MOM

I had decided to leave Thursday morning after dropping Bella at the kennel. Everything was set except I kept waiting to buy my plane ticket. Something told me to wait. Then at noon I felt I just had to talk to my mom, they held the phone to her ear so I could say my last words to her, she could not speak, just listen. They told me she could go any minute. As it stands she left at 5:10 9/11. I did not make it. My brothers account is that is was peaceful and sweet. A woman came and played the harp. One brother, one niece, her boyfriend and her doctor were there for the passing. I was home talking to her. After, while I was talking to my brothers on the phone my mom turned off my computer. It was on in the other room, there was no loss of power, no storm, but after I got off the phone and knew she had passed I went in to turn the computer off and it was already off. I had told my mother when I talked to her to please visit me and let me know she was okay. I believe that was her. I have been strangely calm, after 3 days of a roller coaster and waiting, the wait is over. My mom is free. I am not sure when we will have the memorial, in the next month I expect and I will be going home. There are a year of firsts ahead of me. Today is the first day without my mom on the earth. It is hard, but I feel her with me and all I can do is put one foot in front of the other. It is strange how the world and time marches forth. Thank you so much for your prayers and love.XOXO

Updates

Thought I should let you all know what was up. It has been a busy week with lots of family phone calls and looking for a pet-sitter. Mom is home and doing very well, the doctors are amazed at how fast she is recovering. My brother R and mom's boyfriend R have provided the rest of the funds I needed to go home. I was able to come up with 400, so I have the pet-sitter and my shuttle costs covered. Yay. I want to thank them very much as well as dear Angela and Lolo and Kj for their purchases on my ESTY site and sweet Jos and Robin and M for their very generous offers. I am making the plane reservations today. It looks like I will be leaving the 13Th and coming back the 21st. I still have not found a pet-sitter, but I am still looking and I have a good friend who does not want to do it (he has little patience and my boys require a lot), but will do it if I don't find anyone by the time I leave. I am waiting to hear from a vet tech and she would be perfect, please pray she can do it!
In other news I have many things going on. My show at Cafe Loka comes down next Friday.
There is a job I may go for, but I don't know enough yet to make any decisions. Or I may come home from my trip and start the long process of planning a move to Oregon. Any of my readers live on the Oregon coast? Speaking of the coast, mom and R and I are going for a few days when I am home! Yay! Double Yay! I miss the sea so much which is one reason I want to move there, also it is only two hours from my family and I would be closer if they needed me and be able to visit more often. I have not decided yet what I will do. My head spins with all the stuff I have to think about.
And for those of you, Nolly, Angela, who are interested in my journey with the book"Busting Loose from the Money Game" , "the process" I do in the book has been a God send through all this crisis.
Okay, this is a much needed day off, so I am laying around, reading and watching my beloved "Lost" tapes. No more painting until I return home, unless I just can't help myself, which could happen :-).
Thanks again to those who prayed, thought good thoughts and helped with your cash. I love you all, each and everyone. Happy Saturday. xoxo

Updates

First, thank you all for your prayers, they are very much appreciated. My mom is much improved, she had slurred speech and could not use her left hand, but she speaks much better now and has worked hard to get her left hand working, and she can walk, which was a concern.
She is out of ICU. I still don't know when she will be home, but should have the answer soon.
I have not sold any paintings (yet) (see post below for details), but dear Angela bought two of my wall hangings, so that it $27 for me and $3 for the sea turtles, Thank you Angela! Every little bit helps. I also wanted you to know that if any of you want a painting, but just can't swing the price, let me know (email me) and perhaps we can work out something, I am willing to go down in price if you really want one.
Blessings and Happy Sunday! XOXO

S.O.S

(Click to enlarge)

Okay, here is the deal. I was all set to have a little painting sale (see above paintings) and I was going to give 75% of the money to these lovely people who are helping with the animal rescue

in the Gulf. Then last night I got a call that my mom has had a stroke, and now I need some money to get home. My mom is okay, but she is going to be needing me when she gets home which could be weeks or longer, we just don't know much yet, she has my brothers and her boyfriend, but sometimes you just need your daughter. My mom has had a very rough couple years and I have not been home for over a year, it is time. I will be needing an A+ pet sitter first and then I will find a way to make it happen. Every little bit of cash helps. I am going to need about a thousand dollars to make it there.

