Let's Flamin-GO!

Where do card ideas come from? EVERYWHERE!  In this case, a friend sent me a Star Trek meme (see below) that I realized would make a very fast and easy card featuring an Eyelet Outlet Flamingo Brad, a Sandcastle, Tall Palm and our Sun and Cloud Brads with an accent of Sequins and a mat of Pink and White Dot Tape: 

The sentiment is formatted in a font called In Your Face Joffrey, which was free at DaFont.com; all I had to do was print it out, add brads and embellies et voila!

Whatever joke, quote, saying or motto YOU would like to re-create in card form, I'm pretty confident that the Eyelet Outlet Online Store has all the Brads and Washi you'll need to make it work!

happy ITLAPD, me hearties!!!

international talk like a pirate day, that is. this is actually the tenth OFFICIAL anniversary of my favorite spurious holiday, thus we should celebrate all the more he-ARRR-tily, landlubbers!!! grog for EVERYONE! ok, yeah, it's ARRR-guably a bit early for that, isn't it? howsabout just a double helping of piratical lols, then?! shiver me timbers!!!

if you'd prefer a film, scallawags, may i suggest the pirates: band of misfits, produced by the estimable ARRRR-dman animation (home of wallace and gromit, as well as shaun the sheep!) and as swashbucklingly funny of a movie as i have seen in quite some time!

if you find yourself with a big decision to make today, here's a bit of help with that, just print it out and add a spinner, or tack it to the wall and fling broadswords at it until you get an answer! 

finally, what better time than ITLAPD for a bit more ARRRR-tjournaling, me ole scurvy dogs?! here be some pages i made, inspired by the most recent daily pape-ARRRR prompts:

 DPP#43: circles

i've been obsessed with circles all summer. this time i added a zillion punched circles to the background, which is covered with a green page from which circle shapes have been removed! (and yeah, a little quote from the dalai lama never did anyone any harm, either!)

 DPP#44: leaf prints

since i don't have a garden or even any non-cacti houseplants, i decided to use some artificial leaves from a decorative garland. thus, i didn't get much detail such as the veins and stems which look so verrrrry cool in tammy's example; so i filled in with the sewing machine! :)

 DPP#45: two for one

for this one we could combine ANY two of the previous daily paper prompts. i went with "random paper collage" and "zentangling". the result is WEIRD... but i like it!

 DPP#46: texture collage

i used some photos of texture and also some actually textured materials. i cannot say i am thrilled with the composition, but what can i say, it was like 11pm and i was flagging. it was fun to make, though!

 DPP#47: stamping circles

speaking of fun, go grab a couple of colors of paint, a foam brush, and a few paint-resistant circle-shaped objects! it's ok, i'll wait!!! 

...now just go a little nuts on some heavy duty paper and tell me you don't feel better! (you can't, because you WILL!)

DPP#48: doodle flower

if you don't have paints or time for the one above, g'head and do this, instead. my favorite is the zebra pattern, though the clouds are also fun.

and now back to your regularly scheduled wenches and rums, d-ARRRRRRR-lings!!! ♥♥♥

one of the silliest things i've ever made...

...is this "pug life" ATC book, full of eponymous loldog photos that have amused me over the last six months or so.

i started saving them for my friend gina, who is a big fan of dogs generally, and whose family was adopted by a pug this year. we often find the same things funny, and we're both always on the lookout for an interesting way to combine photographs and papercrafting. i sent it to her on her birthday. ok, actually, despite being ready to go well in advance, i sent it to her several weeks AFTER her birthday. because that's the way i roll!  i think this might be my favorite page of the book:

it's the punctuation: gimme. dat. hat. pug.  it's become a bit of a catchphrase around here.  i also love this one:

 i felt preeeeeeeeeeetty confident that she would not have thought to make one of these for *HERSELF*, and as it turned out, she seems to have enjoyed getting this almost as much as i loved making it!  as an extra added bonus, her sons quite like it too, so i feel pretty pleased all-round! 

do you think it's too early to start saving up lols for "VOLUME 2"??!?  :) :) :)

been there, done that!

(do i even need to tell you this comes from the divine and hilarious lego-a-day photo website?! naaaaaaaaaahhhhh, surely not. happy tuesday afternoon, darlings...from me... and the moody blues!)

BESTEST: legos

i've decided to start a new feature called "BESTEST" in which i will compile my current faves in various (mostly, i fear, silly) categories. if you think this is just an excuse to spend more time trawling google images for random stuff that makes me laugh...ok, yeah, well-spotted, you're exactly right!

i'm starting with LEGOS. i have always had a minor obsession with them, and lately i just keep running across new reasons to love 'em! i partially blame jana for this, since she pointed me towards #1!

