Early on... A post from the early days

I think since today is Madison's 19th birthday...wait, lemme rephrase that...her NINETEENTH birthday!!!!....i should post something from those days that lasted such precious little time.  Nineteen years have slipped by so unbelievably fast.  I do not regret a bit of it...the only thing i regret...not writing it all  down as it happened.  

Anyhoo... a couple obligatory pix of then...and now.  

From 

Thought ya'll might like to see the progress....and for some...the news. for those whom this comes as a surprise this is Madison Emilee. she is now 3 mo. and one week. She was born March 21.

Her current hobbies include but not limited to discovering her voice, laughing, watching baseball, and most importantly spending time with mom and dad. She goes every morning to Lake Hefner and walks with mom and her aunt Kim Creekmore. 

The rest of her days busy schedule involves watching mom around the house, looking at the coonhounds in the backyard, sleeping on her blanket, and looking over mom's shoulder. She has now undertaken the daunting task of learning to turn over, progress is good, and she likes to reward her efforts (to mom's chagrine) by sticking her fingers in her mouth. She has a beautiful smile and greets her dad with it every morning when he wakes up and when he gets home from work in the evening, mom gets it all day. "Full-time Mommyhood RULES!!" quothes the mom, and we're pretty sure thats what Madison is saying too, or something to that extent. 

Her musical interests seem to center around the classics, namely, Vivaldi, Barber, Haydn, Saint-Saens, and Toby Keith. Well, i'll have to keep you up to date later...diaper to change.

love you all!

Jay Tammy and Madison

and here we are...19 years later,  and she's grown more amazing every day. 

Castling...

Hey folks...it's tornado season...take it from someone who has lived in The Alley my entire life...just STAY OUT OF THE WAY. Refer to this post if you need a refresher course. And please, if you don't or those in your community don't take that advice...please don't get on the news and tell me how it a.) sounded like a freight train, and b.) tell me how your community is pulling together to make something of your warzone. So far its the worst season in twenty years, it's not the worst ever, and it's not a 'sign of the times'...it's the weather, it gets crazy every few years, it's the way the planet operates, it's cyclical climate ebb and flow, it's happened for millinnia, it will continue to happen for the same.

Of course, for those of us in The Kingdom, we have skipped The Alley for more stable environs. We left on Sunday for sunny CO. As opposed to where Le Castille is, where it hit the lower 90's today and expecting upper 90's tomorrow, we are happily basking in mid-60's and looking for a nice April shower tomorrow. Therefore, we are hitting the North American Wildlife Museum for 1/3 homeschool field trips on the slate for this week.

On the way here we detoured to the Bishop's Castle in SECO. I hadn't been there since...lord, maybe '83, the brotha has made some progress since i last saw his requiem to a dying world. Still and even, it's a sight to behold. If you get a couple hours and its a nice day...circumnavigate yourself the extra hour and get some fresh air and sunshine in the San Isabel n.p. It's a beautiful drive.

The Royals loved the Castle! I had promised them a surprise that would make their heads spin and i didn't disappoint. It was a grand adventure for them all! Though The Drama Princess didn't much care for the swaying tendencies of the lower spire and didn't go all the way to the top. I didn't allow the other two adrenaline junkies to accompany me to the very top spire in the tallest tower, it was just too treacherous for them as Mr. Bishop isn't governed by OSHA standards...at all.

Oddly enough, HRH declined the trip to the above picture. The adrenaline junkie of the family had her limit and decided to stay in safer, less moving terrain with The Queen, who is apparently bereft of adrenaline, and the X, who has too much to make the trek. These two, again as odd as it may seem, didn't mind the swaying and stayed with me to the top. As you can see, the wind was whipping through the enclosure and slowly swayed the entire structure...which added to the pucker factor.

Anyhoo, it will be interesting to see Mr. Bishop's progress in a few more years. That's about it, by batteries are wearing down...and not just on the computer.

Momentum...

I don't really talk much about what I do. But for once, finally, in my life, I'm doing something for a living that I really enjoy. On top of that, I'm working with people I love being around. Not that every day is striking through the daisies, but I've just never had a job that I still enjoyed this much after this long.
Add to that that this is a start up and ask the stress normally associated with those. Again, I'm not saying we don't have trying days, but those make the easy days that much more enjoyable.
Even now I'm in a time of transition, the reserve financing that we had for the start up is gone. Which means if some thing doesn't start happening soon, we may need to pull the plug.
I honestly can't see that happening, theres just too much potential energy just about to turn kinetic. The snow ball we've been packing and rolling to the edge of the precipice is just about to gain its own momentum, and once it begins its descent, I don't think there will be any stopping it...not that we would want to, but sometimes it's almost scary thinking how big it could get...and how quickly it could get there.
Hopefully, sometime soon, you'll be in your local marketplace and see one of our tags and go. "Hey, i know the guy who helped start that company!" If you do, buy a shirt or a hat or whatever it is...support your local school...and your friends at The Table.

posted from Bloggeroid

Broken Spells...

