Creative Kiwis . . .

DESIGNER DRUGS ARE BIG in New Zealand, according to a post on The Economist, “A New Prescription”, and the Kiwi government has had to come to terms with the situation. Unlike Stevie and the CONs, for whom prisons are perfection, the Kiwis have decided that regulation and taxation is the only sustainable policy.

Sick of trying to keep up with drugmakers, the government is trying a new tack. Last month a law was passed which offers drug designers the chance of getting official approval for their products. If they can persuade a new “Psychoactive Substances Regulatory Authority” that their pills and powders are low risk, they will be licensed to market them, whether or not they get people high. Drugs will have to undergo clinical trials, which the government expects to take around 18 months—much less than for medicines, because the drugs will be tested only for toxicity, not for efficacy. Drugs that are already banned internationally, such as cocaine and cannabis, are ineligible. Only licensed shops will sell the drugs, without advertising and not to children.

Pole-dancing pedestrians . . .

REALLY. ACCORDING TO THE TELEGRAPH, "Traffic signs in New Zealand destroyed by prostitutes performing stunts". Dozens of traffic signs have been destroyed by prostitutes performing pole-dances in the street to attract clients, officials in New Zealand's biggest city have revealed, and according to Paul Chapman in Wellington, the pole-count is climbing. Ya gotta love it, hope it catches on here. Holey-Moley, we got pole-dancing pedestrians! Now, that's a driving distraction, for sure: erotic pipe-bending. 

"The poles are part of their soliciting equipment and they often snap them.  "Some of the prostitutes are big, strong people."

No shit, Sherlock.

The Battle of Beersheba

Trench warfare was to become the icon of the Great War. Yet, far away from the mud of Belgium and France an army which relied on mobility and maneuver was about to make history.

On October 31st, 1917, ninety years ago, at the edge of the Negev desert in what was then Palestine, two nations emerged and committed themselves to the force of arms in an event which would put a seal on their unique status.

Where Canada makes claim to a right to speak on its own behalf after the Canadian led assault on Vimy Ridge, two other British dominions, fighting in the same war, also claim such a right for actions of their own.

Germany's eastern ally, Turkey, had fortified a line from Gaza to Beersheba. In early 1917 there were two attempts to break the Gaza-Beersheba line to no avail. By the autumn of 1917 British forces in Palestine had been reorganized, reinforced and provided with new leadership.

Leading the Desert Mounted Corps, comprised of the ANZAC Mounted Division (1st and 2nd Australian Light Horse Brigades and the New Zealand Mounted Rifle Brigade) and the Australian Mounted Division (3rd and 4th Austrlian Light Horse Brigades and the 5th (British) Yeomanry Brigade), was Australian General Henry Chauvel, the first Australian to command an Allied army corps.

Beersheba offered little. Sitting 30 miles inland from the Mediterranean shore, the wells of Beersheba were one of the few supplies of water along the Turkish line stretching south from Gaza. By fortifying Beersheba and increasing the defences closer to Gaza the Turks felt they could prevent Allied activity by denying them access to sufficient water. The British, realizing that Gaza would be too difficult to take, viewed Beersheba as critical to controlling that section of Palestine.

Given the direction of approach, the Turkish fortification of Tel el Saba, a mound which commanded a complete view of the surrounding plain and the Hebron road, would have to be taken first. Further, if Beersheba was not taken in one day, the Allied troops would have to withdraw in search of water.

The Australian Light Horse and the New Zealand Mounted Rifles were not really cavalry. Unlike the British 5th Yeomanry, they did not carry swords and were not expected to fight from horseback. They were actually mounted infantry - foot soldiers. The Australians and New Zealanders were expected to use their mounts to reach a predetermined destination and then advance from there on foot to their objective.

On the morning of 31 October 1917 British artillery began the assault. Using classic infantry tactics the British moved forward from the south and west of Beersheba, brought their artillery forward. At the same time the Turks were observed reinforcing Tel el Saba. Under cover of artillery, the 3rd Regiment Australian Light Horse and the New Zealand Auckland Regiment advanced on Tel el Saba. By 3 in the afternoon, the New Zealanders had fought their way into Tel el Saba, securing the Hebron road.

A great deal of time had been lost and by 4:30 in the afternoon the decision was taken to capture and occupy Beersheba immediately. Brigadier William Grant, commanding the 4th Australian Light Horse Brigade, (now with only two regiments), gave the order to advance at a trot in artillery order with 15 feet between the squadrons which made up the regiment.

The original plan had called for the lighthorsemen to advance on horseback, dismount and then make an infantry assault on foot. However, as the sun was waning, Chauvel ordered Grant to take Beersheba forthwith, remaining mounted during the assault.

