*tears*

JD: AIYOH!!! I forgot my wallet!

Me: don't worry. I can give you money. How much do you need?

JD: I only need 1 ringgit to buy Solivite.

Me: before or after school?

JD: before school.

Me: do you need more? If you spend your 1 ringgit then you won't have anymore money

JD: erm... you can give me one more dollar

Me: Sure? 

JD: one dollar and fifty cents la.

Me: *give him 1.50 and went down to help him with his bag. hugged and kissed him*

JD: *walked away..stop and U turn to come back and gave me a hug and kiss on lips and walked away*

Me: *tearing and quickly run into car and cried*

Which One Do You Love More?

People asked me "do you love your JD more or JT more?"

I said equally and no one believe me. So I did a test and I asked JD while JT was in sch 

Me: do you think I love you more or titi more? ( Risky question I know... )

JD: I think you love ME more

Me:  why?

JD: cos I always help you and titi is always tired.

^_^

And I did the same when JD was in sch

Me: titi do you think I love u more or kor kor more

JT: (He misunderstood and said ) I love you and kor kor same

Me: no, I mean, do you think I love you more than kor kor? Or love kor kor more than you?

JT : (And he replied very quickly) I think you love me more ^__________^

Happy that they both think I love them more than the other party. As long as they feel they are so loved, What other ppl think is not very important isn't it? ;)

Lion eat people?

Was feeding JT lunch in JD's sch canteen when we heard a lion dance commotion.


JT: is that lion dance?
Me: yeap.
JT: does the lion eat people?
Me: hmm.... Only the naughty ones.
JT: then we better NOT go there
Me: why? Do you think you are naughty?
JT: *head down and nod nod* the lion give angpow?
Me: only to the good ones. The bad ones they will swallow them up
JT: O_O !!!

So we went and he was pulling me away and said No mami!!!no! And we saw the lion's back dancer carried a boy under the lion's cape. I said "poor boy! Must be too naughty. Luckily the lion spit him out and he's a good boy now".

JT just nod nod and said "luckily it's over now"

*lol* you should see his facial expression then. 

Do you know why he was so afraid? Cos his teacher just told me that he took out the homework that he was supposed to do at home and told his teacher "I don't wanna do homework. I hate homework" And he thought he really didn't bring the homework back. He didn't know that his teacher put the book back and told his evil mom about his plan. *lol*

Yes, me and the crappy things I say to my kids.

How come you know wan?

JD's sch had a mini celebration with lion dance right before cny. When he came back I asked him what happened in sch and he said "nothing...nothing" and then I said

"let me guess. got 2 lions..right? and they play the drum like this *lion dance drum humming-tak tong chiang, tong chiang tong chiang chiang chiang* and then the back guy will lift the front guy up, and then the front guy will open and close the lion mouth right? and then the lion ate some oranges and then he spit out the oranges , it was nicely opened up right???" 

He was shocked that I know and he went "how come you know wan?".  and I said "cos I'm your mother lor. I know everything you do wan...".

Chewah. like real.

The crappy stuff that I tell my kids, unbelievable.

Of crisis and weeds.

Always believe that guys should also be taught to do house and gardening chores from young so that they won't leave it all to the wife in the future. I don't Want my DIL to Curse me :p

Anyway, So yesterday I Asked JD to help me pull the weeds in my garden and he did..

JD: what am I doing?

Me: you're weeding.

JD: what happens if we never weed the weeds?

Me: then the garden will have alot of weeds growing and then they will multiply and fill this garden up with alot of weeds.

JD: *worried* then you will have a weed crisis!!!!

Me: exactly! So you must pull till the roots come out.

JD: ....... So how do you smoke this weed?

Me: huh? Smoke this weed?

JD: ya. You smoke the weeds. This is weeds right?

Me: *slap forehead- damn YouTube and smosh videos!!" no this is not the weed that ppl smoke AND... Any type of weeds are BAD! This one that grows in my garden and also the ones people smokes. Those are drugs. It's bad bad for you. Ok?

JD: oh.. Ok. Bad for brains ah?

Me: yes. For brains. For lungs. Everything. It will kill you.

Aiyoh the things they learn via YouTube! Why cant they teach more positive stuff?