What monster hath mine hand wrought? In my quest to shy away from things (read 'foods') pre-made, precooked, or otherwise manufactured before it gets to my table, I think I may have made a slight error.

I've wanted for years to get my children to stop eating that ghastly orangish/yellow goo that proceeds out of that blue Kraft box. You know that chemically produced "cheese" over "pasta" after adding what they removed at the factory- milk and butter. Of course, those things were never really there, Kraft just likes you to think they were. I digress into my conspiracy theorist mind...and we really don't want to go there at The Happy Table. (Refer to Food Inc. et al.)

So, I have this bright idea that I'll show them what REAL mac and cheese tastes like. A couple sticks of raw cream butter, about a half pound of some Braums fresh colby jack cheese, and the coup de grace- a couple cups of beautiful raw milk bechamel later...and the obligatory elbow mac (maccheroni to you aficianados)...oh ok, I did throw in about a cup of fresh bacon bits, and some Ritz crackers crushed on top. I realize I sweetened the deal a bit on the last two items but hey, its my family, my table, and my sales pitch-

Kraft vs King...

Seriously.

Kraft pled nolo contendere...

Of course you did you chemically deformed losers. It was a turkey shoot.

The Prince, at one point, looked up like the third little piggy from the trough and stated, "thish ish the besh mac an cheev evah". The rest of the little piggies around the trough nodded and squealed/grunted their agreement.

The masses clamor for more...

Since then, I've made mac and cheese 3x...and its not only getting faster, its getting better. Tonight, i had basically ruined some by using Muenster to supplement the depleted Cojack...friendly word of advice, Muenster is great on sandwiches, it does NOT melt well. It clumped into these chewy cheesygooboogers, but the bechamel championed the cause and saved the day.

I know what Gene Wilder felt when he cried "Its Alive!"

Fortunately, I think the evil Kraft spell has been broken, and brighter culinary days ahead for my little epicureans.

posted from Bloggeroid

For the love of the Game...

Tonight I introduced a new game to the Royals. I've been working on this game for a number of years, and think I am finally ready to launch the prototypical version. I'm affectionately calling it...The 7 o' Diamonds game.

If you'd like to play the rules are simple...i am the Head Official amd keeper of the 7 of diamonds playing card. This card acts not unlike a yellow or red card in a soccer match(or if you happen to be an expatriated Euro, like my red coated brother Mr.G.- "proper football"). This means that if you, as one of my children, act inappropriately in a public place, or in an area where I deem it feasible to enforce the power of The Card that Pays You Back, you get carded, i.e I flash the card at you. This is your "yellow" card, your warning...tone it down or judgment draweth nigh.
Should you continue in said ill advised behavior, I GIVE you the card. This is where the real game begins...you have basically just received your 'red card'. The 7 of diamonds is then to remain on your person until we arrive back at The Friendly Confines of The Kingdom. You may, well actually you are required at that time to produce said card and trade it in for one lick from its effectual counterpart, THE 7 of diamonds.

If you are unfamiliar with this instrument of justice, it is described as 18 inches of the Wrath of the Almighty. Increasing its aweful sight and sound with 28 holes drilled through the half inch of gopher wood, in the pattern and design of seven adjacent diamonds. Hence the moniker.

Should you fail to produce the card, the wooden form shall be administered thrice the original number. Otherwise, only the original number shall be applied.

Upon the addition of a special substitute official, i.e. the babysitter, the market price for bad behavior increases dramatically. Should that official have the unfortunate duty of having to even present the card as a yellow...the penalty shall be two licks. Should the penalized player continue to perform poorly and a red card must be produced, a double penalty shall be assessed.

Of course, rewards for good behavior are awarded at the discretion of the Head Official and Referee, but these awards are for exemplary service and behavior above and beyond the normal expectations.

That's the game. Simple as it is, it has its intricacies. Of course, judgment is always tempered with mercy, that mercy being inversely proportional to greater age and understanding.

So, if you see me flash the 7o'Diamonds in a restaurant near you, you'll know the game has just begun.

posted from Bloggeroid

Kids these days...

