Manjung Coconut Jelly/Joez Coconut Jelly - A Father & Son's Empire

#Disclaimer : Beware the insanity that follows ..... everything's completely fictional, and Motormouth has NOT gone bonkers. Take it with a pinch of salt. Right until the very end. #

“After too many Slippery Nipples the night before, I woke up with a massive hangover and was extremely late for an important meeting. In my haste, I found myself clad in nothing but a pair of daisy-print boxers in front of a board of CEOs.”

Da Much Feared, Much Worshipped Board of CEO's ... Coconut jElly of Orgasmic proportion.

Cumming Coming to da office at an EXTREMELY late hour had me shaken (not stirred) in my boots, pants and all. Moreso when facin' the almighty, "sacred lords" codenamed CEO's, all 11 of them at one go. They probably don't have nothing better to do than holding meetings day in day out, at an alarming frequency.

P/S : On a side note, that last line bears some truth in it, categorized as NON-fiction. LOL. But anyway .....

All hail Tai Kor #1

Nobody messes with the sandals-wearing, carrying TWO pair of glasses at any one time (in case sparks fly between opposing clans/tribes ... you'll never know) and the habit of scoopin'-them- brain-juices-out-of-the-skulls-into-me-mouth TAI KOR #1.

TAI KOR #1 : Ahem ahem .... ahem. Soooo yer gonna waltz in so the very late oledi, N gimme some cranky cerita about Slipper-Nipples eh? Very the daring this padawan. Ahem, I mean, young one. N very the unrespectful to the elderly, NOT me, I'm still young & hung hunk, but the other 11 CEO's on the board. I meant, table. Yer eyez cannot see that they're already fumin'/blisterin/far ....... ting MAD ah?!

Swallowing my pride, and protecting da very exclusive family jewels from overly shrivelling due to air-cond blasting at full force (ya know we Malaysians ... tarak winter, so kena buat pirated copy of the climate in office) and still clad in da daisy-print boxers. But wait, was it MY fault that I was in a boxer (with daisy da FLOWER-prints! NOT Daisy Duck prints, ok!) in the first place?

Wait, was it even MY doing?!!!!

Suddenly the clouds parted ways, the haze/mist became clear, truth prevailed ... yadda yadda. I was drugged! Not by any means of the opiate kind, mind you. It's a Slippery Nipples of da most intoxicating kind !!!! (cue : OooooHHHHH ..... with dat suspenseful-revelations tone)

It was Mr Mathy all along!

Just look at the hundreds and thousands of coconuts stacked in the fridge, awaiting to be transformed into the gang of ze EVIL CEO's !!!! Masquerading themselves at night as Slippery Nipples (no Sambuca, no Irish Cream for sure!), the milky, whitish (don't get naughty ideas) shades of the inner walls of the coconuts, resembling da most delicious drink in da world named colostrum-fuelled mother's breast milk.

But wait, I remembered some substance. Some springy, jelly-like (again, DON'T be getting farny farny idea, I tell u), smooth materials that glided down my throat. Tasted like refreshing coconut water, without much enhancers (no sugar, no salt, no pepper (duh) and no artificial flavouring/colouring/preservatives!)

Wait, Mr Mathy's Manjung Jelly notwithstanding, he actually got a partner-in-crime!!!! His very own loyal & filial SON from Joez Coconut Jelly!

Oh dear. Not once was I tricked devilishly by the coconut jelly empire. The father (not Darth, but Mathy) had me enticed, intoxicated and lulled into several big coconut jellies in Manjung in Perak. But in Penang, the son named Joel @ Joe (alter egos are omnipresent on ze face of ze earth!) knew that I was as easy as pie to be duped/tricked/drunk on da coconut jellies !!!

Then my mind suddenly rewind itself back to that fateful afternoon ...... ze violent chopping/slashing motion got me hypnotized/terrified/terrorized all at the same time!

Aiyo, I tell u, the coconut jellies from both places (Manjung Jelly's the original supplier hence deemed as ze MAIN culprit) were equally intoxicating! Even of higher addictiveness than a 70% bottle of alcohol/ethanol!! Wait ... that doesn't sound right .....

