Nobody wants anything I've got... [entries|friends|calendar]
iLLriTe

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

(Talk shit, sucka!)

Where my baby is? [16 Nov 2003|03:00am]
[ mood | drunk ]
[ music | Touch Me : Supreme Beings of Leisure ]

Jonathan is staying in Carthage tonight.

I miss him so bad.

We(userinfogypsies66) went to the liquor sto' and bought some everclear. So I am runky, and missing my man something hella.

God...I hate to even spend one night without him.

I am so drunk.

Touch me, now.

(5 dealt wit fools | Talk shit, sucka!)

boyfriend survey thingy. [15 Nov 2003|09:15pm]
[ mood | in love ]
[ music | Supreme Beings of Leisure : Never the Same ]

+ Boyfriend's name?
Jonathan Daniel Waller

+ Age?
He'll be 24 in like 3 weeks or so.

+ Livejournal user name?
userinfocatalyst1979

+ How long have you been together?
Well, we decided to be exclusive after his second visit to my hometown, which was in June of this year. It was long distance until I moved here to Nashville, in early september.

+ How long did you know each other before you got together?
We met online in March of this year. so....about 4 months.

+ Eye color?
Big, Beautiful Brown Eyes. God...I love his eyes.

+ Hair color?
Brown, but he shaves it.

+ Fashion:
He has awesome fashion sense. That was actually one of the first things I thought was cool about his pictures. He wore dope clothes. He is hella sexy.

+ How serious is it?
This is serious! Serious enough for me to move 12 hours to be with him. I can see it lasting longer than forever. Because my love for him will never die.

+ Do your parents like him?
They love him. We actually just went home(my old home) and stayed with my mom for a day and a night. They bombarded him with questions, but my mom can tell he makes me happy. And that makes her like him even more.

+ Do you trust him?
Although I am a bit insecure, I trust him completely.

+ Would you share a toothbrush with him?
I would share anything I had with him.

+ Does he let you wear his pants?
I'm sure if I wanted to he would let me. Avtually, I wear his khakis to work all the time...so yeah.

+ Do you have a shirt of his to sleep in that smells like him?
I have him to sleep with, which smells much better than his shirts. I love the way he smells.

+ Can you picture having kids with him?
I am not sure if he wants kids(I actually think he doesn't) but hell yeah. I think he would make an awesome parent. We would have cool kids.

+ How many kids?
1 or 2.

+ What do you like the most about him?
The way he understands me, and makes me feel so good when I am down. His taste in music. The way he smells. How he mumbles random weird shit in his sleep. His cooking. His sense of humor. The way he sings to his favortie songs. How smart he is. The lsit goes on and on.

+ What bothers you the most about him?
How he used to be a label whore. I was always pretty anti when it came to buying expensive shit. I think he is realizing that you don't need expensive shit to enjoy life. I think it was more about validating himself to others, than it was for him. He'll figure it out, and we will live happily ever after. Even if we are not well off.

+ Does he have a temper?
Not really. I mean, I have seen him get mad, but it is more like aggravated, and it quickly subsides. He has never gotten ill with me, and he is really quite level headed. Another reason I love him.

+ What is the best present he has ever given you?
He sent me(well, gave me rather) a card when he came to visit. It was so cute, and made me cry after he left, and I realized what he meant to me. Honestly, the best present he has given me is love, and happiness.

+ Are you happy to be with him?
Undoubtedly. My happiness radiates from my body, and I actually wake up happy now. Not like...wanting to be dead and stuff. Anyone who knows me can see, I have never really been happy before. And he gave that to me.

+ Do you think you could do better?
No. I could never love anyone as much as I love him.

+ What's his most attractive feature?
He has an amazing face. Like, I could just die staring into his eyes, and that would be fine. Actually, everything about him attracts me.

+ Does he smoke, drink, or do drugs?
He smokes smigs, pot, but doesn't really drink. He has done other drugs, but not habitually. He is the perfect man for me. Perfect.

+ Does he have any piercings/tattoos?
He's got his ears and nipples pierced. No tattoos as of yet. He used to have his labret and eyebrow done, too.

+ Does he have any scars that you know of?
Above his left eye(I think) he has a little scar. No other ones that I have noticed.

+ Is he a party guy or homebody?
I think he is well balanced. We can go out and have fun, but for the most part, we just chill out at home. I know it is getting old, but he is awesome. I'll use the p word again. Perfect.