You know...we've just got great kids.  I mean, they do kid stuff and have to be given some correction or direction and we move on, but, good lord, they are just really good kids.  I can't imagine what it's like for parents whose kids hate them or don't want them to be around them or vice versa.  We love playing with our kids on the Wii (The X bowled a 123 the other night...he's two) or just like tonight The Prosecutor asks me to play Mille Bornes with her after dinner. 

So we got dinner cleaned up, finished making the butter i had started and while all the others were scrolling through Netflix watching the latest Caillou (which The X totally loves) The Prosecutor and i rolled through a game of Mille Bornes.  I won.  "Oh", you think, "how could you beat your 6 year old!"  Listen, she beat the living crap outta me last time and laughed while she did it.  You come over, get the cards out and let her roll you up into a little ball and we'll see what you say after that.

I got a report from The Queen today that...oh man, can i digress just a bit?  I just want to lob in here that we got these sweet new phones...both of us took a major upgrade and got our digital on with Droid X's.  I gotta tell'ya these are not phones, they are 'communication devices'.  If the internet is the Information Superhighway then these are the Supercharged Mini Coopers blazing down the track at unsconcionable speeds...and the scenery is just unfreakingbelievable.  You know what we can do now?  We are laying in bed playing Scrabble on our phones!  IT'S GREAT!  Shoot, i can even watch MOVIES on my PHONE!   It's crazy... i don't even know what all this thing will do...yet.

ANYHOO...i got this report today from The Queen.  She had loaded up some 'Sweet Home Alabama' on her phone and had hooked it up to the Auditory Command Center in the mess hall.  So she is cranking out that sweet hymn and kids came running from every corner of the house and start air banding when The Prince states, "THAT...IS...MY...MOST...FAVORITE...SONG...EVER!!!"

Four years old...and that boy is a musical connoisseur already.

We got great kids.

Great...

Well folks...i think this will be about as official as it gets.  I've done the research, looked at the pics and i'm 99 and 44 100th's percent sure...we got us a ...oh my lord. 

Rewind 5 months ago.

I'm driving to work one morning about 6:30, it ain't dark, but it sho ain't light.  The sun was just tinging a few whispy late summer clouds in the sky the faintest tangerine.  A few stars were still lolling about, i got some Marley singing about Three Little Birds.  I'm on the outskirts of town where houses are few and far between and the few that are there...well remember that old song by Confederate Railroad that harmonizes with "i like my women just a little on the trashy side..."?  well, this is where they live.  Ahead in the wash of the headlights i see something in the middle of the road...its white...and its...moving?  What the...whoa!  Did i miss it?  Yeah,  what the...what WAS that?  So i slow down, stop and shove it in R.  The wash of the backup lights weren't very good so i stop before i roll over whatever that white ball of fur was, i open my door and i exhale a cursory amount of steam into the morning air..."oh...crap...it's a freaking...puppy."  And i aint just talking about a puppy...he was a low down, outta town, mama let me down, please don't take me to the pound kinda puppy.  He waddles to me feet and looked up..." Mister, you wouldn't BELIEVE the night i've had...i'm cold, i can't tell ya the last time i ate, and please don't ask me what happened to the end of my tail."  I looked and sho enough...he was missing the fur on the last 1/4 of his long tail.

So there i am...i got a full day of house building ahead of me, and a puppy looking like he just lost his last friend to a pack of coyotes..."Well...hell...git in."   Y'all ever seen that cartoon where the dude turns into a SUCKER when the realization hits him?  That's me with puppies, except mine flashes neon green.  Of course, this one didn't know it, didn't care.  He curled up on my lap and was OUT inside of a mile and didn't wake up til i moved him to the floorboard about 20 minutes later.

I texted The Queen, "I got a problem."   Of course, with a txt like that, all kinds of things are going through her mind...she NEVER expected the following txt to show this...

"Oh...he's SO CUTE!"  Yep, i married a SUCKER that flashes neon pink.

"We ain't keepin him, General Beauregard's enough for us."

"OK" (knowing the inevitable).

So, i get him home...the kids NAME him. 

Moses.

lord, now what do i do?

So here we are five months removed, he used to be a 1/4 the size of, now he's easily DOUBLE the size of The General (not that vertically that's a challenge, but take it from me, he's not gonna be the smallish bottle of fur i thought he was gonna be).

I finally got some time today to do some research...

lord.  

This is what i found out.

Great...