Especially when our dearest old country's in a heated turmoil now, what's more with fingers pointing up,down,left,right and people dying for NO reason (and supposedly.... horrifyingly ..... no foul play. Ahem).

A refreshing, RM3 (in Manjung)/RM3.50 (in Penang) 'biji' of Coconut Jelly is all we need, to forget the material world for one second, and relish in our existence in this world! YAY !!!! Embrace the Coconut Jelly, People !!!!

See the transaction above?! They're EVILS! and the Tag line !! No wonder I was duped. Me being IQ of less than 40 and all ........ very tricky people these ones.

Wait, so that was how I got drunk the other night, from a severe case of coconut jelly-overdose. A rare disease this one, even House nor Grey's Anatomy people (wait, the latter only were good at screwing around .....) could never decipher a clinical findings as obscure as mine.

To even reach the extent of terrorizing-ly hypnotized yours truly to unwillingly wear a pair of shame-shame daisy-print boxers all the way to work, all the while polluting the horny minds of ze little people on the streets along the way.

Refreshing, cooling and addictive. Call now to be enticed .....

The above story was no thanks all thanks to Bangsar-Babe for passing around the torch. Or tag, originating from Thamby .... oops, Lemongrass herself. =P

The Coconut Jelly are branded under the banner of Manjung Jelly, all thanks to the innovative/creative/entrepreneurial ideas of a humble Mr Mathy. This brilliant idea of his came to fruition about 2 years ago, and still is a project under the watchful eyes of FAMA.

He's not sitting at home shaking his legs though. NO sirree .... He's perpetually on the run, even sending/exporting the product himself, to all over Malaysia. Currently his son, Mr. Joel @ Joe is helming a shop in Penang's Jalan Dato Keramat (the other Penang floggers have gave adequate reviews and publicity to Joez Coconut up north), and he's even exporting them over the boundaries, to Singapore.

Producing and selling off in excess of about 500-800 coconut jellies per day, he's mass-producing the delightful dessert at his shop in Manjung, which not unlike Joez Coconut in Penang, offers tables and seats for those wanting to savour their jellies or coconut drinks there and then.

If you're wondering, what's the BIG fuss about some simple coconut jelly that even the average layman can make? You're wrong. Note that the jelly is not formed outside of the shell. But instead, the jelly is 'injected' INTO the coconut which is still intact, using a specific method utilizing machineries. Then under the extreme low temperature, the jelly is formed WITH the coconut water inside of the young coconut. Almost like a science tutorial, eh? :)

Location : MAE Tendernut Jelly aka Manjung Jelly @ 45, Persiaran PM 2/3, Pusat Bandar Seksyen 2, 32040 Seri Manjung, Perak. Opens daily from 9am til 7pm. Tel No : 605-688 5654 or 6019-416 6603 (Mathy)

Location : Joez Enterprise aka Joez Coconut @ 201, Jalan Dato Kramat, 10150 Pulau Pinang. H/P No : 6016-440 9049. E-mail : joezcoco@yahoo.com.

## Now for ze most evil deed ever known to mankind (in the blogosphere, at least) ... I'm passing this tag to ... Unkaleong! Yeahlah, I know you're BUSY and all, but nah ... too bad! ##

" As Thorny spoke to the Stinky, let's fight to da finish, and see who in ze end, got da Sloppy! Wrestle we will, dropkick/elbowdrop and all, spells we shall cast upon all who stand in our ways ..... but me wanna see da BEST man WINS! "

Fullpann Steak House @ Seri Manjung, Perak

Question : Where would YOU go for a romantic/decent/fine-dining/pricey meal in Seri Manjung? Let's say, for Valentine's, birthday celebration, Parents' Day, or even company lunch/dinner where you know bingeing on Sitiawan cendol or Hock Chew cuisine or Nasi Ayam just wouldn't cut it? (Even more so for the last reason, when the bill's on your BOSS or company!! Hahaha ... but let's not digress here. Ahem).

Soft, yellow-hued lighting rendered the dinner experience with a touch of class. Bad for photography though.