+ What are foods he hates?
Hmmmmm. I know there are things he hates, but I can't think of any off the top of my head.

+ How long did it take for you to like him?
I liked him the first minute I read his journal. And then we chatted and I fell even more. And then we met, and it was set in stone. He had to be mine forever. And now he is. And my life could not be more complete.

I love him more than life itself.

(11 dealt wit fools | Talk shit, sucka!)

lift me up...up...high up on your love [12 Nov 2003|09:47pm]
[ music | Kylie : Come Into My World. ]

Talk about a good fucking weekend.

It is all wednesday, and I am just now updating.

Anywho...I had one of the greatest weekends of my life. Jonathan and I took a 24 hour road trip, to Wilkes-Barre. God, that ride is so hella long, I almost went nuts.

I kind of suck at updating my journal, once a coniderable amount of time has passed. I just want to remind myself how much fun I actually did have, and how much I love Jonathan.

He has made my life much more than worth-while.

I finally got the wire for my camera, so some new user pics are sure to come.

Love to all!

(Talk shit, sucka!)

home sweet hometown [07 Nov 2003|02:42pm]
[ mood | bouncy ]
[ music | Sean Paul : Infiltrate ]

I gotsta start packing for the W-B, since we are leaving in about 3 hours!

I can't wait to see everyone!

I need to find the time to visit my brother, so I can see my nephew. I am really excited to see my sister and my mom too.

Not to mention userinfosilvercivic98ex and userinfoghettobound! I don't think Jillian has any idea I am coming, so it will be nice to go to her house to suprise her as well!

Big Ups to the Double U B!

(1 dealt wit fool | Talk shit, sucka!)

Yay-e-Yay [07 Nov 2003|02:39pm]
[ mood | why isn't elated a mood? ]
[ music | Blu Cantrell f/ Sean Paul : Breathe(remix) ]

I just got me a jizzob!

I am now an associate of the eckerd corporation.

I start on Tuesday at 1 pm.

I am so excited I could fucking vomit. I hate not having a job, and now I actually have one. No more sitting at home all day for me. Plus I get to get some loot!

The pay isn't hella by any stretch of the imagination, but 6.25/hr will definitely help our situation.

*screams in happiness*

(3 dealt wit fools | Talk shit, sucka!)

And I miss you... [06 Nov 2003|02:04pm]
[ mood | excited ]
[ music | Everything but the Girl : Missing ]

Wilkes-Barre in like 36 hours!

I am so excited!

(10 dealt wit fools | Talk shit, sucka!)

lil quiz ganked from userinfospuds_sheets [05 Nov 2003|06:29pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

Name Four Bad Habits You Have:
1. Smoking. I guess it is a bad habit, but I like it....so fuck you!
2. Biting my nails.
3. Sleeping in when I am supposed to wake up.
4. Getting so fucking drunk when I do drink. I just can't find my limit.

Name Four Things That You Wish You Had:
1. A huge bag of the funkiest green.
2. A drum machine or sequencer/sampler.
3. A job.
4. More cigarettes. You can never have too many.

Name Four Scents You Love:
1. Funky green is definitely number one. Before you burn it, as well as after.
2. Pine trees.
3. Freshly cut grass.
4. Food being cooked.

Name Four People That Know You the Best:
1. Jillian
2. Patrick
3. Jenn
4. Theresa

Name Four Things You'd Never Wear:
1. Hmmm. I want to say make-up, but I probably would for fun.
2. I really can't think of anything.

Name Four Things You Are Thinking About Now:
1. Mary Jane( but she is always on my mind)
2. Going home to visit, and how crazy it is going to be to try to see everyone I want to. Someone is going to be mad at me, I am sure.
3. How fucking good reggae is.
4. How awesome downloading music is.
(I'm simple minded, just like you dee.)

Name Four Things That You Have Done Today:
1. Went to a temp. service, and quickly retreated. It smelled like a urinal in there, and people were hitting me up for smokes. Drunk, skanky men, with mullets.
2. Talked to Jenn!
3. Ate Ramen noodles for lunch, and just had Mickle Dizzles for dinner.
4. Showered.

Name the Last Four Things You Have Bought:
1. 2 oz. of Pot.
2. Cigarettes.
3. 4 gallons of iced tea.
4. Blank cds.(all of these were purchased before I moved.)

