Tim Mc Carver Said THIS About Dave Roberts

"I Remember When Roberts Stole that base off Mariano in The '04 National League Playoff"(Tim Mc Carver on FOX Saturday Baseball, 11th Inning on Saturday, May 19th, 2006).

It was Classical Tim, much closer to Ralph Kiner, in short, a BLOOPER.

From Onion-Re-Antiquating Fenway Park? Puh-Leeze!

Red Sox Announce Plans To Return Fenway To Original 1912 Conditions

MLB Humorous Top 10 List

Top 10 Things Dreaded About The Start Of Regular Season In Major
League Baseball
#10: Guest throwing 1st Ball at Citi Field, causing fans to shout "Omar? Sign Him";
#9: The most-dreaded words spoken on Saturday at 4:10PM, ET are "I'm
Joe Buck. Tim Mc Carver will be along in a moment";
#8: A-Rod is lonely as neither the RCMP nor FBI want to talk to him so
he chases another starlet;
#7: Game hasn't started but Michael Kay shouts "C 'Ya";
#6: Tim Mc Carver mispronounces Derek Jeter's Name, 17+ times in a
game not involving the Yankees;
#5: Your favorite player has received clearance from the Mets Medical
Department and he plays for the Red Sox;
#5: You're a Red Sox Fan wearing the gear, in Section 203 of the Right
Field Bleachers, being serenaded by the Bleacher Creatures at Yankee
Stadium III;
#4: You Bleed For "The Orange And Blue". At this rate, you'll be a
vampire in NO Time;
#3: Opening Day Scorecard has Mets DL Listees;
#2: Red Sox Radiocasters Joe Castiglione and Dave O'Brien learning
Japanese Pronunciation from Mets TV & tbs Commentator Ron Darling.
Very Funny! Can You Believe It;
#1: Mets release a list of probables for the DL. Fans shout "Let's
Hope that Jeffy is on there".

The Pez Report

What Happened at The MLB 4PM Non Waiver Trade Deadline

Omar Minaya went on the 15 Day DL. He sprained his hands after Sitting on Them.

Child At Class Story Time

It was class story time. It was about how fathers earn a living. One child said her father was a Detective. Another said that the father was a Sanitation Man:

Little Johnny told the class that his father was an exotic dancer in a gay bath house. He said that his father would dance and do lewd things;

His teacher called him out into the hall. The teacher asked him just what is the problem & what does the father do for a living;

Johnny agreed to tell the class the truth. He told them, ashamedly, that "My Dad works for the NY Mets. You see, he's their General Manager";

To which a child, whose last name starts with a Q, cracked "And He's a Big, Fat Idiot & a Clueless Putz"

The Pez Report-Humor

A Laugh

MLB Fans are carrying Crosses & Stars of David to games:



It's to stop all those Blood-Sucking Umpires;



Lol(From Eamonn, Irish Philosopher & Blogger-Humorist).

My Words Of Advice For A-Roid

You DEFINITELY NEED to GFY!

Later!

How About A Dunk Tank With THESE THREE INSTEAD

Appropriate! A-FRAUD, A-Puttana and A-Green Tea in a Dunk Tank!

To Raise Funds How About A Dunk Tank With THESE TWO As Victims

Lines would stretch for hundreds of Miles, so everyone could take a shot at dunking THESE TWO, both a bane of America, each Saturday at 3:55PM, ET:

Deficit SOLVED;

And Tim would find THAT, DESPICABLE, as would Buck;

BUT, Not Manny!

Since Highlander Fans Believe In Curses

Bury Joe Torre's Book and A-Fraud's Jersey in The Great Hall:

Yankees(Highlanders)go NOWHERE;

Here's to their New Home(Pictured Here);

An Eric Gagne' Song From Lorne And Wally By Tom Doyle

Let's Just Say That Eric Gagne', p---ed off Red Sox Nation, A LOT, in 2007:

Click on The Title To Listen;

Ditto, Mr Eric Mangini!

"Dear Curt", I NEED MORE Than a Few Laughs

Click on the title of a satirical blog, written in the style of how Curt Schilling might sound, answering letters with his own advice:

We could use a few laughs, in between boots of balls in play, especially when said balls are hit to Julio Lugo, or when the 'pen s---- the proverbial bed;

Later!

"Mr Hanky" Cries The Blues About Injuries

"Mr Hanky" pictured here, spoke from the NY Yankees Home Office(Also Pictured), in regards to his Injury-Ridden Team. The NY Sports Print Media, is having a field day with Mr Hanky;

Click on the Title Above, for the link;

Later!

Zipadapadolimine-A New Drug Up And Coming(At Least On MLB On FOX)

It cures baldness. It cures Cancer. It Cures Hypertension. It cures Yeast Infections, all in one pill:

Side Effects include temper tantrums or some memory loss;

These 3 are advised not to take Zipadapadolimine;

In the case of the Guy on the Right Side, it's bad enough that he tells us that Youkilis would make a good #8 Hitter with the Pitcher due up, during the A L C S, while the Guy on The Left just doesn't care;

In the case of the 3rd Guy, he'll knock over a pitcher of Green Tea, if Torre' doesn't give him the weekend off;

Later!

MCMXLVIII-The Tim Mc Carver All Star List Of Mangled Player Names

At 1st Base is Luis Puljols(St Louis): LF is Tampa Bay's Chris Floyd; At 2nd Base Is Jacoby Elldroia(Red Sox); At 3rd Base is The SF Giants Kevin Youkilis; in RF is Boston's Trot Drew; Catching is Angie Molina(SF Giants); In CF is the NY Mets Eric Chavez; AT Shortstop is Joey Cora(Red Sox); The DH is Manny Ortez(Red Sox); Pitching is Brandon Arroyo(Reds);

This is what you might hear on FOX. Don't say that I Didn't warn you. AND This is Tim's NL Team;

Later!

Text N0 to 36197

To Keep Madonna out of Yankee Stadium during The All Star Game & not shown on FOX.

Top 10 Signs You're At A Bad Red Sox Bar

#10: Ownership Group headed by Someone named "Fred";
#9: Curious Photo of Roger Clemens in a Red Sox Uniform;
#8: Frequent Reunions of the 1986 Mets;
#7: General Manager with 1st Name of Omar;
#6: Whiny Managing Director named Jeffy, orders cutback on quality, while new place is being built in restaurant-bar's parking lot;
#5: Food Menu, copied from "Professor Thom's", food causes cramping and gas;
#4: Smell of Hair Dye, coming from Restaurant Guests, Keith Hernandez and Tim Mc Carver;
#3: Place is constantly saluted with the "F" Word;
#2: Favorite Bartender named Willie is fired, because Jeffy cut back on the Good Stuff;
#1; It's Called "The Citiera".

Red Sox Nation's Name For Yankee Stadium-Self Explanatory

It's 3:14 AM-ET

Has your local MLB Team fired their manager, YET?

To Those House Members Who Preferred Being White House Cheerleaders To Getting To The Truth About Roger Clemens-Here Is Your Fate

You should be locked in a room for two hours & not being allowed to leave & be forced to listen to this duo. It will NOT be pretty, trust me when I say that:

It'll scare these people & they'll throw things at the screen;

Mike-RSN-NYCQ