No Going Back

Note to my readers this morning:   After I published my post today...it vanished.  Poof...just vanished.  I am trying to remember what I wrote on the fly so sorry to say...what you get is what I can remember writing about.  Blogger is being very unfriendly today.  I find this especially ironic as I am talking about do-overs.  Someone at Blogger has a evil sense of humor.

Have you ever done something, only to regret having done it and wish for a do over?  Perhaps, several do-overs such as Bill Murray had in the movie Groundhog's Day.   This weeks "odd news makers might of wished for a second chance.

From Bad to Worse

A man in China, was supposedly so depressed by his lacking love life that in a moment of desperation, he cut off his penis, the Mirror reported. (Now that isn't going to do much for his love life, is it?)
 Shortly after his amateur amputation, 26-year-old Yang Hu had second thoughts and quickly got to a hospital in hopes of getting his sex organ reattached.

Actually "quickly" is the wrong word since he went to the hospital by riding his bicycle. To make matters worse -- as if that's possible -- he actually forgot to bring his chopped-off penis with him, requiring him to ride his bike back to the home, the Daily Star reported.

When he returned with his dismembered organ, the doctors gave him some bad news: Because Yang's penis had been without blood for too long, it would be impossible to reattach, HuffPost UK reported.

The rule of thumb as far as any body part...don't leave home without it.


Speaking of Missing Body Parts

A severed finger left at the crime scene helped police in Glendale,  Arizona arrest a man suspected of trying to steal copper wire.

An air conditioning company employee reported to the Glendale police that  someone tried to steal the wire from his truck on Oct. 7th.

The spool of wire — worth more than $300 — had been pulled out about 20 feet from the truck, and what appeared to be a cut off finger was caught in the wiring.

Police retrieved the finger as evidence, and forensic technicians were able to match the fingerprint to 29-year-old Joshua Allen Goverman.

Goverman told detectives he lost a finger while working on a car. (not really a great excuse as the police had caught him red handed albeit minus one finger) He was booked on suspicion of theft. 

Authorities didn't know whether Goverman had a lawyer who could be reached for comment.


Perhaps, Goverman is having trouble dialing his lawyer's number.

Do Over and Over and Over

A Kingsport, Tennessee woman's food cravings allegedly ran amok Wednesday morning, as her boyfriend's refusal to go to McDonald's spurred her to run him over with a pickup truck — striking him three times.

Crystal Greer Brooks was arrested shortly after midnight when police arrived at the scene and found evidence of injuries to Brook's boyfriend that appeared to be consistent with being dragged under the truck.

Upon interviewing a witness, police learned Brooks, her boyfriend and an acquaintance had "all been drinking" then had decided to go out to get something to eat.  (are we surprised about the drinking part?)

Brooks allegedly became angry at their choice of restaurant — which is not identified in the police report — and demanded that her boyfriend pull his pickup truck to the side of the road. As he exited and walked to the front of the vehicle, she slid behind the wheel.

According to witness statements to police, Brooks then pulled forward and struck her boyfriend, knocking him, "onto the hood and then onto the ground." She's then alleged to have accelerated forward two additional times, striking her boyfriend in each instance.

Brooks denied hitting the man with the truck, claiming that he had, "jumped onto the hood." Based on his injuries and tattered clothing, police determined otherwise.

An individual who accompanied the pair attributed the attack to the golden arches, saying Brooks, "was mad they didn't stop at McDonald's."

Brooks was arrested and charged with aggravated assault, booked into the city jail and then transported to the Sullivan County jail in Blountville.


That is the very definition of a Mac-attack.  You have to wonder what the boyfriend's choice of a restaurant was, if McDonalds was a step up.

Failure is a Bitter Pill

After reading some of the odd news articles this week, it occurs to me that perhaps, some of these poor slobs that found themselves being apprehended must look back with regret.  Sure, it stinks getting caught in the commission of a crime, I suspect. (I don't have first hand knowledge but I am assuming that is the case.) But wouldn't it even be worse  if everyone that read the account of the crime,  thought "What a dumbass!"

So in our effort to help "criminal-want-to-be's" not to appear quite as stupid,  Crabby Pants is offering some remedial criminality classes. Here at TAOBC we are all about promoting the idea  "do things to the best of your ability."  Seriously...if you are going to do something, do it at least well enough that you don't cause people to spurt coffee out of their nose because they are laughing at you.  

 So....Just to clarify....  This class isn't about teaching people to break the laws...this is a class to teach people that are already criminals from further embarrassing themselves with the extremely stupid decisions that lead to having their mug shot appear in the likes of  The Smoking Gun or The Huffington Post.