Name Four Bands/Groups Most People Don't Know You Like:
1. The Dead.
2. Seal.
3. Janet/Michael Jackson.
4. Tori Amos(I used to hate her)

Name Four Drinks You Regularly Drink:
1. Coca-Cola Classic
2. Milk
3. Kool-Aid(Well, actually flavor-aid, or drink-aid. Kool-Aid is hella expensive.)
4. Water(I wish I could say Iced Tea, but I haven't had any since I moved. And I am hella excited I get to buy some while I am in PA this weekend.)

First Grade Teacher's Name?
Mrs. Boyle(Which was funny, cause her forehead was always red.)

Last Words You Said:
Do you need to use this? to Farrin about the computer.

Last Song You Sang?
Caught a Lite Sneeze : Tori Amos

Last Person You Hugged?
Jonathan

Last Thing You Laughed At?
Probably Jonathan

Last Time You Said 'I Love You' And Meant It?
Definitely today, once when Jon was going to work, and before I got off the phone with Jenn. Who says I love you, and doesn't mean it?

Last Time You Cried?
I think it was 2 days ago, but it wasn't a bad cry. They were tears of happiness.

What's In Your CD Player?
In my car : A mix with Elton John, and others. In our living room there is Sean Paul : Dutty Rock, Dj Mark Farina : Mushroom Jazz vol. 2, and Eminem : The Eminem Show

What Color Socks Are You Wearing?
White, with the gray on the heels and toes. Hanes Premium, Beeeeeotch!

What's Under Your Bed?
I think it is clean under there.

What Time Did You Wake Up Today?
4:30 am, but went back to bed when I got home at 6. I re-woke up at like 1:45PM.

Current Taste?
McDonalds French Fries

Current Hair?
Shaved on 1.

Current Clothes?
Hanes socks, Nike ball shorts, and a baby blue nike tee.

Current Annoyance?
I am not really annoyed.

Current Longing?
To see my friends, and to smoke some pot.

Current Desktop Picture?
A water pre-set.

Current Worry?
Will we have enough money to go to wilkes-barre.

Current Hate?
America.

Favorite Physical Feature Of The Opposite Sex?
Boobies! And Asses, and vaginas! I love all that nasty stuff!

Last CD You Bought?
God...um...I think it was I really can't remember.

Favorite Place To Be?
In my baby's arms.

Least Favorite Place?
Outside when it is cold.

If You Could Play An Instrument?
The piano.

Favorite Color?
Blue, and green. Shit I am a queer, I love all the colors of the rainbow equally. I mean, isn't that how it should be? Equal?

Do You Believe In An Afterlife?
Yes, it is called death.

How Tall Are You?
5'11

Current Favorite Word/Saying?
How you be durrin?

Favorite Season?
Spring, Summer and Fall. I am not a big fan of winter.

One Person From Your Past You Wish You Could Go Back And Talk To:
Hmm...Abbie, or Flo.

Favorite Day?
Like, of the week...or in my life? I'm a say Friday, cause it kicks off the weekend. And in my life I'd say the day I met Jonathan.

What Is Your Career Going To Be Like?
Hopefully fun.

How Many Kids Do You Want?
At least 1.

Favorite Car?
Dee is after my own heart. Honda Civic. 1991 Hatchback.

A Random Lyric:
"No we're never gonna survive, unless, we get a little...crazy."

Identify Some Of The Things Surrounding Your Computer:
1. Ashtray and cigarettes.
2. Glasses with random shit to drink.
3. A bowl full of nasty candy.
4. books.

(10 dealt wit fools | Talk shit, sucka!)

Baby boy you stay on my mind, fulfill my fantasies. [02 Nov 2003|09:57pm]
[ mood | Loved ]
[ music | Beyonce f/ Sean Paul : Baby Boy ]

I love when it hits me, how truly hit by love I am.

I love to listen to my favorite songs
and put my hand on his leg.
then he embraces my hand with his.
A small squeeze says so much.

I love to look at him
and he looks back at me.
And makes my insides light up.
I get lost in his eyes.

Today, when we were driving, I threw on david gray, and just reveled in my love. I looked at him, his eyes met mine, and I almost cried. He is the sweetest, funniest, most awesome person I have ever met. And I have met a few extraordinary people in my life. Everyday I wake up, excited to face the day, with him by my side.

Yesterday, we went to see his friends new baby, and he was holding him, and it just made me melt. I can't believe I actually found what I was looking for. Life was incomplete, before he typed into mine.