The top painting is 8"x 8", Venetian plaster and collage and pigment: $125+12.00 for shipping

Next down is 8"x 8", Venetian plaster and pigment:$225 + 15.00 for shipping

3rd down is 5"x 5", Venetian plaster and acrylics: $99 + 10.00 for shipping

Last one is 8"x 8", Venetian plaster and acrylics: $175 + 12.00 for shipping, I set the prices for less than half than what they would be at the gallery (galleries take 50%, a lot of people don't know that) and also the price reflects the amount of time I have in each one. I will give half of all the sales here. The rest will fund my trip. If any of you are interested please leave a comment or email me. I can do it through pay pal or take a check and if you want more photos or more info I can email you. Also know that if you don't want a painting that is okay too, but I would ask for your prayers and good thoughts. I will keep you all updated.

P.S. If you buy anything in my ETSY shop in the next week I will give 10% to http://www.imms.org/

P.S.S. I was inspired by Lori!

Blessings. Love. XOXO

ALICE!

I have been waiting for months for Tim Burton's "Alice in Wonderland", in 3D no less.

First, it looks luscious and yummy and second, the mad hatter is played by Johnny Depp.

It opens tomorrow and I already have my tickets. A friend and I will be the first there.

I will give you my review this weekend. FUN!

In more serious, not so fun news, please continue saying prayers and thinking good thoughts for Renee, who continues to battle cancer.

Also my dear mom is doing well as far as healing and such, but she is having a lot of pain, so prayers and good thoughts for her would be much appreciated too.

Happy Thursday. XOXOXO

Collagraphs

This is my very first collagraph I learned how to do from Sukipoet. I don't think it is very good, but okay for a first time. The last photo is the plate I made with file folder paper and cardboard and glue. It was very fun and I am looking forward to doing more (better ones).

In other news mom is going home today, she still cannot walk, but she can get in and out of her wheel chair and move around a bit, her spirits are better now that she is leaving the assisted living.

Sending many prayers out for Haiti and for my dear sweet Renee and family.

Happy Thursday. XOXO ♥

The Gift of Nothing

The photo of my cat Max and dog Zeus has nothing to do with the post, just thought it was adorable and wanted to share :-). Today is my first day off in 7 days and I am giving myself the gift of doing nothing today. I say nothing, but I will actually be playing, which means going back to bed with my book (The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, by Stieg Larson). Making myself a yummy breakfast of hot chocolate and tangerines and toast. I will also be trying out a printing technique I learned from Sukipoet, just for fun. Then later, a friend has loaned me some early Hitchcock films, I have loved Hitchcock since I was six (I was an odd child), so I am looking forward to watching them. What I will not be doing is anything on my long to do list :-). Mom is in better spirits and is walking a little. Tiny, baby steps each day. Keep those prayers coming. Thank you! May you all have a wonderful, blessed day. XOXO ♥ ♥ ♥ P.S. In keeping with my plan to create more bliss in my life, I am joining Lynn's new traveling art book. All who sign up will do a page and then send it on. If you wish to join the fun go visit Lynn's blog and leave her a comment letting her know.

Looking for Bliss

Bliss-1. Supreme happiness;utter j0y or contentment 2. heaven, paradise.
I seem to have misplaced my bliss somewhere. My joy is hiding, but I am determined to seek it and find it and live it again. I welcome this challenge. To be joyful even when things are not going well, this is my lifelong goal. To not be at the mercy of events or people. To have and hold and always keep a big vat of joy in my heart no matter what occurs. Yes, it is easier said than done, but I know it is possible and I am gonna do it :-). Things I will be doing this next week to help restore my bliss:
Going to a big party tomorrow night.
Going to see Avatar.
Working on my big painting (finally after months)
Making valentine's out of porcelain.
Running with my dog, Zeus.
Hot chocolate and maybe even cake :-).
Meditating and staying in the moment.
Blogging and hearing from my bloggy buddies.
I will be giving reports of my success's all week. Also I want to ask for continued prayers for mom, she is in assisted living, but really hates it and cannot walk and is feeling badly about it all. She needs a dose of bliss too.
Happy Friday. XOXO ♥

My First Successful Porcelain Cup

This is my first successful porcelain cup. Thought I would share. If any of you are interested it is for sale on my ETSY shop. Let me know what you think.

