"Dammit Dolls"

It's been a while! But you know I am the G.O.A.T. gift giver and I have so many exciting things I am passing out this year. I don't really share gift finds until AFTER Christmas because I want my friends and family members to KNOW I came up with these ideas on my own. I didn't copy someone. EVEN THOUGH, SOMEONE does have this and others will receive it. Don't worry, Valentine's Day is 64 days away.  Now, you will have ideas.

I have always eyeballed these "dammit dolls".  I hate the word, but I love the concept of throwing a doll instead of punching a wall.

I am grabbing the food "dammit doll" for Lilah's Christmas stocking.  She is on a health journey and if and when she splurges, I know she will want this doll to take out all of her frustrations on.  LOL!

Shop these links:

Anatomy "Dammit Doll", Perfect for a med student or doctor, Shop Here!

Food "Dammit Doll", perfect for a gym rat or fitness guru, Shop Here!

Miscellaneous "Dammit Dolls".  You don't get to pick your pattern though.  Shop Here!

Here's to hoping this helps eliminate some frustrations in your life. LOL! Let me know if you purchased one and thank you in advance for using my shopping links!

Pee-litical Humor!!!!

Tyson officially graduated last night.  I presented him with a fun, practical, and intentional DIY gift, which included, but was certainly NOT limited to this HYSTERICAL toilet bowl night light.  Enjoy your piss as you pee on those you'd NEVER vote for. 

Back-To-Work....

We interrupt our back to school photos, ALREADY, to announce that Darren has been working 7,387 days at Bolling Steel! LOL! I knew he'd be envious of all the signs everyone was holding, so I made him one too!

#MundainTrain #GroundhogDay #AdultLife #BackToSchool #PureComedy #HusbandGoals

Happy Father's Day! ~ 2019

One of my favorite holidays to celebrate with my little tribe is Father's Day because my children truly have one of the best men this world could offer them. I believe he is "THE BEST"! And he deserves a special day, set aside, just for him.

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do!

It was a TOTALLY random elf creation.  

Hershey Squirts And Lemonade Kisses!

On day #2, we had some potty issues.  What the heck did Napoleon eat?? We believe he might have gotten his hands on some of that contaminated romaine lettuce. He had such a horrible tummy ache or at least that's the story we are sticking to.

Tums and pepto bismol was involved.  

How cute is our elves christmas TP (toilet paper)?

Pee Lemonade? LOL!

"I had diarrhea." What a disaster! What a complete disaster!! BUT, thankfully this was just Hershey's chocolate, from my perspective anyway.

I have a funny side story about this.  Because this bathroom is in the basement, I failed to clean the toilet.  What happened was, I retrieve the elves for the NEXT day, the following morning, and I grabbed all that I could, like the pepto and tums, BUT I thought I would remember to clean the chocolate off the toilet and I didn't. The following week my cleaners came.  I always look over their work to make sure they cleaned properly.  I report back to their boss if anything is not done correctly.  This bathroom was COMPLETELY missed.  I was pretty upset, but naturally, I think they thought the chocolate was poop and were appalled.  LOL!  When I called the owner of the company to tell them that they missed an entire bathroom and shared the video of what our elves did and explained that it was chocolate, the owner said, "They thought it was decoration, so they didn't know what to do!" This is a spanish speaking crew, so I sorta had to believe that because I don't think they know the word diarrhea.  I swear, these stories are so funny and I am so glad I am documenting them for a rainy day when I am old and grey and have nothing to do.  

Thank goodness for nose plugs candy can scarfs and deodorizer spray!

Happy Halloween! ~2018

Halloween Day is always so incredibly hectic.  I plan and I plan and I plan.  I collect and I collect and I collect, but I NEVER have time to put things ALTOGETHER until the DAY OF and that makes the day slightly stressful.  I recall dripping sweat for the last 4 Halloweens in a row.  My kids have had costumes for weeks and pretty much months, but the day before Halloween they informed me that they couldn't wear them.  Jax had an inflatable costume.  He wore it to his Fall Festival at school, but he said it would be too difficult to really enjoy trick or treating.  Lilah had the most hilarious and comfortable costume, that she also wore to her school's Fall Festival, but she didn't want to wear the gigantic mask.  She feared it interfering with her fun. So YOU GUESSED IT... the DAY OF Halloween, I was standing in the Halloween Store, trying to piece mill what they had left, to help create my kids' costume desires.  

Lilah wanted to be a Zombie Cheerleader.  It was a pretty simple costume.  Obviously, she already had her cheer uniform and pom poms. I purchased a long sleeve, white t-shirt from Wal-mart and socks (featured below) from the Halloween Store.  Our local party store sold me some fake, washable blood, and an axe headband that made it appear as if Lilah got axed.  

I used my company's Snow ShadowSense and Onyx ShadowSense to create the dead look. 

Of course, she played the part to a T.

Jax wanted to be the clown from the movie "IT". With only a one day's notice, before Halloween, I was truly limited on options unless of course I wanted to pay $59.99 for the exact "IT" mask. So... close enough.   

Same deal: I purchased a white, long sleeve shirt from Wal-mart, splattered fake blood all over it, and hot glued clown buttons to the shirt. Our local party store, Fun Times, supplied the clown buttons and red helium balloon.  

Pretty creepy!

Well aren't they just the cutest twins ever!?

