Showing posts with label prayer shawls. Show all posts
Showing posts with label prayer shawls. Show all posts

Friday, February 28, 2020

Considering Centering Prayer

This week, I finished reading the second book for my certificate in spiritual direction:  Open Mind, Open Heart by Thomas Keating.  This book talks about centering prayer, which is a simple sounding process of sitting in silence for at least 20 minutes a day.  Not talking to God, but sitting in silence--and before starting, one chooses a sacred words so that when one notices stray thoughts, one can say the sacred word and call one's attention back.

The idea that prayer can be sitting in silence for 20 or more minutes was a challenge. I see this practice as meditation, not prayer. But I am willing to admit that I might be limited in my view of prayer. I am realizing how much I feel threatened by silence. I have always felt that silence meant someone was shutting me out and refusing to communicate. I’ve always known this about myself, but reading this book made me realize it again and again. How can we know each other if we’re silent together?

I am willing to admit that the ability to be silent can mean that we know each other more fully, without lots of language getting in the way and obscuring. But I am also realizing how much I rely on language to clarify—and I rely on this clarifying aspect, even as I’m willing to admit/realize how we can’t use language to clarify if we’re not in touch with our feelings—and I think that most of us aren’t deeply in touch with our feelings.

And when I use “we” above, I’m talking about me and anyone with whom I’m trying to be in relationship: God, friends, spouse, other communities. I do think that God is most deeply in touch with God’s own feelings, as well as the feelings of all of us. But I don’t think that each one of us really knows ourselves intimately or deeply. It’s just too hard to do that work, to face our shortcomings, to deal with all the negative stuff. And even if we’ve done that work periodically, it’s hard to stay tuned in to ourselves and each other.

And my other challenge—the despair I feel at trying to find the time to do this.  The book recommends 2 sessions of centering prayer a day, with each session lasting between 20 and 60 minutes.  At the same time, I know it’s because I don’t particularly want to sit in silence. If this book was recommending a collaging technique or a way of coming to know God by stitching fabric together, I’d be out today buying supplies. What does that say about me?

I realize, believe me I do, that finding 20 minutes twice a day should not be that big a deal. I find time to eat and to exercise and to do a bit of spiritual reading and other chunks of time here and there to do other practices that make me happy (like blogging on an almost daily basis and several sessions of sketching and other types of reading). Why am I feeling resistance to this time honored practice of centering prayer?

Is it about the time it takes or the silence aspect of it?

I thought about trying to do this practice for Lent, but I have travels planned--the AWP conference is next week.  But really, that's just an excuse.  There's something in me that just doesn't want to do this.




Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Buttons, Blog Posts, and Prayer Ideas

When I was a child, I loved my grandmother's button box.  I'm sure it baffled her.  My grandmother came of age in the Depression.  She would patch and repair a piece of clothing, and once it was no longer usable, she'd cut off the buttons and save them.  She sewed much of the family clothes, and buttons came in packs that included more buttons than she needed.  She saved them.

She didn't see them as objects of beauty, the way that I did.  She didn't understand why I loved to run my fingers through the buttons or let them fall out of my hands in a stream. 

She saved more buttons than one seamstress would ever use in a lifetime.  This morning, I came across this idea in this post that uses buttons as a prayer device.  It's geared towards children, but as with many good ideas, it could be used with a whole congregation.

On Sunday, I wove a piece of yarn through the prayer loom and reflected that I was seeing new yarn there.  For awhile, I wondered if I was the only one who used it.  But clearly, I'm not.  That idea, too, was one I first discovered in a post on the Internet.  For more on how we used it with VBS children, see this blog post.  For more on how we used it for Maundy Thursday, see this blog post.

This morning I am grateful for all the great ideas that are out there, just waiting for us to discover them.  I'm grateful that we're integrating different ways of prayer into our worship services.  When I was young, they'd have been limited to retreat exercises or camp.

I'm also missing my grandmother and her button box.  Even though I now have a button box of my own, I wish I had hers too.