Why they don't know me?

I was preparing something in the kitchen and suddenly JD ran down looking rather sad and said ..

JD: mami mami.. Come I show you something in the computer

Me: why? I'm busy right now.

JD: I went to google and type nciku like you.

Me: oh what did you type? You tell me here lah

JD: Then I wrote 曾健若 and they say no match found. Why they don't know me mami? Why?

Me: *lol* of course lah. You are not a thing ma. You are a person and there are so many people in this world. How to know everyone?

JD: then what can I find?

Me: find someother things lor. Like big dog? Small dog. Anything lah.

JD: okay!

Haha aiyoh this son.. *shake head*

Is she your step mother?

while on our way back from sch on friday...

Me: nah... tomorrow you're going to robotic class you know. You must listen to your teacher okay? Let her finish talking, then only you ask question. okay?
JD: mami, did you go to robotic class last time?
Me: nope.
JD: why?
Me: Cos pohpoh won't let me join anything. She said its expensive. Any classes also cannot join. Like i like to dance, she don't allow me to go ballet, I like art she don't allow me to go art class..what also cannot join..
JD: is......she.. your step mother?
Me: ah???? Nolah. She is my real mother.
JD: Then....why she don't let you do anything at all?
Me: hehe cos.. last time poh poh is busy working and she think there is no need to join any classes lor. But now, I have you and titi, I will see what class you all like to attend, then if its not too expensive, then I let you go lor. But then you cannot say go one day and then tomorrow don't wanna go cos then you will waste my money, you understand?
JD: yes.

And he happily went for his first robotic class last sat. I just hope that he will excel in this :)

Of fingernails and housework

While cutting Justin's toenails..

JD: mami.. *looking at my fingernails* why is teacher lee's fingernail so long?
Me: oh.. cos she wanna look pretty. And of course no need to do housework lor.
JT: hey.. that's no good you know?
Me: what is no good?
JT: long fingernails la.
Me: why?
JT: cos cannot do housework. You know mami. You are pretty....when you mop the floor.
Me: I.am.pretty.when.I'm.mopping.house?
JT: yeah, very pretty when you are mopping house.
Me: hahahhaha thank you ah.......(thinking wah pandai ah this fler angkat my feet so I need to do more housework)
JD: mami, I will help you to do housework wan.
JT: me too! Me too! but..................only when I'm NOT tired.
JD and Me: BUT YOU'RE ALWAYS TIRED!
JT: yeah :P

What are you thinking about?

in the car, when suddenly everyone is so quiet...

Me: titi.. are you sleeping?
JT: nope. I am just dreaming (daydreaming) about making a heart for you.
Me: Wah so nice....thank you. Kor Kor? Are you sleeping?
JD: I'm also day dreaming. I'm dreaming about how to make a gold ring for your ringman finger. Because now you only have silver.
Me: wow. So nice la you kor kor. But I already have a ring on my ringman.
JD: But yours is silver only. Do you like silver or gold better?
Me: *lol* I like diamond.
JD: No. I am asking you if you like gold or silver.
Me: I prefer silver. Actually I like platinum.
JD: You like silver ah? Then I shall stop dreaming about making a gold ring for you. Because you already have what you like.
Me: :D

Of Death, Egg and Spoon.

In the car last night...

JD: mami.. when you are old, where are you going to stay? Old town with poh poh and koong koong?

Me: No ah. I stay in my own house, with you all lor.

JD: then koong koong and poh poh will die soon?

Me: nolah. Not so fast la.

JD: when are they going to die?

Me: aiyoh when they are older la.

JD: when?

Me: after you get married and have kids la.

JD: oh....

JT: mami, if your dadi dead (dies) what are you going to do?

Me: i'll cry and I'll be sad.

JT: you don't be sad. I'll help you.

Me: huh? How?

JT: I'll lay a very big egg, *pooot* like this. It's big okay. But you cannot hatch it just like that. You need to use a big spoon and knock it so it will hatch. Then you will get a new dadi again. 

Me: *lol* sure or not?

JT: yeah. But then you gotto feed him alot of food so that he can grow big again.

Me: *lol* When I die, are you gonna be sad?

