I've been trying to get the Red Sox to show movies at Fenway on summer nights while the team is away for years. Search my blog for "Monster Movies" and see all the posts I've done about it, starting in April 2005. Of course, as that search term implies, my specific idea is to project the movies on the Green Monster. They're not doing that, but later this month, they WILL be showing a movie at Fenway, up on the big board. I've told them about my idea in team surveys over the last few years, so I guess it finally got through. Or they just thought of it on their own. Or they got the idea from me AND will soon be sending me a full-season ticket package free of charge and scores of game-used Gedman jerseys as a thank you. I'll keep watching my mailbox.

Anyway, the movie they're showing is The Sandlot, and fans will sit in the seats behind home and first. (Not on the outfield grass as my much, much better idea proposes.) What's up with this Sandlot movie? I noticed on one of NESN's text surveys that it was actually beating Major League and Bull Durham and Field of Dreams and The Natural as best baseball movie of all time. Does this show that the audience is very young? Or just that only the young are voting, and those dumbasses think some kids' movie is better than the classics. Or was it just rigged to get people buzzing about Sandlot before they show it? Or was that actually a vote to see which movie gets played at Fenway and I missed that part of it?

With all this movie talk, I've been thinking:

Why don't they show movies on the Green Monster?

They could have movie nights after games. Anybody who wants to stay for a movie could filter into the seats behind the first base dugout (because you know they ain't lettin' anybody onto the field; but in a perfect world, everybody would sit out on the grass). After a half hour or so, they could turn off the main lights and just project The Lost Boys or whatever onto the Monster. The price would be, let's say, free, because with the money we're all spending, they need to give out more free stuff. They'd get two more hours worth of concession sales, anyway.

Speaking of free stuff, I think this year's rule should be: Every paying customer at every game in 2005 gets some kind of 2004 Champs memoribilia. And the promotions department should know that each and every one of us already has something to put our keys on. Okay, I've gone too far. I'm perfectly happy with what this management has done already. Just makin' suggestions.

But back to the movie idea: Has this ever been done before? I think I'm gonna write to the team on the this one. If you'd like to help get "Monster Movie Mania" going, write to them as well, and give them the link to this post.

And from
Joy Of Sox, check this out.

Interesting question from a season ticket holder survey I got from the Red Sox yesterday:


How would you rate your level of interest in the following programs? Please respond using a 1-5 scale, with 5 being "extremely interested" and 1 being "not at all interested."

Loaded tickets, where you can add cash value for the purchase of concessions and merchandise to tickets for a specific game

Stored value cards, which would act as a pre-paid gift card that you could add value to throughout the season

Red Sox rewards/loyalty program, which would provide discounts and special offers based on frequency of ticket, merchandise, and concession purchases

Digital or electronic ticketing, which would replace paper and would be easily transferred via the internet (email) or mobile devices (cell phones, PDA’s, iPhones)


I was "extremely interested" in #3! (I got the survey because of my 10-game plan. Sometimes I get treated like a "season ticket holder," but not always. Example: I don't get those 10 games at the STH discount price. But I brought that up in this survey! I also told them about my Monster Movies idea--to show movies on the Green Monster and let us sit in the outfield on summer weekend nights when the team's away. Who's with me??)

Two of my latest ideas, and one classic in case Red Sox management is reading.

1. Bowl Lick. I guess it's just cake/cookie batter in little cups, like the way they make yogurt. Lick the bowl any time!

2. A root beer scented soap called Royal Rooter. (This one's for Kim--I think she just may do it.)

3. Monster Movies. Red Sox front office--you need to make this happen. Everybody sits on blankets in the outfield on a summer night watching movies projected onto the Green Monster.

Oh, and check out this Nardwuar interview with the San Diego Chicken. I'm a huge Nardwuar fan, so I was psyched to find this. It's funny how you almost can't tell them apart. Nardwuar found his Poul-mate, I think.

Good luck getting tickets today. As of this writing, the Ts are up on April/May, and Sox Pax, so you can get a head start if you know what you're doing. [Update, 1:37 a.m.: The September games are now showing the 1/26 date. We'll see if they change that tomorrow or if they've made the call to hold off on them till the big sale this year. Also, the game times are up. Still the usual 1:35/7:10 times for us, except, for some reason, one week in April, with three 6:30 games and a 4:05.]

