Changing the way we live

I've been thinking a lot lately about why we do things the way we do. Why we buy the things we buy, and eat the things we eat. And why we're so hesitant to look at other options, and so quick to laugh and label different ideas as "crazy liberal ideas". Ideas can't hurt us, so why don't we do research and then accept or discount the ideas based on their actual merit?

I've been reading books like, In Defense of Food by Michael Pollan, and Animal Vegetable Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver, and watching documentaries like Botany of Desire and Food Inc..

I gow a garden in the summer, and can as much food as possible for winter use. I raise chickens for eggs (if they'd start laying again), and I try to eat real food as much as possible, though we do still eat convenience foods more than I'd like.

I've been thinking more and more about living in a sustainable way, and the changes I would have to make are scary, but I think they're scary because we've grown up thinking that the way things are are the only way.

What do we do when we can't go to costco and buy a jumbo bag of frozen chicken breast? It sometimes feels easier to live in ignorance of where your food comes from, because once you've seen it, it's a lot harder to continue eating it.

I've joined the coupon craze, though mostly for non-food items since we don't eat a lot of the things there are coupons for (though I got a great deal on walnuts and butter and now have a nice supply in my freezer), but even for things like razors, I've had feelings of guilt for quite some time. I can get razors for free, but not the extra blades, so to never pay for razors we'd end up throwing away entire razors every time the blade goes dull. It's hard to balance the desire for a years supply of all things and still not be part of a rampant consumerism culture.

There are lots of things to think about, but in thinking about starting small, I'm researching how I can avoid eating commercialized meats. Being taught not to waste things, we'll finish up the bag of frozen chicken in the freezer over the next couple of months, and hopefully by then I'll have ideas on where to buy chicken that was raised in a sustainable way, that is healthy for me, for the farmers, and for the planet. I'll also look into the milk I buy and decide if I need to pay more for organic milk, and if that means that we'll be drinking less of it. And, if my chickens don't start laying again, I'll be looking into cruelty free eggs.

I know all of this sounds crazy to some people, but I feel strongly that we humans were placed on the earth to be wise stewards over all things, and I can't justify supporting companies that don't care if they're making us sick, or if their chicken farmers are developing allergies to antibiotics because of their overuse in the chickens, or workers on a killing floor who lose their fingernails to infections, or who care more about their bottom lines than about people dying from e coli poisoning.

UPDATE:

I'm adding links to locally grown/sustainable farms as I find them. The one I have so far is Christiansen's Hog Heaven, which sells heritage breed pigs all processed and delivered in little packages. We're ordering a whole pork and splitting it among family.

Black and White

Recently I heard someone talk about their family in California and how they were affected by proposition 8, and how it showed them that some people are ready to jump up and follow the prophet, while others let things like that damage their testimonies. I have to state clearly, that I really like the person who was speaking, and I recognize that we all have different life experiences which shape us, but it made me wonder why we (subconsciously even) view the world in such black and white terms.

I've written about my feelings toward prop 8 and same sex marriage before, so I won't go into that again, but I wonder why the only "good" response to things like prop 8 is to immediately obey. I'm certainly not advocating that we immediately disobey any time the prophet speaks, I believe we should follow the prophet, but I think that we should allow that those who aren't given the spiritual gift of immediate confirmation also have a valid experience. I remember a few months ago in sunday school, a class member said that she always wondered why she struggled so much to gain a testimony of something, but she felt like once she did, she didn't lose it.

Too often we view those who struggle to gain a testimony of something (or even those who honestly and prayerfully have come to a different answer than our own) as lacking in some way. Instead of wondering why people allow difficult issues to damage their testimonies, perhaps we should ask ourselves how we can help others through trying times in their lives, and then acknowledge that everyone is given a different experience here on earth and one is not better or worse than another, they're just different, which gives us different views and teaches us different things. Life isn't black and white, it's shades of grey.

What do you do for fun?

I can't remember what I used to do for fun when I was single.  I'm sure there was something.  I guess I liked reading, listening to music, shopping, playing my guitar, hanging out (is it just "hanging" now?) with friends.  

After I married my Mister, and even more so when J was born, I couldn't answer if someone asked me what I did for fun.  

Last week, someone asked me that, and I surprised myself with how many things I thought of.  I think maybe it just took me awhile (nearly 10 years?) to figure out how to be a wife and a mother and still be me, and have things that I do for myself, for fun.  

Running the 1/2 marathon was really good for me in that way- It forced me to put myself ahead of other things.  I had to run, or I wouldn't be able to make it through the race, so instead of running if I had time, I made time, I let go of some other things in my life and made running a priority.  Sometimes it messed up dinner times or nap times, but we all survived, and I'm happier because of it.  