Let's work together to insure that you are the laughing stock of your cell block. 

So to all you lowly law-breakers out there that  are up for a little self-improvement......Welcome to Remedial Criminality

 Jumping the Gun

After Jimmy Dewayne Whipple of Port Charlotte, Florida called deputies to report a stolen firearm on Tuesday, deputies learned he was a convicted felon and thus prohibited from possessing guns, the Charlotte County Sheriff's Office reported.
 
Arriving deputies also noticed some illegal stuff at Whipple's home, such as a smoking pipe,  a grinder, a container, and four small smoked ‘joints’ on a coffee table.  The grinder's contents tested positive for cannabis. according to the report.

Deputies also reportedly found a pill bottle that contained a drug for which Whipple did not have a prescription.

Whipple was charged with possession of firearms by a convicted felon, possession of drug paraphernalia, possession of marijuana, and possession of drugs without a prescription. 


Basic rule of thumb..... Don't invite cops over to your home if you have  illegal drugs sitting about. Your home may be your castle but it's not supposed to be your pharmacy. 

 Dis-tracked  Driver

A Louisiana man  got distracted while driving because he was shooting up heroin at the same time rammed into the back of a police car on Monday. Ronald Caplina was driving about 40 mph when he crashed into the lieutenant’s police vehicle.

The Slidell police officer sustained minor injuries from the accident which happened at about 4 PM, according to WAFB. The officer was monitoring traffic and was parked on the shoulder when he noticed a  car veer off the road and head straight toward his car.

The impact pushed the police officer's vehicle several feet, causing minor injuries to both the officer and Caplina, who was not wearing his seat belt.

Slidell Police tried asking Caplina why he was distracted, but he could not give them a clear answer.

Police discovered a fresh syringe, along with suspected heroin, inside the vehicle and Caplina had fresh  track marks on his arm.

Police believe Caplina was distracted because he was injecting heroin at the time of the crash.


While it's never a good idea to hit a cop car, it makes it significantly worse, if you are shooting up heroine.  

With Friends Like This....

After 25 beers — maybe more, police say — a Springfield, Missouri  man fired a handgun from a vehicle, trying to hit a snake slithering across the street.

Two shots hit the car’s roof, one struck a passenger’s head and a fourth shot actually made it across the street, court documents say. While , Erin Moad, the passenger, was not seriously injured, according to the documents, he had to of been disappointed that the story focused more on the snake than the fact some drunk shot him in the head.

Tyler C. Parker was charged Tuesday with second-degree assault as well as one count of “unlawful use of a loaded firearm by an intoxicated person.”

Deputies were alerted to the July 20 shooting when hospital staff reported a suspicious gunshot wound.  According to court documents, Parker admitted to shooting across the farm road at a snake while sitting on the door of the vehicle. He allegedly said he had drank 25 beers or more.

If convicted, he could face as much as 11 years in prison.

I did find it interesting there are a lot of articles about this and nearly all of them focus on the fact the guy was shooting a snake while hanging out the car's window.  The fact, he shot his friend in the head seems to be a sub-plot.  

What Lesson Did You Learn?

I call foul!!! These government scandals  are  hogging the news programs.  All week there has been a drought of funny "can you believe they did that?" kind of news.  Seriously,  didn't we all  know that despite their campaign telling us they were the new and friendlier IRS that they aren't really all that friendly. AND as far as the government monitoring all the Verizon phone records...you already knew that our privacy isn't private.  

Crabby Pants was trying to create a scandal...well perhaps more that she wanted to participate in a scandal but she fell short.

It Could Be Funny

I know that humor can be VERY subjective.  What I find funny, you may not and vice versa.  Although, it should be noted that I can usually find humor in about anything.  Unfortunately, this trait has not always proven to be a good thing. Laughing at inappropriate times isn't always  (OK...let's say... IS RARELY) appreciated.

I think funny glasses are humorous
on some people.

I sometimes feel that I am "swimming against the stream" as far as humor goes.  This was recently reinforced when I went to a lecture on the subject of humor.  The speaker refers to herself as a Dr. of  Humor.  Self- proclaimed doctor, I am sure. Frankly, I just didn't "get" her humor at all. A lot of the audience seemed to be entertained by her anecdotes of what  she found funny at her mother's funeral.  I wasn't moved to emit even so much as a chuckle.  During the portion of her program where she hauled audience members to the stage and forced them to wear funny glasses,  I was sneaking peeks at my watch. It had to be apparent that I wasn't rolling in the aisle with uncontrolled laughter, thereby giving me a 100% chance of never being invited up to the stage.

