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Monday, December 24th, 2001
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2:49 am
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i sometimes wish it were possible
for me to go to bed at a reasonable
hour, and awaken refreshed from a
good night's sleep.
ah well.
current mood: tired at last.
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| Sunday, December 23rd, 2001
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4:00 pm
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initial frustration yields to an eventual plan.
although i completely forgot about having
dinner tonight with the fam (minus dad).
so no lotr. sadly. not that dinner is so bad,
but still.
in any case, did get one present for jim at
least though in the process i also bought
lovage and the funkstörung remix album
on vinyl at sonic boom. though i had the
best of intentions of shopping for others.
oh well. now i must head out to the u-district
for what will hopefully conclude my shopping
expeditions for the season. then after dinner,
i shall spend the remainder of the evening
burning cds and reading. so everything was
salvaged, more or less.
current mood: recovered.
current music: who else? crooked fingers-sad love.
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1:18 pm
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bah.
ah well, beautiful day and all that.
so i'm going to stroll down to archie
mcphees and hope for the best, with
perhaps a few other stops along the way.
then it's cd burning time, until i depart.
was maybe going to hook up with mike
today, but since he's going to be off in
woodenville, it doesn't seem likely. so
i'll have to wait until xmas evening. not
so bad, all in all. i wonder how his snow
camping trip was. he was worried about
being buried in snow. too long spent living
in georgia, i suppose. silly.
current mood: thirsty.
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4:01 am - lake mowich.
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starlight in my father's eyes
refracted into something more
brilliant than suns burning out
instead the unsteady cold hands
and lungfuls of chill air
turned mountain side nights
to a universal codex of wavering
spheres and obscure
nebulous washes of distant lights.
and to fall into sleep again
was to dream of a clear dawn;
a lake that answered the sky.
current mood: something else entirely.
current music: crooked fingers-devils train.
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3:03 am - overall, a fine, fine day.
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any day that kicks off with a FUN
time taking care of xmas shopping
is on the right track, as far as i'm
concerned. and marcus', for starting
off slower than an average weekday,
turned out rather well, all in all.
great time with dave and thomas,
jim came down at the end, and i had
a few really wonderful moments of
music in there as well. smoked too
many cloves, but hey, waddyagonnado.
and this week should, by all rights, be
decent as well. finishing up the rest of
my shopping tomorrow, some of which
at archie mcphees. laundry, chores, bills,
and then lotr at the cinerama. work and
then fambly for xmas eve. mom's for the
big day itself, and aprés ça, kimberly's
for the post holiday food and herb fest,
with all the friends and co-workers, as
well as mike more likely than not.
next friday there's hopefully a kickass
party to attend, and then new year's.
and this new year's will almost by default
be better than last year's.
and now i might have to do a am/pm run
for chips and salsa. after all, why not?
current mood: a mite peckish, but content.
current music: crooked fingers-surrender is treason.
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2:51 am
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hey jord, guess what i'm listening to...
yep, that's right, among my own xmas purchases
was one sigur ros 'svefn-g-englar' single.
so now i bask in the glory that is 'n´yja lagi?'.
beauty, beauty, beautiful.
current mood: content.
current music: sigur ros-n´yja lagi?.
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| Saturday, December 22nd, 2001
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7:51 pm
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although i really am starting to lose any
kind of cheer when it comes to the holiday
season, i must say my shopping expedition
was actually quite enjoyable thanks to kim.
even found a gift for her dad, amazingly enough.
and i managed to shop both for myself, and
about half of my list, so all in all not too
shabby. and plus, kim is fun to shop with.
and now to get ready, get set and go go go.
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1:25 am
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even being very pleasantly stoned
couldn't rescue me from the bummer
that was the elliot smith show. alaska
were basically a one-note simon and
garfunkel clone, only even more tranquilized.
then, after what seemed like a million
years, elliot finally strolled out, plucked
out two songs, made it halfway through
a third, forgot the set list, got another
copy of the set, studied it for couple
minutes to figure out a song he could
play, stumbled through a few bars of
a couple more songs, and i'd had it.
cabbed it back to my car, and split.
i don't mind performers getting fucked
up, as long as they still PERFORM.
anyway, still feeling alright, and looking
forward to the wetvac, shopping (i'm looking
at you, kim), and then marcus'.
and now, for some rehydration.
current mood: warm and peaceful.
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| Friday, December 21st, 2001
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11:17 am
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off to work,
then off to the shew,
then, hopefully, off to
a welcome back party,
then tomorrow, get that
wetvac, and do my holiday
shopping.
i think sunday kim may be
having a fondue party.
i hope so.
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2:23 am - michael johnson.
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that was dirty pool, and i intend
to let matt know in no uncertain
terms as much.
'tis a long and thorny story, which
is best not recapped here, at least
not now. but it did make for a much
more emotional and upsetting night
than i had originally anticipated.
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2:17 am - two questions.
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first:
if you were to sum up the past ten years
of your life in two words, what would they be?
as an example, and cautionary tale, i will offer;
Late Fees.
second:
are the british-and all their ilk (u.s., various despots
and entrenched third world regimes), both past and
current-the most pernicious evil civilised man has
ever known, and, for that matter, is likely to know?
i will keep that answer to myself , for now.
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| Thursday, December 20th, 2001
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8:24 pm
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thank goodness for chef boyrdee.
and that i get paid at midnight and two am.
xmas, bills, and food. in that order.
oh, and,
tomorrow is elliot smiff.
which might be good, who knows?
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1:18 am - sated.
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and now it's time to read in bed.
'the quincunx' is coming along quite
nicely, as a matter of fact. very
enjoyable to read.
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12:02 am - ooer!
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the fellowship of the ring was quite
delightful and full of eye candy.
and it was about the midpoint of the
film when i realized that i was famished.
so now i must eat.
current mood:  hungry
current music: the shins-girl inform me.
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| Wednesday, December 19th, 2001
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10:20 am
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off to buy my brother's bday present,
then work,
and then lotr at last.
current mood: pretty good.
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| Tuesday, December 18th, 2001
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11:13 am - rain again.
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i want it to be tomorrow already,
so i can go see LOTR with my
brother...already have my ticket too.
now i'm off to catch my bus.
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12:54 am - oh yes, we are the champions my friend.
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so papillon finally overcame the odds,
and in spite of my rather stony contribution
to the proceedings, won the day.
and then a few pints of guiness at the ole p,
and we're all ready for a bit of the fast food
gut bomb.
or are we?
current music: oh yes, i do like to kill.
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| Monday, December 17th, 2001
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9:51 am
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the water appears to have receded somewhat.
and if the sunlight sticks around, perhaps there
will be less water still when i get back home.
and it is time for papillon to take the cash, methinks.
current mood: somewhat rested.
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3:00 am
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having solved the monday crossword,
i think i'll give sleep another shot.
after all, i have no where else to go.
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1:30 am
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i can never seem to sleep when i want
to, even when that's what my beleaguered
body most craves.
and the damn worms keep coming up out
of the woodwork, at the least convenient times.
start small, and start at home, right?
this seems to be the gist of my current working
theory. keep going forward, but with an eye on
the work yet to be done. most of all, do the work.
and maybe there is solace to be found in the
toil, a kind of weary relief. nothing else has made
me feel safe, much less whole. i'm fine with having
limitations and faults, but i have to stop denying
myself access to my strengths and talents.
i have to make this work. i'll never have anything
else, and this simply will not do any longer.
if i could get the outline right, i could write a book.
'i could be a genius if i just put my mind to it.'
current mood: not asleep.
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