Answer : Fullpann Steak House is a potentially suitable choice; the divine light comes a-shinin', when ideas are running low, and you know you wanna splurge on a memorable dinner, with steaks, chops, wine and all. (Sans the candles, but the soft neon glow may do just as well)

Only a handful of shots of the surroundings, as we were rushing like mad.

This dinner was a somewhat last minute decision. And with only about an hour and half to spare, we had to travel all the way from Teluk Batik to Manjung for a meal, and then rushed back and refreshed ourselves. The additional (yet ironic) barrier came in the form of TRAFFIC JAM (yup, this devil's everywhere!) along the road leading to the naval base (TLDM). And then to pour salt into our dejected, maggoty wounds (grumbling stomach aside, we were fatigued from the day's ordeal), a whole entourage of media was dominating at the very last traffic lights, blocking traffic flow to a screeching halt. Their purpose? That infamous Jom Heboh campaign at Teluk Batik. Uh-huh.

Japanese Chicken Chop @ RM14.50

But we're no mere pushovers, no sirree! We persevered, drumming tummies aboard a bullet train-speed Vios, and reached in the nick of time. About less than an hour for a meal at Fullpann. Impressive driving skills aside (hehe, not mine), the restaurant was thankfully inviting from the outlook, warm from the service rendered, and food arrived in a matter of minutes. OK, about 15 of them, but I ain't complaining!

KYT's Japanese Chicken Chop arrived first on our table, two deboned fillet of chicken cooked with a slightly sweet, more to savoury type of gravy, resembling Teriyaki sauce. It's a giveaway for sure, from the 'Japanese' moniker given to the dish. Served atop some broiled vegetables, a baked potato, and a buttered bun, the dish may not be mind-blowing, but yet delicious enough for the hungry soul. I nicked a piece, and the chicken was marinated well, and the seasonings seeped through the skin, thus the meat was not of the usual bland, frozen horror.

Roasted Spring Chicken @ RM20.90

Spring chicken's usually a miniature-sized chick, may NOT even be enough to feed a light eater with waistline of 25" and below. But at Fullpann, their spring chicken could almost passed off as a REAL, true blue one, even Fire Optics was havin trouble finishing his portion. And as expected, I stole a bite, but found the gravy to be a little too peppery, probably from heavy lashings of black pepper.

Braised Lamb Shank @ RM25.90

Memories of Secret Recipe's PREVIOUSLY impressive lamb shank still plays vividly in my mind now and then. Back then, a serving was priced at less than RM20. Now? The price jumped to about RM30, and the quality's sorely dropping.

Fullpann seems to take pride in their steaks, and lamb. The recommended lamb shank was surprisingly not served in a bowl (stew-like), but served on a plate, with some sides such as corn on cob, bun and greens. The gamey flavour's evident, but that's exactly how I like my lamb, with strong, pungent taste and meat falling off the bone. The thick, flavoursome gravy went really well with the shank, and I polished off the portion (trust me, the REAL serving was way bigger than it looks in the pic above) myself without hassle.

Spiralling, convulating, twisted lives we have. Share them over a dinner with some friends?

Though the setting may appear to be intimidating, fret not you'll need to pay an arm and a leg for a decent meal here. In fact, most items are priced below RM20, and they even offer set lunches at RM12 daily. (Refer to their site @ http://fullpann.googlepages.com/home). Will I return for another meal? You bet, especially with such blistering heatwave being rampant, I'll be willing to fork out a bit more for air-conditioning, and a relaxing meal. =P

Fullpann Steak House @ 34-35-36 G/Floor, Persiaran PM2/3, Pusat Bandar Seksyen 2, 32040 Seri Manjung, Perak. Tel No : 605-688 1700. Opens 7 days a week, from 12pm til 12am. Here's their MAP.

Sitiawan Cendol, Nasi Ayam Mama @ Seri Manjung & I Discovered Teluk Batik !!!

Realize it's been some time since I've posted anything from the outskirts of Ipoh, as well as outings to other towns in Perak. Since Chinese New Year in fact, and the Hanoi trip, my momentum was somewhat lost. Crawling out of bed and going to work sounds tedious and spells boredom on most days, while driving to obscure destinations for work does not seem as tempting like those good old days anymore ....