Friday night I went to the free "Holiday Bash" at Fenway Park. First, here's a video of what I ended up bringing home, then it's on with the story.



I decided to park far away for some reason. If I'd known it was gonna be this cold, I wouldn't have. After a 25-minute walk with my hood up, I arrived at Gate B at 4:30 and was maybe 40 people from the front of the line.

At 5:00, they opened the gates, I got inside, and I half-pretended like I was just "soaking in the festive atmosphere" when really I was trying to find the Yard Sale, and hoping not too many others had beaten me to it. They had it in this big room underneath the Royal Rooters Club behind the Big Concourse. People were already digging through the jersey boxes. And it was no coincidence that the first people to get there were the types to go through EVERY jersey. I was nervous: do I wait for them, or try to squeeze in, and if so, am I missing being first at some other area with possibly new and better stuff? I walked into a side room of photos and banners and way fewer bricks than usual. (Bricks were $10--I already have enough to build my own Fenway, and last year they were $5 anyway, so I moved on.) I was blowing it, finding nothing, knowing I'm wasting valuable time at this early hour. Then I went to the bats. I heard a guy say "Marty Barrett." Interesting. The Barrett cost $75. I was kind of thinking $50 was my limit, which was part of the reason I was now focusing on bats instead of jerseys, which were $65 and up. Suddenly, Gedman. Two of Rich's bats, both cracked. $50 each. I figured there were two so I could always go back. I kept looking. A Jody Reed. A Marc Sullivan. A broken bat with a "7" that could be Trot's. A Scutaro model with the name suspiciously scraped off, as if someone was trying to hide it from the feds. Some Joey Gathrights and Bill Halls. And who is Brad Hewitt? Finally it hit me that I needed to of course grab a Gedman. I chose one, and then later grabbed a bat handle with 22 on the knob ($10), and noticed a barrel with Ryan Kalish's name on it and no tag. Hopefully they'd let me keep both for a ten-spot. I went back to the banner room and found the one that's explained in the above video. Had to grab it for $10 even though they're usually a lot more.
As I waited in line to buy, as carolers sang, I wondered why in the world I hadn't grabbed any of these team-signed big cardboard things for ONE dollar. The person ahead of me had several. I dropped the ball there. When I got to the cashier, she really thought the banner would be way more than the $10 I said I saw on there. She thought hundreds. She called across to somebody who yelled "fifty." But I kept standing there as she searched the thing, now with the guy looking on. He found the $10 price tag, and said, "ten." (I swear I didn't just slap it on there! But you know some assholes do that. And then sell the stuff.)
Then I asked about my bat pieces, and again the man was called over, and again agreed I only had to pay ten. Now I was carrying two bats worth of lumber, a gigantic balled-up banner, another free bag thing, and my camera. But the work was done. Now it was time to take some pics and see what else was going on.

In the Big Concourse was the "Enchanted Village." I almost got run over by a slow-moving train! Basically, this whole thing is a way for anyone to experience what goes on at Christmas at Fenway without the ticket-buying.

I then realized the Rooters Club itself was open so I headed up there. Mics were set up for radio interviews the next day at X@F.

Terribly, this is the best shot I got of Lavarnway and Farrell who were taking pics with fans. They just finished up as I got there, and Farrell was being whisked away. A guy asked for an autograph, and he apologetically said how he's got "explicit instructions" to get the hell outta there. I know you're on a tight schedule here, Johnny, but sign! It's fucking Christmas!

Former Sox catcher and announcer Bob Montgomery and Autograph Alley mainstay Dick Berardino.

Larry Lucchino signing. I also saw Wally, but did not come across Santa Claus.

Okay, back downstairs for more Big Concourse decorations. The positioning of this shot makes it look like that wreath is tiny and attached to the pole, when it's actually gigantic and hanging much farther back.

The tree.

Big League Brian was all Nutcrackered out.

They let people out into the seats for a laser light show on the Monster. (Sounds like my perennial Monster Movies idea! Almost...) I didn't see the show, but I ran into Kelly O'Connor of sittingstill fame, and she said it wasn't any more exciting than any non-Pedroia laser show. Which is to say not that exciting after the first 30 seconds.