Why am I explaining my somewhat "off kilter" sense of humor?  Well...this week, while I was trolling around for news some of this week's odd news stories, several reports  that caught my eye, weren't necessary funny in their subject matter as much as the tie-in of certain words or unlikely outcomes. 

Let's start with an April Fools prank...those tend to be tricky.  What may be funny in theory may not be so funny in execution.   I have to wonder how many times the perpetrator said "Watch this! This is going to be hysterical." only to be followed up with someone else saying "Do you understand these rights as I have explained them to you?"

And The Award Goes To

For those of you that aren't regular readers, here at The Art of Being Conflicted, our two reporters look for the "odd or weird" little news stories that you might of missed due to the over-reporting of the BIG stories. Every Friday, Reporter Cheryl P. and Crabby Pants try to find a little something unusual in the news.

Upon occasion, we give out awards here at TAOBC for the more inventive creative stories that make our Friday post.

The Westminster Dog Show, also, gave out an award this week to a little cutie named Banana Joe.

Drinking, Yes...Thinking, No

According to police, April Cassidy Velez drove to the Hamden Police Department last Saturday to bail out her husband.  Her husband, Edwin, had been arrested earlier in the day for Driving Under the Influence.

Unfortunately, for April she showed up at the station intoxicated.  Upon further checking, the police found that she had parked her pickup in a snow drift in the parking lot that was marked "for police vehicles only". The truck had a number of empty beer cans in it, as well as a full six pack.

She was arrested. for driving while intoxicated.  Both her and her husband will be back in court later this month.

The husband and wife that drink together get to go to the clink together.

Friday News

Such variety this week in the news category.  As I was looking through the varied sources to find my "weird" news for the week,  I came across another couple of surveys.   I am astonished by the number of polls and surveys taken in January.  Perhaps, this is National Survey Month...I need to check on that.

• This past week the Public Policy Polling people did a survey to determine the popularity of the U.S. Congress.  According to them Congress has a whopping 9% approval rating.  Fifty-seven percent of the respondents said they think more favorably of root canals than Congress.  Fifty-eight percent said they would favor colonoscopies over Congress.

• A survey conducted by CareerCast released a list of what they believe to be the 10 most stressful jobs.  (does anyone, other than me find it odd that police officers came in 10th?)

10.Police officer
9. Taxi driver
8. Newspaper reporter
7.Photojournalist
6. Senior corporate executive
5. PR executive
4. Commercial airline pilot
3. Firefighter
2. Military general
1. Enlisted military personnel

A Word To The Wise

You might remember that in my post last Monday (yeah, the one that was supposed to be for Tuesday...that one) I was telling you about my plan to become more optimistic.  It turns out there is a new study aimed at helping us all to become more "yay-sayers" instead of "nay-sayers".  For those of you that have been reading my blog for awhile, you KNOW how much I believe in studies. (dripping in sarcasm).  As studies, polls and graphs always give totally accurate information, (more sarcasm mixed with a little scorn) I thought I would offer up a Public Service Announcement, of sorts.  So  before I fill you in on the "what were they thinking?" news for the week, I will tell you about another study that may or may not have an ounce of credibility.

Take the Trash Out

According to new research study that was published in  Psychological Science, if  you write down your negative thoughts and toss them into the trash, those pesky negative thoughts will be removed from your mind. According to this cutting-edge psychological test, you can  get rid of of all that negative brain trash by writing it down  and just throwing it away.  The study did note that if you prefer you could put your negativity into a computer document and drag them into the trash can on your desktop.  Good to know for those of you that no longer remember how to write without  the aid of a technical  device.  Any way,  according to them. this will keep you thinking more positive. 

I did notice that this research that was led by Pablo Brinol at the Universidad Autonoma Madrid  (I type it as I see it, folks) consisted of asking high school students to write down negative and positive thoughts about their bodies. (why it was limited to just their bodies, I haven't a clue) Then test participants were asked to either toss them or keep them.  Supposedly the students that tossed their negative thoughts were unburdened of their negativity.

Just to keep you thoroughly informed, I am presently jotting various negative thoughts onto little scraps of paper (which pertain to the fact,  I think that any study limited to teenagers thoughts on their bodies might be flawed from the very start)  I will be tossing these little  pieces of paper in the garbage shortly.   Let's just see if that purges me from the skepticism I have regarding the accuracy of this particular study.