JT: yeah.....I'll be sad *think think*.....mami.. when I die.. what are you gonna do?

Me: I'll be very very very very sad and I'll cry for many many many days.

JT: don't worry la. Just lay another egg. But its a tiny one. And you no need to use spoon to hatch it. I'll hatch and come back again. Just feed me alot of food and I'll be Justin again.

JD: hoi.... Human don't come from egg la! *irritated* They come from....... mami where did human come from?

Me: neh..... *think think* from tummy lor.

JT: You mean, human not from egg ah? Then what comes from eggs?

Me: birds, chicken, duck, blablablabla but mammals like elephant, giraffe, dog, cat all come from tummy. They come out from the mummy tummy and they look like their mummy wan.

JD: *eyes wide* You mean even giraffe???????

Me: yeah! giraffe too!

JD: when giraffe come out, is the neck long or short?

Me: long la.

JD: HOW DID THEY HIDE IT INSIDE THE TUMMY? They curl or what?

Me: *lol yeah they curl and hide inside the tummy*

JD: *scratch head*

When I die..

Me: titi, when I die, I give you all......My pots okay?
JT:* put his pointer upwards and wave it like a wiper* no... No..... Cannot!
Me: why? I give you all my pots wor.
JT: cos.... The people in the tv said it's not good to take ppl's things!

Haha like real! If I were to say I'll give him all the choc and Ice cream after I die, proly he'll say "okay! Thank you!"

I don't wanna be a doctor

Me: jayden, seriously what do you wanna be when you grow up?
Jd: a policeman lah.....(tired of answering me cos I've been bugging him and asking him this question so many times edi!!)
Me: dowan lah.... Don't be a policeman lah. What about be doctor?? Then you can take care of me when I'm old and sick?
Jd: no. I don't wanna be a doctor.
Me: why? Doctor good ma. Not dangerous.
Jd: you think I no need to go home is it?
Me: who say doctors don't go home?
Jd: if I work as doctor in the hospital then I need to work 24 hours you know? Then I cannot go home!
Me: chey... Hospital is 24 hours but... Doctors work in shift wan mah. Take turns to go home wan. And you can work like Dr Yong at the clinic then you no need to work 24 hours ler...
Jd: *thinking mode* hmmmm

I have no idea what gave him the idea that policeman can go home and doctors cannot go home. Haha silly boy!

Is yours broken?

At home before going out...

Me: titi, come and put on your underwear.

JT: but i don't want to wear underwear today. 

Me: you must. otherwise, when you go to sheeshee, and you accidentally zip yr kukubird, then we will have a problem. Need to go to the hospital and cut....the zip. Very painful wan you know when your kkb got zipped up?

JT: oh... is it because you also zipped your kukubird last time and then your kkb got broken, then you become a girl. Right? Is your kkb broken mami? Last time you also have kkb wan right? But broken edi. So you become girl!

ME: O.o

Can you come....

Justin argued with me. So I said..

Me: okay fine. I'm not talking to you.

JT: okay fine! I'll talk to dadi.

Dadi: No. if mami don't wanna talk to you, then I also dun wanna talk to you.

JT: *sob* nobody wanna talk to me....*sob sob sob* pls.. talk to me?

Me: nope. Cos u're naughty. So I'm not gonna talk to you.

JT: *sob louder* but.. nobody talk to me anymore...

Me: If you're naughty, then no one will talk to you

JT: Uwa... Uwa.... Uwaaa uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa mami.. pls....talk....to....mee........dadi........uwaaa uwa uwa uwa uwa uwa uwa... *walk out of kitchen*

Me: aik. go out edi.

JT: uwa... Kor kor.. can you please come and listen to me talk? Uwaaa nobody want to listen to me anymore. Kor kor come.... uwaaaaaaaaaaa

JD: *playing ipad* yeah.. u talk la.. u talk..

JT: kor kor.... Uwa.. dadi and mami don't wanna talk to me..

JD: yeah ok! ok! *continue playing ipad*

No Kissing

So you've heard about S, Justins' self-proclaimed gf. Actually S also acknowledged him as her bf. *pengsan*

Anyway, I was talking to JT in the car while waiting for his dad:

Me: Justin, I tell you first ah.. You go to school, can have friends. But No Kissing. Okay?