But it was cool to see Fenway in the dark.

Was hard to get a pic of what was on the board without zooming.

Semi-zoomed out.

And we got to go in the clubhouse! After 35 years of totally never seeing the behind-the-scenes areas, I'm suddenly a regular. Thanks again to current ownership.

Somebody was having a pizza party in there.

The empty "VOMITorium."

They had actually sealed off this area from the cold and put this big heat-blower in. That was really nice, what with the cold-ass coldness I mentioned earlier.

Had to take one last check out at the field on my way out.

Good-bye until April, Fenway Park. Now I had another long walk, not only with the cold to deal with, but all the stuff I was schlepping around. Suddenly I'm walking past fancy restaurants in Brookline, in the dark, with a hood on, carrying a baseball bat. In November. There wasn't a lot of eye contact, let me tell you. At one point I tried to get a better grip on the Gedman bat by flipping it up and catching it since the other hand was full, and I snagged the broken part. But I was too cold to bleed! I just had a gash that eventually turned red. I finally unloaded the precious cargo at my car, and as I walked to Anna's Taqueria, I realized I was now a normal person again. Washing the wound in their bathroom cost me about 7 spots in line, but I was just happy to be somewhere warm. Mr. Brownstone greeted me on the radio as I headed back to Providence. Yow-za!

And now for the haul!
The Gedman bat. Nice wear, and of course the crack.

Look at the hollowed end.

The Kalish barrel. Love that logo. I looked closely at this bat and saw stitch marks, including the low ones that cost this bat its life.

Finally, the handle, which for some reason I assumed was Bill Hall's. But there have been several #22s lately. And then I noticed it had a hologram! I looked up the number at mlb.com, and here's what popped up:

Session Product Description: GAME USED BROKEN BAT
Session Name: BALTIMORE ORIOLES?@?BOSTON RED SOX
Session Date: August 13, 2006
Autographer:
Authenticator: AUTHENTICATORS, INC.
Additional Information: WILY MO PENA HANDLE

Hahahahahahahahahaha. Awesome.

Yes. I just bought tickets to the Futures at Fenway doubleheader this summer, which will feature a Lowell game and a PawSox game. I realized today that I'd watch any teams if it meant sitting in sweet seats at Fenway at a discounted price. In fact, they could show movies on the Green Monster (an idea I've suggested before), and I'd pay to get in.

So I grabbed a bunch of seats right behind the visitor's on-deck circle for 20 bucks each. You can actually get up to eight tickets, and they range from 5 bucks to 30 for front row Monster or the new pavillion boxes. Both of which would have been cool, but I didn't want to miss a chance to sit so close to the field, and for 10 bucks less. Now watch all my friends will say "I would've gone if you got Monster seats."

The reason I got this chance is because I'm a 10-Game Plan holder. Which, in this case, makes me a season ticket holder. I'm not always included in this elite bunch. When it comes to free parking for season ticket holders, I'm the average Joe/Josephine. For, I'm "one of them."

I was pysched when I got the letter in the (actual) mail yesterday. And I'd like to offer this public service to any season ticket/10-Game Plan holders who didn't check their mail yesterday, or who's mail carrier is slow or whatever: Click on the link for the Futures game at redsox.com. Your password is "BRS" followed by your season ticket account number. Your password is your zip code. This will work if you've got a 10-gamer. Maybe it's different for "real" season ticket holders, I don't know. But, I just thought since I got the letter yesterday, and the special time to buy was today at noon, maybe I should give people a heads-up.

Also, ARSFIPT Ultimate Chan Pack members may remember I had tickets to a Colbert Report taping a while ago, which got messed up due to Brian's car being towed, and then we got shut out anyway because so many people showed up. Tonight is the "make-up" night. We were given "VIP" tickets since we got screwed the last time. Colbert rarely shows the crowd, but occasionally he'll high five the front row on his way to the interview table. If he does, look for me. I'll be wearing a Bad News Bears jersey and a Sox hat. Tonight at 11:30 on Comedy Central. I hope I do get on TV, because then I can go home and watch myself, and that will negate the fact that last night I watched my shitty, loud, rude neighbor playing in the backup band of a major national artist on a major network TV-show. That's New York for ya. One night your neighbor's on TV, the next night you are. Maybe.