Flying in the Face of Fashion

Do all those extra baggage fees get you down? Here's an idea.  Follow the lead of a man  at the Guanzhou Baiyun International Airport in China earlier this week.

According to The Examiner, the unnamed man was told that he would have to pay extra fees or get rid of some of the weight of his luggage. Not willing to do either, he removed approximately 60 shirts, 9 pair of jeans from his bag and proceeded to put them on.  (I wouldn't of thought this was possible but according to the Guangzhou Daily, it is.)

After layering all his clothes he proceeded to board the plane.  Well...at least that was his plan.  He was stopped by the metal detector and was required to have a full body search.  He had forgotten to remove thumb drives and chargers from his packed clothes.

Seriously?  How much was the baggage charge that would inspire someone to put on 60 shirts.  I am not sure  if there is an upper limit to what I would pay not to have a full body search from an airport security person. 


Don't Blame the Ghost

Debbie Michelle Zamacona, a woman from Winder, Georgia, recently called the police to report a theft in her home.  She said her resume and a black and blue blouse had been stolen.  (odd combination..wouldn't you agree?)

What made this report a tad unusual beside the fact the electronics weren't stolen, was the fact that she listed the value of her resume at $5000.00.  She, also, went on to tell the police she knew who the thief was.

She suspected it was one of the two ghosts that had been coming into her home.  She said the ghost of her mother frequents the house and she brings with her two malevolent entities with her.  Debbie is sure that one of them, stole her resume and blouse.

What made this story even more "odd" is that there was a quote by a paranormal investigator that said, "if the items were actually stolen, it would have been done by a poltergeist not a ghost."
 Poltergeists are more mischievous.  By all  means...let's use our words wisely and not go around falsely blaming ghosts.



No Truth in Advertising

A Florida man went into the Shark Lounge Liquor store with his 11 month child.  He left his little one at the counter with the clerk and proceeded into the adjoining Shark Lounge Gentlemen's Club.

The clerk called the police and the daddy, Kenneth Rowe, was charged with child neglect.

So what?, I hear you saying....The reason, I am even mentioning this is Shark Lounge slogan is "We will Rock You."

Evidently they don't.

It's a Swing and a Miss..I Hope

I hesitate to start yelling "SAFE" as the day isn't over but as I have said in my previous post, I am pretty secure in my belief that we will still be here tomorrow.

So what oddities have happened this week?   Let's recap some of the more creative thinkers among us.


Foul Ball


The Chicago Sun-Times reports that   Christine A. Meyers picked up her boyfriend from a bar on Friday.  However, on the way to their home in Tinley Park, the two got into a heated argument.  This is where the story took an odd turn.  The boyfriend got out of the car and laid down in front of it. (Should we ask the question...was alcohol involved in this choice?)

As you might imagine, this wasn't a wise move on his part.  Christine put the car in drive and purposely ran over him.  The boyfriend suffered severe burns to his chest and back and had the skin torn off his testicles.

The boyfriend was taken to the hospital and Christine was taken to jail.  Her lawyer tried to have her released on a $6000 bond but the judge responded "ARE YOU SERIOUS?'

The judge set bail at $100,000 for aggravated domestic battery. 

OK..was it just me?  At anytime during that story, did any of you say  "That took balls?"


Three Strikes and You're Out

An unknown man attempted to carjack three separate cars in a Target parking lot in Oceanside, CA on Thursday.

According to the police a man approached a woman getting out of her car around 2:50 PM.  He showed her what she believed to be a knife ordering her back into her vehicle. She got back into her car and drove away.  (Strike One)

The the man immediately approached another woman that was exiting her car.  This time he brandished a handgun and told her to get back into her car.  The victim ignored the man and ran into the store to report the incident. (Strike Two)

Then the man approached a third car.  He attempted to steal the car at gunpoint. He asked the car's owner to remove the club device on the steering wheel and leave the keys in the car.  The victim did exactly what she was told. HOWEVER, when she walked away she activated a kill switch that killed the engine and locked him in the car.  (Strike Three)

Unfortunately, he smashed out the window and escaped the scene. He remains at large.

He is a better escape artist than he is a carjacker.


Stealing a Base and Heading Home

Two bank robbers who broke out of a high-rise jail in Chicago hailed a cab for their getaway car.  The two men escaped from the Metropolitan Correction Centre in downtown Chicago early on Tuesday morning.

