Javanese marriage is marriage that fulfilled by ceremonies. Ingredients that used in the ceremonies are to much and sometimes unique. Even chicken egg is used in a ceremony.
Showing posts with label culture. Show all posts
Showing posts with label culture. Show all posts
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Breaking Egg in Javanese Marriage and its Values
Javanese marriage is marriage that fulfilled by ceremonies. Ingredients that used in the ceremonies are to much and sometimes unique. Even chicken egg is used in a ceremony.
Monday, August 29, 2011
Sungkeman, A Form of Respect for Older
Sungkeman is unique tradition in Yogyakarta and Center Java, Indonesia. Sungkeman is from word sungkem, activity to ask blessing by kneel down and kiss someone’s hand. It’s part of Java culture. It usually committed in marriage ritual and in Idul Fitri (Ied, Ied-ul Fitr). It’s a touching moment.
As a ritual in marriage program, the bride and bride-room commit sungkeman to their parent. They purpose to ask praying and blessing of the parent. Whereas sungkeman in Idul Fitri is done not only to parent, but to the other that older. The other that older, like older brother/sister, grandfather/grandmother, uncle/aunt, even neighbor that close.
Read more: Sungkeman, A Form of Respect for Older
Read more: Sungkeman, A Form of Respect for Older
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Ramadhan in Indonesia
Ramadhan is one of month of Islamic Calender. It's called Bulan Suci Ramadhan (holy month Ramadhan). As long as Ramadhan, the Islamic followers are obligated to fasting. No eat, no drink, no sex, no angry, and other passions that forbidden, from sunrise to sunset.
Ramadhan is meaningfull month for the Islamic followers, including in Indonesia. Not only in angle of worship (relation between human and God), but also in angle of interpersonal relation (relation between human and other humans).
Its looked in custom in Indonesian society that traditional-religious, even before enter Ramadhan month. In Sya'ban, month before Ramadhan, people always do certain ritual/ceremony. In Central Java (particularly in Jogjakarta and Solo), there is still program 'Nyadran' or 'Ruwahan'. In the program, people cook ketan, kolak and apem, traditional foods. Then the foods are distributed to others (usually neighbour and close family), as 'sedekahan' or shadaqah (gift). And then they will commit ziarah kubur, go to cemetery of their parent or theie families to pray to God for the deceaseds.
Because Ramadhan is holy month so to enter it a muslim must be clean, body and soul. In the day of end of Sya'ban month, to clean the body, people commit 'padusan'. Padusan is take a wash to be clean. Some people do it in swimming-pool, river, even in beach. They usually do padusan together with family or friens. It's form of togetherness. But for one that prefer practicality and efficency, she/he will do padusan only at home, in the bathroom. Of course, alone.
And to clean the soul, they will apologize each other before enter Ramadahan. Apologetical statement is done by face to face, also via phone, sms, email anf facebook.
In the Ramadhan, the atmosphere look like different from other months. There are spirit, togetherness and holy.
In family area, Ramadhan is time to unite all family members. Sometimes because of daily activity all family members seldom commit breakfast or dinner together. But in Ramadhan they will eat together., in sahur (eat before fasting) and buka (eat to end the fasting). They also will go to mosque together.
Not only from mosque, from almost every house will be heard Quran reading. Everyone compete to read Quran, even to khatam it as most as posible. Everyone compete to make kindness. They compete to shadaqah, including to give foods for the fasting people in the mosque. They do that because of Allah. That's why Ramadhan is called worship month.
While, the youngs every night (after midnight) will walk around the village by hit kenthongan (traditional alarm), to make people wake up to sahur. They will shou, "Sahur..Sahuur... Sahuuur!!"
Marhaban Ya Ramadhan....
Ramadhan is meaningfull month for the Islamic followers, including in Indonesia. Not only in angle of worship (relation between human and God), but also in angle of interpersonal relation (relation between human and other humans).
Its looked in custom in Indonesian society that traditional-religious, even before enter Ramadhan month. In Sya'ban, month before Ramadhan, people always do certain ritual/ceremony. In Central Java (particularly in Jogjakarta and Solo), there is still program 'Nyadran' or 'Ruwahan'. In the program, people cook ketan, kolak and apem, traditional foods. Then the foods are distributed to others (usually neighbour and close family), as 'sedekahan' or shadaqah (gift). And then they will commit ziarah kubur, go to cemetery of their parent or theie families to pray to God for the deceaseds.
Because Ramadhan is holy month so to enter it a muslim must be clean, body and soul. In the day of end of Sya'ban month, to clean the body, people commit 'padusan'. Padusan is take a wash to be clean. Some people do it in swimming-pool, river, even in beach. They usually do padusan together with family or friens. It's form of togetherness. But for one that prefer practicality and efficency, she/he will do padusan only at home, in the bathroom. Of course, alone.
And to clean the soul, they will apologize each other before enter Ramadahan. Apologetical statement is done by face to face, also via phone, sms, email anf facebook.