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

The Perfect Prayer: "Dona Nobis Pacem"

For several days, I've had the music and lyrics from the ancient canon "Dona Nobis Pacem" in my head.  Our church choir sang it as the offertory on Sunday, so my spouse spent time practicing by watching this video.  And now, the music is stuck in my head.

There are worse things.  It's very calming music, and the lyric translates to "Grant us peace."   I've been thinking about other things one might do to calm one's anxiety, simple things that don't require medication.  I want to remember to sing those lines.

Once I thought that essential oils might provide some soothing, so on Friday night, when I felt anxious for reasons I no longer remember, I looked to see what I had left over from our summer of candle making last year.  Citronella--hm, essential these days in Zika infested South Florida, but probably not soothing.  Likewise lemongrass.  So, I put some of the rosemary oil on a paper towel and waited for calm to descend.

Instead, I got annoyed by the smell.  Clearly that's not the way to calm for me.

On Sunday night, we worked on finger picking techniques.  My favorite was to pluck the top string of the ukulele, then the lowest string, and then the two inner strings.  As we practiced, I noticed that I felt immediately calmer.  Let me remember this too.

Traditionalists would tell me to pray, and I do.  But as with many meditation techniques, like clearing my mind, prayer is not enough to shut down the chatter of my brain, what Buddhists would call the monkey mind.

The ukulele technique works because I have something for my hands to do; it's similar to crocheting prayer shawls, which I've also been doing for a variety of reasons.

But praying set to a simple melody--that's the best soothing technique of all.

Sunday, August 9, 2015

Password as Prayer

Most of us live in landscapes that require frequent changing of passwords:  one of my schools has us change passwords every 60 days.

We might start by using the names of our pets as part of our password, but that approach quickly drains us of options.  I understand the case to be made for completely random strings of letters and numbers, but I need something easier for my life of multiple computers and locations.

Last week I was talking about passwords with a group of colleagues.  I said that I used passwords that reminded me of ways to behave, words like patience or mindfulness, along with some numbers.  I also use passwords to remind me of other things I want to make manifest in my life, words like discernment or agent or shortened forms of book titles, again with numbers.

One of my colleague friends said that she uses prayers from her tradition:  one phrase for one password cycle, the next phrase for the next password cycle.  She's got the advantage of being part of a religious tradition that's not as ubiquitous in this part of our country, and she speaks multiple languages, so she could use a non-English language or her own translation if she wanted an extra layer of protection.

I immediately thought of my own prayer traditions, of using parts of the Lord's prayer as password.  I thought of the Psalms which I love and use as part of the Liturgy of the Hours.

I used to put prompts in my Outlook calendar to remind myself to pray.  But to pray every time I type in a password:  this approach is one I must try.

Saturday, August 2, 2014

Prayer Shawls, Prayer Quilts

Now that my friend has it, I can talk more about my time-sensitive quilting project.




My friend fell and broke her leg in several places.  She had to have a metal plate put in her leg.  It will be a long recuperation.

Ordinarily, I'd have sent her a prayer shawl.  I know that she's open to that ministry, as she's asked me to send prayer shawls to family members suffering ravaging illnesses.  So my first thought was to send her one too.

But she crochets.  She's already got more afghans than she can use, and unlike me, she can crochet in interesting patterns.  I know she'd appreciate the thought of a prayer shawl, but I wondered about a different approach.

I decided that a quilt could fulfill the same purpose.  And I had some parts of quilt tops already sewn together.  I decided to assemble them into a single quilt top and put it together.  I liked that there were different patterns and different patches, much for her to look at as she recuperates.



And I needed to do it quickly.  I wanted to get it done before her leg healed.  And so, I began sewing like a woman possessed.

And I got it done.  It's not my best, most intricate work.  But it's a thing of beauty, and my friend reports that it's a comfort.  I prayed as I sewed it, and I had people pray over it as I was finishing it.

I know that many churches have a lap quilt ministry.  Does it exist beside the prayer shawl ministry?   Can a quilted prayer shawl work?