1. best lego-photo-a-day website: lego365

"if you see a faded sign by the side of the road that says..."

it's by a guy called dan. he likes legos, and photography. he makes me choke on my first cup of coffee several days a week. but, you know...in a *GOOD* way! i'm more than halfway through the archives and wondering what i will do after that. weep, probably.

2. best lego book: i lego ny by christoph niemann. simply brilliant. brilliantly simple. quintessentially new yorky. a lot of people are getting this for xmas, i think!

3. best eddie izzard comedy routine illustrated by animated legos: this james bond one; better by far than even the most delicious pair of jam trousers! :)

4. best lego food: a tie between this lego that looks like food...and this food that looks like lego! either way, i now want to build something, and have a snack. not necessarily in that order.

5. best real-life lego experience: a trip to the san diego legoland in summer, 2007

my secret fantasy dream-job? building the exhibits in miniland!!!

i'd like to tell you we went because my friends live 10 minutes away and have a membership because their kids love it...and all of that is true...but in addition to trips to the zoo, the museums of balboa park, huntingdon library, and other cultural highlights, i specifically asked to be taken here, and had (at age 43) the most fun of the whole group!!! (& i'd LOVE to go back!)

honorable mentions: ♥♥♥ guggenheim museum lego kit, lego software, the brothers brick, nathan sawaya's life-sized lego sculptures, lego tardis ♥♥♥

happy, happy, happy

INTERNATIONAL TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY, MATEYS!!!

(arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!)

yo ho ho! ye'll be needin' a pirate name, me salty dogs!

(i'm ahead of the game with larrrrrrrren, obviously!)

if you need more help, you could take this pirate quiz.

if you get confused, me hearties, a pirate translator can be found at this U.ARRRRRR.L.

this graph provides an alarrrrrrrrrming statistic!

if ye're feeling arrrrrrrrrrtistic, why not try some pirate arrrrrrrrmigurumi?

or perhaps ye'd prefer a pirate hat?

(avec built in eye-patch, naturellement!)

it'd go nicely with this pirate (monkee) shirt!

this pirate game looks fun--(it's an ARRRRRR.P.G.!)

but beware of pirate legos!

if ye gets tired of bread and water, there's pirate cake!

(watch out for sea monsters though, ye scurvy landlubbers!)

these pirate dingbats may well have been used by long john silver himself! there's also pirate cliparrrrrrrt!

i'm sure captain hook could've used one of *THESE*!

(the "glow in the darrrrrrrrk" feature is useful, indeed!)

if you're hurt (in an arrrrrrrrrrgument?!) there are pirate bandaids.

and apparently, me old sea dogs, there's AN APP for this!!!

meet george and martha

SQUASHINGTON!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAHAhaHAhahaHAHAHAhahaHAha!!!

ok sorry.

and yes, i am out of hand with the googley eyes on foodstuffs.

(but i still find this joke...and photo...HILARIOUS!)

♥♥♥

a few updates:

• yes, madeline *LOVED* her birthday present!
• yes, my mom did actually get a bit misty when she saw the photo of the two of us on her gift bag...and then called me back sunday night to thank me again.
• lovely husband jeff is still home from work, battling his vertigo issues, but the medication is helping and the diagnosis of this being the residue of a serious ear infection from earlier in the year (as opposed to something new, big, and scary!) is looking more and more likely!
• i had a little medical...or rather dental...adventure of my own yesterday: what started as a minor toothache on saturday became a major toothache on sunday and by monday morning i was in the most pain i have EVER been in! turns out i had a serious abscess under one of my crowns and needed an emergency root canal. ...did i mention i am BIGTIME dental phobic...??!?!???! yeah. not a fun day, but i have to say that i was SERIOUSLY fortunate in being able to get first an emergency appointment with my own wonderful dentist, who got me sneaked in right away at his preferred endodontist, who could not have been nicer, kinder, or more considerate!!! so all in all i feel like a pretty lucky--albeit sore in the jaw area--bunny. couldja pass the floss, please??!?! :)

i wish this was one of *MY* cheezburgers!

(sadly, it is not.)

it does make me laugh uproariously about 90% of the time, however. the other 10% of the time, it makes me laugh rather ruefully. because some days, i am the cat...and some days, i am the goldfish! :)

whichever YOU are today...i hope you have a rather fabulous tuesday!!!

