The end of the year as we know it.

A break is not a break if you have to keep waking up at 6 to get your kids off to school. Thus, my break will not truly break until tomorrow morning, when my kids hopefully make themselves breakfast and let me sleep in a little.

And then, the shopping...

I was feeling super disoriented, then looked at last year's archives and realized I felt this way last year, too. Note to MB of 2012: you will not get extra work done over winter break. No extra reading, editing, junk drawers, painting, edgy and comic novel written, etc. Don't even try.

I still don't know what day it is.

It hit me that AWP isn't super far away.

I need to write my panel paper!

I can't seem to read The Cat's Table at any time when I'm not semi-comatose, so my reading has slowed down like everything else. So far it's not making me break through the wall of tired.

Speaking of which, it's time to call it a night.

Chainbreaker.

Around this time of year I tend to issue challenges such as:

I will write three new poems before the new year.

Will you write three new poems before the new year?

Ideally, I'll write more than three poems before the new year, but it's hard to know how exciting this break will or won't be.

I just wrote a new poem. I've been averaging one poem every 1.5 weeks. That is not very good, for me.

I sat down this afternoon to write one of the more unpleasant poems of this book. And then I ended up making it nice.

Stockholm Syndrome by Poem.

Whatever. I'll take it.

Fall 2011 semester is done. I'm finishing up rec letters and some editorial projects, and then it's all snowmen and snow ma'ams and popcorn and laziness. And BOR typesetting. And, hopefully, new poems.

yes + no

It's been raining all day, but this time last year we had snow. I wrote a new poem today, organized some existing poems, punched holes in some existing poems, and upbraided myself a little (sometimes I think I write silly poems because I don't like writing somber ones, and right now I am writing kind of a non-funny series of poems, but some of them are humorous, only not the one I wrote today).

Classes are done for the year, but grading is not. Just getting started on a new poetics project. Wondering why there's so much damn laundry in my house all the time. Glad I made the cat stay indoors today.

Homestretching.

This blog post is my reward for finishing the last of my Fall 2011 annotations, and my Fall 2011 papers grading. This blog post, and a little chocolate too. Now I dive ahead into the last week of classes. Please know that my stairs are not filthy, as they appear above. I took this photo in the dark. That's a shadow-stair, not a filth-stair. Henri was obviously not pleased that I had turned on the dishwasher. I think that's what she's lamenting in the photo.

There is not much new to report. I am writing a lot of recommendation letters. Managing my daughter's fourth grade basketball career. Losing at fantasy football. Reading fiction, not writing poems. Hopefully the latter part of that sentence will change once the semester is officially done. Our weather is rainy and non-cold right now. Every day I wonder when the snow is going to start.

Nopoember

Dang, y'all. I am totally uninspired lately. I had to force myself to take some pictures this week. I think I've only written one poem this month so far, a crappy one to prove to myself that I can indeed still write poems on my new laptop.

I ended up feeling strangely sentimental about surrendering my old laptop for this new one. After all, I'd written both Saint Monica and O Holy Insurgency on it, not to mention my new coin-operated manuscript, and my new risk management manuscript, and another project I have in the oven. I also used that old hunk of junk to typeset numerous issues of Barn Owl Review, and to edit and paste together all the essays and foreword for The Monkey & the Wrench. It was hard to say goodbye at first. But I'm hoping that the new laptop has even more awesomeness potential. It does seem a lot more reliable, for one. Now I just need the inspiration. Insert wild, cackling laugh here.

I found this post by Julianna Baggott to ring so true to my life, especially in terms of writing and not writing. I know that the not writing is necessary to the writing, but it's so uncomfortable to me. I feel like a machine. This machine does get a lot of student poems annotated and rec letters written and laundry folded, but it doesn't make poems. I am going to try to look around a little more this week, at the very least. I am hoping for one poem by next Friday.

Weather over/under.