I'm happy to report that my prayer quilt creation seems to have fulfilled the purposes of a prayer shawl.  I've prayed, the quilt has been blessed, and my friend has felt comfort and blessings.

Sunday, July 27, 2014

Quilting and the Next Generation

A week ago, I took my quilting project to church.   Unlike at my house, our church has long tables, where I could do the final cutting and pinning without getting down on the floor.

After the intergenerational service, I stretched it out on one of the tables to be able to cut and pin without having to be on my hands and knees.  Several girls came over and offered to help.  They asked me questions about quilting, and I gave a quick overview.

I offered to teach them more at a later point.  One girl said, "I've got nothing planned for today."  But alas, I didn't anticipate their interest, and so I had no supplies.

Still, I let them pluck pins out of a box and help pin the fabric.  I told them about how I had assembled the quilt, the top and the putting together of the 3 layers.

I also talked about why I was making it; it's a prayer quilt, like a prayer shawl, but made of different materials. We talked about the prayer shawl ministry and why quilts and blankets are such a comfort.  We talked about our favorite quilts and blankets.

Our time was short, so I couldn't give  a quick history lesson.

How I love quilting, one of the art forms that truly began in the U.S.  I love an art form born out of adversity, like the lack of cloth, that shows such cleverness and thrift.  I admire all the ways that humans have reinvented the form.

Maybe I'll make a quilt kit for the girls who helped me on Sunday.  They wanted to make quilts for their dolls.  I was so thrilled that children still played with dolls--and that they want to make things for them!  I left feeling happy in so many ways.

We'll be quilting again at my church.  We've got a day of service projects planned on September 7, and we'll be making at least one quilt for Lutheran World Relief.  Maybe we'll gather once a quarter to work on quilts.  Or maybe we'll just do it once and see what happens.  We're already all so busy.  But if people want to learn to quilt, it's hard for me to say resist.

Saturday, March 1, 2014

Another Way to Serve the Prayer Shawl Group

I have a friend who knits and crochets--she has other friends who knit and crochet.  A few months ago, she talked about all the odds and ends of yarn that she has.  She wondered what to do with them.  I offered to take them to my church's prayer shawl group.

I was expecting a grocery bag full.  But the bag that she gave me takes up half of my car's back seat.  The prayer shawl group is in for a treat.

It's not the textured yarns that I favor.  Of course, I have trouble doing much work with those nubbly yarns with their multiple fibers per strand.

It's a collection of yarns of one color, but what a collection of colors!  There are leftovers from baby blankets and sweaters.  There's a variety of greens from a forest landscape that my friend knitted.  All sorts of treasures.

When she said she had leftovers, I was expecting a small ball here and a tiny scrap there.  But many of the yarns she gave me have most of the skein left.

I'm glad to be able to save these yarns and to give them a new purpose.  I don't have time to make the prayer shawls myself these days.  But I'm happy to be a resource in other ways.

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Even a Four Year Old Understands the Theory Behind Prayer Shawls

My sister wrote me this e-mail about my 4 year old nephew, Jack: "One of Jack's favorite teacher's last day is today (her son Jack was at the school and our Jack loved him....she is my favorite as well). So I asked Jack what he wanted to give her and he said a blanket of his so that if she gets lonely or hurt she can use it. "

He chose one of the blankets that I made for him when he was a baby in my sister's womb, and she wrote to make sure I wouldn't be offended if it left her house and went to the teacher's house.

Offended? On the contrary, I was touched beyond words. I wrote back that I thought it was one of the sweetest things I had heard all week, maybe all month, maybe all year.

It was only later, on my way home, that I thought of prayer shawls and my nephew. When I first heard of prayer shawl ministries, I initially didn't understand the point. But now, after many years of seeing that ministry in action, I do.

It's interesting to me that even a 4 year old can understand at least part of the principle behind prayer shawls. He may not understand the prayer part of the equation yet, but I suspect he does. I've noticed that many four year olds have a much finer understanding of theology than most grown ups.

