight", a song which actually makes me vomit a little. (Watch out when you click the link, btw- the song exerpt starts up right away and it's NOT for the fainthearted.)

Anyway, WTW is a song that, like it or hate it, everyone has heard. You, dear reader, can most likely hum the opening bars, as they make up the second most recognised guitar riff in history. (First place must go to "Smoke on the Water", of course)

But do you know the words?
I do.
All of them, I'm sorry to report.
This is due to the fact that, as a result of intense lobbying by the guitarists, my kids' rock band (which still doesn't have a name, btw) is covering the song. They are all really much more into alt rock /pop punk, but that famous riff, plus the long guitar solo at the end thoroughly won over Antoine (lead guitar) and Max (subordinate follower guitar). They carried the day and now Valentine is busy learning the rapid-fire lyrics. She's had to change them around a bit to make them girl-appropriate and less obscene and has done quite a bit of work. Which means I've heard the song over and over and over and over again as she plays it and struggles with the words.

Me? I'm really much more of a "Sound of Music" kind of person..... lyrics like "raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens" just seem to suit me much better than ones that proclaim that "you ain't seen nothin till you're down on a muffin". ..

This month, I’ve got a favorite season, pod cast, food, a website, song, tv show …

November Top 10 List

1. Fall- Nine years in the relatively invariable climate of West Africa gifted me with a mad love for seasons. These days, put me in a temperate zone and whatever season I’m in is my favorite, just because I know it will all change in just the course of a few months.
So, right now it’s autumn in the Haute Savoie and all I can say is: gorgeous.

2. A Way With Words- I want Martha and Grant to come visit me, tell me interesting stuff and be my bestest friends 4ever. Is that creepy? Is it inappropriate to feel so strongly about two public radio hosts that I’ve never met? Probably, but I’m powerless against the charms of their hour-long show that examines all the oddities and foibles of the English language. I laugh and learn something new every week. If you are curious about English slang, grammar, old sayings, word origins, regional dialects, family expressions, and just speaking and writing well, this is the go-to program…

3. Burkina-style Peanut Sauce - This is the national dish of Burkina Faso. Cooking it brings my four kids down to the kitchen saying « Smells like Ouagadougou !». It also has the advantage of impressing guests, as most people have never eaten it before- especially not an authentic version. You need: chicken broth, tomato paste, Maggi seasoning cube (but use it appropriately!!) , peanut oil, chicken (thighs work best), vegetables (for sure cabbage, also sweet potatoes and green beans. Eggplant, potatoes, and carrots are also good) You also need a bunch of peanut butter- preferably one made specifically for African dishes. Skippy or Jiff won’t work. Fresh-ground stuff from a health food store would do nicely.
All of this is assembled into a sauce and then usually served with tô. But rice works, too. If this sounds tasty, leave me a note in the comments section and I’ll give details on the recipe so you can make it at home…a bit of Burkina chez vous.

4. Cake Wrecks: Many thanks are owed to Joy and a few other readers that led me to this endlessly fascinating blog that documents the worst in professional cake decorating. Today, for example, it features a birthday cake that is « ornamented » with a pile of dead leaves on top of the icing. Not marzipan foliage, mind you, but actual dead, rotting leaves. Must be seen to be believed, really… Go check it out and consider it your « Cake Tuesday » offering from me.

5. I Gotta Feeling- I don’t usually get popular songs stuck in my head. My strange brain tends to add only oddities to my inner soundtrack. For example, when a pal burned me a cd with a song in on it about trapped miners committing cannibalism, I was humming it for days. And a more recent brain-worm tune for me has been the old hymn « In the Sweet By and By ». So, I’m not generally a Black Eyed Peas-ish kind of person. But when I took the kids to the cinema a few weeks back, I ended up wearing funny glasses, listening to talking guinea pigs wishing I were in the next room over watching Surrogates . But that was only appropriate for my older kids and, so I was keeping the twins company as they enjoyed G-Force. It turned out to be tolerably cute, as I am rather fond of guinea pigs. So, now the song I Gotta Feeling (prominently featured in the film) makes me think of secret agent rodents speeding down the highway in over-sized hamster balls and I smile… Plus, this is the only song that I know the words to that has the phrase "mazel tov" in it.

