The House of Shame

For every time I didn't speak up...

shame.

For every time I didn't challenge the bigot...

shame.

For every time I had that sinking feeling in my stomach but remained still...

shame.

For every time a leader crossed the line and I looked away...

shame.

For every time the group went too far...

shame.

For every time I heard my conscience question, but I didn't answer...

shame.

And for everything I've learned from failing so long ago...

thank you. I am no longer silent.

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.


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inspiration

Burn

After many years of working as a human resources practitioner I am rarely surprised by the odd behavior that people exhibit in the workplace. Let's face it, human nature can be quirky. When you combine quirky behavior with the reality that most leaders do not enjoy confrontation, you have the perfect situation for HR to assist in resolving problems. 

I Said "Rarely"

What does continue to surprise me, sadly, are the comments related to race or ethnicity that for some reason have popped up over the years.

The obvious pearl of wisdom that should be shared at this point is that those comments are never tolerated and appropriate action is taken. A good HR response, right?

But here's the rub for me...

These comments make me burn inside. I don't mean that I simply get upset that someone is being an insensitive jerk. I'm talking about the bias I have as I am made aware of these behaviors.

"We all have our own lens that we see the world through, and my lens has a hypersensitivity to narrow-minded bigots." 

I'm fully supportive of free speech, and everyone's right to have an opinion. But I'll be damned if a racist is going to hurt the reputation of my organization.

Too harsh? Too bad. 

Who's Laughing Now

One of the tremendous advantages and responsibilities of human resources leaders is that we can take action when behavior steps outside what is expected. Combined with the mission and values of each organization, the authority to act allows for the right thing to be done.

While "good 'ol boys" and jokes that evoke nervous laughter (read here --> what a loser!) sometimes influence culture, we as HR leaders have the responsibility to break through those pathetic behaviors and move our organizations in a new direction based on accountability, dignity, and respect.

One of the most embarrassing things for those that cling to these discriminatory ideals is that the modern world of work values diversity as a strategy for success. They clearly are out of touch in so many ways. When all people are not welcomed as equal members of the team, the whole company suffers. 

How About You

When was the last time you were surprised at work? Was it from a goofy misstep, or was it something more serious? If it was someone acting like an insensitive fool, did you do something about it?

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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Regrets, Not Doubts

I learned a lot of important rules about family, faith, and my country growing up. All three categories seemed to blend together into a core set of beliefs that made perfect sense back then, and still do today:

- be thankful for your freedom
- no one is better than anyone else
- work hard at school and later in your job
- help others in need when you can
- violence is never a first option
- treat everyone with respect
- learn from history

I don't think most people would disagree with these rules. However, I do not believe that the items on this list are embraced in the way they should be in a modern, educated world, let alone in the workplace.

Regrets
Regret can be a powerful emotion. Usually it refers to the feeling that we should have acted in a certain way, but we chose not to do so. It doesn't mean we accidentally didn't act, it means we chose not to act and we feel badly about it later.

Let's refer to the list again and ask ourselves a few questions:

- Are we thankful for the many freedoms we enjoy, including the freedom to write about our differences without fear of reprisal or censorship?

- Have we judged ourselves to be better than someone else? Perhaps they are not the same color, or have a different sexual orientation, or practice a different religion? Do they still receive the same respect our white christian friends receive?

Regret is a powerful tool to help us improve as people. It also allows for a bright light to shine on the bigots and make their true feelings known as we examine our own choices, and the choices of those around us. You see, the narrow-minded and judgemental folks who claim to know "what's right" are usually the ones fanning the flames of exclusion, and inadvertently, hate.

That is wrong.

Doubts

Doubt refers to a sense of uncertainty, and is associated with a delay in taking action due to concerns about whether or not something is the right thing to do at a particular moment in time. While regret teaches us about making the appropriate choices in life, doubt can be an enemy that blocks our courage to follow the rules from the list above.

While we all have regrets about not speaking up at various times in our lives to support the rights and freedoms of all people; there should never be any doubt about what must be done. It is incumbent on us as leaders both inside and outside our organizations to stand up for the freedoms of all people.

How About You
Do the people in your life know what you stand for? Do the employees in your organization know that you respect everyone in society? Simply put, it is impossible to be a bigot in your personal life and then talk about how every employee should be treated fairly at work. You're lying to your team, and to your self...and that is wrong.

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.



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