20th Sunday in Ordinary Time
August 17, 2014
Matthew 15:21-28
Have pity on me, Lord, Son of David! My daughter is
tormented by a demon.
Our Savior, willing
to be conquered by the prayers of the Canaanite woman, did not disdain to free
her daughter from demonic oppression. This mother's prayers won the mercy of
Jesus and inspire all parents as they entreat our Lord for every good thing for
their children.
How is it that our
prayers for others can be of value? What can a parent do to pray more
effectively for his children? Why does God seem at times to ignore our
petitions for the conversion of children, relatives, and friends?
The example of this
woman will profit is greatly as we answer these questions.
Can I merit salvation for another?
(Summa Theologica I-II, q.114, a.6)
The Baltimore
Catechism offers a simple definition: "Merit means the quality of
deserving well or ill for our actions." Merit can be understood in two
respects: condign merit and congruous merit.
Condign merit (de
condigno) refers to an action which of itself has a value so as to require as a
matter of strict justice some response on the part of another. While congruous
merit (de congruo) intends those acts which do not strictly demand a particular
response by their own interior value, but may gain such response on account of
the bonds of friendship with the other.
Thus, we state that
Christ alone can claim to have merited condignly the salvation of others. He
alone offered that which is of infinite value so as to make perfect
satisfaction for every sin.
On the other hand,
a man may merit his own salvation in one respect de condigno and in another de
congruo. For, if a meritorious act (that is, a good work accomplished by grace
in the state of grace) is considered as a work of that man, it is meritorious
de congruo, since his act can in no way be considered equal to the gift of
salvation but can claim a certain right to it on account of the friendship his
soul enjoys with God. Yet, if the work be considered on the be considered on
the part of the Holy Spirit who inspires the good action, it is clearly said to
merit eternal life de condigno since the action of God is of infinite value.
The Angelic Thomas
speaks well when he states that Christ alone can merit salvation for others in
terms of strict, condign merit. However, although a man may (in one respect)
merit salvation for himself in a condign manner (the work being considered as
proceeding from the Holy Spirit), yet he can in no way merit condignly for
another since the grace of God is given each one for his own salvation and the
grace of one is not sufficient unto the salvation of another.
Still, on account
of the great friendship which a soul enjoys with the Good God by the union of
charity and the gift of grace, a man may well expect to merit congruously both
the conversion and the salvation of others. Indeed, if we who are wicked do not
fail to love those whom our friends love, how much more will our Father give
many graces to those whom we love when we invoke the Lord who has made himself
our dearest Friend?
Thus, for one in
the state of grace and a friend of God, it is entirely possible to merit the
salvation of others by congruous merit. We do this especially through prayer
and sacrifice offered for the conversion of sinners, the perseverance of the
just, and the salvation of all.
How can I offer better and more effective prayer for my
children?
The woman of Canaan
is presented as a model of prayer. In particular, we see in her an example for
parents who pray for their children. We turn to the great scholar, Fr.
Cornelius a Lapide.
"Contemplate
the ideal of perfect prayer, and imitate it. This woman of Canaan teaches us to
pray.
"1. With great
humility, in that she acknowledges herself to be a dog.
2. With faith,
because she calls Christ the son of David, i.e., the Messiah, the God and
Saviour promised to the Jews.
3. With modesty
because she sets before Christ the right of dogs and her own misery; yet does
she not draw from thence the conclusion that Christ should heal her daughter,
but leaves that to Him.
4. With prudence,
in that she takes hold of Christ by His own words, and gently turns His
reasoning against Himself, into an argument for obtaining her desire.
5. With reverence,
with religion and devotion, because she made her supplication on her
knees.
6. With resignation
in that she did not say, “Heal my daughter,” but “help me,” in the manner which
shall seem to Thee best.
7. With confidence,
because although a Gentile, she had a firm hope that she would be heard by
Christ.
8. With
ardour.
9. With charity, in
that she made intercession for her daughter, as if she were anxious for
herself, saying, help me.
10. With constance
and perseverance, in that she persisted when she was twice repulsed and became
yet more earnest in prayer."
We add that a
parent has all the more reason to expect that his prayers for his children will
be answered, for it was to him that God entrusted the children not only for
their natural life but also for the right beginnings of their formation in the
spiritual life. Since Jesus gave the parent his children, the parent's prayers
have all the more power over the Sacred Heart of our Savior.
Indeed, whosoever
is entrusted by God with the care of souls -- and here we think especially of
priests in pastoral assignments, truly called "father" by those under
his care -- must have a particular claim to gaining grace for his children by
congruous merit.
Parents may pray
like this: "Lord, you gave me these children and put them under my care. I
have, for my part, given them back to you through the waters of baptism and the
practice of the faith. Receive my children again this day, oh Lord, as I beg
you, have mercy! You know what my children need far better than I, in my great
blindness, can hope to know. You love them with a love infinitely great than
the love of which my poor and too cold heart is capable. And, what gives me the
greatest hope, you are far more powerful than I. Receive them, Good Jesus, and
in your mercy give them, together with every good thing, continual conversion
of heart, perseverance in grace, and eternal life."
Three final points
If we see that a
parent can gain conversion and perseverance for his children by congruous merit
especially through prayer, there are three points to be observed.
First, the parent’s
works and prayers are meritorious for his children only insofar as he is a
friend of God. As this friendship is wounded by venial sin and destroyed by
mortal sin, it is clear that a parent's prayers will be meritorious only if he
be in the state of grace. Thus, sin must be avoided.
Again, as
attachment to sin wounds and impedes divine friendship, a parent's prayers and
works will be more meritorious as he is less attached to sin. While it is true
that we cannot in this life be entirely free of venial sins, we may at least be
free of attachment to all sins.
Finally, the parent
will gain the victory if he persevere in his prayer. In this respect, we warn
against the passion of sorrow which can quickly lead to discouragement and
spiritual sloth, eventually making the parent to give up on prayer. But, if we
persevere in prayer and are free from sin and attachment to sin, we can be sure
that God will not only give us the grace to be resigned to his will, but will
also either fulfill our desire or give something even greater.