I should admit at this point, he's passed every test on my radar, and i think he's gonna be a great dog.

just a few more days...

just...horribly...tired.  and the outlook isn't extremely bright.  Tulsa on Monday, OKC today, Colorado Springs tomorrow, and home on Sunday.  Only to go to Little Rock on Thursday.  Then, maybe things will stabilize for awhile...but for now...i'm actually looking forward to 10 hours in a car...doing absolutely nothing but reading some Sherlock Holmes and looking out for deer, antelope...or even better...an elk or two. 

noodding off, so i bettter sign off...

Trying a restart...

Its not much but...i can NOT stop laughing at some of the comments on this one.  If you haven't checked it out before Awkward Family Photos is a place to blow a rainy afternoon or two.

The X and The Prince sorely needed baths tonight, after a full couple days of boy time in the dogs and dirt,  The Queen simply couldn't take it anymore and escorted them to the bathchamber.  They are good with it, they like their mansoap. 

I'm laying on the bed watching the Sooner Football Replay (which unless you live under a rock...WE ARE GOING TO THE BIG 12 CG next Saturday!) and i hear the familiar 2 year old siren wind up, and a fuzzy peach streak rounds the corner with a full head of steam..."Shiney hiney, shiney hiney, shineeee hineeeeeeey!!!"  He changes vector to 180* and heads into the living room.  All i hear is the stoccato of bare feet and the slowly fading siren as he makes his way to the back of the house to terrorize Femme Royale.

Of course, to his chagrin, all they do is squiggle (thats a combo of squeal and giggle) and proceed to chase him all the way back to me trying to get a little pinch of the advertised. 

Cardsharps...

With the basic 1-9 addition facts in the mental books of HRH and The Prosecutor, it was time to pull out the Mille Bornes and begin play...

It's not so much that i lost TWICE to a six year old, not that at all...it's that she brags about it... all...the...way...to...bed.

Mille Bornes teaches so many good skills to kids, obviously addition, paying attention, reading comprehension, paying attention, good sportsmanship, paying attention, and above all...sticking it to Dad as much and as often as possible, because you KNOW that if he gets the chance, he will do the same to you, without remorse.

So, with that in mind...i'll slog off to their royal bedchamber and begin an installment of John Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress...

"Art thou for something rare, and profitable
Wouldest thou see a Truth within a Fable?"

Ah loves me some Bunyan.

Wanna quickie?

I gotta get these in before they are gone...

Its morning and the Royals are foraging for food while The Queen lays quietly, relishing the last vestiges of the pastels in the rising sun. The pastoral moment dissipates with...

"Mama...look at THIS!" as The Prosecutor holds a very large member of the Insectum family over The Queen's nose.

"Is it...dead?"

In ubiquitous superhero fashion, The Prince, legs widespread, fists on hips..."NO, MOM.  He's just standing still."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Enter stage right, HRH frowning, "Hey Mom?"

"Yes?"

"What's that pink punching bag for?"

"What? What are you talking about? What punching bag?"

"You know, that punching bag in the back of your throat?"

That Look...

Hold on...i have no idea where this one's going...you can thank MamaLou for bringing this up...like yesterdays breakfast.

Every few weeks or so, i'll be in a restaurant, market, sports event, cow chip eating contest, any given area where the general public forages. This inevitable scenario occurs...

I catch a look, a cock of the head, inquisitive eyes, interrogating the memory like a shake down on a petty pickpocket...and the compulsory question, "Do I...?"

"No...you do not know me, i'm not from here, you've never worked with me, we didn't go to school together, and i never dated your sister."

"But you look like..."

"I know...like Nicholas Cage...no? Paul McCartney? Well...doesn't matter, you don't know me... ...really...you don't."

"No...i think i do...somehow."

"No...you don't... ...nohow...i just have a really familiar face...see ya."

I walk away, with them invariably watching me, slowly shaking their head flailing away at the cobwebs from the recesses of their minds, still in some distant denial of my pleas of innocence.

I could never be even a low profile criminal, or on the other side, an undercover cop, black operative agent or the like, i would have to have some kind of distortive surgery.

Whoever that dude is, however he is friends, kin, or aquaintance with all these people, needs to start giving them money so i can start collecting.

That's it...that's what i'm gonna start doing...THIS is the future scenario...

The look, the squint, the cant of the melon...

"Do i...?"

"HEY! Yeah! You DO know me!" I loaned you twenty bucks a couple years ago, and you know...you never paid me back."

I'm certain "that look" will end right there...but who knows...

maybe i'll get lucky.

Deep Fried...Its the Southern Way...

I'm not saying "I'm back!" but...we'll just see what happens from here.  Y'all can blame it on Doc and his Cajun Queen, they made me feel...needed.