The pair broke out a window in the cell they shared, squeezed through a 6 inch opening (great reason to remain slim)  and lowered themselves 20 stories.  (Seriously..??)  The escape was noticed the following morning when employees noticed approximately 200 ft. of knotted bedsheets hanging down the side of the building.

The two men, Joseph Jose Banks and Kenneth Conley are being sought by the FBI, U.S. Marshalls Service, and the Chicago Police Department.

Update: After an extensive manhunt in the communities of New Lennox and Tinley Park, Banks was captured.  An ongoing investigation is continuing to figure out how the two inmates got over 200 feet of sheets and dental floss used to make their rope. Conley remains at large.

Seems as if Tinley Park has had a busy week.  Bank Robbers and Mad Girlfriends.  It is curious about all the sheets.  Are extra clean sheets one of the perks of jail?

Odd Twists

This week as I looked around my usual places to see what odd or unusual happenings have transpired in the last 7 days, I noticed a lot of "same old" crazy.  However, there are always a few little quirky details that set some stories apart.  So today I am offering up "Crazy with a twist."

Surprise, Surprise!

Jay Conolly, a 29 year old that was serving a jail sentence in the Maricopa County Sheriff's Office Jail, was taken pity on by a 69 year old female (her name is being withheld).  The woman had been doing volunteer work in the facility where Jay was incarcerated.

Surprise! A crook that's not honest???

The woman paid the bail for Connelly and agreed to let him stay at her home in a gated community in Surprise, AZ.  According to a report at Fox news, the woman said she thought the two would get married.

On Thursday, however, Connolly and a lady friend, Candy Dean, overpowered the woman, bound her, stole her cell phone, gun, purse and car.  Connolly and Dean were apprehended the next morning and charged with kidnapping, aggravated robbery, theft, and theft of means of transportation. 


It could be said that I am a cynic....and often is.  When I read the part about  a 69 year old bailing out a 29 year old and taking him home, I had my doubts.  I wasn't at all surprised that things didn't turn out quite like she expected.  What did surprise me, though...is that it happened in Surprise, AZ. 

Speaking of Jails

After 10 AM and  Kierran is still snoozing.

A man from the UK, Kierran Batchelor, was caught burglarizing homes last February. After being tried, he was sentenced to a suspended sentence and probation.  On his release from jail in April he posted to Facebook "IV JUST GOT OUT OF JAIL, IM F**KIN BUZZIN!!!"   Evidently his buzz didn't last very long as he didn't bother to check in with his probation officer.

According to Batchehlor, the 10 AM meetings weren't agreeing with his sleep patterns.  When he was brought back into court he asked the judge to put him in jail.so he could sleep in.

Batchelor was sentenced to 40 weeks in jail.  He thanked the judge on the way out.

Either Keirran has a Vitamin B shortage or he is very confused about the purpose of jails.


Would Your Life Make a Great Movie?

On "My Life Is a Lifetime Movie" viewers met Barbara Reifel.  Her husband is serving time for stealing body parts.  Yeh,....body parts.

I considered Lop N Chop...so many choices for a "parts" store.

After becoming addicted to pain killers, Michael Mastromarino,  started his entrepreneurial venture to sell body parts, bones  and tissue.  Not only did Micheal choose  rather unconventional products but some of his merchandise was diseased with Hepatitis, HIV and cancer.  Still he managed to make over  4 million dollars in 4 years. He was eventually  caught and sentenced to 58 years in prison.

According to one of the investigators in the case,  it was stated that he stole parts from more than 1000  bodies and neglected to get permission from any of them.  (I am serious...that is what the investigator was quoted as saying)


I don't know if I am more shocked at the fact that the 1000 or so bodies failed to give their permission or if a person can peddle 4 million dollars worth of body parts for 4 years and no one noticed something was amiss. I might be wrong, but I think  if Lifetime Movies reaches out to you, you might have a problem.



What a Clown

Ronald McDonald has admitted to following his ex- wife into a McDonalds.  A 50 year old man from Britain, that has the same name as the fast food icon,  had been served with a retraining order last September after assaulting his wife and another woman.

However, Ronald wasn't to be deterred by some restraint and decided to  follow her around. On one of his little stalk-abouts,  he followed her into the Westwood Cross McDonalds. He, also sent her a text. Both actions violated the restraining order.

Ronald received an 86 day sentence for failing to adhere to the order and is forbidden from contacting his wife for the next three years. (this, of course, remains to be seen as he seems to follow orders so well.)




Poor Ronald McDonald, now has the reputation for being a wife beater and probably isn't welcome at the local McDonalds.