Mom is doing better and is starting the healing journey. Thank you all so much for your prayers and good thoughts. XOXO

Another SOS

Yesterday my mom had another fall. She is in the hospital and will be getting pins put in her leg in the next day or two. She is okay, but in a great deal of pain. Her recovery time from the surgery is estimated at 3 months. Please think good thoughts or pray to any God you choose, I appreciate you all so much. xoxo

What I Learned Last Week

Life can be rough, it can suck and it can break your heart, but even at it's worst there is always a bit of magic to be found. On my worst day with Spike, the day I thought he was gone, I said to myself "When are you going to LIVE how you BELIEVE?". That thought turned me around.
It has been my mantra. I believe that all things happen for a reason, I believe I can trust the process. I am taking all things that come to me as a gift. Some days I do better than others, but I am learning.
Spike is home and happy. I have to give him the fluids twice a week and the vet and I decided to not risk his life with the surgery to take his stone out. Everyday I have with him is a precious gift
and I see it always has been. Same for everything. I wish that I could always see this, when I am in a hurry or stressed, I often miss all the treasures around me.
I had a lovely gift arrive yesterday in the form Of blogger friend Kj. We had little time, but made good use of it. I will share photos of the meeting soon and (gasp) you may just get to see what I look like :-).
Another gift was the wonderful Kate P, blogger, and art supporter who bought stuff on my ETSY site and helped so much to boost my moral. Thank you Kate P!
Today is my mom's birthday- HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!!!! Love you.
Have a great Tuesday everyone. XOXO

More Life

I am as busy as a bee these days. I am cleaning places in my house that have not been cleaned for a year :-). It feels good. Today is the final clean before my mom comes. I also have a new little problem. A sweet cat has come to me for help. I can't let her in the house as my cat Max will not tolerate a new cat, so I made a box home for her on my porch and I am feeding her and looking for a home she will be happy in. I believe she is an abused kitty. The thing about Taos is that it is a beautiful place, but like all places there is a very dark side. The treatment of animals here is beyond cruel. Please pray I find her a home with lots of love, she deserves it. This is going to be a very busy time with work and my mom and brother and his wife, I won't have much time to post or visit, but know that I am thinking of you and will catch up when I can. Also I have a new blog friend who I am becoming very fond of indeed and she has real life and death health issues and members of her family are also in much need of your prayers and good thoughts. Her name is Renee, please send up a prayer for her and her family. And since we are praying send one up for M.Kate and her family as well for good health. Let me throw in a couple more :-). Keep sending good thoughts up for my cousin R and I have an old friend (we'll call her R too)who is feeling very lonely. Okay you all get halos!
Thank you! Have a most wonderful week! See you when I see you :-). XOXO

Random thoughts and updates

Blissful Saturday. Home from an early run and after a yummy breakfast I am going to do a bit of painting. I started two new paintings yesterday and so far I like them a lot. Later I am going to an art show to be social then back home for more painting. I have been working a lot and when I do that the art suffers, so it feels good to be back into the swing of it. Bliss and joy abound.
An update on my mom: She is home and slowly getting better, she can walk, but it hurts, so she is using a wheelchair and walker to get around. Her goal is to be able to travel and come see me in 4 or 5 weeks.
Update on my cousin R: He is the bravest person I know. He is traveling and living his life to the fullest and if you talked to him you would never know he has cancer. According to the doctors, he has 6 months to live, but you just can't know for sure.
Have a most wonderful weekend, do fun stuff, okay. Tell me what's new? XOXO

Award time!

I received the biggest heart award from the wonderful KJ and the lovely blog award from the talented Gypsy Moon. Thank you both so much for thinking of me. A girl can't have too many awards!

I pass the biggest heart award to:

Willowtree

AnnieH

Kelly

And I pass on the lovely blog award to:

Erin Davis

Melanie

Yoli

I know many of you already have these awards, but if you don't please snag them here, I love you all and each of you deserves both the awards.