♥♥♥

lolz...i makes dem!

ever since the summer, when i see a particularly funny uncaptioned photo on i can has cheezburger or i has a hotdog i've been having a go at writing my own and submitting it, confident each time in the expectation that of course said websites will print the result.

so far, nuthin'.

i assume this is because my own captions are SO VERY FUNNY that they fear the other contestants would become disheartened.

yeah.

that's probably it! :)

anyway, having tired of waiting for my BIG BREAK in pet photo comedy, i thought i might start posting them here, as a sort of public service; and not because i have only five minutes to blog, and nothing new to show, and zero in the way of original ideas...no sirree bob...

*HAPPY FRIDAY, DARLINGS!!!*

merry christmas to all...

...and to all a good night!

UNLESS of course,

you've done *this* to a kitteh:

in which case, i'd recommend sleeping with one eye open...

...inna locked room...

...under an assumed name provided by witness protection.

to everyone else i wish

the SAFEST,

the MOST FESTIVE,

and the

HAPPIEST

OF HOLIDAYS!!!

don't worry miss kitty...

...even if cats COULD be tried for homicide, no jury in the world would convict you!!! :)

(this musical interlude brought to you by i can has cheezburger guaranteed to reduce your holiday stress by 117%...temporarily, at least!)

hey, monday!

that's all i had to say, really

glad i got that off my chest

now

LOOKOUT, TUESDAY

'cause here i come!!!!!!!!

happy wednesday, darlings!

i hope the first half of this week has brought your share of amusement and chuckles...but if not...please share one of mine:

from i has a hot dog, canine companion site to i can has cheezburger.

say it with cheezburgerz

this has been quite a challenging* week for a number of reasons, the greatest of which being that lovely husband jeff has been in harrisburg, pennsylvania since sunday. thankfully, he is scheduled to return this evening. i could write several paragraphs on why this is a truly wonderful thing, and how happy i am about it, or i could just show you THIS:

...which sums it up rather nicely, i think!

speaking of cheezburgerz...my lovely blogging friend yin sent me this cool article about the popularity of lolcats and viral internet memes generally, which you might enjoy reading. i know i did! (thanks, yin!) :)

*by which, of course, i mean "bloody buggery bastard of a"; a phrase which a wholesome & ladylike blogger like myself would politely bury in the teeny tiny print of a footnote**

**you're welcome ♥

a multi-platform approach towards the aquisition of cheezburgers

A. the direct method
(to which lovely husband jeff inclines)

B. the indirect method
(my own choice)

(images from i can has cheezburger, obviously; to which--equally obviously--i am still entirely addicted!)

happy wednesday, darlings!

ahoy be the BIG DAY!

by which i mean international talk like a pirate day obviously, me hearties!!! arrrrrrrrrr!!!!! and bein' such a glorious holiday, o'course i be commemmoratin' it in me ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRT journal:

text reads, "skull & crossbones...3 pieces of 8; parrots...12 doubloons; treasure map...lives of 1/2 the crew; being ready for international talk like a pirate day...PRICELESS!!! (arrrrr!)"

YAR!!!! so obviously the first thing to do whilst embarking upon our new pirately lives is to be a-drinkin' a bottle o'rum and a-hoistenin' up the mainsails!!! (unless we be drivin' obviously. or be havin' to go to work; just because we be pirates doesn't mean we be completely irresponsible !) (arrrr!)

after that, me scallywags, we should probably be a-takin' the official pirate personality assessment test to determine what sort...and more importantly what rank...of pirates we be, mateys! here be my results:

You are The Cap'n!
PROFILE: Some men and women are born great, some achieve greatness and some slit the throats of any scalawag who stands between them and unlimited power. You never met a man - or woman - you couldn't eviscerate. You are the definitive Man of Action, the CEO of the Seven Seas, Lee Iacocca in a blousy shirt and drawstring-fly pants. You're mission-oriented, and if anyone gets in the way, that's his problem, now isn't? Your buckle was swashed long ago and you have never been so sure of anything as your ability to bend everyone to your will. You will call anyone out and cut off his head if he shows any sign of taking you on or backing down. If one of your lieutenants shows an overly developed sense of ambition he may find more suitable accommodations in Davy Jones' locker. That is, of course, IF you notice him. You tend to be self absorbed - a weakness that may keep you from seeing enemies where they are and imagining them where they are not.

What's Yer Inner Pirate? brought to you by

The Official Talk Like A Pirate Web Site. Arrrrr!