In the Ramadhan, the atmosphere look like different from other months. There are spirit, togetherness and holy.
In family area, Ramadhan is time to unite all family members. Sometimes because of daily activity all family members seldom commit breakfast or dinner together. But in Ramadhan they will eat together., in sahur (eat before fasting) and buka (eat to end the fasting). They also will go to mosque together.
Not only from mosque, from almost every house will be heard Quran reading. Everyone compete to read Quran, even to khatam it as most as posible. Everyone compete to make kindness. They compete to shadaqah, including to give foods for the fasting people in the mosque. They do that because of Allah. That's why Ramadhan is called worship month.
While, the youngs every night (after midnight) will walk around the village by hit kenthongan (traditional alarm), to make people wake up to sahur. They will shou, "Sahur..Sahuur... Sahuuur!!"
Marhaban Ya Ramadhan....
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Islam and Adat: Kawelasan and Pitulungan
Several times ago, Mr Dodo, my neighbour, gave his daughter in marriage. In Java tradition there are marriage ceremonies. One of them is ngeterke manten (accompany married couple). That is, the parent and family of the bride and some neighbours accompany newly married couple go to house of the bride-groom’s parent after 5-7 days living in house of bride’s parent. (Usually after ijab-kabul and party performed by bride side, the newly married couple live in house of bride’s parent).
Ngeterke manten is term of bride family. For the bride-groom and his family, it named boyongan, namely invite the bride entering the bride-groom's family.
In this program usually the married couple wear the marriage costume and sometimes there are re-party, but the party is performed by bride-groom family.
In ngeterke manten program, the bride family bring some gift, usually foods. Each Javanese has his reckoning about the gift, so did mr Dodo. There were 11 foods for gift. Eleven in Java is sewelas. From word sewelas take word welas (touched). “Hoping God will touch the couple with love,” mr Dodo said.
And repeatedly mr Dodo said that the team must go at 7 o’clock. Why must at 7 o’clock? Seven in Java is pitu. Pitu is taken from word pitulungan (help).”Hoping God will always help new couple,” mr Dodo said again.
That's hope, that's pray of Mr Dodo. It can be understood, because for a muslim, every word is pray. So every mr. Dodo's words in the program is his prays for the couple. Prays were symbolized by tradition.
That’s Javanese. The Javanese always keeps the tradition. As muslim, they obey Islamic Law, and the Adat Law too.
Ngeterke manten is term of bride family. For the bride-groom and his family, it named boyongan, namely invite the bride entering the bride-groom's family.
In this program usually the married couple wear the marriage costume and sometimes there are re-party, but the party is performed by bride-groom family.
In ngeterke manten program, the bride family bring some gift, usually foods. Each Javanese has his reckoning about the gift, so did mr Dodo. There were 11 foods for gift. Eleven in Java is sewelas. From word sewelas take word welas (touched). “Hoping God will touch the couple with love,” mr Dodo said.
And repeatedly mr Dodo said that the team must go at 7 o’clock. Why must at 7 o’clock? Seven in Java is pitu. Pitu is taken from word pitulungan (help).”Hoping God will always help new couple,” mr Dodo said again.
That's hope, that's pray of Mr Dodo. It can be understood, because for a muslim, every word is pray. So every mr. Dodo's words in the program is his prays for the couple. Prays were symbolized by tradition.
That’s Javanese. The Javanese always keeps the tradition. As muslim, they obey Islamic Law, and the Adat Law too.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Mahar
Mahar (mahr, marriage gold) is a gift given by the bride-groom to bride, formed good, money or service as long as uncontrovene Islamic Law. Mahar is regulated in Compilation of Islamic Law article 30-38.
Bride-groom obligate to pay mahar to bride. Amount, form and kind of mahar are based on agreement of both sides. Islam urge to certain mahar based on simple and easy principle.
Usually bride-groom gives a series of sholat tool as mahar, or money adapted with special date for instance date of marriage. Indonesians are not care about cost of mahar, cheap or expensive. They prefer to special or sentimental things , memorable mahar. Although very cheap as for content memorabilia, they will take it. On the contrary, although expensive as long as content memorabilia, they will take it too.
That’s why Yenny Wahid, daughter of ex-President of Indonesia Abdurrahman Wahid, got 10 cows as mahar from her husband. Cow as mahar is uncommon in Indonesia today. In a press conference after married, the couple said that beside unique, the reason of choice of mahar form was reanimate their ancestors tradition.
Mahar is given to bride directly, and it become her personal right sence then. It is handed in cash, but it can delayed all or partly as long as bride agree. Delayed mahar become bride-groom’s debt.
Is marriage valid if there negligence of mention kind and amount of mahar at akad nikah?Obligation to give away mahar is not rukun nikah. So that negligence of mention kind and amount of mahar is not result in void of marriage. And existance mahar debt is not reduce validity of marriage.
