Things Seldom Heard On The Soccer Field

Barbie® doll as Galadriel in The Lord of the Rings:
The Fellowship of the Ring
Originally uploaded by SageE.

But not never heard:

Child (charging toward the net): Gilthoniel! O Elbereth!

Child (running forward with the front line): Ride, Rohirrim!

Child (assisting goalie with a block): Elendil!

Parent (to team parents): Uh, we've been reading The Lord of the Rings...

Competing On The Coolness

After enjoying San Jose Norm Mineta airport's new Space Observer and Dreaming F.I.D.S. artworks, and returning to take in John Wayne Airport's new interactive aquarium wall in Terminal 2's baggage claim:

Child:  Are they trying to beat San Jose with their coolness??

The Modern World

Flying Car
Originally uploaded by Abhishek Awasthi

Child: It would be fun to live in a house on the water, you could have a diving board where you could jump into the ocean.

Parent: Maybe someday when you're older you can live in one.

Child: But those houses won't be there then, it'll be the Modern World.

Parent: What will the Modern World be like?

Child: There will be hovercraft cars that don't run on gasoline, floating homes, houses with rockets coming out of them...

Parent: Anything else?

Child: Well, maybe the houses would stay the same, there'll just be new cars.

Parent: Hovercraft cars?

Child: And podracers. But they won't run on gasoline. They'll run on futuristicky stuff.

Parent: Looking forward to it.

The Hazards Of Being My Kid

Welcome To Bespin! Glad You Stopped By!
Originally uploaded by Andy Ihnatko

My son — who is six — and I were watching TWiT 266 tonight while I was making dinner. Leo came to the ad for TWiT network sponsor Carbonite Pro, and my son's eyes lit up.

Child: Mom! They're talking about Carbonite!

Parent: Yes, they're a cool company that's a sponsor on our network. We use them to back up our computers and keep our stuff safe.

Child: [pauses] ...Do they have a license from George Lucas??

Parent: Good question!

(Turns out they don't need one. But you never know.)

Thinking Big

king and queen of the junk yard
Originally uploaded by iboy_daniel

(Magnets were a big deal at camp this year.)

Child: Mom, can we get one of those big magnets that can lift a car?

Parent: No, I'm afraid that kind of thing is too big to bring to the house.

Child: But we could have it deliverrrred!

Parent: [incomprehensible laughter]

Child: No, really, we can have it delivered!!

Parent: [Reflects that Amazon Prime has its hidden costs.]