6. Glee- I’d seen it mentioned a few times on the web by bloggers I like, so I downloaded the first episode of the series. Then, I settled down with my three daughters to watch it. It’s kind of like High School Musical, right?
Wrong.
It’s clever, scorchingly mean, amazingly funny and SO not for 11 year olds. So, the twins don’t get to watch, but Tya and I are enjoying it. As someone who was in the school music scene back in high school, I find it particularly enjoyable. I think Tya likes it because the world of a US high school looks so exotic to her…there’s no cheerleaders or swing choirs in French lycées- not ever. Quelle idée!

7. Asphalt- Maybe it smells a bit dreadful, but it is still my favorite paving material for the month of November. As I write this, a team of eight men is outside my house, putting the finishing touches on our newly-paved driveway and parking area! It’s actually fascinating to watch (to me, anyway…but then, I don’t get out much) and I just spent an hour leaning out of Tya’s bedroom window, watching them work. JP was teasing me, saying that only old men like to stand around and watch construction projects. I begged to differ. Small boys like to, as well.
By Friday, it will all be cooled, hardened, and ready to drive on. Yippee!

8. The Nation- a brilliant magazine that keeps me in touch with US politics and helps me not be (too much of) an idiot.

9. The Annemasse Conservatory of Music- It’s a small school run by the city of Annemasse, just about a 20 minute drive from my house. In September, I joined the choral group there and am really enjoying it. It’s not just the singing itself and the nice new friends I‘ve made- it’s the whole ambiance of the place. It’s heavenly to be in a building full of nothing but musicians who are busy learning and improving. Very inspiring.

10. Top 10 Lists- They are so very appealing. Make one and you automatically feel organized and authoritative. The only problem is that, while 10 is a nice, round number, it can be hard to come up with that many good items….

My two eldest start rehearsals this Friday night. Yes, the local 'School of Rock' is finally in session! They are, as you may imagine, pretty excited.
It all seems quite well-organised. There is a large, well-equipped rehearsal space in the basement of a defunct post office and teachers that seem very competant and well-liked by the students. They even have the year's schedule worked out already and we've been informed that the first concert will be held in mid-December. The theme this year is... Pink Floyd.
Not that I have any kind of grudge against the music of Pink Floyd.
It's just so...old.
And even worse , the theme last year was....wait for it....The Beatles. It was a great choice- can't go wrong-something for everbody, etc... But why did they have to choose another group from the exact same time period for this year's show?
While I'll admit that the 60's and early 70's were very important (crucial, vital, etc) in the development of modern rock music, time did not stop in 1975.

The middle aged guys behind this local conspiracy would probably argue "It's classic! It's Rock Canon!" But I'm not sure that's the best criterion. For example, I love listening to Sarah McLachlan and Paula Cole. Heart-on-the-sleeve women songwriters like these owe lots to Joni Mitchell. Thanks very much, Joni. She's "canon" and "classic" and all that good stuff. But do I really want to listen to her? Not so much. In fact, I cannot stand listening to old Joni Mitchell stuff. "Both Sides Now" actually makes me throw up a little.

I feel the same way about Pink Floyd. Thanks for influencing groups like Genesis and Nine Inch Nails. Now let's move on, m'kay?

I don't really feel that I can burst in on their little male, past-worshipping enclave and give my opinion, though. Though the fact that I'm US-born probably gives me a certain amount of musical cred, it will only take me so far. Which is not very. So, I'm thinking that I'll have to at least wait until next year to give my input. Certainly if they come up with Cream or The Who, Something Will Have to Be Done. It's fine stuff all, but it's just more of the same.

Have these people never heard of U2? REM? The Police? And how about newer groups like Green Day and Muse? I have to think this would be more fun for the kids than ressurecting the same dusty old zombies year after year...

Sorry about the odd little mini-post earlier today. I had just sat down to the computer for the third time, thinking that this time I would finally get ten uninterrupted minutes in which to post a few pictures. Just as I hit the first key, I heard a knock at the door. I quickly typed a few phrases, hit 'publish' and went down to answer the door.

But now, finally, I really do think I'll manage at least a half an hour of blog-time. So, instead of 'Taciturn Tuesday', you're going to get "BurkinaMom Tells You Everything about Her Life and Illustrates It With Below-Average Quality Photos Tuesday."
Sound good?

I hope so.

Saturday afternoon, at 4pm, I started doing the hair and makeup for the big 'African Dream ' dance recital. It ended up taking me nearly three hours to get the three girls ready to go.

But I was glad they looked great. The show turned out to be a pretty big deal. It was staged at this venue:

Much larger and nicer than the school auditoriums or church basements of my childhood.

The show was about two hours long, but it seemed to pass quickly. When my girls weren't on stage, I enjoyed watching the other dancers, as well as the Malian music group that they'd brought in to play for the show.