So tonight, we're out to visit the newest addition to the Extended Table family, The Little Redcoat was born this morning around 11.  Those of you who know...well, i don't say this about many babies, because to me, honestly, NOT all babies are cute, or pretty, or whatever.  Suffice to say, he's a beautiful baby boy. 

We couldn't stay, the progenitors were completely worn out and sleeping, so i snuck in, left the handmade card from The Royals and laid a nice fat belvedere for The Redcoat on the rollaround table...i took a look at Lil' Redcoat and quietly slipped out.  Congratulations Pete and Laura...seriously beautiful child, can't wait to get my hands on him...and i don't hold a candle to The Queen, she loves her some babies.

We cruised the local dairy mart, where The Queen selected some staples for The Scullery.  Upon re-entry into Odysseus, the obligatory "WHADJA GIT MAMA?!!!!" emanated in various forms from the mizzen section.  "Well...they were running a BOGO special on pig snot, so i picked up two!"

...Quietness from astern..."What?  Pig snot...is that? Ew."

The Queen saw the exposed jugular..."WHAT? You haven't had pig snot?"

Like a wolf smelling blood from miles away i added, "Oh man...a little pig snot fried in butter..." to which The Queen adds, "and a little garlic, salt, and pepper...you haven't LIVED til you've had that!"

The gaping solicitude continued.

"Yeah, deep fried pig snot...mmmmm just melts in your mouth!"

Finally, the disquieted uneasiness is broken by the Prosecutor, "Dad?  Can you put pig snot on the smoker?"

"Nah, smoked pig snot just doesn't work, that'd be like smokin' ice cream or something, it just don't do."

"Mama, did you really get pig snot?" 

Silence...as The Queen turns to me with that beautiful captious grin...

I love that woman.

So, dear reader...share with us YOUR pig snot recipes.  I know they can be family secrets but...we're all family here anyway...

Make Ready....

I've been contemplating this one for awhile.  The main reason for the arid clime of this blog is due to that crazy little thing called life that happens outside these friendly confines.  There is no doubt i love spending time here...its fun, sometimes its just a venue to vent, sometimes just whatever is rolling around in the drafty space between my ears.  But most importantly, as i've said many times, this blog exists for posterity. 

I began this at a point in my life when i had just come home from the workaday world to care for our two children at the time.  We had considered the change for quite some time.  The Queen had much more earning power than i did at the time, and before we were ever married we had made the commitment that no one else was going to raise our children but us.  So, i came home and i've been here since.  That was four years ago.

Since then, we've moved (twice), added two more souls into The Kingdom, and done a lot of cooking.  It's been fun, but the time has come for me to hit the road...literally.  I have an opportunity to go back to work, and i'm taking it.  It has always been a great desire for us to have The Queen be home and raising our brood, now with this opportunity...she can...and believe me, she is excited...she's counting the days.  I'm excited for her.  We are both excited for the bright future this new opportunity presents. 

It's new territory for me, but i know with a lot of hard work, it will definitely pay off...and we'll be better for it, not merely in the plebian realm called Finance, but more importantly in the noble province of Peace...and that is what we are seeking here in The Kingdom...Peace...and Peace far beyond anything finances can bring about.

Now, perceiving what you, dear reader, may be thinking, i am not pulling the plug on the coffee pot and folding up The Table.  I am, however, explaining that the current oases in these barrens may continue for awhile until i...ahem...get my feet wet. 

I've been pretty busy the last few months getting details around The Kingdom wrapped up so that The Queen will have much less to tend to, i.e. wood floors, a privacy fence...those kinds of things.  I'll admit at this point also that it's been much easier to post quick and easy's in that microwave time hole of Facebook, than to actually take some time and write something of quality here.  I still need to put the knife to that little doxy.  All in good time i suppose.

With all that said, since i don't really know how much time i'll be able to give to this blog, since the time requirements are going to be pretty heavy for awhile with the new job...i want you to know...i've enjoyed meeting the new friends i've met.  Its good to know that there are still good folks out there...very few mind you...but they are there. 

And who knows...maybe i'll have more time to write here, maybe i'll get out there and realize just how important this all is...and how much i miss it...and how much i'll miss reading about it in the future.  I don't know...maybe The Queen will be inspired to post...

Gun Shows...

Disclaimer:  For those of you out there that may be offended by guns, gun ownership, gun shows, and just being generally redneck...if you cling to the doltish "Guns kill people" doctrine...this may not be the post for you...exit left...and don't come back.

The rest of you stick around...you gon'like'isun...