Universe, please accept today's offering of moderate laziness as recompense and allow me to wake up tomorrow okay enough to function. This message is being conveyed upon the heels of Nyquil, which will surely catch me in a few minutes. I apologize, here and publicly, for being so pleased with myself for making it to Week 11 without so much as a sniffle. I may have even smirked at the chorus of coughs resounding down the hall at work. I thought I was going to outrun it this year, but alas.

Currently hoping to beat this all down and not get really sick, as I have a tendency to do. Tried to watch as much football as possible today. I could really use a productive week. If you're out there, universe, thank you for your kind attention.

Artifacting.

November is here! I'm so glad, but not sure why. I have been cold almost every day. Like, waking up in the middle of the night cold, and wearing two sweaters cold. Otherwise healthy and functional, however. Maybe it's the new freezeicism. I don't know.

This evening John Gallaher and G.C. Waldrep read at UA. I'm excited to hear them. It's always fun welcoming writers to Akron.

I printed out our November calendar and it looks deliciously empty. I am counting down to winter break and planning a few home improvement projects, like painting, which is way overdue. I may even replace the mead hall chic hardware on the kitchen cabinets, if I am ambitious enough.

The only other news is that I fear I have become addicted to sending poems out. I've been doing it almost every day. I took special joy in sending out a number of print submissions. The downside to all this is that I haven't been writing much.

As in the past, I have found a bunch of poems that I forgot about after writing. Some of those are getting slapped around a bit and then put into envelopes and mailed away.

Tiny panics.

I don't have any large things to report except that I've had a nice handful of poems (many very new) picked up by several magazines that I love, and this has made me giddy. It has also made me totally dismantle most recent manuscript and wonder what I should be doing with all these poems (hacked down by 26 pages, etc). I'm not sure I'll have time to ponder this until winter break.

We've had some very rainy weather in Ohio. It's making me think about winter, which makes me think I better get the cupboards stocked up. Many of this week's plans derailed by being home with a sick kid, who is thankfully better, and I guess I welcomed the break from reality after all.

I may have written a new poem or two since I last posted. Trying to be diligent about sending work out. Trying to find a journal or two that likes funny poems. Realizing that liking some of my poems is, um, an acquired taste.

Wild and _____________.

Akron is a great place to be right now because SUMMER is BACK. Sure, it gets pretty cold at night, but who doesn't love a good pair of pajamas? And yes, the leaves are at their peak, but they look much prettier when you don't have a hat pulled down over your eyes and a coat zipped up to your nose.

Above please find this wall-climber we found today. Eric says in the picture it looks like a turd but it is not.

Lately I have had a lot of moments such as: Wow, this glass of water tastes delicious! Or: Just look at this tiny white flower! Or: My cats are so cute, I want to bring them to work with me! Maybe it's just being able to have a little more sunshine than expected for this time of year. I don't know, but I'll take it.

Partydown.

Today is one of those Tuesdays that feels like a Wednesday. But you know what? Who cares, because on the Friday of AWP we're having an amazing offsite reading for Barn Owl Review and Diode.

Barn Owl Review & Diode Offsite Poetry Reading
Friday, March 2nd, 7:00 pm
Fine Arts Building, Curtiss Hall
410 South Michigan Avenue (mere steps from the conference hotel!)
Chicago, IL, USA

Readers:

Jason Bredle * Traci Brimhall * Peter Campion * John Gallaher * Brent Goodman * Matthew Guenette * Rebecca Hazelton * Sandy Longhorn * Erika Meitner * Aimee Nezhukumatathil * Alison Pelegrin * G.C. Waldrep

This is the very first Barn Owl Review offsite reading ever, so we are extra excited, and I have to admit that this lineup make my heart get all a-flutter. So many awesome writers in one place.

In news not of the future, it seems warmer weather is back in Akron this week, and thank the dear lord for that. Several days of bone-chilling cold and rain made it rather difficult to be motivated. Now, sunny skies and temps in the upper 60s are making it rather difficult to be motivated. But I'm catching up nonetheless. It's week seven. I am already pining for the glory of winter break, even if it has the word "winter" in it.