It was also amusing to see most of our houshold goods from Africa spread out all across the stage. When I'd heard what the theme was, I'd offered to lend any of our African art they needed: masks, mud cloth, baskets, bronzes, carvings. I figured that someone should get some use out of it all We haven't put up much of our Burkinabe stuff in our home in France because JP (the arbiter of all things tasteful at our house) decided that if we put it all out, our house would look like a very small, crowded museum. He also cited his belief that it would be "showing off" the fact that we lived somewhere other than France. I'm ok with reason #1, but find #2 a bit odd. The only people who come into our home are friends and rumor has it that they already know that we lived for nine years in Ouaga.

Anyhow, for now, the masks and all their friends are living in the garage and only get taken out for special events. Poor things.

Sunday morning, I took the kids to Lake Leman for a swim and to try out our groovy new inflatable boat. We had a picnic and a good time was had by all.

Afterwards, fewer good times were had, as I realised that one of Al's legs was badly sunburned. Yes- one leg was alabaster white and the other was as red as .... a really horrific sunburn. It seems that when I reapplied the +50 spf sunscreen, I must have gotten distracted and put it on her right leg twice. I didn't put any at all on her left one.
I'm SO cross with myself. Poor Al.


Finally-Sunday night, we went to a birthday party. Sev and his pals set up their equipment and...well, you'd almost think, from the photo, that they actually played some music for us.


In reality...not so much.

Sev's garage band in front of an actual garage:

They look good, but it will be fabulous when they can actually play music.

The boys horsed about a good while, finally inspiring our hostess to go in the house, dig out her old flute from her high school days and honor us with a rendition of "Danny Boy". Srsly.

I really hate "Danny Boy" - even when it's played right.

I'm just saying.

Last weekend, I loaded up my car to maximum capacity (1 driver and six kids) and took them all to a concert put on by the local "School of Rock" that has already gotten a few mentions in this blog. It was the same groups we saw at a similar concert a few months back, but most of them were amazingly improved. It's heartening what a few more months of practice can do for a fledgling rock group!
The only exception was the oldsters' group- made up of six folks age 40-ish and above. At the last concert they'd graced us *ahem* with their cover version of 'In the Court of the Crimson King'. Then they performed it again at this concert. But this song (for those unfamiliar with it's length and tediousness) is a case where once is more than enough. The musicians were obviously having fun with it, but the audience? Not so much. They were a great group- don't get me wrong (especially if you are a member of said group and are reading this blog!) I just wish they'd expand the repertoire a bit and cut down on the pretentious, 10 minute long, 1960's progressive art rock songs. Cut that last down to zero, maybe even...

But most of the groups are made up of kids aged 10 and up, having fun. Some of the groups are really quite good. One of the best is a group headed up by the son of some good friends that live nearby. He's quite a good singer, with plenty of confidence and personality to back up his technical skills.

Last week was the first time I'd taken the twins along to see him perform. Alexa, in particular, was enchanted and hung out with the older kids right in front of the stage.

When we got home, she told me: "I'll never forget this night, ever! I'll remember it my whole life!"

In fact, all the kids had a great time, so when I learned there would be another concert in the same venue just a week later, I decided I'd take the kids. The poster advertising the event was kind of sleazy and normally would have put me off. But I knew lots of local families were going. And our friends' son would be playing again. All the other groups, though, would be ones we'd never seen.

So, Severin invited a couple of friends, as did the twins. Due to space problems, we had to kind of juggle and carpool with neighbors, but all nine of our little group got there in the end.

There were some great groups and it was good fun, but the alcohol was flowing pretty freely and there were lots of younger folk there that seemed to be getting 'well-lubricated' as the night wore on. So, even though the concert was to go on until the early hours of the morning, by 10:30 I had my group of kids gathered up and in the car for the drive home.

Once in the car, Tya popped in one of her cds, so that we could drive back with the windows open and the music turned up very, very loud. This, apparently, resulted in us being very, very cool, according to the sacred laws of teenagers worldwide.

The volume got louder and louder, finally cranked to the maximum for Muse's latest hit off the Twilight soundtrack. (NB: Normally, I'd have add a hyperlink there, but if you don't know what Twlight is by now, you're beyond the help of a mere link.)

Our whole house shakes with booming, groaning and thudding sounds. It could be an elephant up in one of the bedrooms, experiencing severe gastro-intestinal distress.

That would be a good guess.