Did You Really Think That Was The Best Idea?

Yes, readers, here we are again.... winding our way towards the end of the week .  The culmination of my reading all the lesser-reported stories that exemplify the art of   "thinking outside the box".  You have to admit.... it takes a certain amount of creativity to get your name in the newspaper even if it gets posted under the banner of WEIRD NEWS.

I wonder if the people that appear in these stories are troubled by being the section of the newspaper (or Internet) that is the equivalent of being the "butt of the joke", OR do they buy extra copies and give them out to friends, while saying "Hey, I made it into the Friday edition of the newspaper" ???


Crushing Blow


First up...we have Roger Pion.  Roger had a beef with the local Montpelier, VT police department after a recent arrest on the charges of resisting arrest, and marijuana possession.

As the Montpelier police worked in their building with the windows closed and air conditioners running, they didn't hear anything out of the ordinary.  That was until a good neighbor called 911 to tell them that there was a tractor rolling over  their vehicles. (Luckily for the department, a few vehicles were off on calls.)

Yeah, angry man on tractor (Pion) was crushing most of the department's vehicles.  By the time they ran outside they had lost 5 marked cruisers, 1 unmarked cruiser and a transport van.  Unfortunately, for them they just had to stand while they watched the tractor go down the road. None of their vehicles were road ready.

Montpelier police enlisted Newport police to catch up with Pion and arrest him. He is being held by the Vermont State Police.

Not only were the cars crushed, but the vehicle equipped  radios and computer equipment within the cars was destroyed and they are unable to retrieve shotguns and rifles out of the trunks prior to having help from the Jaws of Life equipment.  Estimated damage exceeds $300,000.00.


A couple of notable items appeared in the report.  Some of the vehicles had just gotten washed. Is this the equivalent of "it will rain if you wash your car'.  The article mentioned that the Montpelier police were unsure if Pion had secured a lawyer.  Do you think they really care?  I bet not. I wonder if Roger Pion's good friend "mary jane" was involved during the time he was thinking "why don't I just take my tractor down to the police station."

Book Lovers and Losers

Christopher Meusburger of St. Paul, MN, allegedly threatened his 62 year old neighbor with a sword on Monday night after she complained about how he had mistreated a book she had loaned him.

The woman saw the book laying on the floor in the hallway, outside of her door according to the criminal complaint filed on July 31st.  She questioned Christopher as to why he had left the book on the floor.  Evidently Christopher took offense.

Christopher seems to be taking his
arrest well.

He allegedly got right in her face and said "If you weren't so weak, I would seriously hurt you!" Then...according to the report...Meusburger "chest bumped her".  The woman claims that she sensed that he was intoxicated (are we surprised???) and told him that if he continued to push her she would call the police.
At this point, Christopher ran back into his apartment and came out with a sword. He supposedly, posed in a "fighting stance" and proceeded to swing the sword. 

According to the complaintant, she feared for her life. She called the cops who arrested Meusburger.

While in custody, Christopher admitted that he had consumed 12 cans of beer but denied he had threatened his neighbor.  When asked if he knew why he was in jail, he said "Yes, because, I am an idiot."

I think we can all agree with the "idiot" part, but I am questioning the woman's version of the story as well. I can't believe if she got chest bumped by the drunk neighbor she calmly said "Please, don't push me" or something equally calm and polite.


Speaking of Books

 Terry Davis of Prospect, KY is accused of stealing a textbook from the  Barnes and Noble college bookstore near the University of Louisville's Health Sciences Center according to WDRB-TV.

Davis then went to Gray's College Bookstore to try to sell the book. However, by the time he reached the second book store, the book had been reported stolen and the fast thinking employees alerted authorities.

The arrest report said surveillance video cameras captured both the theft and the attempt to sell the book, according to Louisville Courier-Journal.

He may not have the strongest grasp of morals but he sure can provide a strong example of irony. The book he stole was  Resolving Ethical Issues.

Life in the Slow Lane

This week has been incredibly slow in the area of weird or unusual news.  Let's assume for the sake of argument that it isn't that I have gotten so jaded that nothing is striking me as weird.  Yet, that might be the case.

There were a couple of stories that I thought had some potential to report to you, but the media is being a little less than forthright in giving details.

For example:  There has been a video on You Tube of a car pulling into a parking garage.  So far that doesn't seem too far out of the ordinary, right???  Keep your eye on the guy looking from a distance..at least for a while.