Before tonight's game, Remy said the Red Sox have been able to stay alive through the injuries "because of the second wild card." Maybe another case of MLB paying people to praise their new idea? Because a peek at the standings would have told Remy that we were only 4 behind the first wild card going into tonight. Now we're 3. (And 1 back of the second WC.) With 70 games left. I'm pretty sure we wouldn't have thrown in the towel under last year's rules....

10-1 Monster win for the redder of the two socks tonight. In a 1-1 tie in the third, Ellsbury and Crawford did a phrase that will make lots of game summaries. That's right, they set the proverbial table. Cody Ross came up, and...DONG. In the very next inning, Cody came up again with two on, and again hit a 3-run dong. Adrian followed with a dong of his own (all of these went over the Monster), and as Warner Wolf would say, "you could turn your sets off there, folks." The New Englanders went on to win 10-1.

Doubie rolled, giving up just a run over 6, and the pen (Albers, Melancon, Miller) gave up nothing over the final 3. Speaking of weed, I was at Cumberland Farms tonight after the game, and I had the same thought that I always have when I'm at a convenience store at night: The clerk is assuming I'm a stoner! Late-night snacks are for straight-edgers, too! I don't know if it's the sideburns or the fact that my right eye is slightly more closed than my left or what*, but for some reason people generally assume I'm a stoner anyway. Add midnight potato chip buying to the mix and I'm fuckin' Tommy Chong in a 7-Eleven cashier's eyes.

Drug people, it's cool, I'm down with you doing your thing (man)--in fact, I seem to love movies about drugs, maybe it's because knowing I'm in no danger of ever trying them, I can watch with eyes wide open, well, the left eye anyway, and just enjoy--but I hate that you've taken control of the midnight-snack industry! It's kind of like how when I refuse offers to eat peanuts, everybody assumes I'm allergic. No! I just fuckin' hate peanuts, and every other nut for that matter. Now suddenly I'm one of "those people" when I say no to nuts. I'm just a man. A man who hates nuts and loves potato chips. But no sour cream and onion, Jesus! And what the fuck are chives?

I guess the moral of the story is, the Red Sox won. We're gonna get ahead of this wild card field and then set our sights on the complacent Yankees!


*or my writing style, perhaps

I missed the very beginning of the intro to the game on NESN tonight, but I saw they were showing highlights superimposed on the Monster, as if they were movies. My idea! As well-documented on this blog. Maybe my vision of sitting at Fenway and actually watching a "Monster Movie" will come true soon. Again, Lucchino, no money needed for the idea, just season tickets, please. Thanks.

Yanks won to the struggling Blue Jays, so we need to win to stay tied for first. I'm glad to have Don and Jerry once again, as I've gotten the NESN coverage this whole series.

Huckaby, aka the anti-Jeter, makes the start at catcher. But we may have a new cacther in Javy Lopez, if the rumors are true.

Youk leads off the game with a double, and now my TV has gone black. Stein-bren-nerrrr!

Driving up to Boston I heard that Jose Iglesias was called up and would be wearing #68 for the Red Sox. I knew he probably wouldn't see any game action, but as the team took the field for the ninth, there he was--to the surprise and delight of Dustin Pedroia! (Click pics to enlarge, he told the Internet in 2011.) But now back to the beginning....

11:40ish a.m. No batting practice at all, for my second straight game. Gray and cold, also for my second straight game. But I was really taking this picture because they were testing colors on that left scoreboard. Here's purple...

...and here's yellow. And I can assure you, I took a picture for each color, but I'll leave it at those two.

Some guy had a Pat O'Brien's shirt! The Red Sox bar right near where I used to live in NYC. (Update: They did finish painting that Red Sox logo on their window--and terribly, it's the non-updated one.)

Just walkin' around, stuck between the bases, checkin' out the fog....

Finally I decided I'd try for pics of Iglesias, so I went to the far edge of the dugout. In front of me was this swivel for a camera they no longer use. (I assume.)

Artsy NESN microphone shot. Artsy meaning "close-up" I guess.