I'm cutting back running to three times a week now that the race is over, but I plan on keeping my running time a priority.  It makes me feel good, gives me more energy, and it gives me time to think about whatever I want to think about.  Same with gardening.  I love getting my hands dirty, and watching things I plant grow.  Right now the raspberry canes I planted awhile back are starting to sprout tiny leaves and it makes me happy to know that I did that (and especially happy about the berries, I can't wait!).

So when someone asks you what you do for fun, what do you say?  (I'm embarrassed that it took me so long to realize I have a better answer than "I know I used to have things I liked to do, but I can't remember what they were".)

I Ran!

2.5 miles at a fairly constant speed around 12 minute miles, so not my personal best, but considering I haven't run regularly in almost two years now, I'm pretty pleased with myself.

I haven't registered, but the SL 1/2 Marathon in april might be in my future... (and yes, I know, I have a lot of work to do)

Fear

Awhile back my son was playing with a friend, who said to him, "if you don't let me play with that, I won't be your friend any more".

I recently read on a blog, "If marriage loses, our religious liberties are next".

I dislike fear mongering in any form. I've tried to teach my son to make choices because he wants to do what is right, based on accurate information, not because he feels threatened in some way. Yes, sharing toys is good, but it is inappropriate for a child to threaten friendship over a toy. How more inappropriate for an adult to use similar tactics. However noble (or not, I'm not commenting on marriage amendments today, I'm just using that as an example of fear mongering) the message, if an argument can't stand on it's own merit, it needs a little more work.

Too often we allow fear to determine our actions, fear prompts us to act hastily in situations where well planned decisions would serve us better. The iraq war is one good example, we as a country were lied to and led to believe that an attack on iraq would protect us, and that failure to act immediately would lead to more terrorist attacks. More recently, the concerns over the economy and the mortgage crisis had politicians telling us that a 700 billion dollar bail out was essential but we must act immediately. I don't currently see any benefit from that immediate action, other than my portion of the national debt just jumped. In both instances, we would have been better off to take a little more time, put a little more thought, and use a little more caution in gaining knowledge before committing to action.

Fear divides, knowledge and understanding unite and allow us to work together instead of breaking into "us" and "them". Sometimes I listen to Sean Hannity while I'm driving in the car (don't ask me why, I find him very divisive and rude) if people like Sean Hannity are successful, they pit people who have slightly different ideas against each other and make us forget that we are capable of working together. We spend so much time fighting each other, that we don't focus on really fixing the problem. Obi Wan Liberali at The Hornet's Nest said it well:

For fear is paralyzing. Fear causes one to search for scapegoats, not solutions. Fear can easily disintegrate into paranoia, finding enemies where they don't exist, and losing trust in allies you have a history with. And in the search for scapegoats that fear inspires, who knows what "them" are to wear that label? And pretty soon, we are again, the "Disunited States of America" where your standing as a citizen is subject to whether you fit within that "them" group or not.

Us and Them

I was reading this article on MSNBC about Nancy Pelosi and Iraq financing and troop withdrawl and thought to myself, how did we get this way? The House wants one thing, the president vetoes it, half of the senate wants to pass something, and the other half does all they can to block it. Why do we pay these people?

I'm registered as a democrat. I have family who are registered as republicans. Does it really matter? No one is ever going to agree with another person on 100% of issues 100% of the time, but partisan fighting does nothing to improve our country, or make life easier for the citizens here.

We can disagree on issues and how issues ought to be handled, but when the disagreeing prevents us from getting anything done, it's time to watch Mr. Rogers reruns and learn how to compromise and work together.

It seems like it's time to stop worrying about labels and start worrying about the health and safety of people.

On the road again...

I told myself that I would start running again once the baby started sleeping through the night. I took him in for his two-month check up a couple of days ago where the doctor asked how long he was sleeping at night. I told her 3-4 hours at a time, and she said that he really ought to be sleeping for longer stretches than that (tell that to him, is what I thought). Apparently he heard what she said because last night, I fed him around 11pm or so, and he didn't wake up again until 5:45.

After he went back to sleep, I was wide awake and I kept thinking about how good it would feel to be outside in the morning air with my ipod. I tried to rationalize by saying that 11-5:45 wasn't really the WHOLE night, but the lure of the cool air and the ipod were too strong. It's really nice to have a desire to go running that is strong enough to help overcome the torture of the first few weeks of running after a 9-month hiatus.

I thought I'd start easy with my two-mile loop, but as I was going I decided I could do the three-mile loop. It took me about 30 minutes, which I thought was pretty good for my first time back. Now lets hope I can keep it up.

Taking care of each other

Last week I was having a discussion with some family members about whether the government ought to be in the business of providing welfare-type social services. One argument was that those types of services should be provided by private organizations, like churches.

I don't think that taking care of the less-fortunate among us should be viewed any differently than paying for roads and other conveniences that come along with living in a community. It benefits everyone when we make sure that all of our citizens have their basic needs met, regardless of what they may or may not "deserve". During the discussion we talked about the Sunrise Metro Apartments.