Friday, July 3, 2009

Portable Prayer Shawls

One of my grad school friends got some bad news about her dad, who is battling cancer: the first treatment wasn't working. One feels so helpless in this position. I thought about having my church send a prayer shawl, but I know that they come from a religious tradition that doesn't do much (yet) with prayer shawls, so I wasn't sure that was the right thing to do. I decided to make my own version: the portable prayer shawl!




I like the symbolism of the butterflies on the fabric. Each one of these is small enough to fit into a business size envelope. I also put a loop at the top, so they can be hung in some place where they will be a cheerful reminder that people are praying for the family. Hopefully, the butterflies will remind my friend and her family of the possibility of life emerging from the most unlikely circumstances.





A close up of the quilting--my grandmother would be ashamed of my sloppy stitching, but I'm hoping it's the thought that counts.




For the backing fabric, I chose this depiction of sweet treats. My first impulse when someone is in trouble is to bake--but I know that many people are battling weight gain and diabetes. Here's a calorie-free way to send good wishes--not as much fun as gooey brownies, but more practical. And it will last longer.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Baby Quilts as Prayer Shawls

I've taken a lesson that I've learned from the prayer shawl group at church and applied it to one of my favorite hobbies: making baby quilts.

I love to make baby quilts entirely by hand for friends and family who are having babies. Our multi-faith women's group likes to collect items for indigent moms, and I like to make baby quilts for the travelling bassinet that comes around. I like to make small quilts for Kids In Distress, a local group who takes care of abused children.

No matter who will receive the quilt, I've started praying for the child and the family as I stitch. It's not a continuous prayer. I can still socialize with my quilting group. But at least once during each sewing/quilting session, I offer up a prayer.

Unlike prayer shawls, not every quilt is going to a distressed person. Still, I figure it doesn't hurt to pray for babies and children. Before I had a little nephew, I wasn't as aware of all the dangers that seem to lurk everywhere. And I'm not just talking about predator scum who go after kids. When I think about their underdeveloped immune systems, I offer additional prayers. When I think about our financial crisis and the reverberations that will echo through the years and decades, I say a prayer. When I think about all the stresses that families, even solid ones, face, I pray more fiercely.

And then I give the quilt away, and I work on trusting God to hold us all in God's giant quilt of a world.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

The Value of Prayer Shawl Ministries

Around 2002, I first heard about prayer shawl ministries. I immediately understood the value for the people who made the prayer shawls, but I couldn't quite fathom what the recipient was supposed to do with a prayer shawl. I imagined the recipient getting the shawl in the middle of summer and wondering what to do with it.

A few years later, I was a member of a church that lost the roof of its education building during hurricane Wilma. The damage to the sanctuary was astonishing, even though it hadn't lost its roof. I was church council president, so I needed to provide some leadership. But I was dealing with my own home repairs, after hurricanes Katrina and Wilma. New Orleans sustained much, much more Katrina damage, but Katrina crossed over the peninsula of Florida as a category 1 storm and reminded us of how much damage a "weak" hurricane can inflict. And then, two months later, Hurricane Wilma came along to finish the job.

I spent the autumn of 2005 shuttling between damaged church, damaged home, and damaged (slightly) workplace. I couldn't imagine how we would ever put it all back together again.

In the midst of my autumn of despair, a prayer shawl arrived from Oklahoma. The pastor of my damaged church looked at it, puzzled. "What are we supposed to do with this?"

I read the enclosed note: "We know about your damaged church, and we are holding you in prayer."

I went to the bathroom so that I could weep in private. Back in my pre-hurricane-damage days, I would never have thought that such a simple gesture would means so much to me.

Did that prayer shawl magically heal the roof? Of course not. But it reminded me that I am not alone, and that gave me some strength to face the tasks that had to be done. Did we need the warmth of a prayer shawl wrapped around ourselves? No, quite the contrary. With no electricity for 2-6 weeks, as the weather returned to muggy heat, we needed just the opposite.

Did we need prayers? Yes. Did we need to be reminded that others were praying? More than you can imagine.