Wheeler was signing for a while. People can be so rude--as soon as a guy starts signing, they just start throwing shit at him. Fortunately one security guard is in charge of repeatedly yelling "one at a time" at people.

Kid doing the lineups for NESN. ("Rico...ka ch ch Baldy.") Yes, it says "Mr." on the "cue cards."

With this new gates opening system, a lot of people don't get to work until after we're in the park. I noticed the standings weren't updated, so I kept my eye on it so I could see us move out of last place. Here they are mid-change.

We're out of the cellar, ready to be moved up.

And...done.

Dice-K, who would get the W despite a rough start today.

Tito in the dugout.

Tito did some autographing too. When one kid chucked a ball that nearly konked him in the noggin, he yelled "hey" at the kid. Once he got his attention, he just laughed and said a sarcastic "thanks," and kept signing. Nice job not losing his cool. I woulda just ducked back inside at that point.

Tito laughing near his special bench. I'll give you one guess as to which player he was goofing around with non-stop. Hint: Your guess should be Pedroia.

And there's Jose! The first known picture of Jose Iglesias in uniform as a Red Sox at Fenway Park. Actually, I have an earlier one but then I zoomed in a little more to get this one.

Jose Iglesias again.

Everybody had their various pink items on for Mother's Day. I didn't bring my mom to this game, but only because she's 2500 miles away right now.

More Jose action.

Dustin Pedroia. Wiping his nose.

Doesn't Adrian Gonzalez look like Dwight Evans circa '82 here?

Here comes Wally with "Momma Monster."

Youk and Pedroia out on the field.

Happy Mother's Day, from a bunting Dustin Pedroia.

Youk with the pink.

My new hobby is getting shots of Pedroia with mascots in them.

Youk about to hand Wally's mom a rose. My video of the moment is here.

Crawford with pink bat.

Pedroia making a face after the national anthem. At this point I finally left the dugout area. I had a seat under the CF board, so I just hung around in stading room all day.

Here's Papi up with a pinky. Today was a crappy weather day. The wind was blowing the wrong direction. So the "warm spot" (the third base deck) was actually cold. Down on the field in the sun I'm sure it was fine. But we poor people had a rough day.

Adrian Gonzalez with a Gong over the Monster.

Around the 8th, I got a good spot in front of the section 16/17 pole. Got a shot of the scoreboard guy peeking out.

Gonzalez and Youk.

Mr. Morneau and lil' Dusty.

And that's when Iglesias came out. Wow, it's like One Hour Photo. (Or any other of the scores of movies where it starts at the end and then goes back and then, ya know....)

This is the moment after the first pitch of the Jose Iglesias major league era has been thrown.

Close-up of Jose.

He had three (or so, up to infinity, but it turned out to be three) chances to be involved in a play. And with two outs, there was a grounder to short! He threw the guy out (ball in air in the above shot) to end the game.

Before I headed for the runway, I got a shot of the team celebrating, and there's Jose, probably wondering if he's doing the post-game lineup correctly.

Then I met Kim (second straight Sunday we did different things in Boston that ended at the same time) for dinner, my first time at Grasshopper in Allston. I got the coconut curry with fake chicken. It was good. I told Kim they should do fake dog, fake anything--hey, as long as it's just seitan, who cares what you call it, right? She did not agree, and asked, What if someone piled a big pile of horse meat on your plate, and I answered, You could cut the seitan into the shape of an actual horse, and I'd eat it. I don't eat meat, but I'll eat a fake version of any meat. Ooh! I should open a vegetarian cannibal restaurant! "You won't know the difference!"

Oh and I found the Jamba Juice. Thwarted in my earlier attempt, I asked a different woman at the pizza counter, and she pointed me over to where the lime rickeys are sold. I went over (knowing I'd checked that obvious spot before) and looked at the menu, and it wasn't there. I walked up to the woman there, and as I was asking about Jamba, I saw a sign behind her on the wall. "Jamba Juice $6.75." It's got the logo and everything. But if you're just looking at the menu, you'd never see it. Anyway, I didn't shell out for it. I don't remember how much they cost in NYC--then again, I would always buy them on Chan's gift card that I got him for Christmas or something. (That's a sneaky way to get something you want--buy it for a friend, then get it from them. No guilt--YOU paid for it! Well, okay, guilt.)