Updates: My cousin is very brave and will be spending his time traveling and seeing people he loves. He is amazing and I send him loads of love. Mom is having a hard time in assisted living, please keep her in your prayers. I am off to paint (things are going better now that I am relaxed about it :-). Happy weekend! XOXO

Updates and a thank you to everyone

Thank you all who have been praying for my mom and cousin.
All the lovely comments are very appreciated. Mom is being
moved to assisted living today and will be able to go home after
she is able to walk better. She has a lot of pain, but she is getting
better everyday and I am very grateful for that.
I have been sitting with my sadness and anxiousness instead of
pushing it away and when I do that, it moves swiftly through me
and I am able to let go of worry. Still watching the funny movies too :-).
I have finished Erin's painting and will show photos after she receives it.
I have not touched clay for a few weeks and have been dreaming of it
nearly every night, so today I am going to follow my bliss and make
something, a mug, a bowl, not sure yet.
The two bowls I showed you a couple weeks ago have found homes!
One has made it's way to Diantha and one is on it's way to the UK
in a trade with Melanie. This makes me happier than I can express :-).
I am off to play. Keep the prayers coming. Love you, XOXO

Call for positive thoughts and prayers

This has been a rough week, not for me, but for some people that I love. My mom who is still recovering from surgery and a bout with lung cancer, fell yesterday, tripped on a curb and went unconscious. Luckily there was a doctor in the parking lot and she was rushed to the hospital.
She has a bad gash on her forehead, a black eye and a fractured pelvis. This fall may set her recovery back a bit and while she should be fine, I know she is in pain and not very happy right now, so some good thoughts and well wishes would make her feel a bit better.
Also an update on a relative, I don't want to say much because they may not have told others about it yet, but they had cancer and it was removed, but it has come back and likely won't be leaving this time, please send a prayer out for them.
All of this makes me anxious and sad, but I am trying to go to my calm, happy place and one way I do that is I rent funny movies and do fun things and I meditate. What do you do when you need a break from some of the world weary things that happen? Thanks for your good thoughts.
XOXO

Now on my Etsy site

I know you have already seen this, but I had to show you the professional photo :-).

Mom went home yesterday! YAY. It makes me more than happy. Time is flying and I will get back here with a real post soon. Happy Saturday. XOXO

Vote on your favorite...

I finally have some finished mugs to show you. Some of you may remember I showed pictures of these just after I made them, now they are done! The top two are gifts for friends and I am thinking of putting the bottom, green one on my Etsy site. I Will make another of the black and white ones for my site, but I want to know which of the two Black and white is your favorite, or if you prefer the green one? Just curious.

I am very happy this evening! I heard a rumor my mom will get to go home Friday, but it has not been confirmed. NOTHING would make me happier than that :-).

P.S. I keep forgetting to tell you that all my ceramic pieces are hand built, from the bottom up :-). No wheel was used in making them.

Potters will know this, but some of you may not.

All Consuming

I have been a bad blogger lately, but I have a good excuse: I have been working on my book and I have to say I may actually finish it :-). I also completed the best bowl I have made yet, I will share photos soon. Spring has inspired in me a need to do. I have a list a mile long of things I want to do this month:
1.Paint my bedroom sea blue.
2.Clean my yard.
3.Finish the book.
4.De clutter my house.
5. Do collage, learn how to use my scanner and make more ceramics.
6. Cut my hair.
That is my list so far, it grows everyday :-).
How has Spring inspired you?
P.S. Mom is still in hospital, but she continues to improve.
Thank you for your good thoughts and prayers.

Random thoughts...

First, thank you for all your prayers and good thoughts for my mom. They have moved her out of ICU and while she is still a bit loopy from the pain medication, she is doing better everyday.
Lately I have been thinking about life and bliss and art. You all know my days have been cut from my job and I am seriously thinking about NOT looking for more work. I am not getting any younger and I want to do my art, I need to do it and the reason I am so far behind in my career as an artist is because I have always worked a full time job as well. Something has to change or I will still be working at 70 and no where near where I want to be. I was saying to the Universe yesterday, "Well if I sold some art I would feel more trusting of doing art full time" My little voice (yes, I have a little voice and it is always right :-) said back "You have to trust, first".
So, here I go into the void :-). What are your thoughts on this? Your experiences? I am off to do ceramics :-). Happy weekend. XOXO