It's funny how our brains work. All I did was read this one journal entry he had, which was a poem of sorts, about NYC, and I knew. I knew this man was exactly what I was looking for. But I played it cool, and decided to not jump to conclusions. But everyday since that day, has been proving me more and more right. When he pulled up in my driveway, and got out of his car, I knew I was in love with him. He just gets me, and I get him.

He is always in my thoughts, even when he is lying right next to me, fast asleep. Even when he is typing away at the computer. When he is at work, or at the stove making some dinner. Not a minute second goes by that he is not. He just makes me so retardedly happy.

He is my inspiration.





I love you baby.

(Talk shit, sucka!)

mary jane is my mistress. [02 Nov 2003|09:42pm]
[ mood | like a dick. ]

I am a scum.

I need a fucking JOB!

For real.

I hate when I make things bad, or feel bad for even making things. I need to get my fucking act together, and start acting right.

Boo. Boo on me.

(4 dealt wit fools | Talk shit, sucka!)

iggnunce has reared her ugly head. [30 Oct 2003|06:43pm]
[ mood | gutted ]
[ music | Jon, Farrin, and Mariela playing GTA Vice City. ]

Well, well, well.

It certainly has been a long time since I updated this bitch.

How y'all be durrin?

I have been...as good as I can be, I suppose. Farrin and Mariela(userinfogypsies66) are here, and it has been fabulous. Besides the fact that we are all gutted, broke bitches, we have been having a grand time. Cool people totally make up for not having money, and not doing anything.

I know I wanna say more, but I got to drop off kids. ;)

I hope everyone is well, since I haven't really heard from anyone, in forever.

<3<3<3

(6 dealt wit fools | Talk shit, sucka!)

random thoughts [22 Oct 2003|12:23pm]
[ mood | good ]
[ music | The Beatles : Your Mother Should Know : Alternate Version ]

-Whenever I drink pepsi, and smoke weed, I think of when I was a senior in high school, and I hung out at my boy Rob's house. We would be smoking hella chronic, with his parents downstairs. I would acks this foo for a drink and he'd be all "Go ahead. My parents don't care." Make no mistake about it, we were getting retarded high. I am sure I looked crippled, and foreign, there was no way I was going to his kitchen where his parents were, by myself for a drink. A drink none-the-less. Of course I need a drink, me and your son are upstairs smoking enough weed to tranquilize a small animal for a few hours. A few times his mom told us to chill, 'cause the smoke was billowing down the stairs, and making the living room reek. And an even more memorable time, his little brother who is like 5 or some shit, wanted to hang out with "wobby", but we had just got donw toking like a blunt or some shit. Anyway, his mom apparently didn't know, and told rob to let him in. Within minutes, matty was obviously stoned with a contact buzz. Having a 5 year old stoned with a contact buzz is not fucking fun.

-Big ups to my W-B crew, even if we are a little scattered, we still the shit! Props to userinfosilvercivic98ex, userinfoghettobound, userinfofunkitreez, userinfofreekspink, userinfofreekdiez2nite, userinfojillibeans, userinfononameforjanet, and userinfomebehindmyself. Y'all rawk my sawks, fo' real.

-I got papers to fill out for copies of my birth certificate, and my social security card. I can probably just ask my mom to mail my b.c. But then I will have to tell her I lost my wallet, and I am just kinda embarassed. I always lose shit, and if anyone knows that it is my mom, but it doesn't make me feel any less stupid. So I'll probably suck it up, and just ask her. I am sure it will take less time that way.

-Jon's friend's userinfogypsies66 are supposed to come here today. I talked to Farrin(if it was Mariela i'm sorry, it is this short-term memory shit..) on the phone yesterday, and she seemed mad cool. I can't wait to meet them.

-The house is kind of messy. I should probably stop typing up this entry and clean.

-I have had fruity loops for a couple weeks, and I still haven't produced a thing. I am feeling somewhat uninspired.

-Matt burned me an album wrap of The Beatles Magical Mystery Tour alternate version. It is fucked up and weird. I haven't listened to it enough to know all the differences, but right now, it kind of seems like it is just missing some things, which makes other things clearer to hear. There are some crazy vocal samples up in it. Definitely about acid. Magical mystery tour, come on.

-I'm hungry.

-I really need my cable for my camera. I ain't trying to buy a new one. Jill needs to mail that shit to me for real. I know you got a few dollars! She probably ain't even gonna read this.

-Emails from friends are great.

-Calls from Jon are great, too. <3<3<3

Alright. I'm a go, 'cause I need some food up in this bitch. Frank's and beans, here I come.