**********

next, me old salts, we must be a-gettin' our us official pirate names!!! mine be:

~The Iron Fist~

and a mighty fine name it is too, named after me mother, i were! yarrrrrrrr!

if any of ye scurvy dawgs be a-wonderin' "WHY we are doing this?!" welllllllllll i oughttaaaaaa make ye walk the plank!!! (but there be an excellent explanation here!) (arrr!)
and finally those of us who be a-havin' humorous pirate-based personal photos and/or anecdotes should be a-sharin' of them now:

yo ho ho--this be pirate riley!

and avast, landlubbers! here be pirate lindsay!

the photos above were taken in the summer of 2006* on a day in which the nieces in question were kind enough to take me out for happy meals. the particular happy meals we obtained accompanied one of the "pirates of the caribbean" films, which of course neither of these young ladies had seen, but they loved "the wiggles" (who have a pirate character) and they have older boy cousins, and thus had a general idea of the concept. so we donned our kerchiefs and enthusiastically said things like, "YAAAAAR!" and "YO HO HO!" and called each other landlubbers and generally exhibited as much hearty pirate mise-en-scene as very small girls & a middle-aged aunt can muster; then we commenced to eating our lunch and resumed normality. or so i thought. until about ten minutes later, when miss lindsay, unprompted, and still using the gravelly-est pirate voice you can imagine a not-quite-3-year-old assaying, asked her mother to,

"please pass the ketchup......'cause i'm a PIRATE!"

because a life of plunder and pillaging upon the high seas is no excuse for bad manners!

(arrrrrrrrrrrr!)

*i only know this b/c... flying in the face of a lifetime of "winging it" ...i am smart enough to DATE every single file & cd & envelope of photos. if you had asked me about the pics above, i'd have said, vaguely (& incorrectly) that they were from last year sometime...possibly spring?? see...you THINK you're gonna remember who did what, when, and where. you're wrong. label EVERYTHING! oh yeah...and when your friends have kids, and you write their birthdays on the calendar? write THE YEAR on there. and carry it forward to each successive year. b/c if you don't, i guarantee at some point you will write "happy fifth birthday" on the (infinitely more grown up, obviously) 6 year old's card, or ask an 8 year old how he is enjoying first grade. whereupon you will be met with the stare of polite but silent loathing from said child, whose pride you have mortally wounded for all time. it may not be mentioned again...but it'll never EVER be forgotten. trust me. TRUST ME. here endeth the first lesson. (oh yeah...and ummm...arrrrr!) :)

yesterday was a bit like this:

don't get me wrong--after a week on my living room floor i am *THRILLED BEYOND MEASURE* to be back at work! but...it was a monday...and i was gone for a week... (just in terms of cleaning issues this is too long) ...and we are in the midst of several transitions...and
...did i mention it was *monday*??!

having said all that, i am undaunted. (mostly) (ok, i am a little daunted...but i'm puttin' a brave face onnit so work with me, ok?!) in fact i have high hopes that my TUESDAY will be more like this:

(& i hope that yours will, also!!!) ♥

i got nuthin'

to say, that is.

this morning.

which is maybe just as well, since i have no time, either.

so why not enjoy a hot dog?

or perhaps you'd prefer a cheezburger??

either way, i hope that you have a productive and ebullient wednesday.

and think of lots to say.

(and have time in which to say it!)

xolauren :)

if you're enjoying a beverage this morning...

...put it down before you continue. trust me. you cannot drink and read *this* at the same time.

are you ready??

ok, g'head and scroll down!

told ya!!! :)

if you're planning to use the ladder at all today...make sure the cats are INSIDE! you know...just in case THEY read
i can has cheezburger, too!

they say a picture is worth a thousand words

but for THIS picture, i only need *three* words:

dudes, you're busted!

...HOWEVER...

one cannot blame tipsy and sockrates for wanting to get their hands--are they called hands on a monkey? or...paws...or.....what??--well whatever you call the brownie-scoopers on a monkey, you cannot blame tipsy and sockrates for wanting to get theirs on these!

because these are not ordinary brownies, darlings. noper. these aren't even ordinary "made-from-scratch" brownies. these are "made-from-scratch-using-the-best-dark-chocolate-i've-ever-had" brownies! my friend deborah...who knows i how love really reeeeeeeeeally dark chocolate which isn't too sweet...sent me this, direct from switzerland:

the one on the right? yeah. it's 99% cacao. which, frankly, was too dark, even for me. actually, the 85% (a percentage i have enjoyed in other brands) was not quite sweet enough. in this case, the bar that was 70% was PERFECT. (which is why it is not in the pic. it did not last long enough to be photographed!) but you don't just throw away chocolate that is this rich, this flavorful, and this amazing. so lovely husband jeff and myself--fervent non-bakers that we are--were moved to make brownies.

i'd love to tell you more about this, but every minute i spend at my computer is a minute the brownies are un-guarded.

could somebody please fax me a glass of milk?!