You know those dreams when you're wearing 100% spandex and you're walkin around, lookin around, running errands, going here and there, and some loving people suggest into your ear that you should change clothes and although that's THE ONLY THING in the world that you want to do, you shrug them off and say, "Nah, I'm cool."???????

You don't?  

Oh, well I had one of those last night.

more brain vomit.

one great thing about being single is you can have make out dreams with handsome dudes without feeling guilty or awkward.

last night's brain vomit dream: although i have never been...como se dice..."athletic," the first thing i remember is being up to bat in a major league baseball game, wearing a cute dress, heels, and (thank heaven) no baseball cap. i was teamed presumably with the angels, because i was in their stadium with the crowd roaring heavenly enthusiasm. i was apparently about to bring it all home for them. the pitcher was winding up and suddenly i had this middle aged, pudgy guardian baseball angel advising me to not swing at the next two pitches, and i'd get walked to first base. guardian baseball angels do not lie, folks. a moment or two later i was leaping and bounding my way to first base. nice.

then, in that inexplicably omniscient way of dreams, i just knew that the next three hitters would ultimately succeed, and i would find myself stomping onto the home plate in no time. the excite-o-meter was off the charts. i was, all of a sudden, a total sports junkie, one of those "for the love of the game" people.

enter him:

he offers to buy me dinner with a winning, slightly off-kilter smile, so i just peace out of the game and aerate the baseball field with my stilettos, hand in hand with ryan gosling.

we went out, and were definitely having fun, so much fun that i slept through my alarm until lindsey woke me up with fifteen minutes to get ready and leave for work.

ryan gosling: like dr. luca from ER, a forever-my-dream-love.

brain vomit

i used to get a kick out of thinking my dreams were more like visions*.

this all started in 11th grade when i had a dream that 2 friends from different social pools started dating. both stood on their scoff boxes, and yet, about 3 months later, boom! a couple took flight (and 2 months later crashed and burned, but hey, i never said my vision included wedding bells).

fast forward to 2006. my missions papes were in, and the mail carrier and i were, of course, becoming fast friends. i was absolutely dying to know where i would go on my mission. one night i had a dream that i was called to serve in the virgin islands. haha! salt lake, don't bother sending it in writing, i know where i'm headed. then the next night i had a dream i went to costa rica. that one, interestingly enough, put a stop to me thinking my dreams were dictating my destination, since going to 2 missions at once is something i'm just flat out not talented enough to do -- i'll be the first to admit it.

i went on to have dreams that carried my missionary service to sweden, germany, and then finally i dreamed my family played a prank on me and took my real call, and made a fake call, had me read both letters, and try and figure out which was the real one. one was to texas and one was to ohio, and in my snobbery i said, "well who cares? they're both stateside!" and then i woke up on a tear soaked pillah. then got the snot-nosed wind knocked right out of me with the whole stateside-is-boring theory as soon as i entered the MTC. anyway so i thought, when i received my call, that since costa rica HAD indeed been in one of my dreams, i could still have my visionary groove....? maybe? since i ws asking myself i answered, "yep," i thought, "i still got (a little bit of) it!" carry on, carry on, carry on.

a few months ago i had a dream an ex-boyfriend of mine no longer prefers women, and i'd find out if that makes me visionary if it weren't for the fact that i don't want to know.

fast forward to last night. this is what lindsey calls a brain vomit dream. and it answers the question once and for all that my dreams are dreams, not visions, not indications of the events of the rapidly charging future, and this sits just great with me. last night's dream involved a juicy love triangle including

and

and

and david hopkins was also there wearing some awesome boots.

so yes, brain vomit.

*i hope everyone who reads this blog knows me and my sarcasm/exaggerative tendencies/self-deprecating-yet-perfectly-content-with-herself/self-appreciating-self-centered-yet-gloriously-humble ways. and if you don't, it probably would be a very annoying link to ever click on, but i don't care, because it's ALL ABOUT ME, as is, pretty much everything, right???