JT: But, S kissed me first.

Me: I know. I saw. But then, you don't kiss back okay?

JT: but why she can kiss me but I cannot kiss her back ?

Me: eh cannot.... you know. Her daddy is as big as a bear. Later S go home and tell her daddy that you kissed her, then tomorrow he comes to school and look for you, wanna smack you. How?

JT: oo very big wan ah?

ME: yes... very big like a polar bear like that.

JT: ooo then I don't kiss her.

ME: but....did you kiss her before?

JT: no. I never. Only S kiss my hand. I never kiss her before.

ME: good good.. no kissing okay? Later you gotto yum seng (get married) with her.

JT: *kiss* Now, I kissed you edi. I need to Yum Seng with you *cheeky laugh*

ME: haha Notty boy!

Aiyoh my son is only 3 years old and I am telling him that he cannot kiss girls in sch. Can you believe that?  *smack forehead*

The powerful sweet

FYI, I am a buddhist and my neighbour is a Christian. Sometimes when I'm busy I'll send my kids over and she will babysit them for me. And sometimes she will teach them to pray to, of course Jesus. So this morning I need to attend a meeting and I was supposed to send the kids to sch then attend the meeting. But Justin was coughing really badly and so Big C sent him over to my neighbour's house. When I got home, my neighbour sent him back to me and told me a story and it goes like this:

JT: *cough cough cough*


Neighbour (D): Oh dear. Justin, why don't you pray to Jesus and ask him to take away your cough?

JT: okay. Jesus, please take away my cough.


D: Good. *went to kitchen and took a Vit C sweet for Justin*

JT: Thank You. So, this is Jesus? *holding and looking at the sweet*


D: LOL!

My lil dude. So innocent and cute ^^ (for now...) he must be thinking how come this sweet called 'Jesus' is so powerful can take away the cough. haha

Saturday is no plastic bag day

We're at Mattel warehouse sale at the last hour before closing. Luckily my friend helped us to book the toys otherwise we will go home empty handed. While paying, JD was angry that the lady placed the toys into the plastic bag and tied a cable tie around it.
JD: I want my Finn micmissile! Don't put into the plastic bag
Me: eh... Need to put inside the plastic bag wan. They will check when we go out. If it's not in the plastic bag then it's considered we stole the toys.
JD: But... Buy why? I thought Saturdays are No-Plastic-Bag-Day. Why you use plastic bag?
Staff: *stoned and laughed*
Me: haha now u know why I have alot of grey hair?

The crazy, naughty & angry one

Was at JD 's sch,I've just parked my car and told JT ...

Me: ok. Let's go get the crazy one.
JT: ok. Let's go take the crazy one. Then me leh?
Me: you're of course the notty one lah....
JT: ah ... Ok. The notty and the ANGRY one is going to take the crazy one!
Me: eh, who's the angry one?
JT: *giggle* you lah...
Me: 

I throw mami's cane away edi!

JT: Dadi, I throw Mami's cane (hanger) away edi!
Me: *overheard* oh really?? then I will go supermarket and buy 100 pcs more.
JT: then I throw samo!
Me: Then I go buy samo!
JT: Then........*think think*....I fast fast run away!

hahhaa he know that he cannot stop me from buying more hanger. So the wisest option is to , of course run away. :P

The Witch

I went to pick Jayden up and suddenly he told me :

JD: Mami, the witch in the Hansel and Gretel book is not a good witch
Me: Oh why ah ?
JD: cos ah..she went and prepared a feast for Hansel & Gretel. All sweet things lah.
Me: Then? Kids like mah
JD: No. She should cook soup with brocolli and carrot. And feed them rice.
Me: Hah.. what kind of witch is that la?

So funny that he said that cos he likes to eat rice WITH SOUP more than desserts and he expects Hansel and Gretel to be the same also.

Then I though some more.... if there's really a witch that served rice with soup, then she won't be able to catch any children at all. And most probably , the only witch that serves rice with soup for kids is me. Haha!

Ai... I know. I'm gila edi. hahahhahahah Have a great weekend!