I have tried to found out the specifics of where this came from and who the frighteningly bad driver is but there seems to be no details given ANYWHERE.  (if any of my readers have the pertinents, be sure to share)



 A Stunning Zombie

A Pennsylvania woman who allegedly zapped a man with a stun gun as she tried to flee the scene of a hit-and-run accident was subsequently apprehended thanks to her distinctive "ZOMBIE" vanity license plate, according to a criminal complaint.

Yardley Joy Frantz struck a man and a boy when she drove her 2008 Honda Civic into a crowd on an Allentown street Saturday evening. When a bystander confronted her as she sought to depart, Frantz removed a stun gun from the car’s glove compartment and zapped him in the chest.

Witnesses told police that the motorist, dressed in pajamas, was driving a car with "ZOMBIE" license plates. Cops quickly traced the vehicle to Frantz, who claimed she could not recall who was behind the wheel when the pedestrians were hit. A passenger in Frantz's Honda told investigators that she "carries a stun gun in the glove box of her car."

Frantz was arrested on a variety of charges, including aggravated assault, simple assault, harassment, and illegal use of an electronic incapacitation device. She was freed from custody after posting $20,000 bail.

I guess you never know when you might need to use a stun gun as you drive around town. It is a real shame she can't remember who was behind the wheel.

Do You Need A Wake Up Call?

Sold out for the summer

A room with a view isn’t hard to find, but a room with a view and a giant 100-year-old clock dominating the floor plan may exist in only one place on the planet.

You’ll have to travel to Ghent, Belgium, this summer to see the unusual rental perched 75 feet above ground and constructed around the top of the clock tower of the city’s Sint-Pieters train station – part inn, part art exhibit.
　
Welcome to the one-room Hotel Gent, open for business from only until September.
The temporary lodging is the creation of Japanese artist Tazu Rous who has made it his mission to transform public objects into something much more intimate by enclosing them in private settings.
The  summer rental was built around the clock that stands 75 feet above Ghent, Belgium.

Room comes with a clock for your convenience.

So much fascination, in fact, that overnight stays at Hotel Gent – at around $130 per night – sold out in 23 minutes. For that price, you get a studio apartment with hardwood floors, a spacious bed, a comfortable sitting area and a bath with a view of Ghent.

　

Ghent Mayor Daniël Termont was the first guest to spend the night and he told organizers that it was a very special experience. He’s used to putting his watch next to his bed to check the time, he told them, but it wasn’t necessary.

No reservation? No problem. Visitors who want to experience Hotel Gent can stop in from noon to 6 p.m. Tuesday through Sunday until it closes permanently on Sept. 16.


I know you all must be disappointed that there are no vacancies, but the upside is that the room is closed if the wind blows more than 37 miles an hour.  Evidently art-hotels aren't as sturdy as real hotels.


Robs same store three times in two days
　

Latasha Singletary is charged with robbing the same liquor store three times in less than twenty-four hours.  She was arrested at her home in Fall River, Mass after police received tips that led them to her.

Suggest reading for
Ms. Singletary

Singletary was already on probation from a robbery charge that was pending from April of 2011. That charge is also for a robbery of the same store.   Anna's Liquors seems to be the place of choice for Singletary's crime spree.　

Investigators say that Singletary went inside Anna's Liquors at 4 p.m. Tuesday with a knife and T-shirt pulled over her head and demanded that the 52-year-old clerk give her money. After that robbery, she did manage to escape and police were unable to find her.
　
Singletary then returned the next day at 10 a.m. to rob the store again, police said. This time in addition to money, cigarettes, lottery tickets and liquor bottles were also taken. While police were typing up the incident report for the morning robbery, they received a call at 2 p.m. that Singletary was robbing the store again.
　
She was being held on $25,000 bail before her arraignment Thursday.

Either Latasha really loves Anna's Liquor store or she really hates it. 

And the Award Goes To

Another week and another group of  "lesser reported" news stories.  This week I have decided to have an awards show of sorts.  Best in category if you will....


Award for the Most Unusual Pharmacy

If you can't go to the pharmacy, bring the pharmacy with you.  At least that is what a New York woman tried to do.



This is part of the inventory that was taken from Andrea's stash.
Who knew hoohas were so roomy?

Before Andrea Amanatides was set to begin a six-month sentence for a probation violation, she allegedly filled a condom with 256 prescription pills including 90 pills of Lyrica, 37 Adderall tablets, 50 Valiums, 43 Trazadones, 10 Ambiens and 26 Oxycontins, added four bags of heroin and put the condom in her vagina. (I don't believe that is a prescribed use for vaginas)



While she was waiting in an Albany County Jail holding cell, the contraband-filled condom apparently broke and one of the pills fell onto the floor. A surveillance video of Amanatides seems to show that when she tried to adjust her pill-filled groin, more pills fell out and rolled to floor from her pants leg.


