Wednesday, March 18, 2009
ELIMINATION! Japan vs. Cuba, winner plays tomorrow for seeding, loser goes home. Two teams that care VERY DEEPLY about this tournament, and will be GREATLY HUMILIATED if they lose. Someone is going to feel very, very bad at the end of this one! YOU ARE EXCITED TO WATCH IT!!
The Battle for Orestes Destrade's Heart!
postscript: things we learned from this game:
--when it is foggy, turn off the freakin' greenscreen ads, just turn them off, they will not work properly --Orestes Destrade knows all the languages --Ariel Pestano is SO ANGRY --Yulieski Gonzalez and Ariel Pestano= hatelove --Hisashi Iwakuma is groundball pitching magic --Hisashi Iwakuma= Bambi --don't use illegal drugs, or Dave Winfield will bust you --Ismel Jimenez has a hypnotic ass
Many thanks to Tony, ivantopumpyouup, and Snuppy the Hound for suffering through the fog and ESPN2's determination to give their sponsors what they paid for, even though it was screwing up the entire broadcast!Labels: Cuba, Japan, liveblog, World Baseball Classic
2:07 PM
Sunday, March 15, 2009
A return to liveblogging after a brief hiatus! I know you are all terribly, terribly excited, by which I mean that I fully expect to be doing this one on my own. Expect rambling. I believe that our announcing team will consist of Gary Thorne, Steve Phillips, and Orel Hershiser.
postscript: things we learned from this game:
--Orestes!!!! --Panama Hat Radar Gun Man!! --Yosvani Peraza= Cuban Cecil Fielder --Japan headed to America with humiliation in their hearts --Orestes Destrade is a multilingual genius of words --the first Japanese player in MLB was not Hideo Nomo, stop lying to us ESPN2 --San Diego sunlight hates baseball --Steve Phillips has been sneaking into WBC ballplayer hotel rooms and also going with them to SeaWorld --Ariel Pestano= Cuban Mike Sciosia --Yulieski Gonzalez looks like Jeff Francoeur a little bit, true fact --ORESTES!!!!
Many thanks to Snuppy the Hound and ivantopumpyouup for joining me in this exercise in baseball humiliation!Labels: Cuba, Japan, liveblog, World Baseball Classic
1:08 PM
Sunday, March 08, 2009
I do not promise that this will work because I will be relying on a sneaky wireless signal, but I am going to try to liveblog a game that is not in Pool A. South Africa vs. Cuba, 2 pm Sunday afternoon. There are two underwear models on the South African team and basically nobody on their roster actually plays baseball; I expect this will be fun. Or terrible! Or terribly good fun.
postscript: things we learned from this game:
--Norge Vera is the new El Duque --Charley Steiner is a terrible play-by-play man --South Africa's only functional play is the pick-off move --Charley Steiner hates baseball and fun --Team Cuba's trainer is Fidel Castro's son --Pool B is the worst pool --dude in the Panama hat with the enormous cigar is awesome and should have announced the game --seriously fuck Charley Steiner, he is trying to ruin baseball
Thanks to ivantopumpyouup, Snuppy the Hound, and briefly ashmark for suffering, suffering so much.
This was the worst game.Labels: Cuba, liveblog, South Africa, World Baseball Classic
8:40 AM
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