When telling folks we home school, i always like to throw in the fact that if a kid brings a knife to our school we are gonna learn how to hone a proper edge on it and make sure the gut hook is ready for action. If a kid brings a gun to our school, we are gonna ensure that proper safety measures are maintained while learning how to quickly field strip and clean said standard issue. We simply don't HAVE any drug problems at our school...and never will.

Of late, we've been having some gun shows. Here's a few pictures for your ogling pleasure...

Now...don't let the pretty faces fool ya...those are locked and LOADED. HRH wielding her family favorite Walther P99c... and The Prosecutor, now what do you think someone with the moniker of The Prosecutor would conceal? Her .45ACP Glock g36's of course! Yeah...its a matched set...beautiful eh?

The Prince sporting his twin Bushmaster ACR's...let's just say, taking care of the sib's is serious business.

Here's The X and his m203 grenade launcher mounted on a sturdy m16 mainframe..."That's right, go ahead...laugh."

Those Boondock Saint boys have some talent, but my boys got the vis viva!

Yes...we are PROUD supporters of the NRA!

Country Club Membership...

Sunday afternoons are pretty lazy around here. If there's football, we watch it...if there's not...well, we find something to do, and since it's not football season...

As previously stated, we are the proud owners (as in shareholders) of a small herd of beautiful Jersey cows...thanks to the good folks over at Phelan Ranch. They are beau-ful. We have chosen lazy Sunday afternoons to go out and reap our stock dividends, so this last Sunday HRH and i took the drive out to the ranch.

It's a little over an hour and it was a great day for a drive. The cinereal sky laden with mist quietly accompanied our journey, softening the greening landscape of southern Oklahoma, and the rocky outcrops that make up South Central's idea of mountains. Once we got off the highway and onto the back roads, which were slogged from the two days of slow steady rain, the dampened warm smells of early spring infiltrated the car and we started looking for wildlife, since we were just barely off the Refuge.

HRH was intent on finding another prairie dog town, but to no avail. We did come across a tom and a few jakes tailing some hens about a hundred yards or so off the road. We stopped and halloo'ed them, in turkey of course, they weren't interested and trotted off to more private climes.

Arriving at the Ranch and opening the doors to that nostalgic smell of barnyard, chickens clucking restfully, and an occasional dim grunt from a couple of the sows behind the barn. The Girls were all huddled around the tractor tire having their afternoon tea and scones. I can't telly'all how i love the smell of wet barnyard...it brings back so many good childhood memories. Even the smell of walking into the ranchhouse smells the same, it must be something innate to every old ranch/farm...that warm smell of old wood and older dirt...it takes you to a place where everything, for just a few seconds...is right.

We visited with Grady and his new bride for a few minutes before hauling our treasure out to the car. They are blessed beyond measure. New love, new life, married to a peaceful ranch on the edge of the mountains where wondering elk call plaintively on cool fall evenings.

Before leaving we went out to say hi to The Girls. They cast a sleepy yet discriminative eye on us as we approached their cliquish little country club meeting. Slowly chewing their scones, and an apathetic bat of an eye greeted us..."Well hey Girls!... Y'all mind if we get a picture?" Mrs. Scarlet lolled her eyes and Annabell shifted her weight to the side, i suppose we were interrupting some Estrofest conversation they were having. Lizzy just kinda smiled and dipped her head back down for another scone, i'm not sure, but i think she might have been trying to stifle a laugh. "I'll take that as a 'Yes'."

That youngin never said much, he just kinda watched us inquisitively, i swear i heard him whisper something like "Momma...go play...little girl?" That was all i caught, but i got the idea. He must've been in some kinda trouble cuz she just swished her tail and blew her nose like she wasn't very interested in any playtime right now.

"Well, thanks Girls, we'll see y'all next week!"

We headed back to the car..."Daddy, do you think they like us?"

The X Factor...

Last Monday The Queen took the day off, gathered up the majority of her young and headed for the Science Museum in OKC.  The X and I looked at each other a few minutes after they left, smiled, and said, "Let's go FISHIN!"

Its been awhile since i made enough time to wet a line, and typically here in OK, mid-March through late April is feast time for largemouth bass.  So...you get a line and i'll get a pole honey!  And away we went.


MamaLou and Toby have a nice pond at their place.  Loch Lazeebee LOOKS like a prime honey hole, I've fished it a number of times but never had much luck. A couple small ones here and there after an hour or so and i packed it in...but that was the past.  Monday was a bit different.

I thought going in it might be a good day, overcast, moderately windy with a cool front pushing in and rain expected later in the week...it had all the earmarks...but there was that confounded history lurking in the back of my head.

