Bushes enjoy Ford's Theatre holiday gala ('Cause He's The Holiday President)

Bushes enjoy Ford's Theatre holiday gala - Yahoo! News

Here's an opening sentence to make you barf:

It might have been 80 degrees outside but it was snowing inside Ford's Theatre on Sunday, where President Bush attended a taping of an ABC holiday program.

Isn't that cute? Shouldn't President Wingding being doing something constructive like working on getting us out of Iraq? National Health Care? Alternative fuels?

Country singer Wynonna opened the show by performing "Winter Wonderland" on a stage decorated with white lights, Christmas trees and a sleigh. She asked Bush if he had done his Christmas shopping yet.

Don't confuse the idiot...it's July. He still has to screw up Independence Day.

The Ford's Theatre gala usually airs July Fourth, but ABC will televise this event in December in an effort to attract broader viewership.

You mean there was nothing political about this...just the desire to attract more idiots to stare slavishly at their TeeVee? Please, this is The Disney Corporation we're talking about here.

Other performers included singers Yolanda Adams, Olivia Newton-John and Jon Secada, comedian Christopher Titus and "Dancing with the Stars" dancers Jonathan Roberts and Karina Smirnoff.

Who are these people? Okay, I recognize Olivia Newton-John, but I really thought she had morphed into A Crazy Cat Lady living in the Hollywood Hills with 137 felines.

Other than the enormous waste of resources and energy to produce such drivel, you know what's truly sad about this "non-event?" Millions of Mericans will watch it. And enjoy it. They'll come home after hours upon hours of zealous shopping ("We just have to find the perfect gift for your brother this year!"), exhausted but radiant in the Holy Glow of Consumption, and gather as a Family in front of their centerpiece, the 89 Inch Widescreen TeeVee. They might have even stopped in at The Colonel's for a Sixty Piece Bucket of Extra Crunchy, along with the Keg of Mashed and the Tub of Slaw ('cause who really wants to cook after all that exhilarating shopping). And they'll enjoy this shit.

Oh and no invoking the ghost of John Wilkes Booth-it is a ThoughtCrime.

Unsolicited Advice

The case of the missing white woman has been solved and true to form, the husband/boyfriend
has been arrested and been charged with a double murder.

Living in the Bay Area, it was impossible to escape the Scott and Laci Peterson Epic Tragedy as it unfolded in an hourly sideshow of media carnage. And the public just loved every minute of it.

Being older and wiser now, I would like to dispense some advice to the men of this country. I realized at a very early age (17 or 18) that I had absolutely no desire to have children and thus be a parent. Lots of reasons behind this realization and they include: 1) I don't particularly like children. I don't enjoy their company, so why would I want to subject myself to non-stop involvement with something I don't enjoy. 2) I really, really like my freedom. I have never had the desire to make a commitment of such permanence as parenthood would require. Call it selfish, but I enjoy my time being my own. 3) I don't particularly like people so why would I want to make more of them?

But enough about me. Once again we probably have a case of a man who just couldn't handle the idea of parenthood and all that it entailed...so he flips out and murders his girlfriend/wife and the baby. Guys, you don't have to do this! This is not a viable option. It is horribly destructive and there is no turning back once the deed is done. This is not a video game; there is no "do over" button. There were many opportunities for you to get out before it went this far.

Any two idiots with the properly functioning equipment can produce a child. Just go to a family themed restaurant on a Saturday night if you need proof of this premise. You are not special or unique because you can have a child. Humans have been doing this since the dawn of our species-that is why there are so damn many of us. The world/country is not running out of citizens. You are not repopulating the planet after an apocalypse. Look around you: there are over six billion people on this planet and it is painfully obvious to see how well we are all getting along. If you think your parents or other family members are going to be disappointed by you electing not to reproduce, try to imagine their disappointment when you are arrested for the murder of your wife/girlfriend...they'll get over the first and if not, fuck 'em. If all of your friends and siblings are having children, do not succumb to peer pressure. This is a human life we are discussing not a 42" flat screen TV. You do not have to "keep up with the Jones" on this score.