But no- It's just my 13 year old son practicing on his guitar, which is plugged into an amplifier roughly the size of a small pony.

Yes, I am now the proud, though slightly deafened, mother of a teenaged, electric-bass playing child.

Looks really happy, doesn't he?

I'm not quite sure how it happened. One minute he's singing along to karaoke songs from Grease on the PlayStation 2 and the next thing I know, he's planning on being the Haute Savoie's answer to Ronnie Wood. (OK- so I'm old. If you know nothing about classic rock and haven't a clue who Wood is or what group he plays for, feel free to insert the name of some famous bass player from a current band. But you are sadly ignorant. I'm just saying. )

A few weeks ago, Sev told us his best friend had bought a guitar (second-hand, over the internet, from Germany. Modern times, you know) and they were forming a rock band. The fact that neither one of them had ever even touched a guitar didn't hold them back for a second. Actually, Sev's interest in doing this is far less puzzling than his friend's. Sev, at least, owns an iPod and enjoys listening to groups like Green Day, Simple Plan and Good Charlotte
But his pal Max had never seemed all that into music.

"What does he like, music-wise?" I asked Sev.

"I don't know...The Shrek soundtrack, I guess."

"You're going to have a garage band that covers tunes from animated films, then?" I wasn't being sarcastic -I'm all for a nice Beauty and the Beast medly. I just wanted to know.

Sev then explained that he hoped to be a good influence on his pal and widen his musical horizons beyond songs written for g-rated movies.

So it was that on Saturday morning, Sev took out some of his savings and bought himself a used bass and practice amp. He's been practising ever since, using printouts from the internet and hints gathered from watching YouTube videos.

At first, it was sounding pretty dreadful. Now, at least he can play some scales. The only problem is that the guitar seems to not be entirely in tune. I can hear that it's the A string that's the problem, but haven't a clue how to tune a guitar and am afraid to touch it. (My lack of coolness might make it explode, I suspect) And even more worryingly, the fact that his scales all sound a half-step off in the middle doesn't seem to bother Sev much. In contrast, the out of tune bits are like fingernails on chalkboard to me. But he happily plays on... and I'm not sure this bodes well for any future music he creates.

But he's having fun for now. And in the fall, he'll be able to join the local "School of Rock" and get some proper instruction. The school (really called "Les Passeurs d'Arts) is a great local institution that is very active in the region. There are several rock bands in it, all based in our small valley. They play in lots of concerts all year long and seem to have a great time. So, I'm looking forward to Severin getting involved and meeting new people. While my girls have taken horse riding lessons and dance lessons for many years, nothing seemed to interest Sev much before this. The only activity he really liked in Ouaga was fencing, but there's no fencing club nearby here in France for him to join.

"Being in a band will be great for him" I told JP. "It's much better than him sitting alone in his room playing PlaySation 2."

"It's much better than him taking cocaine, too." JP answered.

I think he was trying to be funny, but I think my response was even funnier, as I drily pointed out that people have been known to combine the two activities...

I mustered the energy to go to the grocery store last night, after I got done at the school. As I wandered the aisles, I reflected on the love-hate relationship with going to the grocery store in France.
No, make that hate-hate relationship. That means I really, really hate it, right?

When we first got to France, I did sort of love it, though. It was so clean and cool there. And so much choice. But it turned out to be too much choice (see this blog post) and so many other things about it drive me crazy these days.
First of all, the gocery carts are all out in the parking lot, chained together and the only way to get one is to slide a one euro piece into a slot. It's SO annoying, especially if, for example, you go for a big shopping expedition because all you have left at home to eat is a half a shrivelled eggplant and a box of corn starch and you find that the one euro coin that you ALWAYS leave in the car just for this purpose is gone, possibly taken by one of your kids to buy gum.

So, you rummage in your wallet and find that you actually have one euro worth of 1, 2 and 5 cent coins. Hoping to trade this huge handful of change in for a one euro coin, you go into the store and find your way to the "customer service" desk, where they do the huge service of telling you that they don't have access to any money, sorry. You'll have to ask one of the cashiers. Yeah. One of those harrassed looking people over there facing lines of customers 15 deep. Right.

If you can't get a cart, of course they do offer free of charge a shopping basket you can use. It is just about big enough to hold a four pack of yogurt and a baguette. It's just the ticket if you are shopping for a single person, hopefully an anorexic one, but is useless when shopping for six normal human beings.