Last-ish splash.

Dear blog, I have not abandoned you. I was in New York! I spent 20 hours in the car with two kids under the age of ten. And I have (obviously) lived to tell about it. But mainly I want to say that September is almost over. I think it should be over. I'm already thinking about November, etc. Anyway, now that the trip is behind us (family wedding, etc) it's all about catching up and moving forward and acting shocked by chilly gusts and orange leaves.

The most exciting part of this week (aside from returning home) was this incredibly insightful review of Saint Monica in The Rumpus. There's nothing quite like perusing the sites you check every day and seeing your own book cover there. I'm incredibly thankful. I am totally going to squeal with glee in front of their table at AWP Chicago.

In other news, while I was out of town the folks at We Who Are About to Die posted this little interview with me about parenting. It's about parenting, but I think the whole "how to write like you're desperate to write, because you are desperate to write" idea applies widely. Cheers to all the folks who checked it out.

I need to post this because soon it's going to be October. I'll neglect the blog less this month, promise. I can report back that I have 16-ish pages of new poems from the new series, so I haven't been spending the whole time filing my nails and dreaming up new recipes for butternut squash.

Night + moves.

Oh dear. This day became incredible hectic, in the "well, I guess I'll leave my desk looking like it's been ransacked" kind of way. Where did that come from, huh?

My poem-writing productivity has slowed a bit this week, but there's still exciting news.

I have some new poems here at Toad. Yeah!

And it has officially been announced that I will be judging two awesome things in the future. I'll be the poetry judge for the 2011 Best of the Net anthology (attention online magazine editors--submissions accepted until 10/31/11). I am also the judge of this year's Mid-American Review James Wright Poetry Award competition, which has a postmark deadline of 10/1/11. That's practically right around the corner!

One thing I can share about judging contests is that my aesthetic is incredibly eclectic. I can honestly say that I like all different kinds of poems. I like dark/chilly poems, and hot love poems, and silly poems, and dark poems that turn into silly love poems. I like lyric poems and narrative poems. I love poems that seem really felt by the author (even if they're funny--sometimes they can be the most moving poems). I'd rather poems take risks and have a few runs in their stockings, rather than being impenetrable in a cold veneer. If that makes any sense. Anyhow, it's an honor to be judging, and I can't wait to read what folks send my way.

On Saturday I'll be reading with the amazing Susan Grimm (who arguably has the best reading voice in all of poetry--downright mesmerizing) at Mac's Backs Books on Coventry, at 7 pm. I'll read some Saint Monica poems, but also a handful of my brand new, hot of the press series that I've been having so much fun with. I hope to see you there, local poetry fans!

Longweekender.

Wow, this long weekend was something else! All of the best things (bestest friends, poetry, beers of quality, curry cauliflower, my writers' group with amazingly inspiring girlfriends, broken things being fixed, new poems even though allegedly "not writing," cooler weather that makes one think about flannel pajamas, two poems accepted by supremely awesome journal, a little relaxation, not doing the stuff supposed to be doing, catching up on laundry, cats that like to walk across your chest while reading, and reading!).

It's hard to believe we're entering week THREE of the semester, and already a day ahead, at that.

My yard is starting to look like a real jungle, and not in a nice way.

I hope the universe doesn't consider this an invitation to throw me yet another curve ball, but I feel as if I am finally getting some things in order and figuring out a workable routine.

It's also not really Sunday night, so I shouldn't have insomnia.

Having some revelations about a new book project!

I'd really like this week to be a good one.

A farewell to August.

Doesn't Lulu Barnes make an imposing shadow? That shadow says, "It's almost September, even though it feels like the middle of summer, and the AC is running, and it's still light when the kids go to bed."

It's a chatty shadow. One of those.

Golly, we're knee-deep into week two, and everything, for the most part, is okay.