Where's the Zest in my Life ?!!!

MMMM .... yummy condiments from the roadside for that extra 'kick' !!!

Since I'm reeling from my 3 hours train ride today, I'll probably breeze through today's post. Not that the ride was horrible, mind you. In fact it was a rather commendable effort for KTM to regain the trust and its lustre, after such a looooooooooooooong hiatus from commuting between Ipoh and Kuala Lumpur. 3 hours exactly, from KL Sentral to Ipoh's station, departing and arriving right on time! From a lowly RM10 per ride (economy seats), you can be assured of a pleasant and safe ride. OK, at least in comparison to buses, you don't see trains derailing as often, do you? :) (For more information, do visit KTM's website here : http://www.ktmb.com.my)

Sitiawan's very own, Kampuan (sp?) Noodles ..... dry or wet, with curry, wantan (dumplings), pork ribs, fishball, etc. The choice is yours. But the compulsory dash of Kampung Koh's Garlic Chilli sauce is inevitable.

This journey takes precedence over my Hanoi posts, for a simple but obvious reason. To squeeze dry my brain juices in order to recollect the Halong Bay journey may take a lifetime, given the fact that I'm rather drained for the time being. Soon, OK?

Last week, work took us to Sitiawan, and Seri Manjung, both towns next to each other, located at the western coast of Perak. If you've been to Lumut (where the jetty's at before departing to Pulau Pangkor), you would've passed by these towns somehow, unknowingly. The Lumut Highway is a wonderful path to discover smaller and some off-the-(tourists)-track destinations in Perak. From Parit, Pusing and Tronoh, to Seri Iskandar, Beruas, Pantai Remis, and of course, Ayer Tawar, Sitiawan and Seri Manjung. The highway (wonder if that's what it's called, officially) does NOT collect toll fees, fret not. And with two lanes on each side, with 90km speed limit, and 60km at certain areas.

The famous item in Kampung Koh, Sitiawan is Loh Mee - A special noodle dish with wet, thick and sticky gravy

This corner shop at the Kampung Koh crossroad traffic lights attracted our attention, while we were busy searching high and low for breakfast. The place was packed with locals and out-of-towners alike (it's rather easy to spot them, as we're considered outsiders here as well!).

The famous Loh Mee in Kampung Koh is supposedly located near to the wet market, but we had no idea where the market is. And after countless rounds in Seri Manjung in search of a proper breakfast joint, we instinctively jumped at the opportunity of joining the crowd that morning.

Look for this corner shop, at Kampung Koh, Sitiawan

You can point to what others are having, in case you're at lost on what to order. The Loh Mee was sadly out-of-stock by the time we went, hence we ordered a Dry and a Wet version of their famous homemade noodles.

Resembling the texture of Hakka noodles, the springy, flat noodles was thankfully devoid of alkaline taste (from lye water being used), and complemented well by slices of tender pork ribs, and fried shallots. The noodle on itself was rather tasteless, but that's when the condiments come into play. Kampung Koh's original chilli sauce (Koki brand) and vinegar with garlic (in a jar) did the job well, lending a sour/spicy note to the noodles and meat.

Location : Sin Ek Sek @ Main Road, Kampung Koh, 32000 Sitiawan, Perak. Sorry no MAP, but coming from Sitiawan town towards Kampung Koh, you'll see this shop on your left, at the traffic lights.

JAMES CENDOL - Now helmed by the wife instead .....

So what's next after breakfast? Thirsty? Suffocating from the sweltering heat? No sweat. Look for the famous Sitiawan cendol, situated in front of the Indian temple, within walking distance from The Store in Sitiawan on Jalan Lumut.

The Indian temple (Maha Mariamman), closed to the public on that afternoon

At RM1.30 per bowl, you get a substantial bowl of green pea flour strips (Cendol), and red beans dunked in shaved ice (using the ORIGINAL shaving machine!) and Gula Melaka

The difference lies in the preparation of the cendol. And the presentation of the proprietor, or rather, the wife of the owner. The owner is seemingly operating at another location, while this original location is being manned by the wife, complete with the signature RED bowtie. Yup, remember the RED bowtie, not BLACK. There's a flattering imitation a stone's throw away.

