A Thin Slice of Humanity

OK, look.....I try not to get into religion. With anyone. Let alone on here.

Yeah, I know I rant about politics or the state our country is in (or not in). But that's just because I think we all need to be more aware.

I just received an email. And despite my better judgement I began to read it. I haven't even gotten 1/4 of the way through it and before I became so infuriated I had to immediately begin a blog post about it.

This email began with this woman in an airport who is reading her bible. And how she is sooo happy to be living in The Spirit. I'm sorry but these kinds of things scare me & I don't even know why I was entertaining this email. She looks up and sees a man sitting in a wheelchair who is obviously sick, old, hungry, tired and/or all of these. She keeps looking at him and wondering what his story is. And this line...this is what has my panties in a bunch:

There I sat, trying to concentrate on the Word to keep from being concerned about a thin slice of humanity served on a wheelchair only a few seats from me.

I'm not going to rant. I'm not going to rave. I'll let these words speak for themselves.
All I really want to say is that this absolutely, definitely, with-out question defines and puts quickly into words the last 7 years in this country.
Can I get an Amen?

A Little Respect (Long)

While talking with one of my girlfriends this morning, it has occured to me that I'm really worn out and worn down.
I don't feel like complaining about it or getting into details. But I will explain where I'm at.
I just realized that lately I have immersed myself in projects, books and even blogging to try to divert my attention from those things that I just don't feel like tending to. But it's time to clean house.
The thing is - that most people don't understand - is that I'm all sunshine and smiles most of the time. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. Even when you don't deserve it. I'll make excuses for ill behavior, turn my cheek and look the other way. However, I get my fill. And most people see me when I've had my fill. When I explode.
It's really unfortunate because no matter how many times I do turn the other cheek, bite my tongue or ignore whatever crap you throw at me, people will only choose to remember the times when I've said, "Look, dick. Enough is enough. I'm done." I don't control my anger very well when I get to that point. Let's face it, I'll call a spade a spade. I'm an emotional, passionate person. And when I feel something, I don't just feel it a little. I feel it with every ounce of my being. When I feel like something is worth my emotions, you know it. But if people only want to choose to see one side of me. The side that only pokes it's ugly head out a few times a year, then well, that's your choice. I digress.
I've known that I'm on the verge of combusting for quite a few months now. And I'm trying to keep things reigned in. I'm trying to cope in more healthy, productive ways. I'm trying to only confront those things worth confronting. Man, it's hard. It's hard to tell myself that there's nothing wrong with me. And people who make me feel that way aren't worth my time. But at the same time, there are healthier ways to deal with the things.
I just feel that it's time to, as much as I possibly can, remove the toxic people from my life. You know, the ones that are so miserable, they want to suck every ray of goodness you have left. The ones that are truly life suckers. You leave them feeling drained, sick and questioning why you keep trying. The ones that never dig deep enough to find one nice thing to say. The ones that don't care enough about you (or your family) to respect the choices/decisions you're making as an adult.
Life is too short. I want to enjoy it. I don't want to waste it on those who are wasting their energies in negative ways. I want to share with my children the happy, positive things. I want my kids to feel happiness, to have a positive self-image, to always listen to their inner voice without question.
I'm tired of worrying, trying to fix, trying to change, trying to conform. Always being 'unworthy', uninvited, and undermined. "Go sell crazy somewhere else. We're all stocked up here." I'm me. Take it or leave it.
Here's the thing. I'll respect your negativity. If you just respect me.

You Fondle My Trigger, Then You Blame My Gun

You know, I am just so tired of trying to keep the peace, keeping my mouth shut (against my better judgement) when you mess with my kids. You can say whatever you want about me, I don't really care. Don't mess with my kids. Also, don't be surprised, when you do mess with my kids, that I unleash my guns. You back me into a corner & you're surprised when I fight?? And then after many of your cruelties, I've kept my mouth shut & I finally go off & I'm the bitch, the asshole, the loose cannon? Yeah, sure. No problem. If that means that my kids are spared your sickness, I'll wear all of those hats and more.

I just get sick of people pushing and pushing. I keep taking it & taking it. And at last, when I've had my share, I decide to take a stand & ka-boom. And everone stands there with a deer in headlights look. You weren't expecting it? Oh no? I'm so sorry. HOW MUCH MORE DO YOU WANT ME TO TAKE?????

Aaaaaah, that feels better. Demon purged. I repeat, demon purged. For now, anyway.