And if that wasn't enough to hate, I heard no less than two songs by The Police and one by The Cure being played over the loudspeakers at the Super U. It was a bad moment for me. Nothing hurts like hearing something that you think is cool being played at the local supermarket."This is what passes as Shopping with Old People music now??!!" When did The Cure fall so low? Supermarket managers in rural France got the bulletin on this and not me?" I silently lamented.

And how about this: There you are, finally in the checkout lane after a long grueling shopping session and you are thirsty. If you are in France, you are flat out of luck. You'll just have to dehydrate, get kidney stones and die alone in terrible pain. You can't find water- not like in the USA where many shops have a nice drinking fountain right near the restrooms.
In France there are fountains, but they are the kind that are large, ornamental, outdoors and marked "non-potable".
And don't think of dragging your sadly desperate self into the restroom for a quick drink out of the sink there. That's marked "non-potable" as well.

Maybe this wouldn't be so bad if they sold cold drinks in the supermarket, but they don't. You know how US stores like to use that space near the cash register for impulse buys like candy and drinks? There's usually a grizzly bear sized cooler filled with small bottles of spring water, water with vitamins, water with extra oxygen and all sorts of other drinks, including my personal favorite: Diet Dr. Pepper, which is probably made up of 700 different kinds of cancer causing substances, but I just don't care.

Well, in France, forget that. No water, no anything.

So, there you are- all parched and annoyed and now it's time to unload your shopping cart. If you were in , say, Ouagadougou, the cashier would check out your items and they would pass down the conveyor belt and into the capable hands of two or three really nice young men who would quickly box everything up for you, carry it all to your car and load it for you. And you could give them a small tip and they would be really pleased because (can you believe this?) lots of people don't tip at all. Cheapskates. Then you drive home quickly and have a nice glass of water. (there's no water available in Ouaga supermarkets either)

In general, under the above system, everybody goes home happy.

In France, though, this is the point where the major stress is just beginning. You unload your cart as fast as you can and the groceries zoom past the cashier and are shoved down the conveyer belt. They pile up at the end, a veritable Mount Everest of groceries. This is when you are supposed to whisk out your handy, ecologically correct shopping bags Wait! Don't tell me you forget your re-usable canvas shopping bags? If so, too bad for you, because there are no free bags at the store.

Bags or no, the cashier keeps pushing stuff at you and you deal with it as fast as you can, but it's never fast enough. She calls out the total and you're not even half done packing everything, but you fumble around for your "carte fidelité" and your carte bleu so you can pay for it all.
You punch in your code and start bagging again as the line behind you grows and grows.In fact, it seems like the entire population of France is in that line, waiting for you to get your show on the road. Babies are wailing, people tap their feet impatiently and yes, that elderly priest is glaring at you.

So you throw all your stuff into bags, trying to keep from putting the bottles of orange juice on top of the tomatoes....You get the general idea by now, probably. Guess I woke up in a rant-y mood this morning.

What else is new around here?Well, it's been snowing like mad since last night, but I guess that's not really anything new. The kids are out right now, all four of them, rolling around in the piles of snow and falling flakes. I'm glad someone is enjoying it. I am just dreading having to dig the car out.
I'll probably manage to avoid going out today, but I'll have to tomorrow, as I have to go pick up Cristie the Romanian Handyman tomorrow at noon. He's coming back to help out with more work around the house. Lots of wallpapering, painting and small repairs remain to be done and Cristie's energy is needed to get us rolling again.
I'll be sure and take pictures of the work for all you HGTV fans out there

We've had a houseguest this weekend. He's a Burkinabé aquaintance of JP and he's in France for the first time. He might never come back, either. He seems very creeped out by the snow and cold. (Well, I guess we are too, but we'll have to learn to put up with it...)

Besides getting lights on the house, putting the Christmas tree up and doing the hostess thing, I also found time this weekend to go to a concert.
That's right.
I actually did something that kept me up past 10pm. What a concept!
It was the Christmas concert of the local "School of Rock". We knew lots of kids in the bands, so I took Valentine and Severin and we made an evening of it. Dinner was served as the various groups performed Beatles' songs, mostly. It was the theme of the evening.
But some bands did opt for other material. One group of teens did some ACDC. The singer had a good voice, but lacked presence and conviction. "Highway to Hell" sounded more like "Highway to a Tea Party in a Quiet Suburb".

But it was a very entertaining evening and a fun way to spend time with my older kids.