Amanatides was charged with five misdemeanor counts of criminal possession of a controlled substance and felony promotion of prison contraband. She was arraigned in Colonie Town Court and sent back to county jail.





I have to believe the police did her a big favor by relieving her of her stash.  If she was put into the general population jail with her pharmacy still in place, I think the other prisoners would be entering illegally to get some of the drugs.


Award for the Most Irate Ex-Girlfriend

A North Carolina woman is facing a malicious castration charge (there is a charge you don't hear of everyday)  after she allegedly squeezed the scrotum of a 59-year-old acquaintance so vigorously that one of the victim’s testicles was dislodged, according to police.

The victim told Shelby Police Department officers that he was attacked early Saturday morning by Joyce Maxine Gregory, with whom he had been arguing in his apartment.  According to cops, Gregory and the man had previously been in “some sort of a romantic relationship.”

As detailed in a wince-inducing police report, the victim told cops that Gregory “grabbed him by his scrotum” in a vise-like grip. While he was able to “jerk away from her grip,” the man freed himself after Gregory had succeeded in squeezing a testicle out of his scrotum.

Officer M. L. McPherson reported that the victim’s “scrotum had been split open,” adding that, “I was also able to observe one of the subject’s testicles protruding from the scrotum area.”

Along with malicious castration, Gregory was charged with assault causing serious bodily injury (both counts are felonies). Now locked up in the county jail in lieu of $20,000 bond, Gregory is scheduled for a June 18 court hearing.

  On the way to jail, she removed her pants and urinated on the back seat of the patrol car.  She is also, receiving awards in the category of most "Unlady-Like Behavior" and an honorable mention in the category of "Vicious Bitches".

It's a Tie...Awards for Being the Worst Parents of the Week.

First Award in this Category for the Week....

Chicago police received a surprise this week when they reportedly found a three-year-old girl holding a handgun during a routine traffic stop.

An officer in Chicago pulled a car of six people over in East Garfield Park, a  community on the west side of Chicago, last Wednesday. Two children were seated in the vehicle sans any type of car seat or restraints. 

As the police approach the car, they noticed that the driver, Queshawn King was frantically making movement towards a three year old girl while yelling out her name, "Fatty",  multiple times.


A police sergeant approached the little girl who was seated on the front passenger side of the car and saw that she was holding a 9 mm handgun. The sergeant tried to retrieve the weapon but the little girl tossed the gun onto the floor. Luckily the gun didn't discharge, although the car was loaded with 8 rounds.

King was charged with felony unlawful use of a weapon for having a loaded weapon inside the vehicle, misdemeanor endangering the life and health of a child, and misdemeanor possession of a firearm without a valid license.

I would add multiple charges for the fact, he called a little girl Fatty.  Really???  It's bad enough to make your three year old a gun moll but naming a child Fatty....he should get life.


Second Award For Bad Parent of the Week
 

 A marijuana-smoking woman was arrested on Saturday in Phoenix after she accidentally drove away with her five-week-old son in a child safety seat on the roof of her vehicle, police said.

The baby fell off the car in the middle of an intersection, albeit unnoticed by the driver/mother.  The baby was found unharmed and  still strapped into the seat, said Phoenix police spokesman James Holmes.

The mother Catalina Clouser was booked into jail on child abuse and aggravated assault charges, he said. The infant was taken to a local hospital as a precaution and is in the custody of state Child Protective Services.

According to the report, earlier in the day, Clouser and her boyfriend had been smoking marijuana in a park when they decided to go for a beer run taking the infant with them.  They, however, got stopped and the boyfriend was arrested for driving under the influence.

Clouser was so upset that she went over to a friend's house smoke some more marijuana. At about midnight she got into her car to leave.  The problem, however, is that she had placed the baby still in the car seat up on top of the car before driving off.

Clouser apparently did not realize that the baby was missing until she arrived home.

***Shaking my head**** Really, could this chick have made any more bad decisions in a one day period? Smoking weed and needing a beer chaser, letting boyfriend drive under the influence with your kid "in" the car, (as opposed to on the roof),  setting baby on  the roof of car, driving under the influence,  and not noticing a baby falling off the roof of a car.  Is it wrong that the only positive thing I see in the story is that she at least uses a car seat?