Monthly Archives: November 2007

MY MOM THE MUSIC CRITIC

After making me listen to Daughtry on her walkman, my mom goes in on the 2007 American Music Awards: “Chris Brown” [who, after seeing this christmas today, she is now in love with] “is the new Michael Jackson.” “Nicole Scherzinger … Continue reading

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CHRONICLING THE FAMILY VISIT

Mom’s in town and has already described someone wearing too much make-up as looking like “a hooker.” Kevin, meeting her for the first time, described her as “old world meets new world,” which is pretty accurate. My amazing cousins Kelsi … Continue reading

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BARF ALERT

I realize I am late in listening to this whole Trill Fam album (too busy sweating Freeway), but how are muhfukkas gonna have a track called “Materialistic Bitch,” verbally smacking a gold-digging lady, then have a track called “Leave the … Continue reading

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KEEPIN IT IN THE FAMILY

Memo to all Gowanus and Boerum Hill residents, and those Park Slopers who walk down 4th Avenue towards Atlantic to get to the subway: my favorite bodega, on 4th ave and Dean street, closed a few months ago, much to … Continue reading

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STROKE ME STROKE ME

Dudes, Fader homies just posted up this exclusive Strokes film to go along with their 50th issue. I care about that much about the the Strokes and the film is shot in Warholian pseudo-art “no sound, gritty film quality,” (aka … Continue reading

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SOMETIMES I WRITE IN COMPLETE SENTENCES

Mon review del Kellz, the official, readable version. Just jammed it out today.

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AN ANTI-WAR MOVIE, APPROPRIATELY CRAFTED IN CHAOS

Lacking any viable Saturday nite dance-action, me and my man-friend checked out “Southland Tales.” The new film written and directed by Richard “Donnie Darko” Kelly, it notoriously stars the Rock and was booed at Cannes, but last night, it wasn’t … Continue reading

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KELLZ-IAN AWESOMENESS.

R. Kelly’s show tonight was the best arena show I’ve ever seen. The finale was Kells in a white suit with coattails and a grip of frontrow audience folx onstage stepping, singing “Happy People,” then a “Happy People” medley: “This … Continue reading

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ON THE MIC I’M NUMBER ONE. I AM ALSO NUMBER TWO. BECAUSE BITCHES I’M THE SHIT.

This just came on the itunes playlist – holler at early 2007. I’m struck with how smirk-inducingly hot and how unforgivably shitty it is all at once. Did Freeway write Young Hot Rod’s lyrics? Cause there’s some kinna cute barbs … Continue reading

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No Faded Radio b/w Letting Keyshia Go

Yo, there is no Fader radio tonight on account of the Fader dudez are in turkey comas in various cites across the Eastern seaboard, but feel free to listen to last week’s episode, which I have dubbed “Faded radio” on … Continue reading

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