Tyson claimed that he wasn't going trick or treating. AH...NEGATIVE.  He wasn't going to sit home, on Halloween, night and play playstation.  I gave him the option to pass out candy or come with us. I didn't force him to dress up, but if he was going to collect candy, he had to wear something other than civilian clothing.  He wanted to wear his regular clothing and carry his book bag around.  He said, "I'll just go as a teenager!" I told him that was fine, but it had to be TEEN WOLF.  I picked up a self adhesive, instant werewolf patch. LOL! He wasn't crazy about it. This is a hard stage for him. He is turning into a young man, but still desires and should be able to enjoy being a kid. Doesn't he look so thrilled? This was the ONLY photo he would give me. 

It's always fun seeing all of our friends dressed up!

The day was so hectic that I didn't even have time to put on makeup or even consider costume for myself.  Darren always says I look like a drug addict without my makeup on, so when he walked through the door, after work, he said, "Are you going as a heroin addict tonight?" HYSTERICAL.  Shoot, that works!  So we joked and said we were dressed up as Meth Addicts. "This is your brain on drugs."

It was the night of the Zombies.  Sort of like a Zombie Apocalypse.  Haha.  And leave it to Darren to create comedy out of comedy.  He was trying to give this poor guy CPR.

Because our kids are still "trick or treating" eligible, we have to leave our candy out on the front stoop.  We leave it up to the parents and kids to follow the honor code.  

Halloween didn't seem too crowded.  Darren even mentioned that it seemed quiet and vacant.  

We came home and ate dinner together.  The kids sorted their candy! Jax created a hidden picture for me, in Lilah's sorted candy!

NOW... what to do with ALL OF THIS CANDY!? Sometimes we trade it in to a local dentist's office for cash.  But... as my kids get older, I am not sure they will fall for that. I pray I can keep my hands off of it. 

I hope your Halloween was filled with laughter, great memories, and you arrived home safely.

"YES Day" Results!!!

Well, "Yes Day" came and went and let me start out this post by saying, I WILL NEVER do that again! Write.It.Down. Hold me to it.

Above, I had the kids read the rules out loud and AGREE to all of the guidelines.

The twins started their morning eating candy!

Then they asked me to eat a kitkat mini and I had to say, "YES"! I definitely was NOT thrilled with eating candy at 9:00 a.m.

"Yes Day" included a trip to Target, dressed the way Lilah felt happiest. Ugh... This outfit is her go to outfit.  She'd wear it daily if she could.  Not sure why.  Socks and slides??  SMH. Unbrushed hair.  Sigh...

It also included: A Venti "Pink Drink".

"Can I put Target stickers on your butt?"  Yes! REALLY. 

Goofing around on the shopping carts, making my trip to Target ANYTHING but fun.  

Oh and where was Tyson? HE was home doing what he wanted to do, which was play playstation for 7 hours straight.

Lilah spent her $15 "Yes Day" allowance on Starbuck's and Elmer's Glue.  

Jax spent $10 of his "Yes Day" allowance on PURE JUNK.

Jax also purchased himself a gift card, to Game Stop, with his own money. I agreed to let him buy himself a $25.00 gift card with ZERO hesitation, but when I got off the phone, that $25.00 turned quickly into $45.00.  YUP, you bet your bottom dollar that I said "NO!" on "Yes Day" and it was not a HAPPY moment.  The guilt trips were happening fast and HARD.  "You are already saying no on Yes Day!"  Dang RIGHT. One of the guidelines was that they could not make any permanent decisions and the last time I checked, spending $45 on FortNite gift cards is a permanent way to go BROKE for a 9 year old.  

Apparently, these are the only photos that I captured. AND I believe by the time I made it home, I had had enough of "Yes Day" and said "Game Over".

WHY?  Because my kids were just too manipulative about it.  I would ask Lilah to push her chair in and she would immediately turn around and say, "Mom, can you push my chair in?" Ty literally missed breakfast and lunch and then had to go to football practice on an empty stomach. Lilah realized at 8:30 p.m. that not only had she NOT eaten one meal, but she also hadn't eaten any snacks with substance either. It was all sugar and that Venti pink drink.  After Cheer Camp, she was DYING and I mean DYING of starvation and her attitude was quickly being affected.  The lack of self-control and inability to make wise choices irked me. The unwillingness to be respectful and still desire to be a servant to their home and their parents was too much for me.  I truly didn't think that this day, which was meant to be fun, was glorifying God in anyway.  

I wish I had thought this through a little better AND IF YOU CHOOSE to try a "yes day", I HIGHLY recommend NOT telling your kids that you are having a yes day and JUST SAY "YES" to things, all day long, that you don't normally say yes to and it will just SHOCK them and really make their day!

My kids are just too old and too smart, hence the reason they either manipulated the entire day or made absurd choices for themselves!  I learned that I am definitely a mom who is addicted to saying "NO"!  I'm NO FUN!  I feel bad that the day didn't go quite as I had hoped and anticipated.  I really was excited for this day and excited to see how it all unfolded.  In the end, I think both myself and my kids realized that it's a good thing they are NOT SOLELY responsible for themselves because their choices would cause them to be sick, fat, lazy, unproductive, broke, starving or worse dead.  LOL!

Elf On The Shelf - Day #16

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! As if the cheerios wasn't messy enough.  On Day #16, our elves stuck colorful post it notes ALL. OVER. THE. KITCHEN. CABINETS.  Sigh...

They also left our kids a fun tablecloth to color.  

Above: The elves used three different color Post It Notes.

Below: They specified exactly what color was left for each kid.

Jax: BLUE

Tyson: YELLOW

Lilah: PINK.

Which, to me, meant that they had to clean up the Post It Notes that were left for them. AHAHAHA.

I love how they insinuated messages, like "Color Me" and "Clean UP" your color Post It Notes, by leaving a large array of coloring tools.  

It looks like the elves already began coloring a little bit of the tablecloth.  

What a total mess. I can't deny that it really was pretty though.