I had been planning to blog about school today, but I can't resist changing my plan, as I just found out some great news: my absolute favorite singer is giving a concert in Geneva in November. I don't know if I'll be able to go, but I have hopes...
I've been a Francis Cabrel fan ever since I heard the song "Petite Sirene" on the radio back in 1990. Not only are the songs he writes wonderful, he's also a genuinely nice guy who mostly avoids the spotlight , hasn't divorced his wife and writes really poetic songs.
But his most absolutely beautiful song is the one I've included here. He wrote it for his two daughters and it's very, very moving. In English, the title translates as "I Have Loved You, I Love You, I Will Love You." (It works out more elegantly in French). Anyway, here is my very rough translation of the words. I took a few liberties to get the real meaning across. (For those who speak French, it's easy to find the lyrics online.)

My child, you lie bare on the pebbles,

the wind breezing through your undone hair,

like springtime in my path or a diamond fallen out of the treasure box.

Only the Light itself could erase the secret marks of my fingertips on your wrists.

I have loved you, I still love you and I always will love you.

(chorus)And regardless of what you do, there is Love wherever you look -

in the smallest recesses of space and the briefest dreams where you linger.

Love - as if it rained down, bare onto the pebbles.

The heaven claims to know you,

And it's so lovely that it must surely be true.

Though it never comes near,

I've seen it captured within your net.

The world is full of regrets, full of unfulfilled promises,

but you are the only one for which I was created

I loved you, I still love you and always will.

(chorus)

We will take flight from the same place,

with same reflections in our eyes.

In this life and in the one after

you will remain my only project.

I will go to hang your portrait on all the ceilings of every palace,

and all the walls that I am able to find.

Beneath them all I will write that only the Light itself could...

And my fingertips on your wrists

I have loved you, I still love you and I will always love you
. .

So, I adore Cabrel and Natasha St Pier. But what's in the cd holder in my car? Um...Jordin Sparks, Blake Lewis, Jonas Brothers, and the like. Yes, my three daughters rule the cd player and I am helpless before them. Even poor Severin has been forced to learn to sing along with Hannah Montana songs...

Hollaback Girlz

"Thees my sheet! Thees my sheet!"
There I was, sitting at the back of the small room where the twins' dance class rehearses. They've been working hard all year, preparing for the big show that is coming up this weekend. I'd mostly stayed away from the practises, figuring that it could be a surprise.
And boy, what a surprise it was.
Before me were twelve cute little 10/11 year old girls, almost all of them singing along with the song as they practised for the dance recital.

"Thees my sheet!"they chirped enthusiastically.

Well, I thought to myself, Perhaps this is a song about a woman with a Martha Stewart-like love of fine bedding. She has a nice 400 thread count Egyptian cotton duvet cover and has morbid fears about it being stolen. Hence her repetitive insistence that it is her very own personal sheet. Yes! I'm sure that's it!

But then I listened to the lyrics on the tape. And, as you may have guessed, the song was not about decorative texiles for the home.

Of course, the little group of French-speaking beauties obviously had NO idea what they were saying. And Alexandra, the teacher, while fluent in Russian and French, is not so great with English- as we see by looking at her choice for the song about to be played in front of hundreds of parents and children at the French Cultural Center on Saturday night.

The song in question is something called "Hollaback Girl". I don’t know what a hollaback girl is, but she wants to hurt you, bad.
And I quote:

“Oooh, this my Shit , this my Shit  [4x]

I heard that you were talking shit

And you didn't think that I would hear it

People hear you talking like that, getting everybody fired up

So I'm ready to attack, gonna lead the pack

Gonna get a touchdown, gonna take you out

That's right, put your pom-poms down, getting everybody fired up”

It is possible that Alexandra chose it because it's educational, though.
Later in the song, Gwen Stefani helpfully spells out the name of
a tasty and nutritious fruit: 

"This shit is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S"
Perhaps she has plans for future songs where she shows children the joys of
spelling other useful words like "papaya" and "litchi nut"?

It's a very, very strange song.
The word shit is repeated many, many times.I wondered why the
twins hadn’t mentioned this little problem.    
But it turns out that Mal and Al didn’t  see any problem at all.
“Alexandra already picked the song and planned out the dance.
We didn’t want to hurt her feelings.”  Mallory explained afterwards in the car.

“Besides, the other girls don’t even know what the words mean,”
Alexa added.  “And Mallory and I just sing ‘This my chip!”
She illustrated this point by crunching an imaginary potato chip.

Works for me..

When I got home, I did a little internet research and came across this very funny analysis
of the song.
The fact-based Wikipedia take on it can be found here.
Neither of these sources mentions potato chips.