So, we greeted the hounds and headed out to The Loch...i had been twice warned that the ticks were particular hungry this year so i had planned to keep a sharp eye on The X as he patrolled the coastline for something, anything to throw into the windswept water.

Two casts in i had hauled in a keeper, a two pounds of shiny green and silver anger.  Now, lemme just say at this point, I don't keep fish, i don't clean fish...honestly, i can probably count on both hands how many fish i've kept in the past 10 years...and i know what you're thinking and your horribly mistaken.  But, maybe its the new diet, but i decided, "Hey, if i catch enough like this..."  So, i pulled out the stringer.

I was in an awkward position about 8' above the water on a cut bank with alot of brush between.  I was also a little wary and concerned that either The X would fall down the bank or get pushed in by the Horsedawg.   Zoe is a Great Dane that absolutely loves kids and she was The X's oversized black shadow all day.  She was either in his face or closely supervising whatever he was doing, i had said, "Zoe NO!" enough times that he finally got the hang of it and was telling her himself, "OEEEE NO!"

So, i decided to move to a better area.  But before i did, i decided to try just one more spot not far off.  I had to carry The X into the brush due to the thickness and briars.  We made it to the waters edge and i made a cast or two, i had a couple bumps but nothing major, on my third cast i placed my plastic worm right where i wanted.  Then, i heard a splash right at my feet and slightly behind me, i turned and looked and The X had bailed into the drink, headfirst. I quickly reached down grabbed him by the waistband and yanked him out.   He came up sputtering and spitting moss, which was all over him resembling a little green Medusa.  He finally got enough out of his throat to begin crying.  It wasn't so much of a wail of fear as it was just plain ole pissed off kinda cry.  I figured fishin around that part might be tainted for a bit and we moved out.

We drove around to the dam where the walking and fishing is much easier.  First cast WHAM! another one out of the same litter as the first one.  The X squealed with delight as i pulled this one out of the water "Da-eee ISH,  Da-eee ISH!" And so began the slaying.  We walked the length of the dam and pulled out  3 or 4 more.  I was about to head over to the side where i would be throwing with the wind instead of by and large, when i drug that plastic worm over a moss bed and about 12 feet out it disappeared and my pole doubled over. The m.o. of the earlier fish had been WHAM!  This was more like a Hoover sucking up a lollipop stuck to the carpet...slow but with fortitude.  I set the hook and started draggin'.  Shaza'am!  I caught me a FISH!  Finally, after all these years, i finally had something worthwhile.  Even The X's eyes shined a little brighter and bigger.

We stayed a little while longer.  While he was making himself busy pitching dried horse biscuits in to feed the fish, i casted here and there in opportune looking spots and pulled in a few more, throwing back a few that didn't measure up or i didn't feel like walking around to put on the stringer.

Once i caught The X with a three foot straw of prairie grass, he had pulled it out and was trying to cast it like a fishing pole toward the water...he just threw it in.

All in all, i think i had about 20 pounds of fish on the stringer, and decided to call it a day and get them home to clean.  To my recollection, it was my best day of fishing ever, it must've been The X Factor.

The Coachecutor...

You may or may not know this, but, i've put in some more garden beds this year. A couple raised beds for veggies and such. Some cedar trunks form the structure of the beds and they are hefty and should last for many years to come. As soon as i finish terracing them and get them planted i'll provide some pics.

That said, there are still some large pieces of cedar lying about. The Royals find these extremely magnetic and gravitate towards them while playing in the yard. Usually they use them for balance beams (since they've started gymnastics) or some kind of support for whatever fort they are conceptualizing in their minds.

Saturday morning they had all gone out to survey anything that had occurred during the night before. I was fixing breakfast, which was almost done so i called them in. When they entered the door The Queen was laughing hysterically and tearfully relayed this little ditty...

When i called them for breakfast, HRH who had been balance beam walking one of the cedar limbs under the critical eye of The Prosecutor, tried a dismount up onto the patio, she failed miserably and took a Pete Rose onto the hard pan of the patio. Laying there trying to figure out if she's hurt or not with The Prosecutor standing over her sardonic and unflinching, with hand on hip...

"Girl, you gotta stick that landing."

Pickin' Bones...

Now...y'all know i like cookin'...and lately its been French. In fact, last night it was Fondue de Poulet a la Creme (chicken simmered with cream and onions), some peas with butter and shallots, and sweet corn maque choux. Of course, the maque choux ain't French, it's Cajun...well, more Creole, but it just seemed to fit (and no, i don't need the history lesson on the Accadians or Accadiana and maque choux). Lord... I'll be making that one again.