The super awesome, independent Akron reading series THE BIG BIG MESS has its latest installment on Friday, featuring Matthew Guenette, Nate Pritts, Adam Fell, and Matt Hart. It's going to be so fantastic.

Don't wear your wool sweater, though, because that place gets a little hot.

In other news, did you know that I write book reviews sometimes? Here's my review of THE TREES THE TREES by Heather Christle, at Read This Awesome Book.

Dear reader, I am looking forward to the long weekend that they say is ahead of us.

I have a batch of student poems to comment on. I somehow, despite major childcare challenges, managed to write well over 40 pages of poems this summer. Life is just where it should be. Please stay that way, life. Thanks.

And just like that...

One minute I was contemplating witchcraft to get rid of ants, and the next I was in the classroom telling students about contemplating witchcraft to get rid of ants, and how that connects (maybe) to the craft of writing poetry.

Yes, this week was hectic. It took me a really long time to line all of those metaphorical cones (see above) up just right. But I did, and here we are.

At this time of year I am always extra thankful that I get to do what I do. I'm also kind of shocked that I get to do what I do, even though I've been here in Akron since 2005. I am very aware of the fact that my 1:2 load is going to be a thing of the past as of next year, when I am no longer program director, so I am trying to enjoy it. Less administration, or rather, NO administration, will be nice.

The Monkey and the Wrench is getting some rather awesome reviews in magazines, including ALA Choice:

As editors of the "Akron Series in Contemporary Poetics," Biddinger and Gallaher have compiled an exceptionally fine sampling of reflections on contemporary American poetry. The first selections are playful, pithy examinations of noteworthy trends; the last section is devoted to ongoing debate in the field on attempts to classify American poets and their work into distinct schools--a debate to some degree launched in Cole Swenson's American Hybrid." A Norton Anthology of New Poetry, ed. by Cole Swensen and David St. John (2009). Less experienced audiences, including lay readers, will find the essays refreshingly clear and the threads of the discussion easy to follow, and they will appreciate the wealth of illustrations and suggested further reading. At the same time, practicing poets and instructors in MFA programs will find the critique of such programs invaluable. Delightful in terms of style, broad and perceptive in subject and treatment, this book is a must-read for those interested in writing poetry. Though not exhaustive in coverage, it represents the current conversations of some of the most prominent writers and critics publishing today. Summing Up: Highly recommended. Upper-division undergraduates through faculty and professionals; general readers.

--C. E. O'Neill, New Mexico State University at Alamogordo

I am so excited to hear what people have to think of the book, especially because we're working on volume 2 in the series right now.

The biggest development of the week: I now have a 4th grader and a KINDERGARTENER. Ray's first day was today. He loved it. Then we went out for Thai food. He didn't want the mild-ish pad thai I ordered for him, and instead ate Eric's spicy vermicelli. I think he is ready for the real world.

First day crack-up.

School: it's back in session! I am only teaching one class this semester (I am on a 1:2 again this year, which will change next year, as I will no longer be directing the MFA program, which, coincidentally, has a nice new website). Anyway, I am teaching an intro to poetry writing workshop, which is one of my favorite classes to teach. It seems like an awesome bunch. Totally odd time of 12:15-1:30, but everyone was still awake and not gnawing on gigantic sandwiches or anything. It was great. Then I went back to my office and got knocked out of my chair by an earthquake.

I sometimes have problems dealing with my blood sugar and thus end up shaky/loopy/vertigo-esque, so I figured I'd had another one of those 120 calorie Lean Cuisines by mistake or something, but then the building was really swaying, and we stood in the doorways and felt queasy. I'm not sure why I am compelled to document this, but it was quite eerie and strange (not to mention the flurry on twitter afterwards, like everyone was getting quaked at the same time). Afterwards I went out and took a bunch of pictures and I'm super happy with them. So thus rests the first day of school 2011. An auspicious start, for sure.