My gardening friend Patrick wrote this based on his personal experiences, and I thought it worth pasting here...

The standard litany I used to hear in community mental health services delivery was this, in order of immediate priority:

1) Provide water and other healthy liquids to drink, and healthy foods to eat, when and where and how people will drink and eat them.

2) Provide permanent housing where people will live -- housing that is safe, affordable, and healthy for the people who live there.

3) Provide community support. This can include places to socialize with peers, places to find medical and psychiatric treatment, places to find information about other services and opportunities. Places to fill in the gaps.

4) Provide the necessary supports to find (and keep) decent work for a living wage. Volunteer and part-time work is of value in itself, can be excellent for training and education -- but full-time paid work needs to be the primary goal, for as many people as can achieve it.

Offer those four primary services in effective ways to people in trouble, and many can go on to live good lives. The costs of emergency services (hospital emerg depts., police, fire, etc.) will drop. Jail and prison populations will be reduced. Alcoholism and other forms of drug abuse will decline.

Sometimes, some services need to be offered in creative ways to people who are in particular difficulties. There are many different approaches to filling in the gaps -- ways of adding necessary rungs on the ladders of support, to use a metaphor.

Despite widespread cynicism about so-called "government handouts" and the so-called "inefficiency of the public sector" (as compared to private enterprise) -- the overwhelming evidence I've seen (in short-term and long-term studies; in observation of many individuals and individual organizations; in my own life) has convinced me this is the cheapest and most reliable path to making a better life. For everyone.

Most people accept the necessity of paying for our roads and sidewalks and bridges and sewers. It bemuses and it saddens me, to think we still have conflicts over keeping our people off our streets; conflicts about removing our people from begging on our sidewalks; conflicts about providing our people with enough hope so they won't jump off our bridges -- and conflicts about helping our people to not throw their own lives into the sewer.

We all individually pay for -- and we all individually suffer from -- the suffering of others. One way or another. Personally, I'd rather pay for solutions to the root causes of problems, instead of band-aid reactions to the symptoms of problems.

All the best,
-Patrick

Story Hour

We weren't in there for an hour, it just seemed like it. I've read that children who wear cloth diapers toilet train faster than children who wear disposables. I think it's because parents get tired of changing cloth diapers faster than they get tired of changing disposables... :)

It's really not so bad, but for some reason I keep thinking that he's old enough to be using the toilet. He's old enough to tell me that he doesn't like his "new" diapers after all. He just doesn't get it. He can sit on the toilet for 20 minutes (it's good reading time- even my 5-year-old joined in on the fun) and do nothing but toot (which he does get excited about!) and then five minutes into a clean diaper, he "goes". It's driving me crazy.

How do I get him to do his duty on the potty? He does make some nice faces while he pretends to poop. It reminds me of my friend whose little boy said to her "don't strain yourself".

My Brother and the Shenpa

My brother is in an interesting position in life. He's trying to figure out what to do to support his family. Should he do something to make a lot of money? Should he do something to help others? I think Ideally, he'd like to do both (although maybe money is not so important to him....). I'd imagine he'd like to provide comfortably for his family.

Here's a really good post on his blog about money.

I want my money.

Check out his other posts too. I've really been enjoying his new blog.

Motivation

Over the weekend, I attended a youth leadership conference in Logan with my city's Youth Council. During the conference (and this is the 3rd one I've been to now), we get to hear some really good speakers. My favorite from this year's conference was Mike Schlappi. He was accidentally shot by his friend when he was a teenager, and paralyzed from the waist down.

He has taken a horrible experience and used it to accomplish amazing things. He was on the US Paralympic Basketball team for 4 olympics, and he presents an amazing story to motivate those he speaks to.

In past years there have been other speakers that I have found to be similarly amazing, people who go through horrible things, but use those experiences to do more with their lives than those of us who have things pretty easy and just continue on day to day doing what we always do.

It really makes me wonder about motivation. What makes some people step up in the face of adversity when others retreat? What makes ordinary people decide to do amazing things? What would I do if I were to face any extreme challenge in my life, and why would I need to wait until then to make a difference in the world?

Where much is given, much is required. I know what it feels like to hurt, but my life has been pretty easy. I've never been hungry without knowing where my next meal would come from. I've never really felt like my life was in danger. I have a comfortable life, so what do I need to do with it? I try to be involved in good causes, I am trying to be more patient with my kids, and do things with them to give them healthy childhood experiences. I guess it's difficult to say whether our everyday actions are "amazing" or not, at least short-term. Maybe our goal should not be to accomplish amazing things, but to not waste the time we have. I can sit and come up with excuses about why I should rest and not do anything all day long, or I can do something with my kids to teach them to serve others.