While we're on the subject...one of my favorite subjects...i suppose its time to let y'all know somethin. I've embarked on a journey into food. I realize that most of you are thinking, "Dude, that is not news." Ahhh, but it is.

See, for years i've been cooking with inferior products and it has affected my health and the health of my family. I've decided that its time for a Change...if i could borrow a bastardized slogan. The quality of processed food available for purchase at your local DevilMart or Sam's or Homeland or Publix or...you get the picture, is mediocre at best and harmful at worst (because of the hormones, pesticides, or chemically altered states that they are in).

Well, dude, if you can't buy food there, a) Where do you plan on getting it? and b) How much do you plan on PAYING for "higher quality food"? Those are excellent questions... and to keep from boring you with the particulars...Farmer's Markets, Food Co-ops, and...of all things, local dairies...that's right folks...they STILL exist. In fact, we are visiting a local farm on Saturday to do a face to face handshake and sit down around their table and talk homestyle food. We'll be getting all of our dairy from him in the future.

Raw Jersey milk...and when we get it home, that will be processed into fresh cream butter, heavy cream, creme fraiche, mozzarella, cottage cheese, sour cream, you get the picture. The way it works is...we'll buy into his herd, as in, a herdshare program. Yeah you read that right...we'll be cow owners by proxy! Oh and...i've started a much larger garden this year.

How much more am i gonna be paying for this? Glad you asked. I've done a cost analysis for the last quarter of our buying habits at our local dairy store (where we get more than just dairy by the way). Even with fuel cost, we'll STILL be $32/month LESS than what we've been spending...for a higher quality product. Not just better tasting, but infinitely better for us from a nutritional standpoint.

So eatin' at the Roundtable will be much better than just good vittles. Honestly, i can't wait to start cookin with REAL creme fraiche, and REAL heavy cream...my mouth just waters thinkin about it.


Guess i'm gettin back to my roots. Which segues nicely into this...
Being a self-proclaimed foodie, i've eaten in some nice restuarants, and i've eaten in some spoons, and honestly, for the most part, i've had better food and much better time in the spoons. There is a time quickly coming in my life when i'm gonna hafta deal with these types of folks on a much more personal level much more frequently...and when they start crawlin under my skin, i'll just remember my Hillbilly Bone...



Now y'all know you've always wanted to do somethin like that! I know i have...

Baaaaaa...

Good afternoon connoisseurs! Well, i'm still not sure just how much i like the new do...Catiche nailed it in her comment. THAT is what i've wanted to do for a couple years...but i don't know how and figuring out the HTML and actually writing it...blech. I even have the pic i want to use...its just that whole "computerese" i don't want to deal with.

So, here's the question that's been burning in the bosom for a couple days.

Where was the lamb when i was growing up?

Gather in children...

I've been fixing lamb more and more of late. The Queen was hesitant, saying in her experience it was "kinda gamey". So i did it once, and folks, it was nothing less than succulent prime rib...tender, juicy, cut it with a fork, melt in your mouth carnivorous divinity.

Monday evening, being Passover (well...as celebrated), i thought it might be a bit of a practical, interactive, extended teachable moment. So we made some more lamb. Now, we are gentiles in body...and i'm completely ignorant of Jewish custom regarding Passover lamb, other than what one can read in the scriptures...entrails kinda turn me off i must admit. Not being much of a traditionalist anyway... I decided not to ENTIRELY wing it this time and actually do some consultation with Julia. She suggested brushing it with a Gigot a la Moutarde (Herbal Mustard coating for Roast Lamb). It was basically a remoulade, and folks, seriously...you could dip your dirty pinky toe in this stuff and lick it off and it'd be good.

I slathered that leg o'lamb with the remoulade and grilled it for maybe eighty minutes at 350*...luscious...seriously.

So, now that i've had it, i'm thinking...Why haven't i been doing this all along? All i can come up with is...i never had it as a kid and just never... really...thought about it, til now. Maybe it just wasn't available, maybe it was more expensive then than now, who knows...what i DO know is that we like it NOW! The Royals dig it, The Queen has completely overcome her aversion, and i now know that lamb goes WAY beyond gyro's!

Oh...yeah, in case you were interested...

1/2 C. Dijon mustard
2T soy sauce
1 clove of mashed garlic (or more)
1t gr. rosemary OR thyme
1/4 t pwdrd ginger
2T EVOO

Blend the ingredients together except for the EVOO. Which you whip that in by droplets to make a mayonnaise-like cream. Brush that over your lamb and let it set for a few hours before roasting, or grilling like i did.

Bon Vivant!

and since we're on the subject...i'll never look at that fat one the same way again...