How about bride and mahar if the marriage break is?Breaking of marriage is caused by talak (divorce) and death. If a husband divorce his wife qobla al dukhul (without touch his wife), so that he obligate to pay ½ from mahar certained in akad nikah (look Quran 2:237). And if husband dead qobla al dukhul, so that all certained mahar become wife’s right.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Peminangan (Proposal of Marriage)
Peminangan (proposal of marriage)is a process of marriage ceremony that done before getting married. It regulated on Compilation of Islamic Law in Indonesia (KHI) article 11, 12, and 13. Peminangan is made by a man or his representative.
A man can propose a girl or widow after her iddah is finish. Iddah is waiting-time for a widow.There are certain women that prohibited by a man. They are:
1. A woman who fallen talaq (divorce) by her husband, and still in iddah raj’iah.
2. A woman who has proposed by a man else and the proposal has not broken yet or the proposal has not rejected yet.
In many parts of Indonesia, enforcement of Islamic marriage is united in the Adat ceremony, included peminangan/lamaran (proposal of marriage). For example in Java. The proposal is made by the parents of boy to the parents of girl. It is usually made as a request by the one family to become the in-laws of other. Usually, it always conveyed by a representative, someone very close to the boy’s family. Today because of practicability, it is often done by the parents themselves.
The proposal has not resulted in legal consequence yet. The proposal can broken by a boy for there is a statement about broken of the proposal or on the quiet the boy keeps away from and leaves the girl.
Boy and girl have the same right. Even has been request/conection, a boy’s side or a girl’s side are free to break proposal conection. Freedom to break proposal conection is done with good ways according to religious values and custom. It is important in order to keep peace between one and the other, and to keep honor each other.
Usually before make a proposal, the parents of boy had investigated about the girl and her family, also about probability the proposal accepted. On the contrary, before accept the proposal, parents of the girl has also investigated the boy and his family. It accordings to Java idiom bibit bobot bebet, that the parents will see descended, capability and dignity before take someone become their child-in-laws. In Islam there is Sunnah Rasul that someone is married for beauty, wealth, dignity and religious.
After the proposal accepted, the result is not directly a marriage. There is a priod of engagement. The engagement is based on an agreement between the families of the future bride and groom. Thus, there are rights and duties between the couple and their families. Engagement is started by giving a special gift (money or goods) from the boy’s side to the girl’s side. In most regional language, the word for engagement gift is panjer or panganchang or pengikat (binder), and it is taken from verb mengikat (to bind). The mean, there is connection between 2 families.
Today, there is an exchange of rings by the couple themselves, and the engagement begins from the moment of exchange. Thus, the formal binding of the families has to some extent been indicated by the binding of the couple. The program of giving binder and exchange of the rings are attended by the families and certain neighbours, and then are followed by a communal feast (slametan/syukuran/tasyakuran). The slametan is given by the girl’s parents.
A man can propose a girl or widow after her iddah is finish. Iddah is waiting-time for a widow.There are certain women that prohibited by a man. They are:
1. A woman who fallen talaq (divorce) by her husband, and still in iddah raj’iah.
2. A woman who has proposed by a man else and the proposal has not broken yet or the proposal has not rejected yet.
In many parts of Indonesia, enforcement of Islamic marriage is united in the Adat ceremony, included peminangan/lamaran (proposal of marriage). For example in Java. The proposal is made by the parents of boy to the parents of girl. It is usually made as a request by the one family to become the in-laws of other. Usually, it always conveyed by a representative, someone very close to the boy’s family. Today because of practicability, it is often done by the parents themselves.
The proposal has not resulted in legal consequence yet. The proposal can broken by a boy for there is a statement about broken of the proposal or on the quiet the boy keeps away from and leaves the girl.
Boy and girl have the same right. Even has been request/conection, a boy’s side or a girl’s side are free to break proposal conection. Freedom to break proposal conection is done with good ways according to religious values and custom. It is important in order to keep peace between one and the other, and to keep honor each other.
Usually before make a proposal, the parents of boy had investigated about the girl and her family, also about probability the proposal accepted. On the contrary, before accept the proposal, parents of the girl has also investigated the boy and his family. It accordings to Java idiom bibit bobot bebet, that the parents will see descended, capability and dignity before take someone become their child-in-laws. In Islam there is Sunnah Rasul that someone is married for beauty, wealth, dignity and religious.
After the proposal accepted, the result is not directly a marriage. There is a priod of engagement. The engagement is based on an agreement between the families of the future bride and groom. Thus, there are rights and duties between the couple and their families. Engagement is started by giving a special gift (money or goods) from the boy’s side to the girl’s side. In most regional language, the word for engagement gift is panjer or panganchang or pengikat (binder), and it is taken from verb mengikat (to bind). The mean, there is connection between 2 families.
Today, there is an exchange of rings by the couple themselves, and the engagement begins from the moment of exchange. Thus, the formal binding of the families has to some extent been indicated by the binding of the couple. The program of giving binder and exchange of the rings are attended by the families and certain neighbours, and then are followed by a communal feast (slametan/syukuran/tasyakuran). The slametan is given by the girl’s parents.
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