Let's start at the beginning. Ask yourself: Do I really want to be a father and am I ready to accept ALL that it entails? Ask this many times of yourself. Check your answer. Run your answer by your friends, your spiritual advisor. Some things to consider:Do you enjoy getting a full night's sleep? You won't be getting much for the next 17 or so years. Does the idea of giving up the sports car for a family vehicle (van or SUV) produce a burning sensation in your gut? Do you understand just how intimately involved you will be with the Disney Corporation for at least 10 or 12 years (do you understand how much of your paycheck will be going to them and their products?) ? How do you feel knowing that it will be nearly impossible for you to watch any adult oriented (I don't mean pornography...) movies or programs for the next sixteen or so years...oh sure, you can put them on after you put the kids to bed, but realistically, are you going to be able to stay awake? These are just a few of the multitude of changes you will have to face it you want to be a parent. Look hard at them and don't blink.

Back when I drunkenly careened from relationship to relationship, I made a point of announcing that I was not interested in having children. Sure, it was the kiss of death to several potential relationships, but I had no business being with someone whose ultimate aim was to have a family. Why should we waste each other's time? If that's what you really want, go for it, but you need not involve me. You'll find what you're looking for...

Wear a condom. Insist on contraception on both sides. It only takes one microscopic zygote to change everything. CHANGE EVERYTHING...as in EVERYTHING CHANGES. If you really have issues about becoming a father by accident, get a vasectomy.

And if you find yourself becoming a father and you are having grave reservations about the prospect, do not kill the mother and child. Get a lawyer. Move out of the house. Move across town. Move out of the state if necessary. But don't harm anyone. Have your lawyer handle all the affairs. Yes, there will be lots of tears. Angry phone calls. Unpleasant letters. Hell, her parents may even show up at your front door. Call your lawyer. Make all the satisfactory financial arrangements. Do not harm anyone. You can always get involved later, but do not harm anyone.

Let's Have Some Fun

Salvage (link in the title) at Hairy Fish Nuts is hoping to get a "date" with Debbie. Help him out.
Pass this image on.

Overheard Yesterday

while I sitting having a smoke in the quad of the campus where I am employed. A Pretty Young Thing walks by chatting on her cell phone. "I can't be a Flakey McFlakester" she says without even a hint of sarcasm or, for that matter, even a degree of remorse over such an utterance.

Here's the scary part...odds on that she will breed within the coming decade.

Warning

I'm sitting on a bunch of anger (nasty, hostile stuff) and I'm gonna post it and I don't care how unpopular it makes me.

Four Years

The CultureGhost has been a blog for four years now.

The actual day was the 14th...I forgot...so sue me.

New Tattoo

Anyone recognize it? (Sorry about the poor image quality...captured the image from the bathroom mirror and the balm is reflecting the flash). Mimus Pauly will be absolutely horrified about my choice for tattoos.

Damn! I'm Sorry I Missed This!

Gorilla Run 2007 - Home

I actually have my own gorilla suit...doesn't everyone?

Friday Cat Blogging (Heat Wave Edition)

The two rag dolls attempt to get comfortable during another 95+ degree day.

Republicans Aren't Born...They Chew On Toys

ABC News: Engine Trouble! 1.5 Million Thomas Toys Recalled

The Return of Two Day Late Cat Blogging

Bug looking regal while taking shelter from the afternoon sun.

He's Back

At Last! A Museum For Dull, Drab, Small Minded People of No Consequence.

Really Big Pharma

PhotoShop Lessons for The Day

Rudy smiling.
Rummy exiting
The Decider doing something....


What happens when 1) you are teaching yourself more about PhotoShop CS2; 2)it's the end of the semster and you have nothing to do; 3) you are a government employee squandering the taxpayers' dollars and feel absolutely no remorse about it.