(Talk shit, sucka!)

moral story, more importantly evolving [21 Oct 2003|04:17pm]
[ mood | happy ]
[ music | Jason Mraz : You and I Both ]

Was it you who spoke the words that things would happen but not to me

Oh things are gonna happen naturally

And taking your advice I'm looking on the bright side

And balancing the whole thing

But often times those words get tangled up in lines

And the bright lights turn to night

Until the dawn it brings

A little bird who'll sing about the magic that was you and me



Cause you and I both loved

What you and I spoke of

What you and I spoke of

Others only dream of the love that I love



See I'm all about them words

Over numbers, unencumbered numbered words

Hundreds of pages, pages, pages forwards

More words then I had ever heard and I feel so alive

Now you and I, you and I

Not so little you and I anymore

And with this silence brings a moral story

more importantly evolving is the glory of a boy



you and I both loved what you and I spoke of

and others just read of and if you could see now

well I'm almost finally out of



and it's okay if you have to go away

just remember the telephone works both ways

and if I never ever hear it ring

if nothing else I'll think the bells inside

have finally found you someone else and that's okay

cause I'll remember everything you sang



you and I both loved what you and I spoke of

and others just read of and if you could see now

well I'm almost finally out of words.

(5 dealt wit fools | Talk shit, sucka!)

where my job at? [20 Oct 2003|12:01pm]
[ mood | frustrated ]
[ music | Sneaker Pimps : Po ]

When shit sucks...it just keeps sucking. Like a snowball effect.

Well, we are hella crazy broke. I borrowed money from my uncle for my speeding ticket(which didn't get paid), and we still ain't got no cash.

On top of all that, I can't find my wallet, which means, even if someone wanted to hire me, I couldn't prove I am who I applied as. Plus, I was going to hit up Labor Ready this week, but I also can't do that without positive id. I called the McDonalds we were at, that I last remember having it(which was on thursday), but they ain't even trying to answer their phone.

I'm a search the house here in a minute, and hopefully it will turn up. I need to get a goddamned job.

(Talk shit, sucka!)

bored [18 Oct 2003|12:17am]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | Nick Warren : Amsterdam cd 1 ]

I wish someone was online that I could chat with.

(3 dealt wit fools | Talk shit, sucka!)

cryptic funk, but i know what she be sayin.... [17 Oct 2003|03:53pm]
[ mood | amused ]
[ music | Pink Floyd : The Great Gig in the Sky ]

StiLLGeusie: i like not smoking as much...i get so high
Drfunki202: mmmmmmmm
Drfunki202: iwant soome...were supposed to goto illa for hedro wilsons
StiLLGeusie: hehehe
Drfunki202: me to...i barely be smokin anymore man
StiLLGeusie: I totally understood that sentence...which is crazy
Drfunki202: lol

(2 dealt wit fools | Talk shit, sucka!)

I wear this fucking mask... [17 Oct 2003|02:24am]
[ mood | high ]

How about my bad-ass user icon.

I hope manson doesn't mind that I borrowed it from his site.

I think his paintings are fucking rad, and sometimes he uses weird shit, like absinthe and blood to create with.

Check it out....http://www.marilynmansonartworkonline.com/mm.cgi

(Talk shit, sucka!)

Huh? [17 Oct 2003|02:21am]
[ mood | roxied ]
[ music | DJ Mark Farina : Mushroom Jazz 1 ]

I am totally spacin on what to write now, right now.

I know I wanna get some shit down, but I just can't think.

(Talk shit, sucka!)

please forgive me...if I look a little strange.... [16 Oct 2003|02:59pm]
[ mood | bodacious ]
[ music | Mickey : on the 80's show ]

So I am watching this "I love the 80's" show on VH1, and they were doing the year 1982. And they started talking about mullets. You know how they get different celebrities opinions about the stuff that they are talking about? Well, David Gray was one of those guys, and he admitted to having a mullet, and also admitted it was how horrible it looked.

David fucking Gray had a mullet. 10 fucking 90.

That is awesome.

(Talk shit, sucka!)

grrrr. [14 Oct 2003|03:06pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]
[ music | Venus Hum : Lumberjacks ]

I hate when I can't figure out how to work programs.

I feel like such a fucking retard.

I just want some new icons.

Fuck.

(1 dealt wit fool | Talk shit, sucka!)

dorkness [14 Oct 2003|01:15am]
Hey!

One person has a secret crush on me!

I feel validated.

I'm such a nerd.

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