As I mentioned, the preparation of a bowl of their famous cendol requires much sweat, though no tears. The classic ice-shaving machine probably has history dating back to my grandfather's generation, and you can witness her pumping muscles ... I mean, vigorously rotating the handle to generate shaved ice bits for the cendol. Not as smooth as those Ais Kacang, but you can bite on those crunchy tiny bits of ice, in addition to the soft strands of Cendol, and large red beans. Though I'm still giving my vote to the Penang Road's version, James Cendol deserves an honorable mention in my books.

Location : James Cendol @ Jalan Lumut, 32000 Sitiawan. In front of the Maha Mariamman Temple, near to The Store. Opens daily from 11.30 am onwards, until the day's supply finishes, or until about 7pm.

When even royalty beckons .... you know it's gotta be good

Of course, after breakfast, and erm, a simple cendol-refresher, we had to finish our duty for the day, before feeding our lunch cravings.

How to burn calories, you asked?

Teluk Batik beach ..... about 10 minutes away from Sitiawan

Surprisingly, it was my virginal visit to Teluk Batik. Where? Haha ... Least I'm not alone. Teluk Batik is a beach getaway on the western coast of Perak, about 5 minutes drive from Lumut, and accessible by car, with ample parking space, and a few resorts for travellers.

It's midday, yet the place was crowded .... school holidays = hot period, apparently ....

The beach is lined with various stalls, selling food & beverages, as well as clothes, accessories and souvenirs. A tourist destination but overshadowed by Pulau Pangkor, indefinitely, Teluk Batik has been attracting a steady stream of tourists (majority the locals, from what I witnessed that afternoon), and even had a facelift of sorts, now with a Waterfront square, just like Lumut.

Even a Sea Shells Museum?!

The seemingly abandoned museum .... One wonders who admire, erm, sea shells?



The waterfront square facing the sea

Obviously, people stare when you're all decked in shirts and suits, with slacks and leather shoes, all the while prancing and camwhoring by the sea, under the scorching heat. Ahem, but nobody recognizes us ma ...so no uneasiness at all. Thick-skinned eh? :)

You can visit http://www.malaysiavacationguide.com/telukbatik.html for information on the beach, as well as contacts for various hotels/resorts around the area.

Here's a MAP, so you can have a rough idea where this place is. "Teluk" means bay in Malay language, probably stemming from the inward curving bay this beach is located. Though far from pristine waters ..... or golden sands, at least you don't need to travel far for a simple yet relaxing holidays.

No, you're not seeing double. They've 'expanded' across the lane!

And to cap things off, we went for a late lunch (we DID work, after all) at Nasi Ayam Mama in Seri Manjung. A very, very popular HALAL restaurant in Seri Manjung, you'll be stumped at the sheer amount of people having lunch here during peak hours.

The interior is very clean, bright and airy

Recommended by Malay colleagues as well as other races, their specialty needs no intepretation. Or you can't understand what Nasi Ayam means? It means Chicken Rice, in Malay.

Very Chinese-oriented, except the chicken, served with a dark, thick and sweetish gravy (RM4 per plate)

The Chicken Rice here is GOOD. I seldom throw praises on Malay-style Chicken Rice, as most failed in the chicken department (tough, not tender, salty, or plain tasteless) or the rice department (soggy, too artificially yellow, too hard, or overpowering margarine taste). But pleasantly surprised by Nasi Ayam Mama's quality, the rice being fragrant and fluffy, resembling Hainanese chicken rice, while the roast chicken was flavoursome, with or without the gravy. The dipping sauces were right on as well, the chilli sauce being a little sweetish, and the bird's eye chillies in thick soy sauce was perfect to perk things up. The soup was a little too peppery for my taste, but Mr Z (my colleague) enjoyed it nonetheless.

FYI, they serve other dishes as well, rice and noodles alike.

Location : Nasi Ayam Mama @ 63-65, Persiaran Manjung 3/2, Taman Manjung Point Seksyen 3, 32040 Seri Manjung, Perak.

With that .... we departed back to Ipoh ; Hunger pangs Satiated, Sleepy yet Satisfied .....