Within minutes of stepping off, the two regiments of the 4th Brigade Australian Light Horse, lacking swords, drew bayonets and spurred their horses to a gallop. They had committed to a cavalry charge.

The Turkish defenders were caught unawares. Expecting the lighthorsemen to dismount and complete their attack on foot, the Turkish riflemen failed to adjust their sights quickly enough and found themselves firing over the heads of the charging Australians. The lighthorsemen jumped the trenches, dismounted and routed the Turks from behind their lines. The Turks, surprized by the charge and completely disorganized, were only too willing to surrender. As reinforcements charged into the town the Turks panicked and ran. By nightfall the Australians had secured Beersheba. In fact, the charge of the 4th Brigade had gone so fast that Chauvel was unaware of the success for almost an hour after the town had been taken.

The New Zealanders at Tel el Saba and the Australians at Beersheba had changed the course of their countries' futures. And the 4th Brigade Australian Light Horse performed the last organized and successful cavalry charge in the history of warfare.

On 31 October 2007, some of the descendants of that battle gathered in the town once known as Beersheba. They crossed the Negev and made the approach to the town on horseback in uniforms of the Australian Light Horsemen and New Zealand Mounted Rifles. This time there was no charge. They walked their horses into Beersheba. They carried wreaths and wore poppies, their bayonets remaining sheathed. They came to commemorate the dead on both sides of that battle 90 years ago.

And they brought a message. Pursue peace.

The thin edge of a very dangerous wedge

Via Stageleft, the New Zealand parliament has voted in a bill which is the slippery slope into government control of that country's news media:

New Zealand politicians, upset at being seen as lazy and offensive, have banned journalistic satire as well as coverage that ridicules or denigrates them, according to new rules passed on Thursday. Members of New Zealand's parliament voted overwhelmingly in favour of the new rules. Just six members of the 121-seat parliament were opposed. The new provision makes it a contempt of parliament if television footage is used for "satire, ridicule or denigration." Photographers are no longer able to take still shots during sessions but television cameras can. Leader of the House Michael Cullen suggested it was too easy for photographers to take shots that were out of context.

Like perhaps, sleeping or flipping a finger at an opponent.

Several newspapers and television stations reacted angrily to the upcoming ban, which was revealed on Monday. They showed images from the next day's parliamentary debate of politicians asleep, gesturing offensively, reading fashion magazines and using their cellphones. Media said they would no longer be able to show these images under the new rules, and would face jail if found guilty of contempt. Cameras have been banned for periods of several days to a week on occasions that parliament finds those media organisations to have brought the House into disrepute. Last year, New Zealand television station TV3 was banned for three days after it showed a picture of a politician repeatedly making an obscene gesture.

Sounds all too familiar, doesn't it?

New Zealand has had its problems in the past. In the late 1980s it was literally bankrupt. Drastic measures had to be taken just to be able to make monthly interest payments on their national debt. In 1992, New Zealand's net debt stood at almost 50% of that country's gross domestic product.

There was unhappiness everywhere.

The NZ dollar has been on the same roller coaster-ride as many world currencies but at one point it fell to $0.39 US. Anyone buying New Zealand beef would have noticed a good quality product for about 1/2 the price of the same product from North American producers. It also meant New Zealanders took a national pay cut.

New Zealand used to have a bicameral parliament. Similar to many Commonwealth governments using the Westminster system New Zealand's upper house of parliament was known as the Legislative Council. Members of the Legislative Council were initially appointed for life modeled on the British House of Lords. Due to stacking by successive prime ministers however, that was changed in 1891 and MLCs served for seven years. What is little known among many Commonwealth countries is that since 1914 New Zealand had legislation in place to elect, by proportional representation, the Legislative Council for a fixed period of six years. And they never followed through. Instead, in 1951, the NZ government abolished the upper house. To cause the Legislative Council to vote FOR the idea of upper house abolition, then prime minister Sidney Holland appointed twenty members to the Legislative Council to vote for their own abolition. They were known as the "suicide squad".

The abolition of the upper house of the New Zealand parliament was intended to be an interim measure until new legislation to create a second chamber of parliament could be passed. Nothing has happened and New Zealand, for better or for worse, remains unicameral.

Anyway, back to the legislation in question.

The New Zealand parliament has decided that, in order to ameliorate a situation which can clearly be held out as censorship, it would provide a continuous, unedited, streamed broadcast of parliament, available on the internet, whenever the House is sitting.

That's fair enough, but the rules associated with that streaming broadcast are somewhat draconian. You can watch parliament, and you can go to the pub and discuss what you saw, but don't take a portion of that taxpayer-funded broadcast and make anything but a favourable public comment. It's now against the law.

There is some comfort to be taken from this event, however. It's nice to know that New Zealand's politicians aren't terribly different from ours: Self-serving, feckless, egotistical, thin-skinned wanks.